Family Storms (36 page)

“Let's get to the mall,” Kiera said. “We really do need to get your ears pierced, remember?”

Instead of going someplace for pizza afterward, however, we all went to Marcia's house. She had a younger brother, but her parents had left for a weekend in San Diego and had taken him along. Kiera had told me that Marcia's father owned car dealerships up and down the coast. A girl whose parents were only middle-class would have a hard time being friends with members of the VA club, I thought. She would always be intimidated by their clothes, their jewelry, and their cars. That feeling was reinforced when I saw Marcia's family's home, a sprawling two-story in a place called Brentwood Park. She had a live-in maid, too, but her maid had the night off.

We did order in pizza, and then, to my surprise, boys began to arrive. Ricky and Boyd came first, and then three other boys followed—Tony Sussman, Jack Martin, and Ruben Weiner. They were all seniors as well. In fact, I was the only one there who wasn't. As before, no one seemed particularly involved with anyone else. When they danced, everyone was dancing with everyone. I saw the vodka being added to the soda and juice, but when Marcia offered me some, Kiera interfered.

“Sasha doesn't drink,” she said. She said it so sharply that Marcia looked as if she had been slapped.

“Well, excuse me. I didn't know we had a Mormon in the club.”

“She's not a Mormon. I promised my mother I wouldn't let her get into any drinking after what happened to her parents, remember? They were killed by a drunk driver.”

“Oh. Sorry,” Marcia said, turning to me and looking as if she would burst into tears.

Kiera seemed to wink with her whole face. She leaned over to whisper, “She needs to drink to have fun. You and I don't.”

Later, Ricky spent more time with me. We sat and talked and ate.

“I've got to work tomorrow,” he said. “I have next weekend off, and I'm sure I'll get the boat.”

“I've never been on a boat,” I said.

“You will be next weekend.” He looked at the others and then brought his lips to mine. It wasn't a quick peck, either. It was a soft, long kiss. I closed my eyes, and when I opened them, I expected that everyone would be looking at us, but no one was.

We kissed again and again before the party ended, but we didn't do much more. I wasn't disappointed, but I was anticipating it. When Kiera announced that we had to leave, Ricky followed us out. He kissed me again before I got into the car. I knew Kiera was watching.

“See you soon,” he said, but he held on to my arm. Then he leaned in, bringing his lips to my ear. “I hear you were inducted into the VA club,” he whispered. “I hope I'm the one.”

He turned and walked back into the house before I could respond, not that I knew what to say. When I got into the car, Kiera asked me immediately what he had whispered. I told her. I was surprised that he knew about the club.

“He's okay. He has the Good Sexkeeping Seal of
Approval,” she said nonchalantly, and started the car. As we drove out, she slowed down and turned to me, “But as for him initiating you, that's not his decision—or yours, for that matter.”

“What do you mean?”

“We'll bring it up at the next meeting, and the members will vote on it. There are four other boys who are approved for initiations, right now only four boys.”

“You mean everyone votes on which boy each girl is with for the first time?”

“Of course. That way, no one makes a serious mistake. When I said I was going to be your protective older sister, I meant it,” she said. “It's the least I can do for you, and I appreciate your letting me do it. We're all sisters now. The members of the club think clearly and carefully about each girl's sexual experiences. Everyone there has far more experience than you have. Why shouldn't you benefit from their experiences? Believe me, my mother wouldn't be any sort of adviser when it comes to sex. Sometimes I think she and my father stopped doing it.

“Despite what some people tell you, sex for the first time is the most important time. Our four boys know how to make love to a virgin. There have been no complaints,” she added, smiling.

We drove on.

It was on the tip of my tongue to ask, but I didn't.
Whatever happened to love?

28
Decision

A
strange thing happened at school during the days that followed. The more I hung out with the older students, whether at lunch or talking to them in the halls between classes and going with Kiera and the others to malls or restaurants, the more invisible I became to my classmates. Those who had once been impressed with my being so lovey-dovey with a senior boy were now indifferent to me. No one said hello or even nodded at me. They walked past me as though I weren't there.

I continued to do well in class and improve on the clarinet, but when Mr. Denacio announced that I would have a seat in the senior band and issued me a uniform, everyone else in the class took it as if it had been expected. It wasn't so much an achievement as simply another assumed step.
Big deal
was written across their faces. Ironically, Kiera and the club members were the only friends I had. No one my own age would give me the time of day.

One Wednesday, Kiera told me that we were having a
meeting of the VA club at Deidre's house after school on Friday, and I was the main topic. She asked me how my period had been since she had given me her pill. I had gone through it far better than any time I had had it before and told her so.

“My doctor says we should take the pill afterward, too,” she said. “It will prevent you from having those severe cramps next time. These are for you. Take one every day now.”

I thanked her and took one every morning as her doctor had prescribed. As Friday drew closer, I was even more nervous for the VA club meeting than I had been the first time. After all, it was to be all about my first sexual experience.

