“I—I’m not sure.” Their eyes locked.
Then Ross smacked his lips. “Mmm, strawberry lip gloss.”
That killed the mood. To Ross, that had been just a kiss.
“Decent technique,” she said, covering for how overwhelmed she felt.
“Decent?” He lifted a brow. “Give me another chance. Maybe I was nervous.” He leaned in, beckoning with a crooked finger.
She shook her head. “You made your point.” Even as she said no, her entire body wailed for more. “The main thing is that we’re friends and we have to protect that. I’ll find some other unsuitable man to
not
fall in love with.”
He looked at her, his eyes full of wicked mischief. If anyone could teach her how to have fun with sex, Ross could.
Uh-uh. No matter what Ross said, sex made things complicated. Ross was her friend and that was better than sex any day—even sex with him. Besides, if one kiss could turn her into a quivery mass of need, just think what the whole experience would do. She might never be the same.
He’d had thoughts about Kara when she’d first marched her serious little butt in the door at S&S, but she’d been so intent and dogged—and repressed—that he didn’t pursue her. Before long he’d gotten to know her and found her warm and open and funny and smart and they’d become friends. And friendship was a way bigger deal than sex.
He’d seen she was the type who put her heart on the line. And he’d never allow himself to hurt her. He couldn’t put pain in those eager, vulnerable eyes.
But Tina thought he could teach Kara how to separate lust from love…. Interesting. Could he? When he thought about that strawberry kiss, it seemed worth a try. On a purely physical level. Simple sex might be just what Kara needed. Could she keep it simple, though? Seemed unlikely. She was an intense woman. He, on the other hand, had simple sex down to a science.
Ever since college. Ever since Beth. That was when he’d learned it wasn’t a good idea to get attached. People changed. Or, more importantly, he changed. Beth had wanted someone stable and dependable. He’d tried to be that—taking the job her dad had lined up for him at a big graphics studio. But the work had been mere production—the replication of someone else’s creativity. He hated the daily routine, the repetitiveness, the tedium. He’d felt trapped. Then he’d started to get bored with Beth. He’d fought it, tried to hide it, but eventually all he saw was her anxious face, pale as pearlescent ink.
What’s wrong, Ross? Is it me? What am I doing wrong?
It’s not you, it’s me. It’s me, really.
A tired excuse, but, in his case, so true. He was a restless guy. He’d been young at the time and didn’t know himself well. Now he knew to stay away from women whose hearts he could break. Serious women looking for The One. Women like Kara.
His tongue found more strawberry at the roof of his mouth. Mmm. Some sack time with Kara would be amazing. She sounded like she was really interested in exploring sex with someone. Why couldn’t that someone be him? He knew her and cared about her. Some other guy might take advantage of her good nature. Could he make it safe for her? Show her how to keep sex in perspective? That was the only way it would work…if she could handle it.
He loped up the steps to his apartment, trying to remember whether or not he should avoid Lionel and Lucy, his landlords, who lived just below him. It wasn’t that he didn’t set aside the rent money, but he sometimes forgot when exactly it was due or where he’d hidden it so he wouldn’t spend it.
He’d paid, he remembered. Early, too, and thrown in a little extra for next month, since Lionel had been worrying about affording his daughter’s gymnastics day camp. Rental income tanked in the summer. Confident he was in his landlord’s good graces, Ross paused to wave through the window at Lucy.
He unlocked his door and took in the chaos with a grin. He could pick up a little, but he was more interested in working on that guitar riff he’d learned from a guy at a blues bar the night before.
Even as he tuned up, he found he was still thinking about Kara and that kiss. She’d pretended it had been nothing more than a peck, but there was fire there. Possibly total combustion.
She’d seemed certain she couldn’t fall in love with him. That was a good sign. And probably true. They were so different. She drove him nuts at work with her checklists and protocols. Of course, that was her job. Account execs stayed on top of the details, herded everyone and schmoozed the clients. The artist’s job was to be creative. At work, Kara and he were in perfect sync, but in a relationship there would be war.
He started with an easy chord progression. She’d looked so down about Scott. Why she picked those lame-asses he’d never know. He’d like to help her if he could—give her the confidence she needed to not lock on to the next corporate clone who caught on to how great she was.
