Authors: Tera Lynn Childs
My duty, my responsibility. My destiny. It’s only a kiss away.
It would be so easy just to lean forward a few inches, press my lips to his, and vanquish al my doubts and guilt forever. So easy…
An image of Quince flashes in my mind.
I can’t.
Just because something is the easy choice does not make it the right one. Quite often the right choice is real y, real y hard. I’ve made my decision. I love Quince and I believe my future lies on land. I’m not about to throw al of that away to avoid snide comments from girls like Astria or to wash away guilt that Daddy has assured me I don’t need to feel.
“Tel in,” I say, pressing a palm to his chest to push him away, “I can’t. I have to make my own choices in life, or it won’t be my life.”
“Damn it!” Tel in slams a palm against the wal so hard I feel the vibrations—quite a feat under water. “Lily, you can’t do this. You’re going to ruin everything.”
“What?” I have never seen that kind of fury in his pale eyes. “Ruin what?”
“You have no idea,” he says, his voice a rough growl. “My kingdom…” A look of complete desperation washes over his face. “We’re dying, Lily. With the rising ocean temperatures, the coral in our kingdom can’t survive. It’s disrupting the entire cycle of life in our waters.” I suck in a gasp. I knew that ocean warming was a worldwide problem, that the mer kingdoms had been in talks for years about how to combat the effects. But I didn’t know any kingdoms had been so dramatical y affected already.
Thalassinia has been lucky in its more northerly location.
We’ve seen new species migrating into our waters, but so far that’s only been an interesting sea forestry study. Down in the already warm waters of the Caribbean, in an ecosystem so entirely dependent on the coral reefs, I can’t imagine what Acropora must be going through.
“I’m so sorry,” I say, even though I know it’s total y inadequate.
“Sorry,” he scoffs. “Lily, my father isn’t il , he’s dying. My people are starving. I haven’t been living on land because I want to. I’ve
had
to. Many of my subjects have been forced to either leave the waters or emigrate to other kingdoms.”
“That’s awful,” I say, cupping his cheek in sympathy. “But I don’t see how bonding with me—”
“You don’t see?” he spits. “Uniting our kingdoms is the only hope. With the strength and prosperity of Thalassinia comes the salvation my people need.”
“But—” I shake my head. “Our bonding would not unite the kingdoms. You said it would be a bond in name only, so I could take the throne.”
“You are either very naive or wil ful y blind,” he snorts. “And selfish.”
I have no response to that because, wel ,
am
I being selfish? I can’t tel anymore.
“You have doubts,” he pleads. “I can see you do.” He floats down and lays his head against my bel y. “For the love of your merkin to the south, I am begging you.” This is so much to take in. The fact that he’s been lying to me about the bond. The famine and ecological destruction wiping out his kingdom. So much emotion. It’s a lot to process, and the only thing I know is I am not the solution. I can’t be. Right?
Thalassinia is a prosperous and wealthy kingdom, and we are very generous with those less fortunate, but we don’t have the capability to support an entire second kingdom.
Especial y one as large and diverse as Acropora.
Tel in’s hopes for a united kingdom are unrealistic.
“Tel in, I’m very sorry for your kingdom’s suffering,” I say, feeling helpless. I gently wrap my arms around his shoulders. “But bonding with me won’t—”
“The hel it won’t,” he growls before suddenly kicking upward until his face is level with mine. “It’s the only option we have.”
His abrupt movements are such a surprise, his lips are nearly on mine before I react. I twist to the side, dislodging his body, and—with a flick of my fin—I’m out of his arms and in the center of the room.
He doesn’t chase after me. He just drops his head against the wal . His shoulders are heaving and I think he might be crying. Sobbing.
“Tel in…” I swim back toward him, overcome by sympathy.
Maybe I should be angry, but desperation makes people do uncharacteristic things.
“Don’t. That was unforgivable.” He shrugs off my hand on his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Lily. I am so sorry.” I take a deep breath. This is my friend speaking, not the desperate king of moments ago.
