Feels Like Summertime (8 page)

T
he words
“I want you on top of me” come unbidden to my mind. Instead, I point to the bed. “On your side, here?” I wait for her reply. She sits down on the edge of the bed and rolls, lifting her feet. She lies flat on her back, her big basketball of a stomach lifting up high and round. I laugh at her. I can’t help it.

“Are you laughing at my belly?” she asks, but she’s smiling too. It’s a tired, needy kind of smile, but still a smile.

“I love your belly,” I admit. I’m fascinated by it. I want to touch it and look at it, and… I kind of wish it was mine.

She lifts a brow at me. “You love my belly.” Her curiosity turns into a glare. “Be serious, Jake. I’m like a beached whale.”

I sit down next to her and reach down to touch her belly, but at the last minute I stop because I should probably ask for permission. I can’t just fondle her belly. “You’re getting an outie,” I tell her as I stick the tip of my finger against her belly button. She laughs and grabs my hand. I hold hers tightly. “Your belly button is like one of those plastic timers that come with a turkey.” I wriggle my hand free and poke her again. “Yours has popped.”

She rests the back of her head in the palm of her hand, her elbow pointed to the side, toward my nightstand. “You really know how to sweet-talk a girl, Jake,” she replies. “I’m all giddy with butterflies and shit, because you’re
that
smooth. Your milkshake must bring all the girls to your yard.” She lays a hand over her outie.

Sudden stillness falls over me. “I loved it when Laura was pregnant,” I admit. “I watched her belly every day, feeling to see if it was bigger, making her lie there for me so I could talk to her belly, no matter how big or how small. I kind of miss it.”

Katie lifts her other hand to rest behind her head, and now has both elbows pointed out. “You loved your wife.” Her voice is soft and low, almost like I’m a feral animal she’s trying to catch.

“Yeah, I loved her. Then, even after my feelings for her changed, I loved that baby. I loved the idea of a new life, and I was hopeful that it could fix us.”

“Is there a chance that you’ll reconcile?” she asks. “Have you tried?”

“No, there’s no chance.”

“Are you certain?”

“Positive.” She lifts one hand from behind her head and takes my hand. She places it flat against her stomach. The corners of my lips twitch. “Thank you,” I say.

I really, really wanted to touch her, but I didn’t want to seem like some creeper who gets off on pregnant bellies. I only get off on
my
pregnant bellies, and in this case, for some reason, Katie feels like an extension of me.

The baby bops my hand, and I lift another palm to lie on the other side of her stomach. I realize that even with my thumbs touching, my hands don’t cover all of her belly. “You really are huge, Katie,” I say.

She chuckles which makes her belly bounce. “There you go again with the flattery.”

I let my hand sweep down her side and she flinches and laughs. “Oh my gosh, you’re still ticklish right here!” Then I do it again. She giggles and when I hear it, it’s like falling back in time. “I remember the first time I ever tickled you,” I say. “Do you?”

“Clear as day,” she says. “You grazed my boob.”

“What little bit of boob there was.” I let my eyes fall on the nice rack she has now, which she definitely didn’t have then, and I lick my lips like a total perv. “Now I’d be hard pressed to
miss
your boob.”

She yawns, but talks over it. “Are you just about done groping my belly and ogling my boobs? You promised me a back rub.”

I give her belly a little nudge. “Roll over some, you killjoy. I can’t get to your back if you’re lying on it.”

She tips over, and I brush her hair over her shoulder. “That feels nice already.”

“You always did like having your hair stroked. You want me to start there?”

She sucks in a quick breath. “Would you?”

I don’t even hesitate. I brush my hand down the length of Katie’s hair. She relaxes, her eyes closing. “Nobody has done this for me in a long time,” she says quietly. “Not since the last time my husband was home on leave.”

Time stops. It’s like someone scratched a record in my head. “Would he be jealous if he knew you were with me?” I ask.

She yawns. “No. I think he’d be happy.”

