Authors: Tammy Blackwell
“
First,
the cake is a lie
? Thanks for that
vote of confidence. And secondly, a brain injury?
Seriously?”
Joshua, who was about three-quarters of the
way asleep, allowed a single eyelid to slit open. “Did someone say
cake?”
“
It wasn’t so much a brain
injury as a concussion,” said Jase.
“
A concussion is a brain
injury, genius.”
Jase looked at Talley, who confirmed my
facts.
“
Well, he’s no longer brain
injured, so unwind your knickers.”
Again Joshua’s eye slit open. “Did someone
say Snickers?” And then he snored.
“
Is it an eating disorder
or sleeping disorder?” The guy seemed nice enough, and I was all
for an enemy of my enemy being my friend, but Joshua was about
three steps to the Russell Brand side of weird.
“
It’s a circadian rhythm
issue,” Joshua said without opening his eyes. “This staying awake
all day is killing me.”
“
To be fair, it’s also an
incurable sweet tooth issue,” Talley said. “Apparently living
forever means you can live off a steady diet of sugar and starch
without having to worry about diabetes.”
“
You’re just
jealous.”
“
And you’re somehow snoring
and talking at the same time. Go to bed.”
“
Talley Matthews, I am old
enough to be your grandfather. Do not tell me what to
do.”
We all just sat there and watched Talley
stare him down.
“
Fine,” he finally relented
not thirty seconds later.
Not long after Joshua shuffled into the
house, everyone else began succumbing to exhaustion. I was tired,
too, but I just couldn’t bring myself to go inside. With the influx
of people, Michelle redid all the sleeping arrangements, throwing
Liam and me in the same room. That was not a situation I wanted to
walk into. So, instead I stayed on the porch, watching the stars
from a cocoon of blankets.
“
Got room in there for
me?”
I opened up one side of my blankets.
“There’s always room for Talley-O.”
My best friend snuggled in beside me,
resting her head on my shoulder. “Go ahead,” I said when I felt the
gentle push of her Sight. Since she was touching me, I knew each
emotion she felt: surprise, sympathy, and finally,
exasperation.
“
I did it
again.”
“
Did what again?” she
asked.
“
I screwed up with this
whole mating thing.” I rubbed a hand over my face. “God, I hate
this aspect of Shifter life. Aren’t relationships hard enough
without adding in some supernatural life-long binding
crap?”
“
Talk to me about
it.”
“
Why? Didn’t you already
grab it out of my head?”
She burrowed in closer, the fragrance of her
baby shampoo overpowering every other scent. The smell brought back
so many memories I felt choked by them all.
“
Maybe I need you to
explain it to me.”
“
Maybe you’re trying some
sort of psycho-analytical bull crap.”
A silent chuckle. “Maybe, but tell me about
it anyway.”
I sighed. “Rachel says Liam and I are mates,
and since I get the same sort of snippets of emotions off of him
that I do when you’re projecting to me, I tend to believe her.”
Because, let’s face it, that’s what all those phantom emotions
were. I wasn’t fooling anyone, myself included, by pretending
otherwise.
“
And you don’t want to be
Liam’s mate?”
A star shot across the sky, and like a
little kid, I made a silent wish.
“
Did you know Rachel says
you’re a star? All Seers are. You’re stars, and I’m the moon. I’m
not sure what Joshua is supposed to be. Maybe a cloud.”
“
Scout, you’re avoiding the
question.”
Yes. Yes, I am.
“
He’s not the person I
thought he was.”
“
And is that a good thing
or a bad thing?”
“
He’s not angry," I said.
"Well, he is angry, but he’s also sad. And guilty. And
overwhelmingly burdened with the weight of the entire
world.”
“
Reminds me of this blond
chick I used to know.”
“
He’s so Dominant and bossy
you want to strangle him half the time, but when no one’s looking,
he’s kind and thoughtful. He even has a sense of humor.”
“
Sounds like a pretty good
guy.”
