From Sanctum With Love (Masters and Mercenaries Book 10) (40 page)

“So I was right and Senator McDonald was a member of The Collective,” Mia said.

Kori’s stomach was in knots. What did any of this have to do with why Kai needed to clone Mia’s phone? “But you’re wrong about McKay-Taggart working for him. They wouldn’t work for a corrupt senator. Big Tag is smart. He vets his clients.”

“He also loves subterfuge,” Erin said. “Once a spook, always a spook, I say. Ian vetted you, Mia. I’m sure he’s known all along exactly who you are, and I suspect that he thinks you’re working for The Collective.”

“He thinks my brother is one of them?” Mia paled a little.

Erin touched her nose and gave Mia a wink. “Now you’re catching on. We’ve been in a Mexican standoff without knowing it because the boys are dumb shits who would rather play spy games than sit down and think this out rationally.”

“Why wouldn’t he ask her?” Kori didn’t understand. She didn’t understand why they wouldn’t sit Mia down, and she definitely didn’t understand why they’d gotten Kai involved.

Except that Mia had been Kori’s friend and Kai had an in with Kori. If Case hadn’t been able to get close to Mia, which it looked like he hadn’t, then Kai could do the job. Which he had. He’d done his job with the cool precision of a McKay-Taggart operative and then he’d wanted out. He’d obviously found his work distasteful.

Erin sighed, her eyes a little weary. “Ian would love to believe that he’s a mystery to all of us. He’s not. I’ll tell you exactly what he was thinking. He was wondering if Blondie here wasn’t working for her brother. He hoped and prayed she was a plant so he could switch it all up on her and spy on Drew Lawless and maybe, just maybe Lawless would lead us deeper into the organization. He would have listened in, but only one name would have mattered. Oh, if Ian had really found something out, he would alert the authorities, but only if it wouldn’t compromise his mission.”

“I’m scared to ask what his mission is,” Mia admitted.

“They didn’t catch who killed Theo, did they?” There was only one thing that would drive Big Tag like this, that would make him single-minded and utterly ruthless.

“Theo was killed by some random asshole who got the jump on him because he fucked up,” Erin replied. “That man was meaningless. Going after that idiot would be like stomping on the bullet that pierced Theo’s heart. He was a tool. Maybe he died when we stormed the compound. Maybe he’s still some asshole’s lackey. I don’t know. I don’t care. I shot Senator McDonald through the brain. Put that in your story, Mia. I sat on a rooftop with a sniper rifle and waited until the perfect moment, and then I pulled the trigger. You would think I was angry at the time. That I was emotional. I wasn’t. True revenge is cold. It means you’ve got nothing left and all that will satisfy your icy heart is killing another human being. I would very much like to kill Hope McDonald. So would Ian. So would Case. So would Sean.”

Hell, Kori had no idea who Hope McDonald was but she kind of wanted to kill the bitch now. “Erin, I don’t think her brother knows.”

Mia’s face had hardened. “Ian Taggart is going to want a meeting with my brother. He’s going to ask him to go undercover.”

“Or to allow one of us to do it. I know how Ian thinks. I know what I would do. You’re a gift, Mia,” Erin said, her voice cold. “And you’ll get a hell of a story out of it. I think you should call your brother. Ian’s on his way over.”

Mia stood, flipping open her bag and pulling out her phone. She frowned as she looked at the screen. “Damn. I’ve got five messages from him. One of them says I should stop using this fucking phone. Awesome. They already figured out I’m compromised. I hate Case Taggart. I hope his balls shrivel up and die. Son of a bitch. I’ll never live this down. Do you have any idea what it’s like to have three insanely protective alpha male brothers?”

“I got a Taggart in my womb. You’re kidding me, right?” Erin snarked.

Mia calmed a bit. “I’m sorry for the trouble. I was suspicious. It’s a scary world out there. I wanted to make things better.”

Erin stood and held out a hand. “Then work with us.”

Mia shook it. “All right. I’ll get my brother on the phone. Apparently he’s waiting up. Or he might be on a plane already on his way here. Maybe we can get him and Taggart on a call. Is there somewhere I can talk in private?”

Erin gestured to the left. “My bedroom is in there. You can use it. After we pass this off to the boys, we can get some sleep. I’ll make up the couch for you and Kori can bunk with me. It’s a king-sized bed. I can share.”