My hand stalls in surprise, but only for a moment, because she reaches back and bumps me, like she’s kick-starting my strokes. I rub her scalp, massaging gently, tangling her hair around my fingertips until it pulls tight, and then I untangle it by stroking down again. She yawns and settles a little deeper into the covers.

“Tell me about your husband,” I say.

“Mm,” she mumbles. “Later.”

“You promise?”

She nods into the pillow, and tucks her hands beneath her chin. “I need to go home,” she mutters.

“Okay. Just let me finish this.”

A soft snore breaks from her mouth and I know she’s asleep. She’s soft and curvy and she’s in my bed and my fingers are sliding through her hair and her hips are so round and perfect and she’s full of life and…she’s asleep.

So I continue, like the total perv I am, soaking up all the Katie I can while I have her here, because I know soon enough that it will be over.

I
wake
up to a dark room and blink my eyes, trying to figure out where I am. I reach behind me, feeling for Jake, but my hand swipes air. The last thing I remember is Jake stroking my hair. I roll to my back and get wrapped up in the blanket someone laid over me.

The hallway light is on, casting a small amount of light in the room. A flash of white on the bed catches my attention. In big, dark letters, there’s a note.

Oh, my God. I left my kids at home while I fell asleep in Jake’s bed. I turn my wrist over so I can see my watch. It’s two in the morning. Tossing the covers back, I get up and stretch. I can’t believe I fell asleep in Jake’s bed.

My back doesn’t hurt nearly as much as it did before I fell asleep. I make a quick stop in the bathroom and then go to collect my computer.

The kitchen is flooded with light and I find Mr. Jacobson at the kitchen table, where he’s putting together a jigsaw puzzle. “Morning, sunshine,” he says. “Sleep well?”

I smile. “I did, actually.” But I wish I hadn’t fallen asleep.

“Good. You probably needed it,” he says quietly. I close my computer and hitch it under my arm.

His voice is soft and not at all like the Mr. Jacobson I’ve known since I was sixteen. Now he’s different. He stares into my eyes, his blue gaze shiny like oysters in a shell. “Is everything all right?” I ask him. Why is he up at this hour?

He nods slowly. “I’m a little worried about my boy.”

“Jake?”

“That’s the only boy I have,” he retorts, sounding a little more like himself.

“Why are you worried?” I pull out a chair and sit down across from him without him even inviting me to do so.

“He’s had a tough year.” He attaches one piece of the puzzle to another, pushing it to make it tight.

“He told me a little about it.”

“Did he tell you about Laura?”

I nod. “A little.”

“He was a mess for a while.”

“He looks like he has it together now.”

He nods. “He’s getting there.” He looks down to put together another piece of the puzzle. “So don’t break him again, okay?”

I lay a hand on my chest. “You think I’m going to break him?” Surely he doesn’t mean that.

“He’s needy right now.”

No, he’s not. He’s just Jake.

“I think you’re needy too.”

I am. I can’t help it. “Do you want me to go?”

He shakes his head. “When your dad called me and told me your situation, I didn’t think Jake would be here, so I didn’t realize there could be problems. Then he saw you, and he immediately had a light in his eyes that I haven’t seen in months. He has a skip in his step, and I’m not worried he’s going to go on a bender again any time soon.”

“That’s good, right?”

“It’ll be good until you leave to go back to your life. Then you’ll break his heart. And my boy has had enough heartbreak this year.”

I shake my head. “I wouldn’t hurt Jake.”

“You wouldn’t do it on purpose. But you’ll do it.”

“I won’t,” I protest.

“You will. You won’t even realize it. Neither will he. But you’ll be gone, and the light in his eyes will go dim.”

“I won’t hurt him.”

He stares into my eyes. “
Don’t
.”

I shake my head again. “I
won’t
. We’re just friends.”

“You need saving, and he’s in the mood to save someone so he can avoid his own problems.”

I get to my feet. “I don’t need saving.”

“I invited you to come here. I wouldn’t have done that if I’d known Jake was going to be here and you’d be…” He looks down at my stomach. “…you’d be like you are,” he finishes. “I thought you were just running from trouble. Not that you’d
be
the trouble.”

