Finally & Forever (12 page)

At the fork in the path, something inside Katie convinced her that this wasn’t the right time to pounce on Eli with all this information. She took the trail to the right and headed for the bench in order to have a chance to think and pray alone. Katie knew she could apologize at dinner for saying too much to Eli’s mom. She was good at apologizing for such things.

Until then she had only one strategic thought.

Note to self: Zip your lips. Or else someone here might want to throw you to the crocodiles
.

K
atie had discovered early on that Brockhurst was a haven for many tattered souls. She had come to believe that in a way, she was one of them. Others found their way to the conference center after serving in long and difficult circumstances. The cool air, green lawns, comfortable beds, and extended hospitality of the permanent circle of residents at Brockhurst made this a place of restoration and peace. Katie felt it. Everyone who came on the grounds felt it. She was convinced that God had kissed this patch of Kenyan earth.

The night before the Lorenzos and Katie left for the village to celebrate the completion of the new well, Katie saw firsthand once again what a blessed place Brockhurst was. A hollow-eyed woman with four children stepped into the dining hall and tried to navigate her little flock through the buffet line. Several permanent residents from Brockhurst assisted her, carrying the trays for the young children and directing them to an open table. Katie watched as the children nibbled a little bit of this and that as their mother stared at her untouched meal.

Cheryl entered the dining room and made a straight path to the table with the newcomers. She sat beside the young mother, hugged her, kissed her on the temple, and then sat with her, saying nothing. Every time one of the children would look up at Cheryl, she had a calming smile for him or her and a few gentle words. The woman accepted the steaming cup of comforting chai someone brought to the
table and offered to her. Katie watched as the woman sipped slowly, her eyes fixed and unblinking.

Eli joined Katie at the table where she had been sitting with a couple who had just arrived from Indiana and were waiting for their medical supplies shipment to arrive at Brockhurst before they went to their assigned village in Sudan. For the past few days both Eli and Katie had been unusually busy around the conference center with a variety of tasks assigned to them. They hadn’t had a chance to speak privately for almost a week.

When Eli sat down next to Katie he started chatting with the couple from Indiana about the weather, the banana pudding, and other trivial topics before the visitors decided they would go for a walk before sunset. Since they had their backs to the mother and her children, they hadn’t been watching what Katie was seeing.

As soon as they left the table, Katie asked Eli, “What happened to the woman your mom is with? Are she and her kids okay?”

“It’s not good,” Eli said in a low voice. “They were in Somalia and had to evacuate the medical compound. Callie and the kids got out, but they don’t know where Evan is.”

“Evan is her husband?”

Eli nodded. “Callie used to live here. As a matter of fact, she came here right after she graduated from Rancho Corona. She was my dad’s office assistant for a couple of years and met Evan when he came to Brockhurst on his way to a medical mission trip to Somalia. They got married here and have been in Somalia for almost nine years. We have to pray, Katie. No one knows where Evan is, or if he’s still alive.”

Eli’s words pierced Katie. Being at Brockhurst, she heard a lot every day about what was happening all around East Africa. Some of the reports of drought and disease were terrible and gut-wrenching. But this was the first time Katie had seen the look of true horror and terror.

“Let’s pray for Evan now,” Eli said.

They bowed their heads close, and Eli prayed. Katie silently agreed with him as he prayed aloud. When he finished, she found she
couldn’t add anything else, so she murmured “Amen” and reached for her glass of water. All she could think was,
Africa is not a safe place. I am not safe. I shouldn’t be going to the village tomorrow
.

As soon as that arrow of fear punctured her thoughts, others followed. Katie felt her faith bleeding out all over the conversation she started with Eli. “Do you ever feel afraid that something like that could happen here?”

“Sometimes. Not often.”

“What’s to keep the Kenyan government from having a change of power and ousting all the Christian ministries?”

“God.”

“I know God protects us, but not all the time, right? I mean, isn’t this the country where the US embassy was bombed? How long ago was that?”

“It was August, 1998. We had a lot of people who came up here from Nairobi for refuge that month.”

“Weren’t you afraid then?”

“We were prepared to evacuate.”

“Evacuate to where? Where would you go?”