Kori wasn’t sure she would be able to sleep at all.

Mia walked toward the master bedroom and Kori stood up.

“I’ll get the sheets and stuff. Are they in the hall closet?” She was willing to do anything to shut her brain down.

Why hadn’t he told her? If Kai had told her he was trying to track down Theo’s killer, she would have helped. She would have stood at his side and played her role, and they could have come out of this mess as friends. She would still have him in her life, still have a job, still have a home.

“I think we should talk before Big Tag gets here and the shit storm begins.”

Kori shook her head. “There’s nothing to talk about.”

“Oh, there is. Kai fucked up. He fucked up badly and I can see in your eyes that you’re going to run. I know because I would very likely do the same thing. What did you hear him say? I watched the tape, but there’s no sound.”

“He said he was done. He said he wanted all of this crap to be over so he didn’t have to deal with me anymore,” she admitted. “The thing is I would have done anything he asked. Why did he have to hurt me like that? And what did he think would happen afterward? Did he think he could walk in the next day and ask for a mulligan on the whole relationship thing? Did he think I wouldn’t notice that we’d stopped fucking like rabbits?”

“That doesn’t sound like the Kai I know,” Erin allowed.

“Yeah, well, the Kai I know wouldn’t lie to me. He wouldn’t use me. He put us all in harm’s way. Sarah didn’t have to go tonight. She didn’t have to fall in deeper with Jared, but Kai insisted because it suited his plans. He didn’t think about the rest of us. He didn’t care who got hurt as long as he did his job.” It was obvious who Kai’s loyalties belonged to and it damn straight wasn’t her.

“Men get odd when they’re working. Especially operatives.” Erin seemed strangely calm, as though the events of the evening had soothed her in some way.

“Kai isn’t an operative. He’s a shrink. He’s a yoga-doing, Zen-master shrink. He’s not some kind of spy.”

“Ah, but he’s in the brotherhood and you would do well to remember that. He did his time in the Army. He fought for his country, and no matter how many downward dogs he does now, deep down he’ll always be a warrior, and that makes him one of them.”

“One of them?”

“The brotherhood,” Erin explained. “I like to call it that. I’ll be honest, when I first joined up at McKay-Taggart, I almost quit a couple of months in because I know what it feels like to be on the outside of the brotherhood. I’ve got a vagina so no matter how hard I fight, I’m never really going to be one of them. The Army taught me that. Don’t get me wrong. The men I served with never treated me as anything less than one of the team. They valued me. The Army was where I found my worth. But the kind of men who willingly go and risk their lives for our country also tend to be the kind of men who throw themselves over a woman’s body when there’s a bomb in play. That’s the McKay-Taggart guys to a
T
. They will value me for my skills and when the time comes they will also throw my ass into the last lifeboat with their wives and children.”

Kori didn’t see the problem. “That doesn’t sound so bad.”

Erin sat back, her head resting against the comfy chair that used to be Theo’s. “I grew up trying to be a guy. I was the only girl among a family of men who didn’t know what to do with me. Hell, they didn’t really want me there at all. Some people would say my childhood bordered on the abusive. I went into the Army right out of high school because that’s what all Argents do. I learned how to be a soldier there and it bugged me that the guys in my team protected me. I thought it meant they didn’t respect me. I didn’t understand how to be a girl until I met Charlotte and Grace and well, everyone. I know it seems like I’m closer to Li than anyone else, but that’s because it’s easy to talk to him. He’s the brother I never had.”

“I thought you had a couple.”

“I had three. I had three awful, vicious, competitive brothers. Li is the brother I wish I’d had. And he’s hiding something from me. I trust him more than anyone in the world and he’s lying to me.”

Kori knew how that felt. “About what?”

“I have my suspicions,” Erin said softly. “Do you know what I’m going to do about it?”

With Erin it could involve violence. Lots of violence. “I think you should talk to him.”

“No. I’m not going to talk to him. I’m going to smile and pretend like I don’t know and then I’m going to stay the hell out of it because Liam would never hurt me. Case would never hurt me. Ian Taggart would rather die than hurt me. God, I wish I’d figured that out before my Theo died.” Tears pierced Erin’s eyes, but she held herself with a regal possession. “The men in our lives don’t think we’re soft when they protect us. They think we’re precious. And protecting us can mean more than stopping a bullet. It can mean a lot of things. I look in the mirror the last couple of days and I no longer recognize myself.”

