Finn (21 page)

Raven’s breath hitches, most likely thinking about the fact that Declan and his sisters lost their mom as teenagers.

“She has a terrific Dad and brother, but she still had to navigate through life without her mom’s advice and influence. Then another tragedy hit, and she is now taking on the responsibility of helping with Winnie. She works, she volunteers, she carpools and plans princess parties.

“More than that, though, she has the ability to brighten my day with one glance. One brush of her hand against mine, or one small smile, and my heart swells.”

I suck in a breath, trying to calm my temper and look around to see tears running down each girl’s cheeks. Even Charlie is crying openly.

“Why the hell would you even talk about the shit in the past? She doesn’t need to know the dirty details. Paris was ours, Raven. OURS! No one else’s. I know everyone has questions and theories of what happened, but I’ve never discussed it because there’s nothing to discuss.” I throw out my arms and point to our friends, who are watching with wide eyes and open mouths. Only a few people know exactly what happened: Declan, Robbie, Raven, and me.

At the time, it hurt because I do love Raven. But I didn’t have a clue what being ‘
in love
’ felt like, until Presley.

“And since now you’ve brought our business into the open, let’s clear the air. Declan fucking hurt you repeatedly as you figured your shit out. I was there every step of the way. Who knows what would have happened if I didn’t send you home to him. But I can honestly tell you, I’ve never given it a second thought. You were happy, and that’s all that mattered! I put your needs and love above my own. How could you do this to me? The woman I’m crazy about left here over seven hours ago because of you!

“You think she’s using me? For what exactly? Why couldn’t you be happy for me? I’d never in a million years expect this from you. I thought you wanted me to be happy. I told you to give her a chance. She’s an amazing person. She’s perfect for me! You know what that’s like! How could you?”

She starts to bawl, and Declan gives me a harsh look before tucking her to his chest. But I’m not done, snapping my head to the audience.

“You all knew? All day? We spent hours on that fucking river. What is wrong with y’all?”

“Man, we just heard. Tripp and I are with you. Let’s head back to Nashville.” Max tries to pull me away as my phone rings. Presley’s name flashes on the screen, and I move quickly out of reach.

“Baby, let me explain.”

“I wish I could.” Reese’s tone is flat. “I’m letting you know we’re okay. I figure by now you know what happened.”

“I found out about five minutes ago.”

“I’m not sure what to tell you, but we’re safe. Presley is hurt, extremely hurt. It’s not my place to say, but she’s crazy about you. Hearing how much you loved Raven did something. Finn, I think it’s best you stay away until you get that handled. Being in love with a woman you call your best friend is something every girl dreads. Presley is fragile…”

“Reese, I’m coming to her now. It’s not what you think. This is a misunderstanding.”

“Don’t come tonight. I’ve got her in bed, sedated with tequila.”

“It’s only seven.”

“Don’t judge us, Finn Black! She’s hurting, and that means I’m hurting. You’re a prick.” She slurs her words.

“I’ll be there soon, Reese. Tell her I’m coming for her.”

“Finn, you don’t get it. We’re not at home. I’m giving you a courtesy call, letting you know we’re fine. When I hang up, her phone’s going off. It’s up to her if she ever talks to you again.”

The line goes dead, and I drop my head. I have no way to trace her out here. By the time I get to a secure wi-fi, it’ll be useless.

“Ready?” Max brings my bag.

“No. She didn’t go home. I have to think this through. Raven did damage.”

“Shit, I’m sorry.”

“Me too.” I glance back and see all eyes on us. “On another thought, you up for a ride? Maybe we can—”

“On it, brother. I’ll stow some stuff on our bikes and we’re out of here.” He walks away.

Robbie, Gabe, Jimi, and Tripp come to me.

“Ember is in fucking knots. She’s called Presley several times,” Robbie tells me. “I’m the one who suggested Presley use that bathroom this morning, and I forgot to mention it to anyone. I don’t know what to say, except everyone, including Raven, feels horrible. Declan wasn’t happy with your rant, but he took your side. Raven isn’t herself.”

“Appreciate it, brother, but I’m gone.”

“Finn, don’t leave. This was a mistake.”