“The airport was open.”

“What if the airport closed? What if …”

Eli reached over and covered Katie’s hand with his. She felt her spirit calm slightly.

“Do you remember the night we went out to the desert with Joseph?” Eli asked.

“Yes.”

“Do you remember seeing all those meteors and how they were set on a course, headed straight for the earth?”

“Yes.”

Eli’s handsome face had the look of a wise old man, as if he personally held one of the secrets of the ages and he was going to impart that wisdom to Katie. She had never seen that look on him before. It reminded her of his mother’s expression the night they arrived and again that afternoon while they were moving into the new office and
she hugged Katie after their heart-to-heart conversation. It was the look of serenity.

“Katie, any one of those meteors could have come through the earth’s atmosphere and crashed into our planet. But they didn’t. God held them back.” He leaned in closer. “No matter where we live, immense forces are coming at us all the time. The only ones that get through are the ones God allows.”

Katie gave Eli a stern look. It wasn’t that she didn’t agree with him. She did. She’d had those same sorts of thoughts after the night they watched the meteor shower. What she didn’t like was that it was such a hard truth to accept at a moment like this. Her eye was on Callie and her little children as God was allowing a meteor to crash through their lives.

“Katie, look at me.”

She turned her focus back onto Eli. “Don’t be afraid.”

As soon as he said the word
afraid
, she recognized the familiar weapon that had brought on such anxiety before. “I am afraid.”

“I know. You don’t have to be. Whatever happens in your life goes through God’s hand first before he allows it to come to you. Todd taught me that when we were together in Spain, and it changed my perspective on so many things. I know I’ve told you this before, but, Katie, we have to remember that we’re not victims of all the horrible things that happen on this fallen planet. We’re victims of grace. God’s expansive grace. It all comes from him and is allowed by him. Even the terrible and destructive things in life.”

Katie glanced again at Callie. Cheryl had draped her slender arm across Callie’s shoulder like a comforting shawl and was speaking soft words as she made eye contact with each of the four children. Katie thought about how Cheryl had been attacked when the Lorenzos had lived on a medical compound in Zaire. Eli had told Katie about how he had come home from school, found a man attacking his mother, intending to rape her, and how his knife had found its way across her throat.

Eli had arrived at just the right moment, and the attacker lashed out, wounding Eli before the man fled. Both Eli and his mom were fortunate to receive the medical attention they needed to stitch up the cuts.

If anyone knew what terror felt like, it was Cheryl. If anyone here knew what it felt like to be a victim of grace and had earned the right to speak comfort and hope to this young mother, it was Cheryl.

“Are you all right?” Eli asked Katie.

She turned to face him and nodded. “Thanks for what you just said. I needed to hear that. Life seems more intense here sometimes.” She let out a deep breath.

“Speaking of intense, I heard that you had an intense conversation with my mom a few days ago.”

“Yeah, I was going to tell you about that. I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?”

“I said too much. I told her about the list you were making for your job description.”

“You did? You talked to her about that?”

“Yes. Didn’t she tell you?”

“No. She told me the two of you talked about you and your role here.”

“We did. I wouldn’t say that part of our conversation was intense, though.”

Eli’s eyes had narrowed. He lowered his voice and asked, “Why were you talking about my position? That’s something I need to work through with my dad. We haven’t had a chance to sit down and talk about it.”

“That’s why I’m trying to apologize. I realized immediately I shouldn’t have said anything. I’m sorry I did.”

Their eyes were locked in a searching gaze. It seemed to take Eli a few moments to let go of his frustration. He drew in a breath and said, “It’s okay. Don’t worry about it. I need to get things settled with my dad. You didn’t know that we haven’t talked yet.”

“Thanks for the grace, Eli.”

He gave her a half a grin and seemed to pick up on the fact that she chose to use the word
grace
after the points he had just made on how God is ultimately in control. “It’s probably a good thing that you brought it up with my mom. I need to talk with both of them. Hopefully I’ll have time to do that tonight.”

“So, does this mean I didn’t completely ruin your life?” Katie asked with a hopeful expression.

“Not yet,” he answered with a straight face.

Eli nudged her with his shoulder and she nudged him back.