She was always helping him, covering for him when he overslept, giving him pep talks when his mind seemed to have squeezed out its last creative juice. He liked to look after her, too—calm her down when she got herself wound too tight.
He moved into the licks the guitarist had shown him over one too many brewskis. If they set up some ground rules maybe…
Ground rules?
Lord, he sounded like Kara.
But she was going to do this, one way or the other. He recognized that determined Kara look. He couldn’t stand watching her get hurt by another jerk. And he knew what to watch out for with her…and if they had no expectations beyond the sex…they could have a damn fine time together.
The more he thought about it, the better it sounded. With ground rules in place, and good intentions all around, what was the worst that could happen?
Kara waited while Tina took two fast swallows. “Better,” she announced. “Now, what is it you can’t do?”
Kara made sure no one was heading into the kitchen, then she whispered, “Have sex with Ross.” In fact, she dreaded their noon spades game. The idea of gazing at him over her usually wretched hand made her break out in a sweat.
“Why not?” Tina asked.
“It’s complicated.” She’d lain awake half the night contemplating the idea, but every time she got around to reliving that kiss she freaked out. “Something happened…we kissed….”
“No!” Tina’s grin filled her face. “Dish, girl. How was it?”
“Intense.”
“Perfect! Hot sex, good times, no hassles. Just what you need.”
“No. It feels risky.”
“Risky? You couldn’t fall in love with Ross. Talk about the odd couple. You two would make Oscar and Felix look like the Bobbsey Twins…no, wait, were the Bobbsey Twins both girls? You know what I mean. It’s too early for similes.” She opened the refrigerator and began looking around, searching out leftover pastries from a client meeting, no doubt.
“I’m worried about our friendship,” Kara said. “We could end up acting strange around each other.”
Tina pulled out a bear claw and took a bite. “Mmm, this one isn’t even stale.”
“And what if I did fall for him, as insane as that is? It just feels too wrong.”
“I’d say it feels too right. You’re such a puritan about pleasure. Why can’t you just relax and have a good time?”
Why couldn’t she?
“Ross would never let you get serious.”
“True.”
“Anyway, if you’re ready for lesson number two in how to have sex for sex’s sake, I’m taking another crack at Tom tonight. I figure he’s got some rule against dating customers, so I’m doing a damsel-in-car-trouble after hours. Watch and learn.”
“Past my bedtime. You can give me the play-by-play tomorrow.” Kara paused, remembering what Tom had said about Tina being lonely. “Are you sure Tom’s the kind of guy you want? He seems like a pretty serious guy.”
“Not when I get through with him,” she said, but she didn’t sound as certain as usual. Maybe Tina was lonely, like Tom said. Her manhunter attitude did seem forced at times. Kara had assumed she’d just been seeing Tina through her own filters, but if even Tom had noticed…
“Just be careful, Tina. I don’t want you to get…” She started to say
hurt,
but Tina would hate that, so she said, “too involved with a guy who might get hooked on you.”
“I’ll be fine. So will he, believe me,” she said with her characteristic confidence.
Two hours later, Kara returned to the kitchen for her usual midmorning snack—fat-free yogurt, a hard-boiled egg and five carrot sticks—the only variation being the addition of celery, when she felt festive. She opened the refrigerator and bent to get her bag from its place, thinking that her life was as predictable as her snacks, when something utterly new happened—a warm hand stroked her butt.
She yelped, bumped her head on the bottom of the ice compartment, then turned to see Ross standing too close, wearing that appraising look she’d seen him give potential female conquests. A shiver ran through her, but she masked it by rubbing the bump on her head. “Was I in your way?”
“I thought you had a little something on your skirt—dust, maybe,” he said, his wicked expression contradicting his innocent words. He reached past her to close the refrigerator behind her. “I’ve been thinking about your proposal,” he said, standing too close.
“Oh, that.” She felt herself go red. In the stark light of the office kitchen, the idea seemed ridiculous. “I think that second Fuzzy Navel gave me fuzzy
brain.
” She tried to laugh.
“Tina had the Fuzzy Navel. You had a prickly-pear margarita.”
“Oh, right. See what I mean?”
“I think I can help you, Kara.”
