Fighting Destiny (Central Coven) (14 page)

We walked through the dining room, and saw Anita halfway into a huge waffle smothered in fruit and whipped cream.  We picked up trays and headed to the food.  I picked up cereal with soymilk, fruit, and juice.  Finn chose the same, but with regular milk.  Together we went to join Dean and Anita. 

“Feeling better now sunshine?” I teased Anita.  “Yes thank you,” she answered, oblivious to my sarcasm.  “What now?” Dean asked.  “You two can enjoy an afternoon alone.  We are going to do our own thing for a few hours,” Finn told him, while looking into my face.  “I think we can manage that,” Dean smirked.  “Come on Anita there is something I want to talk to you about anyway,” Dean told her.  They got up, cleared their dishes and left.

“So what are we going to do?” I asked.  “How do you feel about walking through the Japanese gardens?”  “I haven’t been in there yet.”  “You’ll like it.  It is quiet.  There are beautiful trees, a nice creek thing, and rock features.  But the best part is that hardly anyone is ever in there,” Finn hinted.  “Sounds magical.”

“So what brought you into the Japanese Gardens?” I asked, as we continued walking.  “Well, I was walking back to the dorms down the main mall, and my hearing had just started changing.  It was like I heard everyone’s conversations all at once.  First my ears started ringing, then pounding, and finally it felt like they were bleeding.  I had to get away from people.  That’s when I saw the fenced in garden, and my instincts told me to go in, and all the noises stopped.  My head cleared.  But then I saw every mistake I’ve made lately.”

“Was that yesterday morning, before you came to find us at the library?” I asked.  “No, it was the night before.  It was technically closed when I went in, but I found a way inside.  It was a great place to think.

I realized I had pushed you away. I gave you a reason to turn to that vampire.” Finn led me into the entrance of the Japanese Garden, “Well this is it.  What do you think?”  “Wow. How did I not notice this?” I asked amazed.  “I guess with classes and people disappearing you were just too busy to notice it.  Most people seem to ignore it, except on the campus tours.” 

He led the way down a gravel path that winded around a remarkable recreation of a Japanese landscape, hence the name.  I could not name a single plant in the garden, but it was exactly what I would imagine a tranquil setting in Japan would look like.  The water feature ran through the entire garden, and its quiet gurgle hushed the sounds of students milling about on the mall. 

Not that Saturdays were exceptionally busy on campus, but there was still noise when students were present, except in the garden.  It was exactly as he described it, peaceful, a place to collect your thoughts, and to have a quiet moment.

Deeper into the garden we found a secluded corner with a stone bench, shaded by some tall trees.  Finn sat down and motioned for me to sit next to him.  My heart began to flutter.  All of the interruptions that had found us since last night didn’t seem likely to find us in here, and all of a sudden I was anxious.  I knew what I wanted, but at the same
time I was afraid to get it. 

Our first kiss just happened, and afterwards everything fell apart.  What would happ
en this time?  “What’s wrong?” he asked.  “Nothing,” I lied.  He raised his eyebrow at me in a silent question.  “All right that isn’t exactly true.  If you decided you wanted to be with me, what were you doing with the herd of cheerleaders?” 

“I have done a lot of things wrong when it comes to you. We should take things slow.  I don’t want to lose you Chlo, if I can only have you as a friend, I’ll take it.  I want more, but I’ll take you anyway I can have you.” He grabbed one of the long curls that kept falling into my face and tucked it behind my ear.  “I only brought you here to be alone, I’m not one of
those
guys.”  I laughed nervously.  What was wrong with me? 

I didn’t have a response.  I touched his face with my hand, traced the outline of his square, strong jaw.  He grabbed my hand and pressed his perfectly shaped lips to my palm.  I closed my eyes, which felt like they were on fire and would never stop burning.  I opened them, and looked him in his deep blue eyes.  “Chloë, your eyes are green,” Finn said a little frightened.

I looked away quickly.  I’ve never had much of a poker face.  I’m too inexperienced. All of my emotions, and my need for him were so strong, I couldn’t control it, and when I couldn’t control my feelings my magic went wild.  I tried to take a deep breath, but it came out ragged.  “Well it is your fault,” I said with a shy smile on my face.

