Read Fifty/Fifty and Other Stories Online
Authors: Matthew W. McFarland
“
It’s Lily,” she said. “Look, don’t come any closer. I mean it, I’ll do it.”
“
Listen Lily,” I said, as calmly as I could, “I’m just going to come a bit closer so I can see you, and you can see me? Wouldn’t that be better than yelling at each other in the dark?”
“
OK,” she said, “But not too close.”
As I eased forwards the girl came into view. She was holding on for dear life, a white dress with dark polkadots flapping in the wind. As a gust took it, it clung tightly around her heavily pregnant belly. She looked to be about seventeen, with sharp features and long dark hair which was tied back, her ponytail whipping back and forth behind her.
“
Hello Lily,” I said, just loud enough to be heard. “I’m Tom. What are you doing up here?” We are trained to be calm, quiet and reassuring. As far as I can remember, there is no reference to pregnancy anywhere in the handbook.
“
That’s close enough! What do you think I’m doing?” she yelled back at me. “I can’t do this,” she said, motioning with her head towards her stomach. “Not on my own, not now.”
“
Now Lily,” I said, “Just calm down. Every girl gets nervous before it comes. My wife freaked out and phoned an adoption agency on her due date.”
“
Really?” she smiled almost imperceptibly.
“
Aye,” I said. “Apparently the girl told her it happens all the time. They calmed her down, and three days later we had a beautiful baby girl. She’s two now, and she wants a baby brother.”
“
You can have this one,” said Lily, “I don’t want it.”
“
Look,” I said, “Come down and let’s talk about it. I was scared too you know. I thought I would be a terrible father. My dad wasn’t around when I was growing up, and I wasn’t sure I’d know how to do it properly.”
“
So are you a good Dad?” she asked.
“
I like to think so. My little girl adores me, and she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. By a mile.”
“
But you have your wife. I don’t have anyone. What if I can’t do it?”
“
You will do what you have to,” I said, “My mum raised me and my three sisters on her own, and we all turned out OK. Now, why don’t you give me your hand and come down from there.”
“
No! I’m not coming down.”
For the next hour Lily and I talked at length about her situation. The father was a married man and wanted nothing to do with her or the baby. He had offered Lily a large sum of money to keep quiet, but she wouldn’t take it. He had two children to the wife he clearly didn’t love, but Lily wasn’t about to get involved, as the two kids didn’t deserve it. Neither did the wife, really. She already had to put up with a cheating husband.
Lily worked room service in a hotel in South Queensferry, which looked out over the river towards the bridge where she now stood. One night she was taking up an order to a handsome business man in an expensive suit, and he had seduced her. Lily had never had anyone pay any attention to her before. It wasn’t that she was ugly; Lily was quite ordinary in every way if truth be told. But a shyness had followed her around since childhood, and she had gone largely unnoticed for most of her life.
She gave herself to him without any thought to the consequences. One moment they were flirting amiably as she uncorked the wine, and the next it was over. It was the first even remotely reckless thing she had ever done. The second had led her to where she now stood, one hundred feet above the Firth of Forth, a strong gust of wind away from death.
I pleaded with her once more to come down. I could see that she was spent, the simple confession to a stranger leaving her relieved and clear-headed. The anger had left her.
“
OK” said Lily, “But I’m scared, can you help me?”
I edged as close to her as I could manage and held out my hand. As she took it, she screamed.
“
I think my waters just broke,” she said, her eyes wide, tears streaming down her face. It was impossible to know if it was all the emotion or just the wind making them water. “What do I do?”
“
It’s ok, we’ll get you safe, and we’ll sort it out.” I turned to my partner, who had been following all of this. “John, get an ambulance. And give me a hand here.”
We each took an arm and helped her down onto the path between the two railway tracks.
“
You alright love?” asked John. “We’re glad you came down. Try not to panic.”
“
I’m so scared,” said Lily, “What if it comes now?”
“
It will be alright,” I said, “Let’s just keep moving.”
The three of us were making slow progress, when Lily began to scream. She doubled over, pulling us down with her. There wasn’t much room for the three of us on the narrow walkway.
“
Oh god! Oh god, I think I’m having contractions!”
“
We’re nearly there. John, find out where that ambulance is!”
As we got towards the end of the bridge we could see a train in the station, waiting for the bridge to clear. The lights shone down the track towards us. We got Lily onto the platform, but her screams were getting worse, and closer together.
“
Help me!” she said between breaths. John and I were beginning to panic. The passengers on the train were crowding around the windows to see what the commotion was. The doors opened with a hiss, and a young man bounded out.
“
I’m a junior doctor”, he said, “I know obstetrics!” He knelt beside Lily and placed his hands on her belly. “How far apart?” he asked.
Lily screamed at him.
”
Close” I said.
“
OK,” said the junior doctor, “Phone an ambulance, and get some towels or jackets or something. It’s coming. Get her into the train and out of the cold.”
John and I lifted her into the carriage and laid her across two seats. There were only a handful of people there. They crowded round, offering coats and jumpers, and bottles of water. Lily continued to scream, a terrible, heart-wrenching sound that filled the train.
“
It’s coming,” said the doctor, “Push when I tell you to. Now!”
Lily was almost purple from the effort, as the young doctor poked and prodded between her legs. The baby came out with the umbilical cord wrapped around its neck.
“
Come on,” said the doctor, pleading with the baby. “Come on little man, you’re OK.”
There was silence the length of the carriage and Lily’s eyes were wild with fright. Suddenly, there was a cry from the baby, and he began to wail with all his might.
“
He’s OK Lily,” I said, “You’re both OK. See?”
All the pain from just moments before was gone. Everyone there let out a breath as one, the pounding of my heartbeat in my ears receding.
”
What are you going to call him?” I asked.
Lily smiled at me as she clutched her baby to her chest, wrapped in a pale blue woollen jumper. The blue flashing lights of the ambulance bounced around the inside of the train.
“
I’m going to call him Tom.”
Afterword
I
t's funny sometimes, the things that go through your head. Some of the stories in this collection are complete fiction, and some are closer to reality than you might imagine. All of them however, have been fictionalised to some degree, whether to make them more enjoyable, or because that's how I remember them. I guess it doesn't really matter, so please don't get upset.
I would like to thank my parents, for encouraging me to read from an early age, and instilling in me an appreciation of right and wrong. They have taught me so much. Nick, for always being there for me. Carrie, for giving me confidence as always, and for putting up with me and all of my doubt. I depend on her. Sam, for inspiration, unconditional love, and always making me laugh. BC, Dave, Kate, Tina, Gus and Helen for reading early drafts. Joan Carberry, for making me feel like a writer, and making me believe I could publish.
Lastly, I would like to thank you for taking the time to read this book. I hope you liked it.
Matthew W. McFarland,
September 2012
About the Author
M
atthew W. McFarland
was born in 1983 in Belfast, Northern Ireland. After graduating from the University of Dundee with a master's degree in psychology, he took several jobs including delivering mail, producing birth certificates, and working in the heart of the Northern Ireland Government. He currently lives with his young family just outside the city of Belfast. Fifty/Fifty and other stories is the first time his short stories have been brought together in a collection.
Y
ou can visit his author page at Amazon or Goodreads.com.
I
f you liked this book, then please review it and tell others.
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