Fighting (46 page)

He
pulled back to look at me briefly and then teased my lips lightly with his.  He
ran his lips across my jaw and down my neck as his hand diverted to the button
on my jeans and snapped it open.  He drew the zipper down and ran his face over
my collar bone and breasts.

"You
still like the beard?" he asked, every last remnant of his anger gone.

"Yeah,
babe," I said, almost too distracted to talk.

His
face reappeared over mine and he rumbled approvingly, "Like that."

"You
like what?" I asked breathlessly.

He
considered me for a moment as I took quick, excited breaths and drifted my hand
down his cheek.  "All of it."

He
watched my face and pulled his back when I tried to lift my lips to his.  My
head hit the pillow and his free hand rested just below my belly button.  I
tried to kiss him again but he pulled his face back farther and his hand
slipped inside of my panties and right to my clit in two seconds flat.  My jaw
dropped open and I hastily sucked in a deep breath as my eyes rolled back and
my head dropped to the pillow heavily.  My hands clawed at his shoulders and
biceps as his fingers made my body sing. 

He
dipped a finger inside and cursed, "Fuck, you're soaking wet."  My
eyes refocused on his.  "Love that," he exhaled. 

And
then suddenly, he withdrew his hand.

"No,
no, no, why are you stopping!" I asked frantically.

He
knifed up and flicked his eyes from my pants to my face and said, "Just a
second, baby."

And
then suddenly my jeans were ripped down my legs.  My muscles tensed at the
abruptness of it and he placed his fingers under the hem of my underwear and
looked at me carefully. 

"Okay?"
he asked for permission.

I
licked my lips and bit down on my bottom lip in deliberation for a second
before saying, "Okay."

More
gently, he slid my underwear down my legs and gathered them with my pants to
slip off of my feet.  He tossed them aside and watched as they fell to the
floor.  Then he looked back at me and really
looked at me
.  My legs were
together, but were separated just a little at my ankles, where he sat on his
heels.  His ran sharp eyes over my body from my toes to my eyes and I was
breathing so hard, I was panting.  There was no way I'd trust anyone else like
this because this was the definition of vulnerable.  I was at his mercy and he
could do anything to me he wanted.  His eyes followed my heaving chest and then
lingered between my legs, which he had touched but never seen before.  Sure, it
was really hot, but he was making me freaking nervous.

I
was two seconds away from sitting up and impatiently pulling him to me when he
brought his gaze down my legs and to his hands as he placed them lightly on my
legs.  He kneeled and circled my ankles with his fingers and ghosted them up my
legs while he spread them apart so he had room to crawl toward me.  His eyes
never stayed in one spot for too long, taking it all in.  When his hands
reached my thighs, he slid them inward so they were skating up the inside of my
thighs, pushing them farther apart with his eyes tracking their progress.  I'm
pretty sure I started hyperventilating.

He
bent over me and landed on his elbow by my shoulder.  "You're fucking
beautiful," he murmured.

I
framed his face with both of my hands and kissed him as his hand that was still
on my inner thigh inched upward.  He sliced his fingers through my totally
exposed core and I wrapped my arms around his neck desperately.  He pushed his
finger back inside and pumped it in and out as his tongue caressed mine.  I
lost my ability to kiss him back when I got close, and he definitely noticed. 
He took his hand away again and I almost threatened his life but froze at the
predatory look he gave me.  There was a question in his eyes and this time, I knew
the answer without even having to think about it.

I
loosened my hold on him and ran my fingers through his hair.  "I like it
better when you don't ask," I whispered.  His eyes flashed.  "If I
want you to stop, I'll tell you," I assured him.

I
readily handed over my control on a silver platter with a nice big bow on top,
and he kissed me fervently in response as I reciprocated as best I could.  His
swept his tongue through my mouth and then over the inside of my lips.  He bit
down gently on my bottom lip and then grazed his mouth down my neck and over my
breasts, his beard tickling and stimulating my skin as he went.  His hands
migrated down the bed to rest beside of my stomach as his mouth continued a
path south, and I realized what he was going to do.  My hands gripped the
sheets beside of me and I clenched my teeth to keep from telling him to stop. 
Because I didn't want him to stop, but my nerves were overwhelming.

His
mouth rained gentle kisses all over my breasts, ribs and belly button right
before it dipped down between my legs.  I felt him breathe on me there and my
toes curled and my eyes snapped shut in anticipation.  He bent my legs so my
knees pointed toward the ceiling and my feet were flat to the bed, and opened
me wider.  His hands fastened around my hips as he sliced his tongue through me
just like his hand did earlier.  I was suddenly overwhelmed with need instead
of nerves.  My hips tried to fly upward, but his hands held me down.  He kissed
me several times in various places, all of which felt wildly intimate.

He
slipped in tongue inside of me and I became very vocal, yet not quite speaking
words.  My breathing was erratic and I almost wanted to clamp a hand over my
mouth, but I literally could not release my grip on the sheets, I was holding
on that tightly.

He
eventually focused on my clit and my brain melted.  He sucked on it and after a
few mind blowing seconds of just that, he pushed his finger inside again.  I
cried out helplessly as my entire body jumped around out of my control.  His beard
was adding interesting friction against my skin there and I briefly wondered
what it'd be like if he was clean shaven.  He added another finger and all
thoughts abandoned me as I came.  Hard.

I
pushed the crown of my head into my pillow so my chin was pointed toward the
ceiling and instinctively squeezed my thighs around his face and hand to stop
his movement.  He kissed his way back up my trembling body and settled down
with the side of his face against my belly button and his hands wrapped around my
ribs as we both caught our breath. 

"Yeah,
you like my beard," he said confidently.

"After
that, if you shave it, I'll break up with you," I threatened.

