Forever (3 page)

Being with both of them last night had been beyond anything she’d experienced before. It had been exhilarating and potently erotic. But it had also been taboo. Two men, let alone two brothers, making love to her at the same time. Especially these two brothers, with their history.

What had she been thinking?

Well, that’s just it. She hadn’t been thinking.

Her cheeks heated. Both men had rushed off so … what must they think of her?

Sure, they had arranged the adventure, but based on
her
fantasy. Clearly, in the cold light of day, faced with the result of their act, they hadn’t been happy. Otherwise, wouldn’t they have waited around to enjoy more of the same? At least, that was the way it always happened in her fantasies.

Fool. The two men probably didn’t even want to look each other in the face.

So she’d made an already complex and uncomfortable situation even worse.

She sighed and finished her coffee, then called to tell the limo driver she’d be down in five minutes.

She’d just have to steel herself and face whatever awaited her at the office.

*   *   *

The elevator doors opened and Jessica walked out expecting to see Melanie sitting at her desk, but she was nowhere to be seen. She was probably off running a quick errand for Dane, and would be back shortly, but the phone on her desk was ringing so Jessica rushed over to pick it up.

She jotted a note on the small pad of paper Melanie kept by the phone, then hung up. She stared at Dane’s office door, which was closed. Was Rafe already here, too?

If she was lucky, maybe both of them would be too busy today to even see her. More likely, they’d avoid her, which would give her some time to come to terms with what had happened. Or at least, for the sting of their abandonment this morning to wane a little.

Dane’s office door opened. No such luck.

But she glanced up to see Melanie exiting the office and … she looked upset.

Melanie walked toward her desk, not seeming to notice Jessica. Her cheeks were flushed and she brushed her face with her hand. Suddenly, Jessica realized she was wiping away a tear. She bolted to her feet and rushed toward her friend.

“Melanie, what’s wrong?”

Melanie glanced at her in a daze.

“I…” She drew in a breath and shook her head. “I…” Her voice cracked and then tears spilled from her eyes. “I don’t work here anymore.”

“What?” Shock rippled through Jessica.

Melanie grabbed her purse from her desk and hurried toward the elevator. Jessica followed on her heels. Melanie stabbed at the Down button.

“What happened? Did you quit?” Jessica asked.

Melanie shook her head.

The elevator doors opened and Melanie bolted inside. Jessica followed her, but Melanie shook her head.

“No, Jessica. I don’t want to talk right now.”

Jessica backed off and watched the doors close. What could possibly have happened? Melanie was the best secretary Dane could ever hope for.

She jerked her head around and glared at Dane’s office, the door still open after Melanie’s hasty retreat. She turned and marched into his office. He glanced up as she entered.

“Melanie just told me she’s not working here anymore.”

His lips compressed. “That’s true.”

“Did you fire her?” she demanded.

He was silent for a moment, watching her intently. Then he calmly answered. “Yes.”

Her hands clenched into fists and she sucked in a breath, trying to calm the raging flood of adrenaline. “Why?”

He shook his head. “That’s between me, Melanie, and Human Resources.”

She scowled, anger surging through her. “How could you possibly fire her? It’s wrong.”

He sighed. “Calm down, Jessica.”

She paced toward his desk, her heart thundering. “Don’t you tell me to calm down.”

“Then sit.”

She sat, automatically acquiescing to that damnable authoritative tone of his.

He stood up and walked around to the front of his desk and sat on the edge. “You may have forgotten that this is a business. Sometimes people get fired.”

“Not Melanie. It doesn’t make sense.”

“Only because you don’t know the whole story, and that’s not up to me to tell.” He sighed. “Look, Jessica. It seems that our
arrangement
is blurring the line between our business and personal relationship. Not only that, it’s causing unnecessary complications. With Rafe. And with Melanie.”

“Clearly you solved the latter,” she said with gritted teeth.

He raised an eyebrow and nodded. “And I intend to solve the former.” He pushed himself to his feet. “Our arrangement ends now. From here on forward, you will be my personal assistant. That’s all. If you prefer not to keep working directly for me, you could take over Melanie’s role as Rafe’s secretary. Or become his personal assistant. I’m sure he’d be willing to take an office on another floor if you’d like more distance from me.”

