Flicker (46 page)

“You ought to,” Rodney acknowledged mildly. “But you won’t.”

Filo’s hands dropped from Rodney’s shoulders. He stepped back, swallowing. “Why did you send me to the school? You knew what would happen. And you did it anyway.”

Rodney tilted his head curiously. “You considered me your friend.”

“I did.”

“That flatters me.”

“Screw you.”

“If it’s any consolation, I also considered you my friend. I still do.” He knit his brow, thinking. “How do you say? ‘No harm intended?’ I wanted to give you a challenge, Filo. It was all in good fun. Truly.”

Filo stared. When it came to humans and human nature, Rodney often displayed a certain level of mystification. It was only natural; after all, he belonged to another species. But, though he was undoubtedly not human, Rodney had never seemed to be
inhuman
. He’d never shown the casual cruelty so common among faeries. Until now.

Did Rodney truly not understand? Had he even considered that Filo might’ve died for his moment of fun? And, if so, had he decided it was worth the risk?

All of a sudden, Filo
couldn’t breathe. He
felt like he’d been kicked in the chest.

“Dammit!”
Spinning angrily away from Rodney, Filo
slammed his fist into the brick wall
—once, twice, three times
. Blood burned his knuckles. “Dammit! Dammit!” He leaned against the wall, staring down at his hand. He tried to flex his fingers, and winced as sharp, hot pains lanced through his hand.

“I did not desire this,” Rodney told him gently. “Really. I was only passing by. Then you were in the window, and you spotted me. I couldn’t resist.” He exhaled through his nose. “I don’t know precisely what I
did
want. Perhaps to see how you were faring.”

By then, Filo’s ears were buzzing. He shook his head
in disbelief
, cradling his injured hand
.

“I’m sorry, Filo.” The way Rodney said it, he sounded almost genuine. “It’s in my nature. I couldn’t help it.”

Filo turned, only to find that Rodney was gone. He was alone.

* * *

Byrony blinked her eyes open, and stretched her many slender limbs. The wood encasing her groaned softly, the tips of her branches quivering in the pale morning light. Rain misted over her sparse leaves and along her trunk.

Becoming one with a tree was easy for Byrony. She was a dryad; trees were her home. They provided
shelter for sleeping, hiding or healing. With their many eyes, trees were
excellent vantage points for spying. Just now, Byrony was viewing her surroundings from every angle at once: more oak trees, paths winding over yellowed grass, stone fountains.

Beyond her tree,
the city stirred.
Human sounds
were
starting
to fill the air.

With practiced precision, Byrony reached inside herself. She sorted through the energies within the tree, separating herself from the rest. Byrony felt her body draw togeth
er again: arms, legs, wings
. The tree’s thoughts drained from her mind.

Drawing a heavy gl
amour around herself, Byrony
slipped out of the tree. The earth was cold beneath her bare feet, but still welcoming to her. Hands clasped, Byrony offered the tree a small bow and a quiet word of thanks for its hospitality. Then, shivering slightly in the damp air, she turned and hurried from the park.

“But where did he go?” Lee asked.

Nasser shook his head. “I don’t know.” There was that nagging itch on his brain again, the one that let him know
something
was happening, though he couldn’t tell what. “He was looking out the window, and then he just ran out!”

“But can’t you feel where he is?” Lee inquired.

“It’s not that simple.
All this rain has
been throwing me off
for days
. And unless someone’s fairly close,
it’s hard
to pinpoint a loca
tion. He feels far away
.”
“W
hat—h
e’s out of range, and you’re getting interference?” Jason asked dryly.

Nasser frowned. “Can you not say it like I’m a piece of machinery?”

Lee paused. “Can you tell what’s happening with him?”

“I don’t ha
ve a bad feeling
, if that’s what you mean
. He was upset
, but I think he’s all right.”

“I’m sure he’ll be back soon.”  Biting her lip, Lee glanced toward the window. “Maybe someone should sit outside for a while. Keep a
n eye out for Filo. I’ll do it,” she volunteered
immediately
.

“But—” Nasser started.

“I know. But Nasser,” she assured him, before he could even voice his fear. She grabbed the cord that hung around her neck, drawing it up so the locket dangled before her face. “I’ve got this. She can’t sneak up on me. Besides, I’m going crazy, cooped up in here.”

Nasser opened his mout
h to protest, but it seemed safe enough. She
could
come
inside if anything seemed amiss. She had the necklace. And besides, he didn’t have the authority to order her around. He couldn’t tell her what to do, only make sugg
estions
.

He sighed. “Just be careful, okay?”

Beaming at him, she gathered up some things and hurried into the stairwell.

“Something tells me,” Jason
drawled
, the moment she was gone, “that you wouldn’t have reacted that way if I’d told you
I
was going to hang around outside.”

“Of course not,” Nasser said immedia
tely, without thinking.

Jason snorted. “Figures you’d let your girlfriend wander off, but not me.” He
scowled
. “You’ve known her how long? Two weeks?”

“I can’t believe you’re trying to start this right now.”

Jason just shook his head in disgust. “Do
you honestly think you can
act like nothing’s the matter and I’ll go along with it? I’m not a
child
, Nass.”