“I’m not trouble, Mr. Jacobson.” I stare hard at him, watching for clues. “If you want me to leave, just say so. I can find somewhere else to stay.”

He shakes his head. “I need to keep my eye on Jake. And I’d prefer to keep an eye on you, too.”

I throw up my hands. “I don’t know what you want me to do.”

“When you leave and take all that with you”–he motions from my head to my toes with a sweep of his hand–“take care with his heart, okay?”

“Okay.” I nod. “I will. You know that what was between me and Jake was in the past, right?”

He snorts. “Yeah. Sure. That’s why he’s at your house with your kids so you can get some rest.”

“Jake would do that for anyone.”

He makes another rude sound with his nose. “Jake has been in love with you for eighteen years.”

“Jake was married to someone else,” I remind him. “So was I.”

“But you’re not anymore. Neither one of you.”

I heave a sigh. “I need to get home.”

“You mind what I said, you hear?” He warns me with a look.

“Yes, sir.” I give him a smart salute and start for the door.

“I need a ride to the doctor tomorrow,” he calls to my back.

I turn back and point to my chest. “Do you want me to take you?”

He shakes his head. “No. I asked Gabby to drive for me.”

“Why can’t Jake take you?”

“Jake needs to stay with you.”

“Why?”

“I sometimes get a feeling in these old bones.” He rubs his knee.

A chill skitters up my spine. “What kind of feeling?

He chuckles. “A feeling like Jake needs to stay here with you.” He clears his throat. “You going to let Gabby drive me or what?”

“As long as Gabby’s okay with it, it’s fine with me.”

“She’s a good kid,” he says. He finally smiles at me. “Reminds me of you at that age. Too smart for her own good. Too kind. Too pretty.”

I don’t know if that’s good or not.

“You done good with your family, Katie.”

“Thank you.”

“You done good…until you didn’t.”

I nod, and my throat suddenly closes, and I get choked with emotion. “I’m working on it.”

He turns back to his puzzle and I can tell that I’ve been dismissed.

I let myself out and see the golf cart sitting at the foot of the steps.

Mr. Jacobson opens the door to tell me, “Take the cart!”

“Thank you!” I call back.

“Whatever,” he murmurs. Then he closes the door.

P
op is going
to love this. I look down and wiggle my toes. I have pink toenails. “They’re almost as pretty as Sally’s,” I say.

Trixie smiles up at me from her perch by my feet.

“I can’t believe you let her do that,” Alex taunts.

Neither can I.

Alex stands across from us, tossing the ball. It’s ten o’clock at night, and I’m pretty sure the kids are usually in bed by now, but their mom is still asleep in my bed. The oldest is curled up on the couch reading a book. “What time do you guys usually go to bed?” I ask.

“Whenever we get tired,” Alex says. He tosses the ball into the air again.

I immediately want to blurt out the word
bullshit
, but Trixie giggles, Alex chuckles, and Gabby rolls her eyes every time I say a curse word, so I’m trying to watch my language.

Gabby lays her book down on the arm of the couch and stands. “Liar,” she says to Alex. She motions toward both of the younger kids, in a mother-hen shooing motion. “Time for bed, you two.”

With some moaning and groaning, they walk toward the bedroom, and I hear them shuffling around as Gabby gets them into their pajamas. She comes out a few minutes later. Trixie is right behind her, and she has a book stuck under her arm. She’s wearing pajamas with little fairies on them, and she has on fuzzy, colorful socks that don’t match. “Will you read me a book?” she asks me, standing beside the arm of the chair where I’m sitting.

Gabby motions Trixie toward her. “Bring it here,” she says. “I’ll do it.”

“I want Jake to do it,” Trixie says quietly. She steps over Sally to get closer to me. Then she climbs into my lap, all elbows and knees, and settles with her back against my chest.

Well, okay…

I take the book from her and open it up.

“She knows it by heart,” Gabby says. “Mom reads it every night.”

Trixie turns the page to the beginning of the story.

“I’ve never read this book,” I tell her.

She looks up at me with her bright blue eyes so clear and trusting. “You’ll love it. It’s a really good book.”