“You already have. You kept my drink straight. Not to mention my skirt dusted. I’ll be just fine.” In fact, she’d already made a plan. She was going to stop by the naughty lingerie store Tina had recommended for something electronic, then rent a sexy video—a tasteful one. She figured the combination of video and vibrator might be complex enough that she could pretend there was someone else arousing her besides her electricity-aided self. That should cancel her sex-equals-marriage equation, or at least reduce the itch for a while. Hopefully, that would be enough.
If it wasn’t, she’d think about finding someone to experiment with. Someone
not
Ross.
“You’re chickening out?” Ross said, his eyes teasing. “The kiss was too much for you?”
“Not at all. We’re friends, remember? We don’t want to risk that.”
“Yeah, but maybe being friends makes it better. I know what you’re trying to accomplish, so I can help you better than some strange guy would. We could be careful. We could, say, set some ground rules.”
“Ground rules?” Her ears perked at that. He’d obviously spent some time thinking about this.
“I knew you’d like the ground rules part.” He grinned. “So come to my apartment tonight and we’ll have some beer and figure out how to make this safe.”
“I don’t think so,” she said. She
was
chicken. She wasn’t sure she could handle this, and losing Ross’s friendship would be terrible. Not to mention the tension at work. If the gadgets and videos didn’t work, she’d find someone else.
“You don’t know what you’re missing.”
Her stomach shimmied at the look in his eyes. He was probably right. It would be wonderful to put herself in Ross’s hands…so to speak. She liked him, and she knew he cared about her. There wouldn’t be any of that awkwardness of being strangers.
“I’ll have to take your word for it,” she said. She was
definitely
chicken.
The clerk didn’t bat an eye, thank God, and Kara rushed out of the store with her purchases in a plain brown bag, feeling as if she’d dodged a bullet.
Next stop, the video store. Pausing in the self-help section she picked out an instructional video featuring a positive-thinking guru, then slipped behind the purple curtain with the Adults Only sign over it. Ignoring the sideways glances of the men browsing—no, lurking—at the racks, she scanned titles that made her blush to her roots, and finally grabbed a tape with a soft-focused photo and no evident body parts.
Making sure only the motivational tape showed, she clutched the tapes close to her chest, pushed through the purple curtain…and ran smack-dab into Ross. The shock made her drop her sex-shop sack, spilling her brightly colored purchases on the carpet.
She stood there frozen for a second and Ross bent to pick up, then hand the items to her one at a time, examining each one. “Looks like you have a busy evening ahead of you,” he said, giving her the vibrator.
“Never you mind,” she said, shoving it into her bag, blushing furiously.
“And what are you renting?” he asked, snatching the tapes from her fingers. He held them high, out of her reach. “Hmm,
Firefighters in Flames
and
Getting What You Want NOW…with Tony Rockwell,
” he said, reading the covers. “I can see the firefighters—all those muscles and that big
pole
—but I had no idea you had a thing for old guys with bad dye jobs,” he said, handing the tapes back.
“Oh, stop it,” she said. “I’m experimenting, okay?”
“I’m kind of hurt you’re going with paraphernalia when I’m offering my fleshly self.”
“I’m exploring…um…options.”
“Flaming firefighters? Please. You
are
chicken.”
“Am not.” She was so humiliated she just blurted, “Okay, smart guy. You’re on. Let’s go to your place and see about some rules.” What else could she do? He’d dared her and she had her pride. She’d find out what he had mind, at least.
The minute they got to his place, Ross started rushing through the apartment picking up stuff.
“Don’t fuss on my account,” she said. She’d been to his place numerous times and he’d never batted an eye when she had to push stuff off the couch just to make a place to sit. His frantic cleanup now charmed her.
His furniture consisted of funky items he’d scored at yard sales and nostalgia shops, along with things he bought off friends who needed money. He had a fish tank made from an old-fashioned clear gas pump in one corner and a Roy Rogers lamp-end-table ensemble next to an orange Naugahyde sofa.
Only the art was decent—fabulous, actually. Art photography, original oils and several sculptures. His record albums—he collected vinyls of blues artists and had a mint condition turntable—were in orderly racks. Ross had taste, just no concern.
Cords from three video game controllers were tangled in the middle of the floor and the couch cushions were propped against the cocktail table—backrests for gamers, no doubt. “Mind if I put these back?” she asked, picking up a cushion.
“Be my guest. I’ll get us a couple beers.”
She sat down on the recushioned couch and thought about what she might be doing—having sex with Ross. She shivered.
