Forest & Kingdom Balance (12 page)

She cleared her mind and looked to the stars. The
night sky has always filled her with an expansive sense of wonder,
tonight it was enough to settle her emotions and let her assess the
day’s events objectively. Her flame brightened as she relived the
joy she felt at seeing Dionara in the Forest for the first time,
“This is as much her home and heritage as the
Kingdom.”
She thought, then felt laughter bubble up from
within as she recalled putting aside duty for a brief time to run
free with Foil.
“What a wonderful
creature.”
She made a mental note to stock up on beetroot
for him.

“You’ve avoided it long
enough,”
she chided herself,
“let’s see
where we stand.”
She had to admit that even though the
councilor’s fears were growing, she knew that they would follow her
instructions. Her frustrations resurfaced as she recalled their
questions, the subject and tone of which had spoken volumes.
“Perhaps we should wait for the Caretaker before we decide on a
course of action,” and “John is a warrior, what are his
suggestions?” Their not too subtle dismissals of her rank and
abilities had cut deep.

“Uneducated, narrow minded! Okay,
calm down.”
She released her anger. “
The
greater the threat, the more people will revert to instinct over
reason.”
She reminded herself, and had to admit that none of
them have had the opportunities to experience and learn from the
wider world that she had been given as a Forest Dweller and
Sentinel. She understood that their lack of knowledge was a gift of
peace from their forbearers and the Caretaker.
“Their peace has a price though, one that this generation
must pay. There’s still a chance,”
she allowed hope to
brighten her flame,
“that only a few will need to
pay for all.”

To that hopeful end, preparations were well
underway. She reviewed the training that she and John had been
giving the selected Royal Guard Elite. They were ready, honed to a
fine edge. She was confident in their skills and abilities even if
the Councilors felt that they were not enough to meet the
threat.

Her energy waned once more as she recalled
explaining the situation to them for the umpteenth time. “If the
Red Knight chooses to bring an army across the mountains, there is
nothing anyone could do to stop him. Our only recourse would be to
pack up and move east, or scatter. In either case the Red Knight
would follow to our eventual undoing. That is the worst case. We do
not feel it will come to that. We’ll know more within a month. Even
if the worst case becomes reality, we’ll have years to prepare. The
Red Knight would not be able to gather, equip, and lead an army
across the mountains to the Kingdom until he gets reinforcements
from the Far Lands.”

She recalled the looks of despair on the Councilors
faces. “Please, have faith,” she encouraged them, “it is our belief
that the Red Knight will take a small expeditionary force into the
mountains to gain information. He suspects that something is here,
but he knows nothing of us. Selected Forest Dwellers as well as the
Royal Guard Elite are now prepared to meet him.”

“The Red Knight is immortal and has never been
defeated.” The councilor’s fears had not abated. “Even if we win a
brief victory, he will return with an army. You have never
addressed that part of the plan. Should we not begin arming the
entire Kingdom now? Shouldn’t we leave while we can?”

“No!” Catherine remembered the vehemence with which
she said that one word. “We have been given a great gift, to turn
tail and run merely because that gift is threatened would be to
disgrace the generations that preceded us, and would prove us
unfaithful to the power that made our happiness here possible.” She
regretted her outburst immediately, she felt as if she had slapped
a child. Even though it was hours later and she was safely home in
the Forest, she still felt that sick feeling of regret well up in
her stomach.

“Please have faith and patience, there is still
hope, all depends on Dionara’s potential.” She could see the fear
and trepidation clearly written on their faces.

“Finally, home.”
She looked
down to see light from the window and smoke from the chimney. Since
the Caretaker had made it home before her, she thought that at
least today had gone well in the Forest.

Changing back just outside the front door, the cool
night air suddenly chilled her nude form.
“Oh!”
She quickly opened the door and reached for the
robe she kept just inside. Her teeth still chattered a bit as she
looked around the room for the comfort of her lover.

