She turned slowly, clenching her fists. “All you proved when you bit me is that you can physically overpower me and you have sharp teeth, just like I proved that I can deliver some serious pain to your groin whenever you use them on me. None of that has anything to do with dominance.”
“
Oh you might want to know that your father and I have arranged the mating ceremony to take place on the next full moon, which is a week from now.”
She couldn’t help but gape. “You know, I can’t work out whether you have selective hearing or just don’t give a shit about a single word you hear.
I do not want to mate with you
. In fact, I would rather have a porcupine brutally shoved up into my rectum than mate with you.”
He shrugged. “I’ve already claimed you.”
“
I don’t accept that claim.”
“
Your father does.”
She shook her head incredulously. It occurred to her that getting angry with this wolf never helped her cause. Maybe if she tried being diplomatic? “What is all this really about? You don’t even like me, why would you want me as your mate?”
“
Of course I like you.”
“
If it’s an alliance with Lance you want, I’m pretty sure you could get it without mating me.”
He looked at her curiously. “You truly don’t see your own worth, do you? I wasn’t sure if it was an act at first.”
“
You don’t need a pack healer, you already have one.”
He folded his arms across his chest. “I’m not talking about your worth as a pack member. I’m talking about your worth as a person, as a female. You’re a very beautiful, sensual, refreshing female. Totally without artifice. You have just as many alpha vibes emitting from you as any other female alpha, latent or not. And as for your iron will…I never thought I would meet a person more stubborn than me.”
So he recognised that she was more stubborn than him and yet they were still having this discussion? She failed to see the logic in that. “Look, you and me…we don’t sing from the same hymn sheets, we’re not even the slightest bit compatible. You need a nice submissive female who’ll say and do what you tell her to and make all the right noises at the appropriate times. Me…I’m just going to piss you off.”
“
You’re right, Taryn, I do like my females submissive. And that is exactly what you will be when we mate.”
And he really believed that, she could tell. “You must seriously be smoking crack.”
He laughed. “The delusional one in this situation is you, Taryn.”
“
I’ll never mate with you. Never.”
His look was sympathetic. “It’s sad that you actually think you’ll win this battle.”
“
It’s sad that you even started this battle. Why would you want me when you know I don’t want you? Why would you want me when you know I’d fight you every step of the way?” The chilling smile he gave her made everything suddenly click into place. “You don’t want me in spite of those things. You want me
because
of those things. You get your kicks out of forcing yourself on women.”
“
No, not forcing myself on them. I’m not a rapist. But I love a challenge, and I love to be in control. Power is a heady thing for me. What greater power is there than to be able to own someone who doesn’t want you; someone whose will you can break bit by bit until they have gone from a spirited, dominant, independent individual to a person who is totally submissive to you?”
It took a few seconds for Taryn to be able to speak. “You’re sick.”
He jiggled his head. “Maybe I seem that way to you now, but just think, Taryn. A year from now you will want nothing more than to please me in every way I want to be pleased.”
“
Never,” she bit out.
“
I won’t need to force you. You will crave my dominance and my direction. I’m looking forward to you moving into my home. Then we can begin your training.”
“
Sick, delusional and suicidal. That’s what you are.”
“
Suicidal?” He sounded amused.
“
I’d kill you before I let you touch me.”
“
You really would try to, wouldn’t you? Even if it meant risking your own life.”
“
If I mated with you I’d be practically dead anyway,” she spat. “Being some little slave for you wouldn’t be a life.”
“
I don’t think I’ve ever met a female who has more resistance to the idea of submission than you.”
“
My resistance is to the idea of submitting to
you
.”
His creepy smile widened. “And that just makes the whole thing so much sweeter.”
Oh he was so very, very, very sick. “It will never happen.”
“
I’ll remind you of this conversation in a year’s time. It will be interesting to know what you make of it then.” With that, he strolled back toward the house, leaving her stood there gaping.
It was honestly like talking to someone who didn’t understand your language. Someone who also had a hard-on for the ‘Lord and Master’ lifestyle and intended to take it to the extreme. Suddenly the idea of taking her chances by just packing a bag right now and leaving the pack to do the lone wolf thing seemed worth the risk.
Four more days until I meet up with Trey
, she reminded herself. In four days she could be free of her father. Moreover, there would be no way that sicko could get near her.
Almost as if her father or Roscoe, or maybe even both, had suspected she was a flight risk, it was decided that evening that her whereabouts for the entire twenty-four hours of each day up until the mating ceremony would be monitored. If she was at home, one of her dad’s enforcers was to accompany her around the property. If she left pack territory for any reason, she was to be tailed by two of his other enforcers. Protection, they called it. Yeah, right.
After only
one
day of being spied on and followed wherever she went, Taryn was more than pissed. She was a bomb waiting to go off. She couldn’t even relax in the knowledge that she had her arrangement with Trey. There was still a chance that it could fall through and she needed a back-up plan.
The constant surveillance had made it hard for her to get into her dad’s office to hunt down her uncle’s address and contact number – even if she didn’t end up seeking refuge with her uncle she still hoped to contact him at some point. Eventually she had found the details, but the cell phone had been disconnected. Fuck it all!
