Four Week Fiance 2 (18 page)

“Really,” I said as I kissed the side of her face and ran my hands through her hair. She reached up and ran her hands down my back and I let my chest crush against her breasts. We rolled over onto our sides and our legs entwined together.

“Really,” she said, her eyes fluttering open as she pulled back slightly. “I can do it now and prove it to you.”

“Do what?” I growled at her as my hand crawled up to her breast and squeezed.

“You know what.” She moaned as I pinched her nipple lightly and I could feel her nails digging into my arms.

“You can do that, but if you do, I won’t be able to do this,” I said and pushed my hardness into her belly. I could feel her body shaking as I held her and I slipped my other hand under her top and under her bra.

“TJ, don’t.” She tried to push my hand away. “Someone might see.”

“Who?” I raised an eyebrow at her. “The horses?” I leaned over and sucked on her neck. “I don’t think they care.”

“Oh, TJ,” she moaned and I felt her hand reaching down to my hardness and squeezing. I grinned as I felt her pressing her breast against the palm of my hand.

“Yes, dear Mila?” I asked as I pulled her top off and then undid her bra.

“Don’t stop,” she whispered as I bent down and took her nipple in my mouth. “Just don’t stop.” She purred as I nibbled on her breast lightly and I growled against her while I felt myself growing even harder.

“S
o you guys had fun horse riding, huh?” Sally asked with narrowed eyes as she gazed at me.

“Yes, he just wanted to surprise me and clear the air,” I said as I looked around TJ’s apartment to make sure it was clean and presentable for our first dinner party. “It was amazing.”

“Clear the air?” Sally cocked her head. “You mean because you’re in love with him and he’s an ass?”

“No.” I shook my head at her and sighed. “It’s been intense between us and maybe I’ve been pushing it too much. TJ never made any promises to me. I like him. He likes me. We’re having fun and I’m helping him with a business deal. That’s it.”

“You’re having kinky sex with him and you love him. That’s just a little bit more complicated than what you just said.” Sally put her hands on her hips and her lips thinned. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine.” She sighed. “We both know that. But you’re telling yourself you’re fine because you want to be with him.”

“Sally, not tonight, please.”

“Fine.” She shrugged. “Not tonight. Tonight we will have fun, but it’s something you need to think about seriously. The more you give of yourself, the more it’s going to hurt at the end.”

“So you’re not even pretending that you think there’s going to be a good ending for me now?”

“What do I know?” She sighed again and gave me a weak smile. “I’m just worried for you. You know what they say about guys. Take them at their word. If he says he doesn’t love you and he doesn’t want a serious relationship, well, that’s what he means.”

“Yeah,” I said and looked away from her, my heart pounding and my head starting to feel sad again.

“Ignore me.” She grabbed my hands and gave me a huge smile. “I’m just bitter because Cody doesn’t have the time of day for me.”

“Didn’t he call you last week?”

“Yeah, it was just some random call to talk about you.” She made a face. “It wasn’t to ask me on a date or anything.”

“Aw, he’s trying, though.” I gave her a weak smile, but really didn’t know what else to say. Why was Cody calling her? And did he know the depth of her feelings for him? I knew that TJ knew I loved him, but I didn’t know if he knew just how deeply I loved and adored him.  It was an embarrassing and scary thought thinking he knew just how much I wanted him.

“How do I look?” Sally spun around in her cute, short black-and-white dress, and I grinned at her as she changed the subject.

“You look absolutely gorgeous and you know that.”

“I do look pretty hot.” She giggled as she flicked her hair behind her shoulders and smiled at me, her bright red lips glistening on her glowing face. Her big brown eyes were radiating confidence and her eyelashes looked longer than I’d ever seen them with her new mascara. Sally looked absolutely gorgeous and I knew that she was hoping that Cody, when he arrived, would notice as well. I didn’t know what to think about that. Cody was my brother and I loved him, but I didn’t think he deserved someone like Sally, at least not how he had been treating her recently. She deserved an amazing man who would sweep her off of her feet and show her that she was his world, and I wasn’t sure if Cody was confident enough to be the man to do that.

“You look amazing as well.” Sally grinned at me and then whistled. “Absolutely beautiful. Being engaged is really doing it for you. Have you also lost some weight?” She looked at me again and tilted her head.