All she found was a young woman in her late teens
sitting cross-legged on the floor. She couldn’t help but grin as
she watched the teenager intensely trying to meditate. “Angela my
dear,” she touched the girl’s shoulder to get her attention, “I
believe you’ll find that if you’re working that hard to relax, it
somewhat defeats the purpose.” Catherine was able to get the words
out with only the slightest chuckle.

Angela opened her eyes and gave Catherine the
classic look that only teenage girls can master. Roughly
translated, it’s ‘Excuse me, important things going on here. Isn’t
it obvious.’ She then rose having chosen to be the better person
and forgive Catherine for not understanding. “It’s not the
relaxation part that’s the problem,” she informed the elder
Sentinel, “it's that I can’t seem to change no matter what I do!”
Her voice revealed the frustration of effort to no avail.

“In time.” Catherine answered as her hand gently
brushed Angela’s hair back from her face. She felt love and
happiness as she looked into Angela’s youthful eyes and beyond, to
her bright, innocent flame. “I’ll come find you in the next day or
two and we’ll have another lesson, is that all right? What were you
trying to change into?”

Angela’s face brightened with intensity, “A great
white horse for John. An armored steed to take him into
battle!”

Catherine used what self-control she had left to
keep her laughter within, only the hint of a smile escaped. “It’s a
wonderful thought, I’m sure John would appreciate it. You must
remember though that whatever form you have when you leave the
gate, is the form you stay in until you return. There won’t be much
use for a horse during the battle. Maybe you should concentrate on
an easier form for your first change. What do you think?”

She watched as Angela considered her options.
“Besides, if you had accomplished the change into a great warhorse
in the middle of my living room, how would you have gotten
outside?” Catherine let the question trail off and added to
herself,
“not to mention all the new furniture
I’d need to get.”

Angela stood there deep in thought and in barely the
time it took for Catherine to speak, she incorporated all that she
heard into her plans with one minor adjustment. They were now her
ideas of course.

“Did the Caretaker ask you to stop by and start a
fire for us?” The day’s efforts began to overtake Catherine as she
sat at the table. “Did he give you a message for me?”

Angela awakened from her thoughts, “Yes, he asked if
I would let you know that unexpected events may detain him. He’ll
explain when he sees you.” Angela suddenly had a worried look. “By
the way, when the Caretaker places a thought in a person’s mind
does he see what that person is thinking about at that moment?”

Catherine could feel the worry emanating from her,
“No Angela, if the Caretaker, John or I give you a mental message
we make sure that we respect the privacy of any thoughts you are
having at the time. Think of it as if we are speaking to you.” She
couldn’t help but smile at the relief Angela showed,
“That must have been a very naughty thought she was having
when he dropped in on her!”

“The Caretaker and I thank you very much.” Angela
patiently endured the hug and a kiss on the forehead from
Catherine. “Are you going to be all right getting home on your own?
It is very late.”

“No problem, I’ll be fine.”

“I’ll let your parents know you’re on your way.”
Catherine made her put on a heavy coat and gave her a lantern from
the kitchen. Once Angela was on her way and Catherine had sent her
parents a message, her own thoughts turned to the Caretaker. What
could have happened? Why didn’t he just drop into her mind and talk
to her himself. Something must have gone very wrong.

Catherine reached out with her senses, she found the
Caretaker along with John and Dionara at Danielle and Edward’s
home. She didn’t interrupt, but neither did she need to contact
their minds to feel the emotions.

She only meant to take a brief look to see if
everything was all right, but in that moment she felt more than she
should have. The Caretaker was telling Dionara about Diana,
Catherine felt the intense love for Diana that flooded from him as
he allowed his emotions to surface. This was not the love one has
for a child or a dear friend, the depth and manor of the love that
flowed from the Caretaker embodied the deepest desire for another
that is either fulfilled by a lifetime union in the expression of
ultimate joy, or denied as a sadness and an emptiness that is with
you always.