“Robbie, if Ember was in this situation, what would you do? She doubted your love, your devotion, your commitment, and it was all because of us, the people you trust more than anything. Everyone out here is family, and yet, my girlfriend was treated like a piece of shit.”

“I’d fucking go ballistic.”

“That’s about how I feel.”

“Can you give it ‘til daylight? I’ll go with you, but I’m not leaving Ember alone tonight.”

“No, I’m out.”

“Wait!” Raven comes running toward me with her hair flowing and her blue eyes shining. I am so pissed, it’s hard to stay still.

“What do you need?” I ask impassively.

“I’m so sorry, Finn. I had no idea how much she meant to you. You’ve never been serious before.”

“RJ, you may have fucked up the best thing in my life. I’m done. If she gives me another chance, I’ll be lucky.”

“I’m—”

“You’re sorry, I know… heard it already.”

I rev the bike, drowning out any of her protests. She looks at me with hurt and confusion, but it doesn’t stop me from riding away, Tripp and Max close by.

I know exactly where we’re headed. After today’s revelations, I’m getting drunk.

Presley

F
rom the window, I watch my last neighbor drive away and crank up the music, trying to drown out my thoughts.

Talkin' to herself, there's no one else who needs to know...

She tells herself, oh...

Memories back when she was bold and strong

And waiting for the world to come along...

Swears she knew it, now she swears he's gone

I place my violin on my shoulder and play along. My bow moves across the strings at a rapid pace as I lose myself in the song.

She lies and says she's in love with him, can't find a better man...

She dreams in color, she dreams in red, can't find a better man...

My hand strums to the beat, trying to catch up. Focusing on the music, I let a few tears fall as Finn’s voicemails replay through my mind.

“We need to talk…”

“It’s not what you think…”

“Please call me back…”

“I’m coming to you…”

When I listened to the last message, I turned off my phone and hid at Reese’s apartment until this morning. It was obvious Finn had been here because of the flowers leaning against the wall and the note that lays unopened on my table.

I force myself to focus and start over as the song starts again. After two more tries, I’m physically exhausted from the concentration of learning the beats and tempo.

When I open my eyes, I scream and drop my violin on the floor. Tripp, Declan, and Ember are standing in my living room, staring at me in wonder.

“What the hell?” I scream.

“Sorry, babe. You didn’t hear me knocking.” Tripp sits next to me and picks up my violin, placing it on the coffee table.

“So you let yourself in?” I wipe my damp cheeks and try to stop my lips from quivering.

“Come here.” He pulls me to his chest.

“What are you doing here?” My voice is muffled in his shirt.

“I knew it was bad, but had no idea it was ‘Better Man’ bad.”

“It’s a great song,” I defend.

“Presley, we don’t know each other well, but you do realize I’m a career musician, right?” Declan raises an eyebrow.

“Of course.”

“So you probably know that I’m familiar with actual music, including the great Pearl Jam. That song has several interpretations, including abuse, longing, and searching for love. Under no circumstances do any of those apply to you, and you don’t need to search for love because you’ve already found it.”

“We’re ending this shit,” Tripp announces.

I stiffen. “What shit?”

“You have to talk to him. He’s a fucking mess.”

“I’ll talk to him, but I need time.”

“No!” Ember interjects. “You don’t need time… time is evil. It causes uncertainty and makes people do crazy things. I know from experience.”

“No offense, Ember, but I’m unsure why you’re here at all. If I remember correctly, you had the opportunity to stick up for me. During Raven’s diabolical rampage, you were quiet as a mouse.”

“I regret that every day,” she replies sadly.

I look at Declan, who is eyeing me with sympathy. He runs a hand though his hair and bites on his lip ring nervously. “I’m here because I lived through what you think you know happened. Finn Black is one of the best men I know, and he’s hurting. My wife, who is my fucking life, messed up. She’s devastated, and I don’t do well with her hurting.”

“Guys, I appreciate your allegiance to Finn, but—” I sit up, disengaging from Tripp’s hold.

“There is no
but
in this scenario. Tell us what’s going on in your head so we can help work through it.” He looks at me with determination.

I think about blowing them off and throwing them out, but don’t have the energy. Dodging Finn and trying to heal the wound that Raven caused is exhausting.

