FATHER IN TRAINING (34 page)

As her mother had before him, Thomas had abandoned her. She'd punished him the only way she knew how—by withdrawing emotionally, retreating into her safe world of lists and schedules. The rules never let her down. But they did leave her lonely.

"I'm sorry, Thomas," she whispered, and in that moment saw all she could have done to meet her husband halfway. But it was too late. He was gone.

And here she was, repeating the same mistake again. She was about to lose another man. The man of her dreams. Her soul mate. She had to see him, to talk to him and explain. Except Kyle already knew her darkest secrets.

Sandy
walked toward the kitchen. As she passed through the dining room, she remembered the last time Kyle had come over and they'd used this room. He'd sat at the head of the table and made the children laugh with his easy humor. It had felt right to be together, but even then, she'd been trying to find a way to destroy everything. She'd allowed her fear to control her heart.

She loved him, she thought as she walked into the kitchen. She loved him enough to try. But was it too late?

Her three children looked up at her. Their gazes were wary. Not because she might be angry, but because of what Lindsay would have told them about last night. That telling Kyle she was sorry might not be enough to get him back.

She pulled out a chair and sat down. Nichole set her spoon on the table. "You don't look happy, Mommy."

"I'm fine." She ruffled her daughter's bright curls. "We need to have a family meeting."

"What's that?" Blake asked. He was still in his space-fighter pajamas. His hair hadn't been combed and his glasses were sliding down his nose. But the shadows were gone from his eyes.

Lindsay rolled her eyes. "Don't you guys know anything? It's when we all sit around and talk about things. In some families, they even vote on things."

"Vote?" Blake asked. "You mean I get a vote."

Sandy
wrinkled her nose. "Yes, we're going to have a vote, but first I have something to say." She cleared her throat. "It has come to my attention that I haven't been listening to you guys as much as I should. I want you to know I'm sorry for that. I love each of you very much. This move has been hard on all of us, but it's working out. I'm proud of how you're helping and I want you all to be happy. So from now on, we're going to have regular family meetings and discuss things. All right?"

They all nodded.

"Is there anything you'd like to say?" she asked. "Anything you want changed?"

"No more stars," Blake said. "I hate that dumb poster."

"Me too," Lindsay said. "I'm way too old to get stars, Mom."

"I like it." Nichole glared at her brother and sister. "I want to keep the stars. I like getting presents."

Sandy
held up her hand. "Okay, Blake and Lindsay, you two will get a chore list but no stars. Nichole, honey, you can keep your stars and you'll still get your rewards when you've done what you're supposed to."

"Neat," Nichole said, then picked up her spoon and starting eating.

Sandy
cleared her throat. The next part wasn't going to be so easy. "It has also come to my attention that each of us is very fond of Kyle. Is that true?"

"He's okay," Lindsay said,
then
grinned.

Nichole just nodded, but Blake stared at her. "You guys getting married?"

"I don't know," she answered. "We haven't exactly discussed it. In fact, he's not very happy with me right now."

"I told you, Mom, tell him you're sorry," Lindsay reminded her.

"It's not that simple. Between adults, things can get complicated." She didn't know what to tell them. That she'd completely messed up? "I'm going to go talk to him."

"When?" Blake asked.

"Later," she said firmly. "But if things do work out, I assume no one would object to his being a part of our family?"

"I like Kyle," Nichole said. "He tells me stories." Blake and Lindsay nodded.

"Don't worry, Mom. Kyle thinks you're hot," her son told her.

She stared at him. "How do you know that?"

Blake blushed. "It's a guy thing, Mom. You're just gonna have to trust me on this."

Great. What other guy things had they been talking about? She shook her head and decided she didn't want to know.

She rose to her feet and tightened the belt of her robe. "So we're in agreement. Later today, I'll go talk to Kyle and explain things. I have to warn you,
though,
he might not want to get involved again. It wouldn't have anything to do with you children, though. It would be about me and Kyle. So no one should get upset with him. Okay?"

They nodded. She started out of the room. She heard whispering behind her, but when she turned to look at her children, they were staring at her. Smiling. She got a funny feeling in the pit of her stomach. Smiling,
whispering
children was not a good sign.

Kyle hosed off the Camaro. His car didn't really need washing, but he was tired of staying inside. He couldn't avoid
Sandy
forever. So what if she came by? He would smile and be neighborly. It was all she'd ever wanted from him. She'd made that clear from the beginning. He was the one who'd crossed the line.

He hadn't slept at all the previous night, but he wasn't tired. He wasn't anything except hurting bad. His chest tightened every few seconds to remind him his heart had been ripped out. As if he would forget. He'd hoped—

He shook his head. Hell, he'd been a fool. Yeah, he'd hoped
Sandy
would come running after him last night and tell him he was right. That she had been hiding and she was tired of it. That she was ready to admit she loved him and wanted to be with him always. But she hadn't. And all this morning, there had been nothing. She hadn't changed her mind. It wasn't going to happen. He supposed he only had himself to blame.

