Fraternizing (41 page)

I nodded my head.
He seemed to be growing more agitated by the second.

“I made the
choice to start sleeping with one of my students. I didn’t know I’d fall in
love with her, but I have, and right or wrong, I’m glad it happened, and I
wouldn’t change it for anything. So whatever
happens,
happens. If they want to be ashamed or disappointed in me, fine. If they want
to continue idolizing me, fine. The fact of the matter is that
you
are what fucking matters to me. How you see me matters, and your approval is
all I’m looking for.”

My heart swelled
as butterflies flew widely inside of me. Alex had just admitted to loving me,
something I had no idea was coming.

“Alex, you just
said you love me.”

“I did. And I
mean it.” He placed his hand on my thigh. “You have no fucking clue what you’ve
done to me, Blondie. I’m ready to be publicly shamed if it means I get to have
you with me. I’ll walk through fucking fire if I have to.”

I unbuckled my
seat belt and scooted over to the middle seat, directly next to him. I placed
my head down on his shoulder and took his hand, kissing the top of it
repeatedly.

“I love you too,
Alex.”

The music
collection on his phone was playing through the speakers again, and as luck
would have it,
Shameless
by Garth
Brooks played on the radio.

“You listen to
country?” I asked, lifting my head, a little surprised by it.

“A little bit, as
long as it’s not about losing my dog or my truck,” he responded, before singing
along to the song.

I laughed at the
stereotype,
then
rested my head on his shoulder again,
singing along with him as he barreled down the freeway, taking us back to our
other, less enjoyable world.

Chapter 25

Alex

Tuesday morning came much too quickly.

My
lonely bed had me craving the warmth of Cassie’s body snuggled next to mine. I
fucking hated putting her into that taxi last night, sending her back to her
own personal hell. Thankfully, she had Dalton in her corner, and I was slowly
but surely seeing him for the loyal friend that she needed. My guard was always
up though. You just never could be completely sure of everyone’s sincerity.
 

Ruiz
was another story. I couldn’t stand the thought of her alone with Cassie. Just
thinking about it was like being punched repeatedly in the face. It was
painful, and the more I thought about it, the more defensive I became. The
thought to have one of them removed came to mind, but like the fight with Allen
and his roommate a few weeks prior, things like that got investigated and
sifted through with a fine tooth comb. Surely something would come up that
would spill everything, so it was best to just leave things as they were and
hope for the best.

Riley
was already up and in the kitchen when I walked out. He stood leaning against
the island with a mug of coffee in his hand, reading the newspaper again. He
looked up when he saw me.

“So,
how was it?”

I
nodded my head, still feeling a bit empty at the fact that I was sucked in and
standing firm in my reality once again. Not having her near me was brutal, and
the day before when she was dreading the return, and I was trying to make light
of it, it didn’t dawn on me that it would gut me this way.

“I’ll
see you later, man. I have to get shit set up and ready for class today,” I
said, not bothering to grab anything before I walked out the door.

Pulling
into the parking lot, I spotted Castillo getting out of her Jeep. The sight of
her disgusted me. I’d let shit get much too far, and as far as I was concerned,
I needed my mind bleached and scrubbed to remove the guilt-ridden memory of it
all. I parked and rushed over to her before she could get inside and around
people.

“Hey,
Alex. Long time no see. How was your weekend?” She was acting so casual, like
the desperate lie she’d told had never come out of her mouth.

I
stepped closer, glowering at her. “My weekend was just fine. How was yours? And
was that amazing fuck we had before the weekend everything you imagined?”

Her
eyes shot open; no amount of words could have expressed the shock permeating
her face.

“I
didn’t—“

“Save
the bullshit, Leti. I let you put that filthy fucking mouth of yours on my
dick, and I regret the hell out of it. I should have never fallen for your
shit, and I want to kick my own ass for letting it happen.”

 
My look grew more sinister as my body
temperature rose and my jaw clenched. “Let me make myself ab-so-fucking-lute-ly
clear. Every time I’ve been with you has been a colossal mistake. I’ll be the
first to admit that some people need to learn the hard way, and I’m one of
those people. But I’ll be damned if I let you tell blatant lies about me and
get away with it.”

I
leaned closer, our faces nearly touching one another. “Take this as your one
and only fucking warning. I’ll keep my dick out of your mouth, and you keep my
name out of it as well. You understand me?”

Before
she could fix her mouth to answer, I turned and marched away. Pleasurable
memories of the beach came back, pissing me off even further now that I was
stuck in this hellhole of a desert with Cassie so close, yet so far away.

I
had spent the early part of the morning inputting test scores from the last
test taken before I took off for the long weekend. Cassie was the top scorer
again, a ninety-eight percent this time, putting her in the lead for the
challenge. I had to figure out a way to get some time off if she were to win. I
needed to spend another free flowing weekend with her, away from the constant
bullshit that this place was stuffed with.

Jensen
led the students in. The pull between Cassie and me was strong. So strong that
when I looked up from my work, my eyes immediately landed on hers, and her eyes
were glued to mine. A slight twitch of my lips curved into a smile, but I
quickly turned away, not needing to give Jensen any ammunition. We were work
associates, and that was as far as it needed to go.