“I’ve lost about ten pounds.” I nodded and sighed. “I haven’t really been able to eat or sleep,” I admitted. “I haven’t really been working out or dieting. I just have all this nervous pent-up energy.”

“Oh no.” Sally frowned and looked at me. “That doesn’t sound good.”

“I guess I just feel so frustrated.” I lowered my voice. “You know how much I love TJ. You know that I want to be with him forever. You know that, well, he’s the one who has had my heart forever. And, well, I feel like every day I spend with him, I fall in love with him deeper and deeper, but I also keep making a longer crack in my heart. I don’t know how I’m going to survive after this ends.” I bit down on my lower lip, my eyes wide as I stared at her. The empty, sinking feeling entered my stomach again and I took a deep breath. I could not cry now. I was fed up of crying. And I didn’t want to ruin my makeup. Smeared mascara and eyeliner didn’t look good. At all.

“Oh, honey.” Sally’s eyes widened in response to what I’d said. “You need to just leave him. You need to forget this whole arrangement. He’s not good for your heart. I know you love him, but if he’s making you feel bad about yourself, he’s not worth it. There will be other men, Mila. You are beautiful. You are generous. You’re funny. Smart. Shit, you’re the perfect girl. Any man would be happy to be with you. Trust me. You will fall for someone much better.”

“But none of them will be TJ,” I said, my voice bleak.

“They will be better than TJ.”

“There is no one better than TJ.” I gulped. “He’s my everything.”

“But you’re not his everything,” Sally said softly, her face sympathetic. “Don’t you want a man who will make you his everything?”

“I just want TJ to love me.”

“Oh, we’re messes.” Sally sighed and grabbed my hand. “How did we get to this place? Both of us in love with men who can’t seem to love us. What are we doing to ourselves?”

“I don’t know.”

“I don’t want to be single forever.” Sally’s lips pursed. “And I don’t want to be waiting on Cody forever either. What if it never happens? What if he never falls for me? What if I end up at fifty, never married, no kids, no loves, no nothing because I just waited around on him?”

“That won’t happen,” I said, but then as I spoke the words I realized the same thing could happen to me. What if I just waited around on TJ to somehow fall in love with me and be okay with it? How long would I wait? What if it never happened? What if he fell in love with someone else while I was here waiting? It would crush me, and even thinking about it made me feel sick. Imagining him with someone else, falling in love, telling her he adored her, holding her close, kissing her—oh, God, that would kill me. I would be devastated.

“What are you thinking about, Mila?” Sally asked softly. “You look like you just found out someone died.”

“What if TJ falls in love with someone else? Marries her? What if TJ’s not the problem? What if it’s me? What if he just can’t fall in love with me because I’m not the one for him?

“Let’s see how tonight goes and then we should have a serious conversation. Neither of us can just stay in these positions. It’s not healthy for us.”

“I know.” I nodded. “I need to talk to TJ as well. Need to tell him some stuff. Need to just be free to accept whatever happens next. I don’t want to be living in this emotional turmoil anymore.”

“Yeah, it’s not healthy,” Sally agreed and we just stared at each other for a few moments, both of us wondering what it was going to take to get the other one to step off of the ledge.

***

“W
ell, don’t you two look pretty?” TJ walked over to me and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek as he got home. Then he walked over to Sally and gave her a hug. “Looks like I got home just in time.”

“Yeah, just in time to not cook anything.” I shook my head at him. “Lucky you.”

“Did you really want my help cooking?”

“No,” I laughed and he grinned down at me, his eyes glowing.

“I’m just going to go and change quickly,” he said with a laugh and walked towards the bedroom. “I’ll be back.”

“Okay,” I said and looked at Sally, who was smiling.

“Don’t miss me too much,” he said with another laugh and I shook my head at him.

“I’ll try not to.” I giggled and grabbed Sally’s hand. “Let’s go and get a drink. We deserve one.”

“I’m down for that,” she agreed and we headed towards the kitchen. “So, TJ seems like he is in a good mood.”

“Yeah, he does,” I agreed happily. “It’s been nice this last week.”

“That’s good.” She nodded. “How’s it been going with his business deal? Have you met many of the shareholders and partners? How’s his dad been?”

“To be honest, I haven’t really seen his dad or anyone else since that party.” I shrugged. “And every time I bring it up to TJ, he changes the subject.”