“Huh?  That’s new, how is your eyes changing color my fault?”  Finn inquired.  “Oh, I really would have rather have kept this from you, its just so…embarrassing.  Did I ever tell you why my eyes change color?”  “No, I didn’t even know your eyes changed colors.”

“They change when I am performing any magic, and since I am a witch my entire being is magic.  When I first got my powers my eyes would change colors every time I had a strong emotion, and stay that way until I got that emotion under control. I have mostly learned to prevent it, except, well, like right now my feelings are a bit, uhm…strong,” I explained.

“Hmmm… Are they going to change back?”  “Eventually.  But one time they stayed green for a month.  It was during the summer, so I had to spend all of my time around other witches and wizards. It sucked.”  “What can I do to help?” he whispered, and kissed me on the cheek.  “Uhmm, I’m not sure that is helping,” I squeaked.  “There is only one way to find out,” he crooned.  Finn leaned toward me and lightly brushed my lips with his.  “I knew you couldn’t hide how you felt about me,” he murmured into my neck.

I grabbed his hair with both of my hands and kissed him as if my life depended on it.  He wrapped his arms around my waist and held me to him.  It was perfect, but it was too much, and I couldn’t control the magic.

The green haze began to circle around us, I let go of him, and began to levitate.  Finn immediately grabbed hold of me again.  “Thank you,” I said astonished.  “For which part?” Finn asked flirtatiously.  “I remembered kissing you felt great, but I didn’t remember it would make me feel like I was flying,” I said teasing.

“Can you stand now?” he asked anxiously.  “Maybe we shouldn’t try until we are indoors.  I would teleport us, but I don’t think my magic is safe at the moment.”  “Don’t worry, I’ll hold you down to earth.”  “I’m going to keep you to that,” I said.  I latched my arm through his and tried to make my feet appear like they were touching the ground, but they weren’t.               

“Well look who has come down off the ceiling,” Anita said amused.  “I’m glad one of us thinks this is so funny,” I replied annoyed.  “What did he do to you anyway?  I mean one little kiss, and you are going to float away like a helium balloon?  Oh, and by the way your eyes still look like some crazy movie special effect.” 

“Anita did anyone ever tell you how reassuring you are?”  “No actually,” she said, thinking hard.  “I find that hard to believe.  What should I do?  I’ve never felt this way before. I feel like I am going to burst into flames.”  “Well definitely don’t do that.  You could, you know, sleep with him.”  I blinked several times in disbelief. 

“I’m sorry, what?  You aren’t seriously suggesting I go to bed with him just to get control over my powers are you?” I asked astounded.  “Come on Chloë be practical.  You are weak now, and as long as you can’t use your powers we are sitting ducks.  You need to figure out something.”  “I agree. I need to figure out something, but I don’t think that is it. I mean really!” “Fine have it your way, but it is just sex.  I don’t see what the big deal is,” Anita ranted. 

“Anita have you…” I began to ask.  “Of course, haven’t you?” “No, actually.” I admitted.  “Really?  Wow, I thought everyone had by now.  Not that there is anything wrong with that.  I mean Dean hasn’t even tried.  Wow, hmmm…” Anita sat suddenly.  

“Anita, your outlook on sex is pretty detached.  If you want to talk about anything, I am here for you.”  “I…uh… don’t really like to talk about it,” she answered quietly.  “It is perfectly okay if you don’t want to, but you can tell me if you do,” I reassured her.

“It is part of the reason I look back on my partying with such disgust.  I don’t know if you picked up on that.  Anyway, I went to a party with a guy who used to be a friend of mine, we had all been drinking, and I had drank too much, as was usual for me then.  My parents had just split up, my mom and step-dad that is. I was acting out I guess.  This guy friend kept pressuring me to have sex with him, and I told him no at least half a dozen times, but he encouraged me to drink more.  I don’t know why I did.   After a while I must have given in, because I don’t remember fighting him off.  I remember enough details of the night to have nightmares, so I know that I wasn’t drugged.  I know if I hadn’t been drinking I never would have said yes.  It was after my encounter with Alexander.  I didn’t have the confidence to stand up for myself,” Anita confessed.

“Anita, what happened wasn’t your fault.  It’s called date rape.  I’m sorry that happened to you.”  “The worst part was after that I didn’t care. I slept with every boyfriend I had, because it really didn’t mean anything anymore,” Anita admitted. “That doesn’t mean it can’t mean something.” “You’re right. Dean is different.  I just worry he will learn about my past and he won’t want me any more,” she whispered.