Shock vaulted through her. She bolted to her feet and glared at him. “Oh, my God. Did you fire Melanie to open up the position for me? Were you tired of me so you wanted to push me into another job?” She planted her hands on her hips. “Or was that Rafe’s idea?”

Annoyance flared in his eyes. “No. Rafe had nothing to do with this.”

“Fine. You want me out of here. I’m gone.” She turned and stormed out of his office.

Her stomach clenching, she headed straight for the elevator. She stabbed the Down button, but couldn’t handle waiting for it to arrive, so she headed for the stairs.

Her heart raced as she realized she’d just quit her job.

But worse, Dane had ended their relationship. She was sure, deep down inside, that he had some good reason for firing Melanie, though she couldn’t imagine what. But he’d offered no explanation. Even if he couldn’t tell her why, to keep Melanie’s privacy, he could have given her some hint that he hadn’t wanted to do it.

But he hadn’t. She never would have believed the man she’d fallen in love with could be so coldhearted; firing Melanie and then discarding Jessica as if she was nothing to him.

She sucked back a sob. In spite of everything, the finality of this moment, knowing that her relationship with Dane was well and truly over, made her ache inside.

*   *   *

Rafe dragged his hand through his hair as he stared out over the city skyline from his apartment window. Having a threesome with Dane and Jess had been an insane idea, but he’d been desperate to find a way to win her back, and somehow that had seemed like the best option.

Of course, the idea had turned him on. It had always turned him on, but he hadn’t thought she’d go for it in the past. She’d even said as much. And he’d had a long way to go to get past his jealousy of another man touching her. But when they’d found themselves in this situation, where she was already sleeping with Dane, and didn’t seem inclined to stop, even after Rafe had proposed, then he’d known he had to do something drastic. He’d been so sure that when she compared the two of them side-by-side, that she’d know in her heart that it was Rafe she loved.

Watching Dane punish her had been hard, but at the same time, it had turned him on immensely. So much so, that when she’d come to talk to him in the middle of the night, and he had taken control, he’d actually beaten her. His hands clenched into fists. He’d been a fucking idiot. Acting on hormones rather than compassion. As much as she said she’d liked it, he knew he’d gotten carried away. The angry redness of her skin had shocked him back to reality. How could he have allowed himself to hurt her like that?

His cell phone buzzed and he pulled it from his pocket.

“There is a Ms. Jessica Long here to see you, Mr. Ranier. Shall I send her up?”

Fuck.
He really didn’t want to face her right now.

“Yeah, Benjamin. Go ahead.”

He walked to the bedroom and grabbed a T-shirt from his dresser drawer and pulled it on. His jeans were worn and threadbare in places, but they were comfortable and he knew she was used to seeing him dressed this way. In fact, she preferred it to his more expensive in-line-with-their-family-status clothing he now typically wore. At least, as Rafe Ranier. As Storm, he wore whatever the hell he wanted and didn’t give a shit what anyone else thought.

A knock sounded at the door, so he headed toward it and pulled it open.

The sight of Jess standing there, her pretty face drawn into a tight expression, clearly distraught, was like a punch in the gut.

Was she upset that he’d walked out this morning? Or was it about their midnight dominance session?

“Come in.”

She followed him into the living room, and they sat down on the couch together.

“What’s wrong, Jess?”

She gazed at him and he could see the turmoil in her eyes. “I quit my job.”

He frowned. “But I thought you loved working for Dane.” Ah, fuck. “Is this about last night? Did our … escapade make things too awkward in the office?”

“No. Nothing like that. It’s because…” She sucked in a breath. “Dane fired Melanie.”

Shock careened through him. “What? Why?”

She shook her head. “I don’t know. He wouldn’t tell me.”

Rafe understood that. The reason an employee was fired was a privacy issue. But what possible grounds could Dane have for firing Melanie? She was an exceptional secretary.

“Don’t worry. I’ll talk to him. I’m sure we can get this all sorted out.”

“I don’t know. It’s a pretty big mess.” She folded her hands in her lap. “I hope you can get Melanie’s job back, but mine.…” She shook her head. “I don’t think that will work.”

“Why? What else is going on, Jess?”

“I just…” She sucked in a breath. “I couldn’t believe Dane would do this. And when I confronted him, he broke it off between the two of us. He said our physical relationship was interfering with business.”