“I understand,” I say, floating to his side. “You are worried about your kingdom.”
He looks at me, his pale eyes bleak and lost. And glittering ice blue. “I’m worried that, if things don’t change, there won’t be a kingdom much longer.”
So much pressure on one so young. No wonder he tried to take such drastic action. To find out that your father is dying and your kingdom might be, too? That’s a lot to deal with.
He shouldn’t have to deal with it alone.
“Have you spoken to Daddy?” I ask. “Or to the other kings and queens?”
The mer kingdoms are al unique and sovereign nations, but we are joined by a common secrecy, a common heritage. We try to protect and help one another out as much as we can.
“My father wouldn’t let me,” he says. “Too proud to ask for help.”
I know that pride is a powerful emotion, but it is also a terrible indulgence. Especial y when the fate of your kingdom is at stake.
“Your father is not in charge at the moment.” I take Tel in’s hand in mine, showing my support. “You can move beyond his pride.”
“You know,” he says with a sad laugh, “that’s why he stopped speaking with your father. Because King Whelk refused to sign the arranged bond agreement for us. My father can’t stand the thought of being denied.” Wel , at least that makes more sense. I couldn’t real y see Daddy wanting to arrange a marriage for me, not since he’s been so adamant that I fol ow my heart.
I shake off my annoyance at Tel in’s father. “You need to cal a council of kings and queens,” I suggest. “Present them with your situation, and I’m sure you wil not walk away without numerous promises of assistance.”
“You are too generous,” he says, squeezing my hand.
“Fletcher is a lucky man.”
“I like to think so,” a new male voice says.
I spin around so fast, Tel in is pul ed in my wake.
“Quince!” I squeal. Then I’m across the room, throwing my arms around his neck and peppering his face with kisses.
“Such a shame,” Doe says, drifting in after Quince. “I was hoping to ruin your party like you ruined mine.” She sighs.
“Looks like I brought the guest of honor instead.” Ignoring Doe, I scream, “You’re here!” I squeeze him tight.
“What are you doing here?” Then I suddenly realize just exactly where
here
is, and I say, “
How
are you here?” With a smile, Quince pul s my arms from around him and twists—awkwardly, because he’s stil in human form and stil not the best swimmer—and shows me his neck. There is a black circle of waves tattooed at the base. The outer portion of the mer mark.
I am completely overcome with joyful, tearful emotion.
“Daddy found you?” I manage.
“Actual y,” Daddy says, swimming up next to Doe, “your cousin found him. I merely performed the ceremony when she brought him to me.”
I glance, teary eyed, at everyone in the room. My squid-brained cousin, who’s turning out to be not such a horrible young mermaid. My darling daddy, who found a way to bring me and Quince even closer together. My adored Quince, who is wil ing to accept al the craziness that comes along with life with me.
“We have something to talk about,” I tel him, trying to sound stern but knowing that my glittering eyes and huge smile undermine the effect.
“I know,” he says with a matching smile. “I acted like an ass.”
“Wel …” That takes a lot of the steam out of my lecture.
“Okay. As long as you recognize the fact.” He flashes me a wink. “Always.”
“You know, daughter,” Daddy says, swimming over his desk and sinking into the massive chair behind it, “it is nearly midnight.”
Oh, no.
My heart starts beating flipper fast. I’ve been anticipating this moment for weeks now—sometimes eagerly, sometimes less so. But I’ve known it was coming. Now that it’s here, I’m a little (a lot) freaked out.
“Mangrove and I have drawn up the papers.” He pul s a few sheets of kelpaper from a drawer and sets them on top of the desk. “They only require your signature.” I swim up to the desk, painful y aware that al eyes in the room are on me. Daddy hands me a pen. I didn’t expect it to happen this fast.
“Right here.” He points to the line where I’m supposed to sign. Where, with one curl of ink on paper, I’l renounce my claim to the throne. Forever.
This is what I want, I remind myself. To be on land, with Quince and Aunt Rachel and lip gloss and mediocre sushi.
The squid ink–fil ed quil clutched in my fingers, I move my hand over the paper. Over the line.