If Trey’s plan fell through, she was prepared to drive all the way to that address and beg her uncle’s Alpha to give her sanctuary.
Maybe
if he liked her uncle
a lot
, he would take pity on her. It would be convincing him not to hand her over to Roscoe or her dad that would be the problem after that. Really, though, what else could she do?
Knowing that she would never be able to come back here no matter what happened, Taryn packed a large dufflebag complete with clothes, passport and a few sentimental objects with the plan that she could stash it in her car ready for Friday night. Unlike the other wolves, she always drove to the club as she was constantly on call in case someone from her pack needed healing.
She didn’t have a lot of stuff, so it wasn’t hard to sift through it and only take the things she really liked or wanted. Her dad had forbid her from getting an actual job that paid wages, wanting her here at all times due to being the pack healer. The only times she ever had money to buy herself things were when he gave her some, which wasn’t often. One thing she had learnt from her mom was the importance of saving money, so at least she had some to take with her.
The problem was getting the dufflebag to the car without her constant companion seeing. She figured that her best chance of making Perry a little distracted was if she seemed the most boring person imaginable. Of course that wouldn’t be enough because she was considered a flight risk. She ensured that she appeared to be angry, but drained of the will to fight, hoping to pass as someone resigned to her fate. So that was what she did.
After another two days Perry became less vigilant and she found a moment to stash the dufflebag in the trunk. Then she busied herself concentrating on what she would do if Trey didn’t appear at the club. She knew she was going to her uncle, but what she
hadn’t
mastered was just how she would do that while being watched so closely.
She figured that her best option would be to disappear in a crowd of people. If she could slip away from the club while her dad’s enforcers were still inside the club, she might have a chance at getting away. She
had
to have a chance. She couldn’t mate with that sicko.
Finally Friday morning came. It had felt more like two weeks than four days. She had remembered what Trey had said about not doing anything out of the norm, but there was one thing she had to do before she left. Her usual visit to Joey’s and her mom’s graves were every other Sunday, but Perry didn’t seem suspicious. Surprised, but not suspicious. Although there was a chance this might seem suspicious to him later, it wasn’t something she could leave without doing.
She went to her mom’s grave first and, as usual, spent a few minutes tidying it up by replacing the decaying flowers with a fresh bunch. Silently she apologised to her for this being the last time she would ever be able to visit and for not being able to have the kind of loving relationship with her dad that she would have wanted.
Her eyes filled as she gave Joey’s grave the same treatment as her mom’s. She then sat in front of it as she silently spoke to him.
Hey Joe. I don’t know how much you guys up there know about what goes on down here, but there’s been some really weird crap going on. Remember I told you last time about that weird-ass alpha my dad is trying to force me to mate with? Well, it turns out he’s also a very sick son of a bitch and my dad doesn’t even give a shit.
There’s this other alpha who’s offered me a deal that would get me out of this, but it means I’d have to mate with him. It wouldn’t be a real mating, because all he wants is an alliance with my dad and it will only be temporary. The thing is…I need to make everyone believe that he’s my true mate, which means I’m going to be telling them that you never were. And I’m so sorry for this, so fucking sorry, but I can’t see any other way out.
People say I must wish I’d never found you if it meant you were going to die before we even had a chance to have the mating bond, but I don’t wish that, you know. Never have. We might not have mated, but we
did
have a bond.
I’m so sorry, but this is the last time I’ll be here. My dad’s not going to let me come back after this, but you can bet your ass that I’ll still be talking to you sometimes. I’ll find a river just like we use to and I’ll go sit there and talk to you. And you better listen, too, Joseph Winters, because you always had a habit switching off when you thought I’d been talking for too long.
You’ve probably switched off now. Okay, it’s fair to say that I’ve been jabbering on.
She stood, wiping the tears from her cheeks, as she said the words she always said just before leaving.
Miss you, love you.
Then, with a heavy heart, she turned away and began walking back toward the pack house. And it hurt so, so bad knowing she’d never be back. It was like there was this huge constriction around her chest that tightened with each step.
“
He was a good kid,” stated Perry.
“
Yeah.”
“
He won’t hate you for mating with Roscoe, you know. He wouldn’t want you living your life alone. And Roscoe’s not a bad guy.”
Deciding that arguing would only make Perry more likely to watch her more closely, she continued with her ‘I’m pissed but resigned’ act.
Knowing that she would never again see the graves of the two most important people to her, Taryn would have spent the next few hours in a gloomy mood if it hadn’t been for her dad’s fantastic news. Roscoe was due to arrive the morning after tomorrow for another visit. That put her thoughts back in order like nothing else could have. Not only did it remind her why exactly she was doing this, but it helped her shove the guilt aside – guilt which had been heightened by how her body and her wolf reacted to Trey.
It wasn’t that she had never desired a guy before, but the desire had never been this intense before. If Taryn had met him under different circumstances she would have most likely ran far and fast from that desire. As much as she had always told herself that she would one day mate, whenever she had gotten involved with a guy she had found herself involuntarily holding back. Although she craved safety, protection, and the type of connection that only mates had it made her hate herself, because she felt as though she was betraying Joey. A part of her knew that wasn’t the case but it didn’t change how she felt. If she ever particularly liked a guy, her instinct was to stay the hell away from him.