Catherine withdrew her mind. She knew well the love
she felt from the Caretaker, it had the same depth of desire, the
same feel that her love had for him. It was the love she had hoped
she would receive from him in time, but never came. The Caretaker
loved her, she knew that, but in their twenty years together she
had never felt his love reach the ultimate depth for her that he
had felt for Diana.

Her mental walls went full up, solid as steel. She
looked inward,
“Come on Catherine, you’ve always
known this,”
she spoke to the little girl flowing with tears
deep inside her,
“It was a fools hope to think
his love for me would ever match his love for her. I knew that
going in. It’s not Diana’s fault, not his, and not Dionara’s, it
just is. He has always been open and honest, loving and caring. If
he has buried his feelings for Diana, it’s as much to protect
himself as me.”

Catherine sat cross-legged in front of the fire
taking deep, slow breaths. She called upon every bit of her
substantial inner strength to clear her mind and existed in
complete silence, not the slightest thought. Her body relaxed to
the gentle rhythm of her heartbeat.

After awhile she rose and began to rebuild her
thoughts. She remembered the love she felt for him, she remember
the love she felt from him. She recalled the many times they had
shared love and laughter in ways and to depths that no other human
could conceive. These were gifts that the world would envy her for
if they new. Calm and centered, she went to the bedroom and rested
in the bed they had shared for decades. She drew his pillow into
her and surrounded it with her arms as it brushed a tear from her
cheek.

V

In his small, single room cottage isolated miles
from the farms and village, John knelt before the hearth and put
metal to stone. The dry kindling ignited with the promise of a warm
fire to come. He lit each lamp as he circled the room and took in
the comfort of home. His bed, dresser, table and a single chair
took up a corner near the hearth. The open area that remained
allowed him complete freedom of movement for training.

He looked to the various swords and hand weapons
mounted on the walls,
“A little staff work will
do the trick I think.”
He smiled, noting that he always went
through the same ritual whenever he wanted to relax,
“Ah well, ritual has its place too.”
He held the
six-foot wooden staff horizontally chest high and began slow,
deliberate movements to create a rhythm that would build from
serene and graceful to deadly swift.

“Peace, calm.”
He emptied
his mind of all thought to find his center, his muscles moved on
practice and instinct. As he settled into the comfort of routine,
he assessed his tactical situation. He could do nothing about the
Red Knight. It was up to the Caretaker and Dionara to find that
solution.
“Kalibra and Yamikura are my
problem.”
His thoughts trailed off as he cleared his mind
and once more found center.

His worries quickly resurfaced.
“I
could face one or the other, but not both, and it will take at
least three Elites to keep the other one occupied.”
Then he
recalled the power, talent and speed that flowed from the Crimson
Guard captain’s perfectly calm center and a cold chill ran along
John’s limbs. No matter which one he faced, his opponent would have
no hesitation, no weakness.

“Ouch!” John stopped to rub his calf where the staff
had struck.
“It’s been awhile since I’ve done
that.”
He thought with a grin,
“If I don’t
find my center it won’t matter who I face. Sleep may be my best
training tonight.”

John stretched beneath the blanket, the room now lit
only by the flickers of hearth light. He thanked Spirit for the
blessings of the day, a custom more than a prayer, one that has
largely been forgotten among Forest and Kingdom. His thoughts
turned to the coastal Mindow slaves and wondered if their beliefs
were true.
“Is there a Prime Creator? Does Spirit
guide us on a life path?”
In counterpoint, his memories of
the pain, injustice, suffering and death that he had sensed in his
mind’s travels gave him pause.
“Perhaps, perhaps
not,”
were his final thoughts before sleep overtook him.

In his dreamscape, he found himself once again a boy
barely in his teens standing in front of the Forest gate with the
Caretaker.

“Please! Please Caretaker, I’m old enough.
Honest!”