Hovering.
My entire body freezes, like Peri when a jel yfish floats by.
I can’t move a muscle. My brain is racing. Is this the right decision? Easy or hard, is this the best choice for my future, for the future of Thalassinia and of Acropora and the other mer kingdoms?
I have never felt so completely paralyzed by doubt.
Eyes wide, I seek out Quince, my rock. He’s floating between Doe and Tel in, watching me calmly, betraying no emotion. When my gaze flicks to Tel in and back to Quince, his look shifts. Like he’s bracing himself.
Then, in a moment that’s just between us, Quince nods.
I don’t need to voice the question I know he’s answering.
Our connection is stronger than any formed by a magical bond. And always wil be.
Without giving myself time to think about the situation, I drop the pen, jet myself across the room with one powerful kick, and grab Tel in by the shoulders. I only have an instant to register the pure shock in his eyes before my lips brush his.
oly bananafish, what did I do? My brain freaks out for a Hsecond—okay, more than a second—not quite believing what my heart just told me to do.
But my brain quickly catches on. This is about more than love and col ege plans and a black-and-white decision between living on land or becoming queen. There is a huge, Pacific-sized gray area where I can choose both.
And I just did.
Holy bananafish!
The shock of my spontaneous decision sends gal ons of adrenaline pouring into my bloodstream. While I take a few deep, calming breaths to regain a normal pulse, I take note of the room around me. The people around me.
Tel in blinks, like, forty-seven times.
Daddy shouts, “What have you done?”
Doe shrugs and stares at the ceiling with a bored expression.
Quince watches me seriously, silently, with his mouth drawn up into a smile on one side. He’s not thril ed with the kiss, of course, but he supports my decision. I can tel . And it’s a huge relief.
Since Daddy is the only one actively questioning my actions, I say, “It’s the right thing to do.” I share a solemn look with Tel in. “In more ways than one.”
“Are you sure this is what you want?” Daddy asks after the two minutes it takes him to get over his shock. “There is stil time to perform a separation, if you—”
“No.” Though my decision was rash and instantaneous, I’m not racked by any feelings of regret. Actual y, I’m relieved. The doubts that have been plaguing me for the last few weeks are instantly gone, tel ing me I made the right choice. “I am Thalassinia’s princess, and I cannot cast aside that responsibility for selfish reasons.” Daddy’s gaze shifts to Quince. “And you have no objections?”
“Sir,” Quince says, floating to my side, “I am stil a stranger to this world”—he takes my hand—“but I know your daughter. I believe she wil be the best possible kind of ruler. I love her and wil always support her choices in any way I can.”
Daddy nods at Tel in. “And the bond?”
Quince squeezes my hand. “Our love is stronger than a bond,” he says with the kind of certainty I’ve come to rely on. “If this is what it takes for Lily to remain in line for the crown, then this is what we have to do.”
I squeeze his hand back. The best part of what he said?
We.
We are in this together, like the inscription on his birthday gift, forever. Who could ask for a better boyfriend?
Although this does mean I’l probably be hearing a supersized I-told-you-so about the giving-up-my-crown bit.
I’m okay with that.
“Guys, I know this is a lot to take in,” I say. “But I need a minute alone with Tel in.”
Daddy shakes his head, as if he stil thinks I’m a little insane. He’s probably right, but that doesn’t mean I made the wrong choice. In time he’l see it’s the only decision I could make.
“I’m going to enjoy the party before al the candy-coated sand strawberries are gone,” Doe announces, continuing her bored attitude.
“Dosinia,” I say before she disappears out the door. When she looks back over her shoulder, I say, “Thank you. For finding Quince. And other things.”
I can’t come out and thank her for the earthquake and the plot with Tel in, but we both know that she had a lot to do with my final decision.
She shrugs. “Whatever.”
I catch sight of her smile before she swims out into the hal .
“I’l see you downstairs?” Quince asks.
I give him a solid kiss—just in case he or anyone else in the room has lingering doubts about my decision. “Wait right outside.”