The other girls were already there when we arrived, sitting in the same places. They all looked very serious. I saw the pictures of four boys on the coffee table: Ricky, Boyd, Ruben Weiner, and Tony Sussman. Deidre brought a chair for me and put it in the center so I'd face all of the girls.

“We didn't ask you last time,” Margot began, “but how much experience do you have? How far have you gone with a boy?”

I looked at Kiera, but she was just as serious and stone-faced as they were.

“All I've ever done with a boy I did at Marcia's party with Ricky,” I said.

“Just kiss?” Marcia said, squinting and crinkling her nose as though kissing were more disgusting. “What, did you grow up in Disneyland?”

“There's no reason to pick on her,” Kiera said. “You
weren't exactly Miss Sophisticated when we brought you into the club.”

Marcia blushed and sat back.

“That still leaves Tony out. He moves too fast, assuming the girl has been on the verge,” Deidre said. “Everyone agree?”

They all nodded, and she turned Tony's picture over.

“Can she go on a date? Will your mother permit it?” Doris asked.

“I doubt it,” Kiera said. “My mother refuses to see her as anything but a ten-year-old, and she has this thing about added responsibility for her.”

“She doesn't look ten now,” Margot said. “I want to know where you got that fuchsia outfit you wore the other day.”

I looked at Kiera. Hadn't she ever worn it?

“Like it will look as good on you,” Doris muttered.

“Can we get on with the business at hand?” Kiera said sharply.

“Ruben uses his love machine,” Deidre says. “It's an SUV. All the seats go down, and he throws an air mattress in it. It feels like a waterbed.”

“You should know,” Doris said, smiling.

“Like you don't?”

Doris laughed.

“In any case, he'd be better if it was going to be a straight-out date, don't you think?” Deidre asked. Everyone nodded, and she turned his picture over.

“It's between Boyd and Ricky, and we know how you feel about Ricky already,” Marcia said.

“Ricky's usually the most gentle,” Doris added.

“I prefer Boyd,” Margot said.

“It's not your initiation.

It's hers,” Doris told her.

“Boyd is more professional about it. He spends more time on foreplay,” Margot insisted.

“I think this should be a secret ballot,” Kiera announced. “There's a little too much personal business going on here.”

“Whatever,” Margot said.

Deidre produced a sticky pad and handed each girl a sheet.

“I don't have a pen,” Margot said.

“Use your lipstick,” Doris told her.

“Then everyone will know it's my vote. That's not a secret ballot.”

“I'm just kidding, stupid.”

Deidre got up, walked out, and returned with pens for those who didn't have any.

“Just an
R
or a
B
is all that's necessary,” Kiera said.

I watched as they spread out to vote. It wasn't until they all handed their folded papers to Kiera that the full realization of what they were deciding for me hit me. I had sworn their oath, and I had gotten the tattoo, but I wasn't confident that I could go through with the rest of it, especially if they had chosen Boyd. Kiera didn't announce the votes. She opened each slip and put it on the right. She put none on the left.

“It's settled,” she said. “Unanimous. Ricky.”

“When?” Margot asked immediately.

“As it happens, we're all going on Ricky's boat
tomorrow,” Kiera said. “I didn't say anything until I knew for sure and knew this would be the vote for sure. I mean, Boyd will be there, too, but Ricky's the one.”

“And you can make it dangerous, too,” Margot said, “if it happens on the boat.”

“No, that wouldn't count as dangerous,” Kiera said. “It's only us. Besides, you wanted real privacy the first time, as I recall. I heard Tony almost had to use a sheet with a hole.”

“That's not true!” she cried.

Everyone laughed.

“Let's have some music,” Deidre declared, “and order some Chinese.”

Everyone rose to congratulate me as if I had done or would do something historic. Maybe I was naive about sex, but I knew that what they expected me to do, what I would do, was not all that much of an accomplishment, except, of course, that it would make me solid with these girls. I'd be part of their family, and for an orphan, that was some accomplishment.

“I bet you're really excited,” Kiera said after we left Deidre's house.

“This is all supposed to happen tomorrow on Ricky's boat?”

“Sure. It has two staterooms. Don't look so worried. You'll do fine.”

She made it sound like a performance or a test. When we arrived home, however, we were both almost grounded. Mrs. March had learned the truth. The drama teacher had not held auditions for the play yet. She intercepted us just before we were about to go upstairs.

“In here,” she commanded, standing in the living-room doorway.

Kiera and I looked at each other. On the way into the living room, she whispered, “Whatever it is, let me do all the talking.”

Mrs. March was alone. She stood with her arms folded under her breasts and nodded toward one of the settees. We sat.

“What now, Mother?” Kiera asked.

“What now? Why did both of you lie to me about the auditions? There were no auditions that day. Well?”

“I was too embarrassed to tell you that I had made a mistake and misread the date on the bulletin-board announcement. We actually went to the auditorium and felt like idiots. At least, I did. It wasn't Sasha's fault, so don't blame her.”

“But you continued the lie, giving me that story about changing your minds,” Mrs. March said, looking from Kiera to me. I couldn't look directly at her.

“Yes.”

“Why? Why wouldn't you just tell me the truth? You made a mistake?”