First and Last (27 page)

She’s right. Gary would probably smack me upside the head and tell me to man the fuck up if he were here right now. I squeeze my eyes shut, making a silent vow to myself, to Gary, and to Mia that I’ll try harder. I’ll do better and be the husband Mia deserves. Because I know she doesn’t deserve a worthless, piece of shit who yells at her about dinner and breaks glasses against walls. I nod my head and look at her. “Okay, I’ll try. I can’t promise I won’t fail, but I’ll try.”

The corners of her mouth twitch. This conversation has been a slight buzz kill and the sobering effects make it easier to pick up on the smaller facial gestures. “I’m glad.” She presses her lips together and I can tell she has something else to say. Her hands cup my face as she peers into my eyes. “And if you won’t or can’t do it for me or for yourself, do it for our baby.” She pauses, making sure what she’s said has sunken in. My mind is working slower right now, but I could’ve sworn she said something about a baby.

“Wh-what?” I blink rapidly trying to process all of this.

“I’m pregnant,” she whispers. “Three months.”

“I’m going to be a dad?” My eyes widen as they fill with tears.

“Yes. We’re having a baby,” she replies with a nod.

“Holy shit.” I grab her and pull her onto my lap as I hold her for dear life. “I can’t believe it.” My ear is to her chest, listening to her strong heartbeat. The same heartbeat that keeps our baby healthy. I stare at her flat tummy that protects and nourishes our baby. Placing my hand on it, I rub my thumb back and forth over the fabric in astonishment.

“You see,” she says gently as she strokes my hair. “There will always be tragedy in life, but we have to look forward to our blessings. This is our blessing, our reason for living.”

“I already had my reason for living, Mia. I have you. I guess I just lost my way a little. I’m so sorry, babe. I’m sorry I let you down.” I tighten my hold on her, amazed by her patience and strength. I know I haven’t been easy to live with these last few weeks, but she’s been strong in her silence and tolerance.

“Just come back to me, Blake.”

“I will. I promise.”

December 2009

“I’
m so excited,” Mia says, practically vibrating on the table. We’re at her doctor’s office to find out if there’s a boy or girl inside Mia’s round belly.

Sitting in the chair next to her, I hold her hand and rub the top of it with my thumb. “I know; me too.”

Mia stares up at the ceiling while reclined on the table. She’s beautiful as I take in her profile and admire the glow this pregnancy has brought out in her. My love for her is indescribable at this point, and we’re about to see the result of that love on the monitor next to us shortly.

“Alright, you guys ready to see your baby?” the technician asks when she enters the room.

“Yes,” Mia says quickly, revealing her eagerness. I smile warmly at her, loving her excitement.

After the technician squirts some gel stuff on Mia’s belly, she takes out the probe and runs it through the gel across her stomach. Seconds later, an image appears on the screen with our baby’s profile. The last time she had an ultrasound, the baby was too small to make out any major features. But now, I can clearly make out the outline of its nose and mouth. I’m in absolute awe.

The technician points out the arms and legs as she takes various measurements. After a while, my attention turns away from the monitor and toward Mia. She stares, unblinking, with a small smile on her face. I wish I had a camera to capture this moment. There’s such serenity and joy radiating off her face and I can’t tear my eyes away from her.

“Do you guys want to know the sex of your baby?” the technician asks.

“Yes,” we say in unison, my eyes still focused on Mia’s face.

“Okay, let’s check around here.” There’s a pause before I hear, “It’s a girl!”

I wait for Mia’s expression and am so glad I do. Her face lights up and her mouth opens as her eyes fill with tears. I lean over and kiss her cheek before resting my forehead against the side of her face. “A little girl,” I whisper. “We’re having a little girl.”

She nods, unable to speak past the emotions. I pull away and look at the screen, knowing I’ve never loved someone I’ve never met so much in my life.

“Babe, I’m huge and it’s not dark enough in here,” Mia whines as I come up behind her in the kitchen and kiss all over her exposed neck. My hands find her hips and grip them. My only complaint about Mia’s pregnancy is that it’s made her self-conscious about her body. I don’t know why. I think she’s more gorgeous now than she ever was before.

Spinning her around, I scoop her up and carry her to our bedroom. Enough of this self-doubt shit. She will see herself the way I see her.

“Blake, what are you—”

“Shhh,” I say, cutting her off. I set her down in front of our bed. “You’re fucking gorgeous and I’m going to prove it to you. Now take your clothes off and let me tell you what I see while you undress.”