“I don’t want to talk about this right now.”

“That’s the problem
! You never want to talk about
anything
.
Not Mom, or Dad, or this damned dryad—nothing that bothers you
, because you’re so determined to keep all the
burdens
for yourself
.
You w
on’t share the load with anyone. Do you really think that
helps
anyone?
” Jason’s eyes were bright. “How can you call yourself my brother when you won’t even
talk
to me?”

“Jason—” he began, unsure of what to say.

But Jason wasn’t in the mood for excuses. His brother
spun on his heel and stormed into the bedroom, slamming the door shut behind him.

Nasser jiggled the handle, but it was locked. He didn’
t bother trying to open it with magic. “Y
eah, Jason, this is the best way to demonstrate your remarkable maturity,” he snapped.

“
Just say it, Nasser!” Jason yelled, his voice slightly muffled through the door. “
For once in your life, say
something.
Why do you have to treat me like I’m some kid you’re babysitting?”

“
Because I can’t replace you!
” Nasser
shouted
. His thr
oat felt raw and tight and hot.
His heartbeat pounded in his ears.

When
Nasser
lived at
Flicker
, he’d taken care of Jason, Filo and Alice. He was barely older than they were, but he
had to be more than a brother or a friend—he
had to be a parent, too.
He made sure they ate and bathed and went to bed on time. He sat up with them when they were sick, and soothed them back to sleep after nightmares. He saw to it that their injuries and their clothes were always patched up.

H
e had to be calm and comforting and patient, for their sake, even when
it was too
much,
even
when
he felt like he was falling apart.
He buried his fear
,
anger and pain.
Whenever they asked what was wrong, he did his best to smile reassuringly and promise that he was fine.

But now he felt as if something had broken open inside of him. All those emotions he’d
so carefully
sealed away were spilling out.
The words clawed up Nasser’s throat like frogs or spiders or other ugly things better left hidden.

“It
’s not that I don’t respect you.
It’s
not that I don’t trust you.
I’m trying to
protect
you!”
He slammed one fist against the wall. “
You’re the only brother I have, Jason
. I don’t want y
ou to have to worry
, and I don’t want you getting mixed up in
anything dangerous if I can help it.
You think I wouldn’t treat Filo and Alice the same way if I could? Jeezus, Jason, I’m your
big
br
other. I’m supposed to take
care of you, but you won’t let me.
”

Nasser’s eyes burned, and he felt suddenly like he was going to start cry
ing
. “You can’t ever just take me at my word and leave it alone
,” he said, trying to mask the cracks in his voice. “Y
ou punish me
instead
. You take off in the middle of the night, and ditch me to get trashed with a bunch of half-breeds
at Chimeric. You can’t
make
anything easier for me, can you
?
”

Suddenly weary, Nasser turned and leaned against the door.

No sound came from the bedroom.
Even now, Jason was p
unishing him.

* * *

Lee scratched industriously at her sketchpad with a stubby gray pencil. She had set up beside the front door of Flicker, where the eaves of the building sheltered her from the misting rain. Beside her lay a stack of sketches drawn on loose sheets, weighed down by a large, round stone she’d found in her backpack, which she’d taken outside with her.

“Hey,” said a voice. “You’re pretty good.” When Lee glanced up, her gaze was met by a pair of large, hazel eyes.

A petite girl stood over Lee. Her clothes—a heavy jacket over a long purple sweater, faded cords and boots—we
re too large for her
, and her mouse-brown hair was cut very short.

“I’m sorry?” Lee asked.

“I said you’re pretty good.” The girl nodded toward the stack of drawings. “Mind if I have a look?”

“Go ahead.” Something about this girl prickled Lee’s memory.

The girl sat on the concrete beside Lee. She leafed through the drawings, pausing to examine each one. “I’m Alice, by the way, Alice Whitethorn.”

“Lee Capren.” She extended her hand, but Alice didn’t shake it.

“How much do you want for this?” Alice asked, holding up a sheet.

It was a sketch of Filo. She’d drawn it in charcoal, except for the eyes, which were colored using a combination of blue pencils. Lee had carefully added all the little details: the cuts and bruises, the dusky black eye, the scars. Despite his injuries, the Filo in the sketch looked relaxed, almost handsome.

“I don’t know,” Lee shrugged. “
Whatever
you want to pay, I guess.”

Alice paused for a moment, then dug through her pack, eventually coming up with a square of powder-blue paper. She quickly folded the square into a complicated-looking origami flower, and offered it to Lee. “Fair trade?”

“More than fair.” Lee took the origami with reverence. “This is beautiful.”

“I could say the same about your drawings.”

“Thanks.” Lee grinned, but not at Alice’s compliment—at least, not entirely. So
this
was Alice, she thought. For a girl to turn up outside of Flicker, a girl who shared both a name and a talent for crafts
.
…
It couldn’t be just a coincidence.

Alice looked up from the drawing of Filo that she held. She had small, thin hands. “Do you have any other sketches of this boy? He looks like an interesting subject,” she added quickly, in response to Lee’s questioning look.
Lee thought she heard faint traces of an Irish accent amid Alice’s speech, like the one that sometimes seeped into Filo’s words.