She and Dane had broken up? He knew he should be happy about that, but he wasn’t. Probably because deep inside he knew how much she loved Dane. Even while Dane took charge of her in the bedroom, there was a tenderness in his eyes when he looked at her. Rafe had no doubt that his brother was in love with this woman.

He rested his hand on her arm. “Jess, I’m sorry.”

She shook her head. “No, it’s good. It’s better I find out now that he’s a heartless bastard.” She drew in a breath that he was sure was staving off a sob. “And that I’m nothing more to him than a lay.”

Rafe stroked her cheek. “I’m sure that isn’t true.”

“I don’t want to talk about Dane right now.” She took his hand. “I think we should talk about last night. Since you were gone before I woke us this morning, I assume you had a problem with what happened. Were you jealous of me with Dane? Or,”—she gazed at him questioningly—“were you judging me for the fact I enjoyed being dominated and punished?”

Her words were like a kick in the gut.

“I wasn’t judging you. It’s just that…” Damn it. He pushed himself to his feet and paced. “It made me damned uncomfortable.” He turned to face her. “My father was a real ass. He wasn’t just authoritative, he was abusive. He beat me regularly.”

Her eyes widened. “Oh, my God. That’s awful.”

He nodded as he continued to pace. “Not Dane, though. Dane was more the son the old man wanted.” He shrugged. “Maybe part of it was, he had no use for a second son. Dane could take over the business, and I…” He shrugged again. “I was just more effort. If he could have found a way to send me off to foster care without it reflecting badly on the family, he probably would have done it. Instead, he kept me around, but made it clear to me that I’d better not embarrass the family by not being a Ranier. I had better fall in line and be an appropriate partner in the family business.”

“I’m so sorry, Rafe.” She stood up and wrapped her arms around him.

He enjoyed the warmth and acceptance of her embrace. She always made him feel loved, something he’d never really had before. He realized that that’s why he’d run away from their relationship to go on tour. Because it scared him. And that’s also why he’d run back. Because he didn’t want to be without it.

She raised her lips to his and kissed him, her mouth soft and inviting. He felt her fingertips gliding under his T-shirt and over his abs. She started to pull the fabric up and his body ached for the intimacy her actions promised, but he grasped her hands to stop her.

“No, I can’t,” he said.

She gazed at him in shock. “Why not?”

“Because. It’s not fair to you.”

“What do you mean?”

He drew away from her warm, inviting body. “I can’t do this because I know there’s no future for us. I was wrong. We aren’t meant to be together.”

“Because I like to be dominated?”

“That’s part of it. Dane can give you what you want in that department, but I can’t.”

“Rafe, that doesn’t matter.” She tried to touch him again but he stepped out of reach.

“It
does
matter. I can’t allow myself to open that door. My dad was an abuser and…” He shrugged. “I can’t go down that path. Dane has a lot of control, but I … I don’t trust what might happen.”

She shook her head. “No. You would never go too far.”

“Do you think my father logically thought, ‘Ah, I’m going to beat my son today’? Or do you think he just lost control and did it?” He stepped toward her and her eyes widened. With anger fuming through him, she must feel intimidated. “Like I did last night.”

“No, you had just—“

“Had a drink? My father was often drunk when he beat me.”

“I think your father was a monster and I know you
aren’t.
You would never really hurt me.”

He compressed his lips. “Well, that’s where you’re wrong. Because what I’m about to do will probably hurt quite a bit.”

She gazed at him in shock.

“Because right now I’m telling you that we’re through. I realized that I’m not really in love with you.” He paced across the room. “I haven’t had a lot of affection or love in my life, and when you showed me so much love,”—he shrugged—“I cherished it. Then when I lost it, I realized I couldn’t bear my life without it.” He patted his chest. “It filled a hole deep in here. But I realize, now, that it wasn’t love. Let’s face it. Neither of us really knew each other. You only knew a small part of who I am. And I had no idea that you liked to be dominated in the bedroom. And don’t tell me it’s not important to you because I know it is. But it makes us … incompatible.” He sighed. “I don’t want to hurt you. But just like last time, if I don’t take action now, it’ll only hurt more when we finally both discover that we’re just not right for each other.”