“That will never happen,” Dean said standing in our open doorway.   “Dean, how did you get in this time.  And you really have to stop walking in here, we could have been naked!” I demanded.  “Well, Anita needs to remember to stop leaving her keys in the door knob.  And, sorry I didn’t consider the state of your dress or undress, but you have to remember Finn and I can hear through these walls. I heard what you were saying and I wanted to talk to my girl.”

“Yeah, okay, but I’m still going to cast a spell on the wall so you can’t hear in here. Is Finn in your room?” I asked.  Dean nodded his head. “Oh, and I don’t recommend having sex to control your powers, especially with an elf who has feelings for you.”

“I wasn’t planning on it, but tell me, why especially with an elf?”  “Elves and shifters mate for life.  Once we take that step we bond to our mate forever.  Witches and vampires are different. You are more like humans with your fickle emotions.  Just remember to be sure before you take that step, because there will be no going back for Finn.”  “I’ll remember.”  I walked outside the door, but I didn’t leave.  I closed the door and put my hand on it so I could see and hear everything going on inside.

“Anita, I love you.  What happened to you, and how you reacted afterward doesn’t matter to me,” Dean reassured her.  Anita cast her face down to the floor.  He grabbed her face in both of his hands, “Look at me, I love you, I will always love you, nothing is going to change that.”

“How do you know already?” she asked him still trying not to look at him.  “You don’t?” he asked hurt.  “Yes of course I love you. What isn’t to love? You’re perfect, but we have only known each other about a month.  How do
you
know already?” “Anita, I knew the first moment I saw you.” 

“Then why haven’t you…you know,” Anita asked blushing.  “Why haven’t I tried to make a move on you other than to kiss you?” Dean finished her question.  “Kind of, I mean, why haven’t you tried to sleep with me?” Anita asked dropping her head down again. 

Dean tipped her chin up, “Anita, I’m not human.  I’m a shifter, and you heard what I told Chloë.  I’ve never been with anyone, and I won’t until you are ready to be my wife.  I’m in this for keeps.  When I say I’ll love you forever, I mean forever.  I want to make sure you understand before we take that step.  Do you?” 

Anita smiled, and put her head on Dean’s chest.  “Now I do.  And I’m good with taking it slow.  Not that I have a problem with being together forever, I just feel like savoring every step.”  “And
now
we are on the same page,” Dean said, and rested his head on the top of hers.  I smiled to myself and lifted my hand off of the door.

I knocked on Finn’s door.  He opened it and moved back away from me. He seemed anxious to be too near me.   “Your eyes are still green,” he said upset.  “Yeah, but at least I’m off the ceiling,” I joked trying to lighten the mood.  “Why don’t you come and sit next to me?” I asked him.  “I’m afraid of setting your powers off again.  I don’t want to hurt you,” he said softly.  There was agony behind his voice.

“You know you didn’t do anything wrong don’t you?  This only happened because I want you so badly,” I admitted boldly.  “Then why not the other times?”  “Probably because the other times I was conflicted.  I knew there was something different about you the first time, and the other night because I felt like I was betraying Grey.  But today I had made up my mind it was you I wanted.  I felt free. I knew what I felt for you, and it overwhelmed me.”

“What can I do?”  “Just help me manage it.  Don’t freak out on me.  I’ll learn to control it eventually, or at least get used to it.”  “I think I can help you get used to it,” he said with his wicked grin returning to his face.  “Finn, what are you thinking?” was the last thing I said before he tackled me to the bed.

He laid next to me facing me, then he seized all of my long hair that we were both tangled in from our fall to his bed and spread it out behind me.  He kissed my forehead, my cheeks, and finally my lips until I could manage not to float away.  “I think I might enjoy helping you control your magic,” he said with a smile.  “I’ll buy you some chap stick,” I replied. 

“Did you hear what Dean said?” I asked timidly. “I did. I’ll be honest with you Chloë, I’m not sure I’m ready for forever yet.  I care about you a lot; I could love you if I let myself.  But we are eighteen years old.  Are you ready to commit to eternity with me?” “I’m not sure,” I answered truthfully.  “For now we take this one day at a time until we are sure, okay?” “I can manage that,” I agreed.  He wrapped his arms around me, and we fell asleep.