Maybe he should move. Waiting around hoping to catch a glimpse of her was a stupid way to spend his day off. He should go
do
something fun. The problem was, he couldn't think of anything. He had it bad if he would rather stand around missing her than be with someone else.

He heard the front door of her house close. He glanced up and saw Lindsay strolling toward him. He set the hose down and reached for the chamois.

"How's it going?" he asked as she got closer.

"Okay. I came to apologize," she said, shuffling her feet and looking embarrassed. "I was pretty stupid yesterday. I'm sorry you had to go through that with me."

He walked over and put his arm around her. "No harm done. Your mom told you the charges were dropped, right?"

"Yeah. She said you wanted me to go through everything. I wouldn't have wanted to, but I understand what you were trying to do. I got the message, Kyle. I'm not going to make that mistake again."

"Good." He tried to smile at her and failed miserably, then turned back to his car. Jeez, it even hurt to look at Lindsay. Mostly because she reminded him of
Sandy
. She might have her father's coloring, but certain of her actions—the way she pushed her hair off her face, or the way she walked—came from her mother.

Lindsay glanced over her shoulder at the house. "Um, my mom didn't sleep very good last night. Did you guys have a fight over me?"

"Not exactly. It started out being about you, but it was really about a lot of other things."

"Oh." She shoved her hands into her shorts' pockets. "I'm sorry, Kyle. I didn't mean to upset things."

"You didn't." He touched her cheek. "Your mom and I have had some problems from the start. You didn't have anything to do with them. We just have different ways of looking at things."

"But that doesn't mean you can't get along. Unless you don't really, you know, love her."

His gaze narrowed. "Why are you asking me that?"

She blushed. "I didn't mean to pry. I just thought if you cared, you could work it out."

Sound advice, only he wasn't the one with the problem.
Sandy
had thrown him out and said she didn't want to have him in her life. He'd been willing to marry her. That was the hell of it. He was
still
willing to marry her.

"Loving someone isn't always enough. I know that sounds strange, but it's true."

Lindsay brightened. "So you do love her?"

"Yeah, I do."

"Great!"

"Why all these questions?"

"Oh, no reason. No reason at all." But her smile was a little too wide and she couldn't hide the sparkle in her eye.

"What have you got planned, young lady?"

"Nothing." She raised herself on tiptoe and kissed his cheek. "You're the greatest, Kyle. I know you're not my dad, and I'll always miss him, but I'm sure glad you're around." She started to walk away,
then
glanced back at him. "Moms can make mistakes, too, you know. Sometimes they even figure it out, but then they have to apologize and they don't do that real well."

He froze in place. "What does that mean?"

"You'll have to wait and see." She took off running toward the house.

Kyle wanted to race after her and demand she tell him what was going on. But by the time his stunned brain got the message to his feet, she'd already disappeared inside.

Moms can make mistakes, too, you know.
Did that mean what he thought it meant, or was this just another case of wishful thinking? Had
Sandy
realized he meant what he said? Did she believe that he loved her?

Before he could figure out the answer, Blake came walking around from the rear of his house. "I was at Robby's," the boy said. "I'm going to try out for pitcher next year."

"Great," Kyle said, still thinking about what Lindsay had told him.

"We had a family meeting today," Blake said. "We talked about you, but Lindsay says I'm not supposed to say anything."

"What?" Kyle stared at the boy. "What aren't you supposed to say?"

Blake shrugged,
then
grinned. "But I wouldn't mind if you married my mom."

Like his sister, he went running off. Kyle stared after him. Hope blossomed inside, like a dormant seed brought to life. He told himself he was a fool, and that he was heading for another fall. But he didn't care. If
Sandy
had called a family meeting and discussed him, then she couldn't want him completely out of their lives. Unless the meeting had been to tell the children that. But if that were the case, why would the kids seem so happy?

He tossed the chamois down and started toward her house. He was going to get some answers. When he got closer, he realized Nichole was playing with her doll on the porch, in the shade of a crepe myrtle tree.

"Hi, Kyle," she said as he approached.

"Hi, yourself. Where's your mom?"

"She's in the shower." Nichole giggled. "We painted our fingers. Look!" She held up her hand. The nails had been painted bright pink.

"They're very pretty," he said, trying to hide his impatience. If
Sandy
was in the shower, he couldn't just go barging in, although the thought of her naked and dripping wet was quite appealing. If nothing else, he wouldn't mind having the upper hand with her for once. "Could you tell your mom that I—" That he what? He thought about waiting until
Sandy
was finished, then remembered what Lindsay had said. That
Sandy
wanted to apologize, but that it might be difficult for her. He should give her the time she needed. Better for both of them if she came to him. Not only would he know for sure that she really wanted him, but his ego could use a little TLC after the way she'd run him off. Nichole waited patiently.

"Don't tell her anything," he said. "I'll tell her myself, when I see her."

"Okay." Nichole returned her attention to her
doll, that
glanced up at him. "Lindsay says you're going to be our new daddy and I'm glad."