“I don’t blame him for loving her. She’s beautiful and fun. But her words and insinuations cut deep, and I’m not sure I can be with him under her scrutiny. She’s one of his best friends. They have a long history.”

“It pains me to say this, but that woman in the camper Saturday morning was not the Raven we all know. She doesn’t have a malicious bone in her body. She wasn’t thinking clearly, and she’s jealous.”

“Jealous? What the hell about?”

“She’s jealous of you, Presley,” Ember says softly. “She’s always been the baby girl to the group. Her bond with Finn is incredibly close.”

“I had some major fuck-ups in our relationship, and Finn was always there for her,” Declan adds. “When he met you, his entire world took on a new focus. She was crushed that he didn’t tell her himself. When she realized how much you mean to him, she lashed out in an unkind way. This isn’t about you. It’s about her feeling left out of his life.”

I take a second to let his words sink in, searching for my own response. Then something in me cracks and anger bubbles to the surface. Before I can stop myself, I leap up and start pacing.

“Let me get this straight. From the first time I met her, she’s made me feel unwanted and low-class. She accuses me of using Finn, insults my life, and indirectly insults my allegiance to helping raise my niece. All because Finn didn’t tell her he had a girlfriend? That is the most immature, greedy, selfish, callous, infantile, pitiless, self-centered, egotistical, narcissistic, BULLSHIT I’ve ever heard! Grow the fuck up!”

Declan growls as Ember drops her head. Tripp rubs his hand over his face, covering his mouth, but I catch his lips twitching.

“Be careful what you say here, Presley. I understand you’re upset, but that’s my wife you’re slashing apart. It’s been a year of change for us.”

“For fuck’s sake, Declan. I know all about your year of change. Finn’s told me about the mansion you bought, the arrival of your perfect and healthy children, and the postponement of your tour to stay home. I also know about your mammoth support system and the unwavering amount of love and friendship. I don’t discount that twins can be a challenge to new parents, and the shifts in your life can throw you off-balance.

“You know how I know that? Because I hauled my ass to North Carolina at twenty-two years old to help my brother raise his daughter. The same fucking brother I buried in the ground almost two months ago!”

The three of them stare at me in shock, and Tripp’s smile disappears. Then there’s a shift behind me, and their eyes go over my shoulder. I know he’s here; I can feel him in my bones, but I’m too wound up to stop my tirade.

“For three days, I’ve cried, screamed, doubted every minute I spent with Finn because of her disapproval. She made me feel like a lecherous reject out to sink my invisible talons into her precious best friend. Get over it!”

I suck in a deep breath, stop pacing, and will my racing heart to slow down. Never in my life have I ever been so brash.

“See, my girl’s vocabulary can get colorful when she’s pissed.” Finn comes to stand beside me. “Think it’s time you guys left.”

Ember looks like she may argue but nods and walks over, throwing her arms around me. “No one thinks you’re a lecherous reject. In fact, we think you’re amazing. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Remind me to never piss you off.” Tripp leans in with a quick kiss on the cheek. “I’m not sure about a few of the words you used, but it was totally hot.”

Declan comes to stand in front of me, his expression remorseful. “Please accept my apologies for Raven’s behavior and making you feel so unwelcome. We’d like to get to know you better. The sacrifices you’ve made for your family are honorable. Finn’s a lucky son of a bitch. Don’t be too hard on him.”

They walk out, shutting the door and leaving me with Finn. The enormity of what I just did comes crashing down, and I sway as my knees buckle. Finn’s in front of me in a flash, picking me up and sitting us on the couch.

“Oh my God, I can’t believe the things I said. That was the mother of all hissy fits.”

“Like Tripp said, it was hot.”

I drop my head as mortification creeps up my back. “That was psycho. I’ve never lost my temper like that before. How embarrassing.”

“Look at me.” He gently tilts my head up, giving me no option to hide. “That wasn’t embarrassing. That was passionate, and it was also true. When I walked in and heard you, it gave me hope.”

“How long have you been here?”

“The whole time. I was already here when they drove up. Hid around the corner and watched them let themselves in. Pretty sure Tripp saw me, and that’s why he left the door cracked.”

“You were here? How’d you know I was home?”