“I feel like I haven’t seen you in weeks,” Katie said.

“I know. It’s been wild around here.”

They were both quiet for a moment. “Are you ready for our long drive to the village tomorrow?” Eli asked.

“No, but I will be by the time we leave in the morning.”

“I can’t wait. It’s been a long time since I’ve been to a village. I’m eager for you to get a feel for what it’s like. I think it’s going to become clear to my dad once we’re there that that’s where I belong.”

Katie paused. “Wait. Are you saying you see yourself living in a village? Full-time?”

“I wouldn’t mind that. Would you?”

“Me? I don’t know.” It hadn’t occurred to Katie that Eli’s ultimate aspiration might be to live permanently in a village. When she allowed herself a few fanciful peeks into their possible future, she pictured them in their own cottage at Brockhurst. Visits to the village would be side trips every few months. How did she miss this significant piece of Eli’s dream for the future? His future and possibly their future.

“Are you saying you haven’t considered living in a village? Seriously?”

She wasn’t sure what to say. She countered with a question of her own.

“How about if you ask me again after I’ve actually been to a village? I’d like to go have a look around and check out a few mud huts before I give my final answer.”

Eli still looked surprised at her response but he nodded slowly and said, “Do you think this is fear stuff again that’s making you feel uncertain?”

“No,” she said decisively. “It’s big-picture stuff, Eli. I mean, this is all new to me. I’ve never been to an African village before.”

“Okay.” He held up his hand before she got ramped up. “I understand.”

“Good.” Katie leaned back and folded her arms. “I’m glad you understand, because maybe I’m the one who needs to understand better. What exactly do you see yourself doing? In the villages, I mean. Would you be on a permanent team that goes around and digs the wells?”

“No. There’s a lot more to the projects than the digging crew. The mission receives tons of requests for wells. Someone needs to go to each village, assess the need, and outline the steps required, because it’s different for each location. Then someone needs to do extensive hygiene training so the original problems that polluted the water source don’t reoccur.”

Eli pushed his plate aside. “The other thing I’d like to do is work with the teams that come to Kenya to help. In some of the locations, it takes weeks to carry in the rocks, sand, and other components before the well can be built. It does no good to bring people over here unless they have an idea of what’s going to be required of them. And they need someone to keep them on task once they arrive in the village. It’s a lot more complicated than just digging a hole in the ground and installing a two-ton pumping system.”

Katie knew that. She just didn’t understand until now that Eli saw his position requiring extended stays and going from village to village.

“What about you?” Eli asked. “Can you see yourself being involved in that sort of work? Helping in the villages?”

“I don’t know. I mean …”

She didn’t want to say anything like, “Where you go I will follow,” because obviously she demonstrated that by following him to
Africa. But was she ready and willing to follow him to the villages for extended stays so she could haul cement up dirt trails?

Katie also knew she didn’t want to sound like his dad, pressing Eli to set up a desk in the new office and stay in the Brockhurst bubble. If Eli was created to live in the villages, then that’s what he needed to pursue.

“I don’t know what to say. I’m trying to figure out where I fit and understand what it is that you want me to do. It’s not all clear to me yet.”

Eli leaned back. “Then you and I need to talk about this.”

“Yes, we do. Actually, there are several things we need to talk about.” She glanced over her shoulder to make sure none of the other people in the dining hall were listening to them. “When can we do that?”

Eli glanced at his watch. “Maybe tomorrow. On the way to the village.”

“But your parents will be in the car. We need to talk privately.”

“Then let’s try to talk once we get to the village.” He got up and reached for his plate. “Do you want anything else to eat?”

“No.” Katie couldn’t believe he was walking away from her. She knew he had a habit of taking small portions to begin his meal, as if making sure there was enough for everyone, which there always was. Then he went back and took more if he was still hungry. He usually only took more of one thing, which was whatever he liked the most at that meal. Katie watched the back of his head as he went back toward the buffet. She tried to wrap her mind around the thought of living in an African village. What if there was unrest? Would Katie end up like Callie one day? Huddled at a Brockhurst dining room table, her children looking like waifs as they waited for news of Eli’s well-being in a wild, remote village somewhere?