She hesitates and stares into my eyes before sliding her yoga pants down her legs and stepping out of them.

“I see long, toned legs that I dream about being wrapped around me. Legs that I love to run my hands up and down.” Sitting in a chair in the corner of the room, I lean back and get comfortable. “Turn around for me and take off your panties.”

She swallows and I know this is hard for her, but she complies and slides her underwear down her perfect legs, which exposes her ass and center as she bends over to remove them. My dick springs to life instantly.

“I see an ass that I can’t get enough of. One I could stare at as you walk all damn day.” I pause to take another long look and appreciate the vulnerability she’s giving me. “Now face me,” I demand gently. “Remove your shirt.”

Crossing her arms, she reaches for the hem and lifts up, leaving her naked except for the black bra she has on.

“I see a round stomach that possesses the most beautiful thing of all; our child. In it is the greatest gift anyone could ever give me. You complain about weight gain and stretch marks, but all I see is love. Our love for each other is growing another human inside you that is changing your body. Those changes are fucking amazing, Mia. They’ve not ruined your body, they’ve enhanced it.”

She looks down and bites her lip. I know I’m touching on all of her recent insecurities, but she needs to understand how beautiful she is.

“Get rid of the bra.”

Her eyes come back up to mine before she reaches behind her and unclasps it, letting it fall from her arms to reveal her tits.

“I see full breasts that I constantly stare at and have to restrain myself from touching. They’re amazing and I can’t get enough of them, but they’re just like the rest of you. Utter perfection.” Her eyes soften and become glassy. “Now lie on the bed and let me love on you.”

Turning around, she crawls onto the bed and props herself up on the pillows against the headboard. I get rid of my clothes at warp speed before joining her. “You’re beautiful, Mia. Please, believe me.” She closes her eyes and nods as if it’s hard for her to hear.

My lips find her neck, kissing over her pulse point and feeling the acceleration of her heartbeat. Making my way up, I seal my mouth over hers and pour all of my love and affection into it. She accepts every bit of it, allowing me to mold her lips the way I want, the way I need.

My hands feel her soft skin and memorize her fuller curves as they travel over her body. When I reach the apex of her thighs, I’m not surprised to see that she’s already wet. Stroking over her clit in small circles, her head goes back on a moan.

“That’s right, baby. Feel what I’m doing to you. Forget your insecurities and take everything I want to give to you.”

With eyes closed, her back arches, which pushes her full tits and stomach into the air. When I know she’s close, I slide down and replace my fingers with my mouth.

“Oh, shit!” she yells from the sudden change in sensation. A second later, she’s coming hard, her legs clamping around my head.

I lap up every drop she gives me before I sit up and see her dazed expression. A smirk spreads across my face. “Ride me, babe. I want to watch you.” We lock eyes for a second, communicating without works like we’ve done our whole lives. Switching spots, I lie on my back and wait for the show. She swings her leg over me and lines my dick up with her opening. It throbs in her hand, waiting for her to lower herself onto it.

Slowly, she moves down onto me, and I have to fight to keep my eyes open. It feels so damn good. She moves her hips in a circle then rises up and down in slow, fluid movements.

“Just like that,” I say, my voice strained as my grip on her hips tightens. It’s not long before I snap and I can’t take the slow pace anymore. Meeting her thrust for thrust, I slam up into her as she slides down.

“Yes! Oh, God!” she yells up at the ceiling, her orgasm close.

“Come for me, Mia.” If the moans and shouts of pleasure don’t give away the fact that she’s coming, her body clenching around my dick does. “One more,” I tell her.

“I can’t.” She slumps over on top of me in exhaustion.

“Yes, you can.”

I help her roll off of me before guiding her into the position I want by lifting up her pelvis and pushing down on her lower back until she’s on all fours. My dick lines up behind her and enters in one thrust, which causes her to gasp. My rhythm quickens each time I completely sheath myself into her. Staring at her perfect ass, I have to hold back from blowing my load.

My hand pulls back and gives her a swift smack to one cheek, causing her to jump in surprise and moan in pleasure. Soon, I lose control and ram into her with wild abandon, spurred on by the sounds coming from her. When I don’t think I can hold off any longer, Mia is coming and I’m right there with her. When I’ve got nothing left, I pull out of her, lie on my side, and pull her to me.

Both of us are breathing hard, our bodies sticky from sweat, but neither of us cares as I hold her to me. “You’re stunning and I don’t want you to ever forget that,” I say quietly into the comfortable silence.

“I love you,” she responds.

“I love you more.”