He
laughed softly and pushed up to crawl the rest of the way up my body.

He
raised his eyebrows.  "Yeah?" he asked.

I
jerked his face to mine and kissed the hell out of him.  I wound my arms around
his neck and my legs around his waist, crossing my ankles.

"Anyone
ever do that to you before?" he asked curiously when I relaxed again.

I
shook my head.  "No," I breathed out.

"Good,"
he said, satisfied. 

I
ran my hands through the roots of my hair, noting that I was already hot and
moist with sweat.  He let me catch my breath a moment longer and then tugged at
my lips with his once.  He retreated a few inches to hover over my face and I
heard him pop open the button on his jeans.  He stared into my eyes and gauged
my reaction as he slowly peeled his zipper open.  The sound of it and what it
meant was so sexy that my breathing accelerated again with anticipation and I
clamped my knees against his hips and felt a hint of pressure already start to
rebuild, and he wasn't even touching me.  I was throbbing, practically begging
him with my eyes.

He
was doing what I wanted and acting without questioning first, and it was
another reminder that I'd never been, or would never be, like this with anyone
else.  I trusted him
that
implicitly.

He
sat up on his knees and my eyes automatically dropped to his zipper that was
only halfway opened.  I was about to reach forward and help him but he suddenly
leaned over the side of the bed and tagged our bag.  His hand dipped inside and
when he came back to suspend himself over me, he had a condom.  He held it
between his teeth and used his free hand to push his jeans down his hips.  Shit,
that was beyond hot.  I raised my feet and helped shove his jeans down his
legs.  He put his weight on both of his hands by my shoulders and looked like
he was doing a push up as he flicked his pants completely off.  He lowered
himself down some and I felt him hard against me, skin to skin. 

I
glanced down to see him and my breathing stuttered.  I had only slept with one
other guy before this, so I didn't have much of a scale to measure him against,
but he was big enough that I thought he would probably break me in half when he
slid inside.

But
I knew it'd feel good while he did it.

My
head hit my pillow.  "Fuck," I whispered.

He
tore open the condom wrapper with his teeth and fingers and it disappeared
between our bodies as he slid it on, his eyes burning on mine.  He lowered
himself and hovered over me on his forearms, so we were chest to chest.  He
kissed me and I ran my hands over his biceps and shoulders that I'd been
salivating over since I met him.  He drew his face back and kept his eyes on
mine as he moved his hips closer to mine.  He started to slide inside and he
fluctuated between blinking rapidly and clenching his eyes closed.  I mewled
and his eyes snapped open and pierced through mine.  His hand clutched the side
of my neck and he slid all the way in.  He almost looked like he was in pain
and I was sure I looked exactly the same way; it had been a long time for me.  He
clenched his teeth and held his breath in an effort to keep from moving,
letting me adjust to his size. 

When
I was okay, I framed his neck with my hands and nodded my head. 
"Move," I said.

He
exhaled in a rush and pulled out.  I whimpered and his lips touched mine but
didn't kiss me as he thrust inside.  He did that a few more times before he
built up a slow rhythm and resumed kissing me as we moved together as one. 

I
spent most of my life feeling disconnected and thinking something was wrong
with me because of it.  Right then, staring into his eyes and being as close as
possible, we were the epitome of connected, and not just with our bodies.  We
were almost always on the same page, but at that moment, I felt like we were on
the same fucking letter of the same word on the same page.  Nothing had ever
felt so right in my life as when he was moving inside of me. 

I
kissed him with everything I had in me and pressed my eyes closed tightly.  His
pace increased and he moved his mouth all over my face, skating over my
eyelids, cheeks, forehead and neck.  I kept my eyes closed, even after he
withdrew his lips. 

"Alex,"
he whispered.  I didn't respond except to wrap my arms around his neck. 
"Baby," he repeated slightly louder.  "Look at me," he
ordered.

He
stopped moving and my eyes popped open.  I wrapped my hands around his
shoulders with my forearms pressed against his back.

"What
is it?" I asked.

"I'm
in love with you, too," he rumbled softly.

I
stared at him in awe and stuttered, "I thought . . . "

He
started moving again and appeared to concentrate harder.  "Love you,
Alex."

If
my heart wasn't racing already, it seemed to beat even faster at that.  It was
settled; I was investing in a pace maker.  I laughed in thrilled astonishment
and kissed him senseless, feeling overcome with emotion and unlike usual, not
caring in the slightest.  Reveling in it, even.

I
tracked his movement with my eyes as he thrust into me over and over again.  I
was getting closer, and when he touched his hand to my clit, I threw myself
over the edge and called out his name.  Loudly.  He swallowed my cry with his
kiss as I clenched
everything
around him.  He pumped faster against my
resistance, which got him closer but also intensified my orgasm.  My body shook
under his and he straightened his arms to lean on his forearms and get better
leverage.  I raised my hips and he groaned in approval. 

"Baby,"
he growled.

Not
too long after, he threw his head back and the vein in his neck bulged as he
came.  He pressed his forehead to mine and gasped against me as he thrust
through the duration of his orgasm.  He finally collapsed on me and I wrapped
my arms and legs around him, holding him against me.  

"Shit,"
I panted, overwhelmed.

"I
know," he spoke against my neck.  "Shit."

I
didn't loosen my grip on him until he nudged my arm with his hand and pushed
himself up while simultaneously pulling out.  He suspended his face over mine
and said, "I'll be right back." 

He
kissed me softly and then left for the bathroom.  He came back in the room and
I was partially surprised to see that he hadn't covered himself up, so when I
scanned him, I scanned
all
of him.  My eyes widened as he crawled back
into bed and scooped me up in his arms.  He pulled the sheet to our waists and
brushed my hair back from my face.