“That’s weird.”

“Yeah, it is.” I nodded and held up a bottle of wine in one hand and a bottle of vodka in the other. “What’s your poison?”

“I need liquid courage tonight.” Sally grinned. “I’ll have a vodka-Sprite.”

“I think I’ll have the same.” I laughed and put the bottle of wine down. “So yeah, I’m not really sure how it’s going.”

“Four weeks is going to be up soon, though.” Sally looked thoughtful. “I’m guessing that this arrangement is going to last longer, then?”

“We haven’t really discussed it.” I shrugged, but I knew that I was hopeful inside. I was hopeful that it would last forever. Well, not the engagement. I was hoping the engagement would last long enough to become real and then we’d get married.

“I guess nothing’s happening yet?” she said uncertainly. “What about work? Are your parents doing better?”

“I don’t think so.” I sighed. “And I know they don’t want to tell Nonno and worry him.”

“Are you going to tell him?”

“I don’t think so.” I shook my head. “That’s up to my parents.”

“Yeah, I guess so. But aren’t you majority owner?”

“I don’t really like bringing that up.” I bit down on my lower lip. “And it’s not like it means much until I’m thirty anyways. That’s when the shares vest.”

“That just means that’s when you can access the money. You still have all the rights as majority shareholder, Mila.” Sally pursed her lips. “Maybe you should ask TJ if he can give you some advice and help.”

“I don’t want to do that.” I shook my head. “It seems like it would be overstepping.”

“That’s not overstepping.” She sighed. “Maybe he can help.”

“Yeah, maybe.”

“Any word on Barbie?” she asked casually and I shook my head.

“I have no care to ever hear her name again.” I made a face and handed Sally her drink before downing mine. “No care at all.”

“Yeah.” She laughed and downed her drink as well.

Ding dong
.

“I guess Cody’s here,” I said as I put my drink down and walked towards the front door. “You going to be okay?”

“I’ll be fine,” Sally said as she took a deep breath. “God, I hope I don’t make a fool of myself.”

“You won’t.” I grinned at her. “I’ll make sure you don’t.” I winked at her and then continued on my way and opened the door. “Hey, bro,” I said and gave him a hug.

“Hey, you.” He kissed me on the cheek and surveyed my face. “You look happy.”

“I am happy.” I nodded and then noticed that there were two guys standing next to him. “Hi, I’m Mila,” I said as I stepped away from him.

“Oh, yeah, this is Brody and this is James,” Cody said as he nodded to his two handsome friends. “I hope you don’t mind that I invited them.”

“It’s no problem.” I smiled at him, but inside I was shouting. I hoped I had made enough food.

“Great,” he said and grinned at me. I saw his eyes searching inside the apartment and then he stopped when he saw Sally. “Hey, Sally, I was wondering if you were going to be here.”

“She’s my best friend, of course she was going to be here,” I said, answering for her. “Are there going to be any other surprise guests tonight?” I gave Cody a look and he looked confused.

“Like who?”

“Barbie?” I hissed.

“Oh, she’s got a boyfriend.” He shrugged. “I guess she’s dating some rich, older dude.”

“What?” I frowned. “Already?”

“I don’t know the story, but she had my watch and I wanted it back and, well, she said her ‘rich, older boyfriend’ wouldn’t appreciate me coming over to get it.”

“Okay.” I shook my head but didn’t continue the conversation. I didn’t want Sally to hear us talking about Barbie and be reminded of his dalliance.

“Hi, guys.” Sally did a sexy strut towards the four of us and I could see that all of the guys’ attention was on her and her long legs in the heels she was wearing.

“Hi, I’m Brody.” The tall, stocky blond guy stood forward and shook her hand.

“Hi, Brody.” Sally gave him a dazzling smile. “Nice to meet you.”

“You too, my dear, you too.” He was grinning at her and continued to stand close to her.

“And this is James.” Cody looked at Brody with an annoyed expression on his face.

“Nice to meet you, James.” Sally smiled at him as well and he gave her a soft smile before turning to me.

“Hi, I’m James,” he said, his big blue eyes sparkling as he gazed at me.

“Mila. Cody’s sister, if you didn’t figure that out yet.”

“You’re much prettier than him,” he said, and I laughed.