Finding Eva (Sophia Noire Series) (8 page)

Read Finding Eva (Sophia Noire Series) Online

Authors: H.D. Thomas

Imagining James reading my note that I left on his mirror with my lipstick breaks my heart. I am sure he is pissed.

I can’t wait to talk to him and make him understand I had to do this.
I just hope that in doing this—I didn’t lose him.

Scenarios play out in my head of him telling me that I betrayed him by leaving and that it’s over between us. Similar scenes haunt my thoughts as I lay on my bed after talking with Gabi. I told her that I need to get some rest after staying up all night with James. She didn’t dig any further and retreated back to her room. Now I am alone and I can’t stop worrying about this mess.

What if James doesn’t love me anymore after I left him? What if Lily isn’t there? What if Lily is not there and James blames me for not finding her? What if Gabi and I are stuck here forever, or worse, what if we get caught?

These thoughts plague me.
With my stomach in knots I try and relax thinking about it all working out.

I picture James and I together living happily ever after. We go on trips and explore the world together. I get to visit my dad’s grave finally and have him meet James. I can show James where we lived and cook him and Dobbs a traditional Polish dinner with my mom’s amazing recipes.

I see Gabi free from this nightmare. We often talk about what we would do if we got out of here and she always went back to about getting a salon of her own.

I
can imagine Lily living at her brother’s house, recovering lost time and memories. She and I become fast friends and we hang out, act like normal girls, and go to Gabi’s salon to get our hair done.

My daydreams make me even more determined. I am going to make this work. Jame
s will understand. He loves me. I refuse to doubt that again.

I close my eyes and remember last night. He is the most amazing man. I have never felt the way I did with anyone else. I think about his bed and how his spicy
scent filled my senses when I wore his shirt last night. It makes me feel safe and sleepy and I drift off into a deep slumber.

I wake to Alexi standing over me. “Wake up, Sofa. Time to make some more money. Get the fuck up and get ready. You have an hour.”

My eyes snap open and I know that this is it. It is coming down to tonight. We are going to get out of here. For good.

“Okay
, Alexi. Thanks.” I am nice as pie to him knowing that I soon will never have to deal with him again. Never have to hear him call me
Sofa
again.

“Uh huh. Whatever.” He grunts and walks out of the room.

I need to see if Gabi is going with us tonight. I hope that James took the hint and asked for her
, too. We talked about her night but I don’t know if he connected the dots.

“Gabi, are you going with me tonight?” I am wringing my hands nervously and I notice the grim look on her face.

“Eva
, you are not going to see James tonight. Felix is surprising James and just sending me alone. I think that your plan backfired. What did you tell him?” Gabi looks miserable as she tells me this.

My heart has stopped and I have lost all feeling.
If I am not seeing James tonight, where am I going? Oh shit.

“Earth to Eva. What happened?” Gabi is insistent.

“My plan was for us both to see James tonight so I told Felix that he mentioned he would like to have two girls next time and that he liked Latino girls.”

“Well
, sweetie, it didn’t work. I am so sorry. I overheard that you are seeing some big-shot from New York.” Gabi shakes her head and gives a low whistle.

“Oh.” It is about all I can manage to say.

I hold back my tears and think of how good this is for Gabi. She will be safe now. At least she is getting out of here. That helps me recover from my disappointment but only slightly.

The thought of seeing another man tonight and not being with James chills me to the bone. The thought of being with a strange man has always been tough but now...
Eva! You stupid, stupid girl!

I will betray him more than ever now. Breaking my word and coming back to help find Lily would have been forgivable
, but this...I don’t think so. I am ruined. At least there will be two happy endings. James will find Lily and Gabi will be free.

“It’s okay. Please tell James that I am sorry and tell him what you know about Lily. I love you
, Gabi. Thank you for everything. Can you pass him a note for me?”

“Sure, anything for you girl. I love you too.” She laughs lightly and doesn’t understand that soon she will be free.

I give her a quick hug and go back into my room and flop on the bed. I have got to hold myself together. I will end up making this worse for myself if I don’t.

Sitting down I grab a magazine and find a page that I can write on.

James,

I am so sorry that I am writing this note instead of seeing you.
I know that you must be angry with me. Please forgive me. I couldn’t see you in pain and I know that finding Lily will bring you such joy and happiness. After 10 years of searching for her, you will finally find her.

Gabi is my best friend in the whole world. I had to come back for her. My plans didn’t work out and now she is coming to see you while they send me elsewhere.

Know that I never meant to leave you like this. My plan was to get information from Gabi and bring her with me to you to help you find Lily.

She knows the area Lily is in and the different ho
uses you can search. I know you, Gabi, and Dobbs will bring Lily home. This knowledge brings me peace.

Please keep Gabi safe for me. I don’t want her coming back to this hell. She deserves better.

I don’t know what will happen to me once Gabi and Lily escape so that is why I am writing this good-bye letter. I think my fate is sealed now but I can’t look back with regrets. My heart is happy knowing Lily and Gabi are safe.

Know you own my heart and soul completely. Nothing can take away my memories and love for you.

Tell Gabi th
at she needs to open her beauty salon and help her to get started. She is an extension of me so please take care of her.

Again, I am so sorry this didn’t work out as I had planned. I love you more than anything.

XOXO, Your Eva

I fold up the note with tears streaming down my face and walk across to Gabi. Fingers trembling, I hand it to her.

“Please give this to James. It’s personal so don’t read it, okay?”

Gabi looks at me with affection, trying to cheer me up, saying, “Sure, my friend, don’t cry. It will all work out, Eva. I am so sorry.”

She takes the note but keeps hold of my hand, squeezing it tight. “ I doubt anything will happen if he is so in love with you,” she says, smiling wryly, “He will probably be pissed.”

Although I know Gabi means well, I shake my hand free and say, bluntly, “Yeah. Sure. Bye. Thanks for everything.” She looks startled, and I soften and give her a hug and then have to peel myself off of her.

I know that it is the last time that I will ever see her. The pain is intolerable.

I turn back into my room to get ready and to try to pull myself together.

The last thing I hear from her as she walks down the hall is, “See ya later, alligator.”

I know that she is trying to cheer me up but it doesn’t work.

“
After while crocodile,” I whisper under my breath.

Saying my farewell feels like the last nail in my coffin and I know this can’t be it.

I cannot survive without Gabi. I cannot live without James.

What am I doing? I need to get out of here. But how?

I am meeting t
his new guy at the Nines Hotel—not so far from James at The Benson. It’s time to make my move.

I
t is time to bet big and go all-in.

Looking around my room, I know this will be the last time I will see this place. I decide to poke around Gabi’s room, taking a few things she may miss.

I place the only picture that I have of my parents in my purse along few other items that may come in handy tonight.

Scanning the room, I am surprised to feel a wave of nostalgia overcoming me. Why would I feel even a bit of remorse at seeing this prison for the last time? Feeling this way enrages me and I want to scream.

Closing the door to my room firmly symbolizes that they don’t own me anymore. The sentimental feeling dissipates—replaced by a glimmer of hope.

I stride down the hall with my shoulders back and my head held high.

Perhaps I will get my happily ever after.

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Edited by Lynn Klobuchar & Garry Egan

for Multistar Media Publishing