“
He’s a great
guy.”
“
Not to mention incredibly
attractive.”
“
Ridiculously
so.”
“
Do you think you could
love him?”
“
I know I do.”
Good God. I said it out loud. That made it
real, right?
“
So, what’s the
problem?”
“
Take your pick. He thinks
I’m betraying Alex. His wolf chose me as his mate, and he resents
it. We’re in the middle of picking a fight with the most powerful
Shifters on the planet, which isn’t exactly the ideal time to get
involved in a relationship.” When I tasted blood, I removed the
inside of my cheek from my teeth. “And let’s not leave out the
whole ‘Scout is a love whore’ issue.”
Talley tilted her face up. “What is a love
whore exactly?”
“
You know, some reckless
person who goes around falling in love with every attractive guy
she comes across. Charlie. Alex. Liam. I’m all, ‘Oh! Pretty boy!’
and the next thing you know I’m ruining everyone’s lives because I
want to curl up inside them and live there forever.”
“
That is quite possibly the
most bizarre and creepy description of what it feels like to fall
in love I’ve ever heard.”
“
Falling in love
is
bizarre and
creepy.”
“
And awesomtastically,
amazingly wonderful.” A huge smile. “I know you think you made a
mistake when you forced Jase to declare me his mate, but you
didn’t. You did us both the biggest favor anyone has done for
someone else ever.”
You couldn’t argue against the joy radiating
from her. “You’re going to have to tell me how exactly you two
became the world’s happiest couple.”
“
I will. After.”
“
After what?”
“
After you become
Alpha.”
I couldn’t stop a chuckle from squeaking out
of my throat. “Are you bribing me to stay alive, Talley Anne
Matthews?”
“
And accept the position
once you earn it.”
“
Jase really has been a bad
influence on you.”
“
He says the same thing
about you.” Her voice was laced with humor, but when she sat up, it
was gone. “You’re going to survive this.”
“
Of course I am.” I tried
for a smile. “Me and Death, we keep going at each other, and I keep
coming out on top. Why would this time be any
different?”
“
This time, you have the
hope of an entire species and the heart of a mate depending on your
survival.”
I glowered. “Thank you. Like I needed more
stress.”
“
I’m just ‘keeping it
real,’ as the kids like to say.”
“
What kids?”
“
The ones from
1990.”
We sat in silence for a while after that. I
was thinking about being “the hope of an entire species” while
Talley might have dozed off a bit.
“
You realize the fault in
your logic, don’t you?”
Or maybe she was just staying super-quiet so
she could scare the pee out of me when she finally decided to speak
again.
“
My logic is always sound,
but which particular logical explanation are you having trouble
understanding?”
“
Liam’s
wolf
chose you to be his
mate?”
“
Our wolves… they mesh.
They always have.” He was the first thing Wolf Scout knew in this
world, and her trust of him has never wavered. She considered him
hers, and he didn’t seemed to have any problems with her claim.
Their bond was undeniable. “Wolf Liam took the choice away from
Human Liam.”
It ripped my heart in two to admit such a
thing, so it ticked me off a little that Talley found it so
freaking hysterical.
“
Wolf Liam? Human Liam? You
act like they’re two different people.”
“
They are.”
“
Are Wolf Scout and Human
Scout different?”
“
Of course.”
“
How?”
Why was she asking me? Wasn’t she the one
who explained it all to me in the first place?
“
Wolf Scout is all instinct
and acts without thought. I over think what I’m having for
breakfast.”
“
But the base things - your
beliefs, hopes, fears, and
loves
- do those change? Or is Scout always Scout, no
matter how she may look?”
I could see where this was going.
“
It’s
different…”
“
And even if Liam’s wolf
was the one to make the choice to take you as his mate - which I
don’t believe for one minute - you’re ignoring the fact that if
ever there was a wolf who sometimes took human form instead of the
other way around, it’s Liam Cole.”
This is why every girl needs a best friend.