“I
am passing back your tests that you took before the long weekend. Your score is
on top, and the rankings are listed on the back wall. Once we get started for
the day, you’ll have a chance to see where you stand. Remember, a seventy-two
is riding on this.”

I
passed back the papers, Ruiz never once looking me in the face as I strolled
over to her and dropped off her paper. I guess she was finally taking me
seriously. When I got around to Cassie, I dropped her paper off, standing over
her for a minute while images of the beach, the dog tags, the fire—all of
it—came rushing through my head. These next few weeks would be the hardest
ones yet—even harder than the first few that had me teetering like a
fucking seesaw. Now that things had been laid out and cemented, I wanted her
every second of the day, and restraining was proving much more difficult than I
wanted it to be.

“Yeah.
That’s right!” Allen shouted as I laid his ninety-six down on his desk. He was
pounding his chest, the whole caveman like persona grating my fucking nerves. Jensen
walked through and high-fived him, further annoying me. What he liked so much
about Allen I just couldn’t understand. He was much too loud, and much too
obnoxious, for my taste.

“Alright,
today you’ll be pairing up to work on a mock radio system. I don’t care who you
work with, just find a partner and wait for directions. Go!”

The
room became a
chatter box
with students moving here
and there, trying to figure out who they would be working with. Ruiz,
thankfully, didn’t approach Cassie. I wouldn’t have allowed that shit if she
had tried. My number one goal right now was keeping her safe, and I was going
to do it any capacity.

“Hey,
Bennett, I’ll be your partner,” Allen said, stomping over to where she stood
with a pompous grin on his face. But when I turned and watched her face, dread
completely took over, letting me know that this wasn’t a friendly gesture.

I
stepped in his way, intercepting him and turning him around to a pair that I
was about to break up.

“Pfc.
Taylor, you’re now working with Private Allen. Pfc. Jones, you’re now working
with Pfc. Bennett.”

When
I looked back to Cassie, relief shrouded her face. I knew then that I would
need to straighten some things out. Allen was an overbearing little shit, but
her look didn’t convey that. There was something more, and I was determined to
figure it out.

The
next couple of hours were devoted to various tasks on the radio systems:
trouble shooting
, jamming, and programming. The room grew
quiet as concentration filled the space. They had no idea, but they would be
graded on how well they performed each task since each one had been covered in
class over the last few weeks. Newsome, Jensen, and I floated around the room
with clipboards, verbally asking questions while also watching the students fix
numerous problems. I made sure not to be the one to test Cassie. I knew
Jensen’s watchful eyes were on me, no matter where I stood, so I let Newsome be
the one to do it, but I was never too far away.

A
few of the students stood after
their
testing, walking
over to the standings listing. Ruiz skimmed the list, finding herself in third
place. She was smart and picked up on the material rather easily, so I knew if
she just kept her fucking nose where it belonged, she’d make a fine Marine. If
not, well, I had no problems destroying all of that for her. I went to the far
corner of the room where I questioned a pair on their troubleshooting when I
heard Allen cry out, “Second place? How am I in second place?”

Jensen
walked over to him, placing his hand on Allen’s shoulder. “We still have more
tests, devil dog. You’ll get there.”

I was puzzled by the whole thing
. Was it because Cassie was
sitting in the top spot and he wanted to see anyone other than her win this
thing? I remembered that Allen acted like a fucking barbarian at the initial
PFT, and it was Jensen who congratulated him on his shit. Maybe his like of Allen
had nothing to do with Cassie? I was too wound up, and nothing fit quite right
for me. Paranoia in the form of protection was beginning to set it, and it was
already frying my fucking nerves.

By
the time the lunch hour rolled around, I was starving, and not for food. I
needed to know what the deal was between Allen and Jensen. I needed to know if
Jensen was trying to be a little bitch and keep Cassie from being the top
earner. And I most certainly needed to know what the fuck had Cassie so
startled when it came to Allen. The look on her face when he came near her was
emblazoned on my brain.

I
texted Riley, knowing he would do anything I needed him to do.

Me: Hey, man. Take Jensen out to lunch. I
need to be alone with Cassie.

His
researching skills were needed once again. If he could get Jensen alone and
shoot the shit with him, all under the guise of just catching up, he would be
doing me a world of good.

Riley: Man, I’m all for supporting, but
seriously?
At the schoolhouse?
I’ve
gotta
draw the line.

Me: I’m not fucking her. I need to get some
info.

I
looked up, scanning the room to make sure that eyes weren’t fixated on me.

Me: Find out why Jensen likes Pvt. Allen so
much.

Riley: You’ve got it. And, Alex…
don’t
fuck her here, man.
J

I
grinned at the text because I just couldn’t promise that. I shot Cassie a quick
text, telling her to leave herself available for me for lunch. The sexual
innuendo in that statement had her trying to hide a grin that was threatening
to erupt into a
full blown
smile. I liked seeing the
effect my words had on her mind and body.