“I’m sure I will.” I kiss her on the forehead, just because it’s there, and she settles deeper against me. Then I start to read. I read until she goes soft against me and stops turning pages. I read long after I think she’s asleep, just to be sure she is.

“She’s out,” Gabby says quietly. She gets up and opens her arms. “I’ll take her to bed.”

“I can do it.” I stand up, hoisting Trixie gently in my arms.

“Bottom bunk,” Gabby says.

I take the limp bundle in my arms to the bed, pull the covers back, and settle her. She turns to face the wall, and rests her hands beneath her face. I cover her up, tucking the blankets around her. Then something pushes against my leg. I look down and find Sally with one paw on the bed, like he’s waiting for me to move. I step back and he hoists himself up, spins around once, and settles down beside Trixie. He lifts his head long enough to give me a look like “I got this.” Then he heaves out a huge sigh and closes his eyes.

I look up and find Alex already asleep. His left foot is hanging off the edge of the top bunk, so I poke him gently until he rolls over, pulling his foot with him.

When I go back out to the living room, Gabby has pulled out the sofa bed and she’s already in it. That takes up all the space in the room. I look around, and finally go into the kitchen and fall into a chair. I drum my fingertips on the table, looking at my watch.

I left a note for Katie telling her to sleep as long as she wanted, that I would take care of the kids. Does that mean she’s going to stay until morning?

Gabby pads into the room on socked, whispering feet. “Are you spending the night?” she asks.

I shrug. “Just until your mom gets back, I guess.”

“You can go. I can watch the kids.”

I shake my head. Not after that note I saw on Katie’s computer–the one she never did explain to me. “I’m going to stay.”

“You should go sleep in her room, then. No one is using it.” She gets a drink of water and goes back into the other room.

She’s right. There’s no reason not to go lie down. “Are the little kids going to be okay if I go to sleep?”

She laughs. “You don’t think Mom stays awake twenty-four/seven to watch them sleep, do you?”

I scratch my head. “I guess not.”

“I’ll hear them if they wake up,” Gabby says. “Go ahead.”

“I’ll listen out for them,” I say.

“Mm-hmm,” she hums. But she’s already lying back down.

I turn to walk toward Katie’s room and Gabby calls out, “Hey Jake.”

I spin back around. “Yeah?”

“Thanks for staying,” she says. Then she closes her eyes.

I lie down on Katie’s bed and close my eyes.

It seems like only moments later when the bed dips under the weight of another person. “Jake,” someone whispers.

“Hm?” I ask, but my eyes don’t want to open.

“Jake,” someone says again. Finally, I force my eyes open. I find Katie looking down at me. “I’m home.”

“Good,” I say, and I close my eyes again. “I missed you.”

She laughs, and I feel the covers rustle. “Why are you on top of the covers?”

“It’s not my bed,” I reply.

She touches my arm. “You’re cold.”

“A little.” I rub my face, trying to wake up. “Are the kids okay?”

“I just checked on them. They’re fine.”

“I should go,” I say.

There’s a beat of silence. “Or you could stay,” she says.

My heart stutters. “I could stay,” I whisper.

“It’s late,” she whispers back, and she rolls me over so she can tug the covers from beneath me. Then she covers me with them. The warmth of her next to me seeps into me all over. “You’re so cold,” she says. She rolls over and tugs my arm around her. “Is this okay?”

I pull her back against me, with my hand on her hip. “Yeah,” I whisper. “It’s nice.” I press a kiss to her shoulder. “It’s perfect.”

She wiggles her bottom in my lap and then gets still.

“Thanks for letting me take a nap, Jake,” she says.

I brush her hair down between us and take in the scent that’s all Katie. “You’re welcome.” I kiss her shoulder again.

There’s not one tiny part of me that feels like this is wrong. Not the least little bit. It’s right. It’s Katie. It’s me. It’s me and Katie, and her kids are in the rooms adjacent to this one. I’ll have to wake up early and get out of here before they wake up. That’s a good plan.

I tuck Katie closer to me and close my eyes.