“Erin, you’re still you.” Kori couldn’t imagine how hard this was for Erin to go through. She was still grieving and now she had to deal with a pregnancy. She had to face the reality of being a single mother.

“No, I’m not,” Erin argued. “I’m more now. Do you know what my first thought was when I found out I was pregnant?”

“Probably horror and fear.” It would be her first thought. She was happy Kai had at least protected her in that way. She wouldn’t end up raising a child he didn’t want.

“I thought I should get rid of it. I can’t raise a baby. I didn’t have a mom and my father was a piece of shit. What do I have to give some kid? Theo was the soft one. Don’t argue with me about that. I caught him listening to Taylor Swift more than once. Theo was the one who could love and nurture a kid. Then I thought hell, Alex and Eve probably want another kid. I could do that. I would know the baby had a good home.”

“Erin, I think you need to give this some time before you make a decision like that.” Somehow she knew Erin would change her mind.

“My decision’s made. It was made when I laid awake in bed a couple of nights ago and called this piece of Theo inside me TJ.”

Kori felt her heart clench. “Theo Jr?”

She nodded. “Theodora if it’s a girl. She might hate me for it, but that’s her name. I don’t think so though. I think it’s a boy. When I started calling the baby TJ I realized something. I realized if I was actually going to do this, I have to grow the fuck up. I have to. I can’t stay here in this place. I’m not talking about this house. This is my home. It’s where he wanted to live so we’ll stay here. I’m talking about me. I can’t be so angry all the time. I can’t rage at people who aren’t even here. I can’t allow monsters to hold me down anymore. My father was a monster. I’m still afraid of him. I’m afraid there’s a part of him in me. It’s the part that sees the worst in everything, the part that hates, the part that thinks the worst will always come because I don’t deserve any better. The part of me that looked at Theo and thought nothing that beautiful could be true. I never really had a mom. She walked out when I was a tiny kid because she couldn’t handle my dad. She left me there, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be a good mom. I’ve thought about this a lot. I thought about what I missed out on because she dumped me. I figured it out. Do you know what mothers do, Kori? They slay monsters for their children. Even the ones that live inside them. I’m not your mother, but I know when a person is wrestling with demons. This isn’t just about Kai.”

The tears were right there, but somehow they wouldn’t come out. They sat there behind her eyes, gated and kept inside as though she was hoarding them. “He said he wanted this to be over with so he could end this crap with me.”

“He used those words?”

“He told Case that he was happy to help, but this stuff with Kori had to stop. It made him sick. And then he told Case he couldn’t keep this up. I don’t think he was talking about his dick because he kept that up fine.”

One side of Erin’s mouth tugged up in a wry grin. “That’s good to know. So you’re pissed because he said some words that you might have taken out of context.”

When had Erin become the damn voice of reason? Before the whole pregnancy thing, Erin would have been right there with her, cheering her on and possibly teaching her how to load a gun. “How the hell else am I supposed to interpret those words, Erin? I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but I have to face the facts. He needed me in order to get close to Mia. Instead of asking for my help, he chose to deceive me. I guess he thought getting me into bed would make me more pliable or something. He went too far. He made me think he loved me. It doesn’t make sense. Why would they hide this? Why would he do this? Did they know about the fact that Jared might be a serial killer?”

“I suspect so,” Erin admitted.

Another betrayal. If they knew Jared could possibly be a killer, then they’d put everyone at Sanctum in harm’s way. The Doms were supposed to protect them, not use them for an op. “Then they put us in danger. I get that you all want to find this woman, but there was another way. If all they wanted was Mia’s phone, I could have gotten it for them a long time ago. I’ve been with her in training classes. I’ve been at her house. I could have done this.”

“Which means what? Come on. You’re a smart girl.” Erin stared at her and Kori was suddenly happy she’d never been in Erin’s crosshairs because there was something deeply predatory about Erin when she got serious. “They put the club in danger. Big Tag had to be in on that. He’s a reasonable man. If he thought he could get what he wanted by coming to you and asking you to do him a favor, wouldn’t he? He didn’t. Instead he kept his mouth shut and put everyone in danger. What does that tell you?”