Sometimes you have to have someone to pull your head out of the
sand and show you the stuff you’re too stubborn or stupid to
see.
“
You think he does want to
be with me?”
“
Seriously? You have to
ask?”
I collapsed against the back of the glider,
relief and frustration vying for the top spot. “Then why is he
being so difficult about the whole situation? Couldn’t he just kiss
me and say, ‘Yay. We like each other and get to spend the rest of
our lives together’? Is that really so hard?”
“
I didn’t say you guys
don’t have baggage.”
“
Alex?”
“
Alex.”
And back into a little ball I went. “I know
he’s not Alex, Tal. Seriously, I do.”
“
I know that, but does
Liam?”
“
Ummm….”
“
And what about
Charlie?”
“
Confusing Charlie with
Liam has never been a problem.”
“
You know that isn’t what I
meant.”
“
Charlie and me…” How to
explain it? “Until the day I die I’m going to feel responsible for
Charlie’s emotional well being, and he’s going to keep doing stupid
stuff like shooting himself in the leg to try to protect me. We’ll
love each other forever, but like family. Any chance we ever had at
a romance died along with Alex. We’ve both accepted that.” And
while it still made my heart ache, I really had accepted it fully.
“One day he’s going to meet someone I deem worthy, and their kids
will call me ‘Aunt Scout’. Every time they get in trouble, I’ll
tell them a story of something equally horrific we did as
children.”
“
Remind me to keep your
actual nieces and nephews far, far away from you.”
“
Not a chance, future
sister-in-law.”
Talley’s hand stroked through my hair. “I’m
going to go out on a limb here and say Liam doesn’t know any of
this either.”
“
Stories about our
energy-filled, misguided youth?”
A classic Talley/Mom look.
“That you and Charlie aren’t
you and
Charlie
.”
“
It’s never come
up.”
“
You have to talk to him,
Scout. You can’t just go around hoping things will work themselves
out. You have to do some of the heavy lifting.”
“
You know, he’s probably
overheard this entire conversation, so I don’t really--”
“
Talk to him.”
“
How about
after?”
“
How about now?”
I growled, but not because Talley was
pushing me. It was because she was right and I knew it. I looked up
to the second story as if Shifterdom came with X-ray vision.
Talley stood and stretched. “I can see my
work here is done.” She grabbed my hand, hauling me to my feet.
“Now, get up there and claim your mate, Scout Donovan,
Donovan-Hagan-Matthews Pack Leader and future Alpha Female.”
***
There was a wolf in my bed.
No. Not “a wolf”. I had to quit thinking of
it like that. Liam. Liam was in wolf form in my bed.
And if he could cheat, then so could I.
“
It was the day we fought
the wolf pack,” I said, sitting down on the side of the bed. “I
know I didn’t tell you before, but the only reason I was able to
Change so fast in the daylight was because I knew if I didn’t, you
would die, and I couldn’t let that happen. I couldn’t lose you.” I
buried a hand in his fur, and he laid his head on my leg. “I almost
died myself. I know that you know it was bad, but I’m telling you I
was there, in that In Between place with Alex, and I was given the
choice. I could go quietly into that gentle night and be with him
forever, or I could come back and rage against the dying of the
light to be with you.” I looked into his eyes, eyes that were one
hundred percent human. “I chose you, Liam. I didn’t even have to
think about it.”
I brought my hand up to rub the fur on top
of his head and tried to ignore the way it was shaking. “I know you
don’t want this whole mating thing, and honestly, I think we’re way
too young to be making lifelong commitments, but it’s over and done
with now. Maybe it’s not what either of us planned on happening,
and maybe it’s not the ideal situation, but it’s the one we’ve been
given. And it may be selfish, but I can’t help but be happy that
I’m going to get to spend the rest of my life getting to know you.
I mean, I know it’s not going to be easy, and we’ll probably have
such epic fights there will have to be an entire volume devoted to
them in The Repository, but I want to be there for all of it.”