She did want to learn to separate sex from love, and she’d been attracted to Ross from the day they met. She’d always envied the women who knew him as a sexual partner. Then there was the thrill of knowing he wanted her enough to plan ways to convince her to do it.
But what about their friendship?
Maybe being friends would make it easier, like he said. It would save time, get past all those awkward getting-to-know-you moments….
Was she losing her mind, thinking of sex with Ross as an efficiency measure? Maybe the ground rules would convince her. Or scare her off.
The hand she used to take the beer from Ross shook so badly that he put the bottle on the table, sat beside her and rubbed her cold fingers between his warm ones. “Don’t be nervous, Kara.” He looked into her eyes. His were velvet green with brown lace. Hazel, except sexier. “We’ll take it slow. Nice and slow.”
A shiver crawled up her spine. “How about those ground rules?” she said, extracting her hands to go for the notepad she kept in her purse.
“Let’s just talk, okay?” he said, taking away the pad and pen. “We’re friends, remember? Friends talk to each other.”
“Right.” She took a deep breath and blew it out.
“You’re blotching. You always blotch when you’re nervous.” He studied her a moment longer. “I do know you,” he said on a sigh, and thrust the pad at her. “Go ahead and write. You’ll jitter if you can’t.”
Relieved, she labeled the list
Sex with Ross—Ground Rules.
“Okay. Number one.” Before Ross could suggest something, she said, “Friendship first.”
“Absolutely,” Ross agreed. “Nothing gets in the way of that.”
She wrote it down. “How can we be sure?” She frowned.
“That’s rule number two,” he said. “The minute either of us feels weird, we quit. No questions asked, no harm, no foul.”
“Maybe that will work.” She wrote it down, then bit her lip.
“Rule number three,” Ross continued. “Stay focused on the goal.”
“Goal? I’ve never heard you use that word,” she said.
“Let’s say I’m motivated,” he said with a suggestive lift of his brow. “The goal is to show you how to have fun with sex.”
“But it can’t just be me. You have to have fun, too.”
“Oh, I’ll have fun. Don’t you worry about that.” He gave her that look again.
She shivered again.
“Next, this can’t interfere with dating other people,” Ross said. When she looked at him quizzically, he shrugged. “There’s a hottie I’m working on at LG Graphics.”
“And who could forget Lisa, the accountant with the high IQ from the Upside? You’re such a hound,” she chided. But then added, “Actually, that’s perfect. If I know you’re seeing other people, I couldn’t possibly get attached.” This just might work. “Number five is we have to be honest,” she said, writing the words
BE HONEST
in all caps. “No being polite just to please the other person.”
“And if we’re not sexually compatible, we quit. That’s number six, I guess.”
She stopped, her pencil in midair. “You think I’m boring, but I’m really not. The granny panties were only because—”
“Relax.” He chuckled. “I just mean sex is like dancing—sometimes your rhythms don’t match. No biggie.”
“I guess so.” She frowned, worried.
“I’m sure we’ll be fine. You’re hot, I’m hot, we’ll be hot together.” He winked. “Oh, and if there’s something you want me to do—sexually—you just say it and I’m there.”
“Okay, but nothing too racy.”
“Nothing you don’t want,” he said, but his eyes said,
Or that I can’t talk you into.
She gulped. “I guess. But if it gets too, um, complicated, I can quit, no questions asked, right?”
“Rule number two, remember? No harm, no foul. Any more rules you can think of?”
“You’re positive about rule number one? Friendship first?”
“Absolutely. I couldn’t survive Siegel on the rampage without you keeping me from putting my foot in my mouth. Anything else?”
She pondered, taking a deep swallow of her beer. This was completely new territory for her, so she had no idea what rules she might desperately need at some point. “One more,” she said. “If we need a new rule at any time, we can add it.”
“Oh, God. The Queen of Revision appears. Now this feels like work.”
“Being flexible is a good thing,” she said.
“Mmm, I’ll say. I know a woman who can lift her ankles way up to her—”
“Stop it, you’re scaring me,” she said, slugging him. “I’m no contortionist, so don’t expect anything spectacular.”
“You might surprise yourself,” he said, low and sexy. “We might unleash a tigress.”
A nervous giggle erupted from her. “I’d settle for a sex kitten.”
“Oh, me, too. With sweet little claws that dig in just this side of pain.”
Her insides heated up. “Anyway, I guess that’s it,” she said. “Shall I read them back to you?”
“I got it,” he said, “and you do, too.”
“Okay, then.” She slid her notepad back in her purse. She’d make a copy for both of them later.
Then, there she was, sitting knee to knee with Ross, with nothing to do but look into those hot green eyes and wonder about the woman with her ankles up to her whatever. She grabbed her beer bottle to take a drink and banged it into her teeth. “Ouch.”
“Careful with that thing,” he said, taking the beer from her icy fingers and putting it beside his on the table. He extended his arm along the couch behind her and scooted closer. “All this talk has me in the mood. How about we get started?”
The only light in the room was the golden glow through the stretched rawhide on Ross’s Roy Rogers lamp. Romantic in an adolescent kind of way. And Ross smelled good, she noticed—clean and fresh with a sporty scent. He had such a sensuous smile. And he wanted her. Would she disappoint him? Suddenly she wasn’t ready. “It’s getting late. Maybe we could start fresh on Saturday.”
“No time like the present, Kara,” he said, his eyes raking over her in eager appraisal. “Don’t you always say procrastination is the enemy of progress?”
“Not fair to use my work ethic against me.” He was right, though. If she waited, she’d have Thursday and Friday and all day Saturday to get nervous. She did need to learn how to keep things casual. If not Ross, then who? Someone she’d have to start fresh with. Why not now? “Okay,” she said. “Let’s do this thing.”
“You make it sound like a project.”
“No. I don’t mean that. I’m just—”
“Nervous, I know. How about a little atmosphere?” He leaned past her and pushed a button on a remote. The gravelly voice of a seventies singer known affectionately as the Walrus of Love swelled into the room.
“God, you’re using your warm-up move on me,” she said. He’d told her of the magical effect Barry White on auto-play had on women.
“Sorry,” he said. “I go with what works.”
“Try to stay fresh for me,” she said. “In honor of our friendship?”
“Deal.” He leaned in and she braced for a replay of last night’s kiss. Except he went for her neck with a soft, nuzzling motion. Mmm.
Women love you to mess with their necks
—another tidbit from Ross’s repertoire. It did feel good and her body started a slow melt until she remembered the woman Ross had dated whose leg twitched just like a dog’s when he hit a certain place. Kara burst out laughing.
Ross stopped, frowned. “What’s so funny?”
“Sorry. I just remembered Lorraine. Wasn’t she the one with the twitching leg?”
“Yeah, right. Focus, okay?”
“Sure. Sorry.”
“Let’s do something I know you’ll like.” He moved in for a kiss. It started like the Tuesday one, then got better. Everything inside her went soft and melty. She leaned in closer. Ross’s hands slid up to touch her breasts. Sooo good.
Then he started patting her chest. He broke off the kiss. “Is that one of those water bra thingies?”
“What if it is? Come on.” She went for his mouth again.
“You don’t need that fake thing. You have perfectly good breasts.”
“The darts are big on this blouse. I need some padding. Just ignore it.”
“Right,” he said. He shifted her body so she was lying on the sofa and he was half on top of her. Lovely, but she kept thinking this was just the next step in his usual mating ritual.
“You’re so beautiful,” he said.
“Is that a line?”
“Of course not. You
are
beautiful. Your contacts show off your eyes. Crystal-blue. Nice shape—kinda almond.”
“Thank you.” It was glorious to hear compliments like that from Ross. This situation had tremendous potential.
“Remember the time that guy licked your eyeball and swallowed the lens?” Ross said.
“Yeah,” she said. “Never date a man who still lives with his mother at age thirty. They get strange.”
“Enough talk. We’re losing momentum here,” he said.
“Right.” She pulled him down for a kiss.
“Mmm,” he murmured, “that’s what I’m talking about.”
She felt a momentary thrill, then she noticed a lump behind her head. She reached around and fished out transparent red bikini panties. She held them out. “Either you’ve got some explaining to do about your wardrobe or one of your ladies left a souvenir.”
He shrugged. “Suzee forgot, I guess.”
“How could she forget her underwear?”
“Ah, honey, I get them so hot they forget their own names.”
“Pul-eeze. You may be good, but, trust me, a woman knows where her underwear is at all times. She left this to mark her territory.”