Authors: The Hidden Heart
“My word, did he do so, then?” Lady Caroline asked, appalled and yet fascinated.
The earl nodded. “I did not at first believe that Swallow would do anything of the sort, but as the hours passed, I became more uneasy. I chanced to show the letter to Sinjin
,
who also knew Swallow, and he suggested that we go around to Swallow’s lodgings. Swallow was not at home, and he had not been since early that afternoon. After some debate, we went round to the young lady’s home. She was gone as well. Her family was half-crazed with worry. Sinjin and I spoke privately to the father, showing him the letter. He instantly called for his carriage, swearing that when he caught up with Swallow he would horsewhip him to within an inch of his life.”
Lady Caroline kept her eyes on the earl’s face. “You and Sinjin—you went after Swallow and the young lady.”
“Yes. Before we could get a team put to, the girl’s father had already gained a good lead on us. But Sinjin was always a better whip than anyone I’ve ever known. We quickly overtook and passed the irate gentleman.”
“Did you come up with them, then?”
The earl nodded. He moved his shoulders in a restless fashion as though to shift an unpleasant weight. There was a grim look about his mouth. “They had stopped at an inn and taken a private parlor. The staff was standing about, listening, as we walked inside. There was a hideous commotion abovestairs
,
the muffled screams of rage from a man and a woman, and the smashing of crockery. Sinjin and I ran up the stairs. We pounded on the locked door, but to no avail. We had decided to set our shoulders against the door, when a single piercing scream came from inside the room. Sinjin and I stared at one another, quite frozen. Then in a frenzy we attacked the door. The young lady’s father arrived while we were at it, and shouted us on, shaking his coiled whip over his head. There was a crashing report, and then utter silence. When we had beaten the door down, we found them, both quite dead. Swallow had stabbed the girl and then shot himself.”
“Oh, Miles. How utterly horrible,” Lady Caroline whispered, throat tight. She could not dare to begin to imagine the spectacle that must have greeted the horrified eyes of those who had entered the room. How truly horrible for the poor girl’s father. For Sinjin
,
and for Miles.
For Miles, she thought in awful comprehension. “I wondered, that Season, why you seemed changed. Oh, you were still amusing and witty, but somehow grown aloof. I did not understand it. I could not.”
“I had seen what lengths a man could be driven to by strong emotion. I had lost one who in some ways had stood for me as a brother. I was struck with horror that I might one day ...” Breaking off suddenly, Lord Trilby drew a long breath. He managed to summon up a smile, but one that did not quite reach his eyes. “In short, Caroline, I became terrif
i
ed of my own capacity to feel for others.”
“You became frightened of me.” Lady Caroline nodded, as though at a quite normal revelation. “Yes, I see. I quite see.” There was a blind look in her eyes. She was caught in the grip of an almost intolerable despair. She understood very well. Oh, how well she understood. The earl was attempting to explain to her, as painlessly and gently as was possible, that the hopes she had once harbored had become futile in that very Season she had fallen in love with him.
The long years had passed, but her hopes had remained, banked as coals beneath the ashes perhaps, but still warmed in the friendship that she had retained with the Earl of Walmesley
.
She could see now that those hopes had been utterly wasted.
Lady Caroline made a curious gesture. “I do not know quite what to say, my lord, except... I do understand what you are trying to tell me.”
Lord Trilby returned swiftly to sit beside her on the settee. He took her hands, though she resisted at first. She refused to meet his eyes, however. “Do you understand, my lady?” he asked softly.
She gave a jerky nod. “Of course. It is unfortunate that we must wait until the grandduchess is gone from England before I might safely jilt you, but—”
“Caro, I have been the greatest of fools these six years.”
Her started gaze flew to his face. “My lord?”
He smiled somewhat twistedly. “I do not wish to be jilted, my lady.”
“Do you not?”
The earl lifted one hand to touch her face. His fingers trembled. “When I think of the wasted years, Caro . . . Sinjin was right: someone should have married you years ago.”
Lady Caroline was held by the expression in the earl’s eyes, and the tightness about her heart began to loosen. Suddenly she felt herself to be winging back in time to her first Season. Her pulses tumbled erratically. “Yes, someone really should have.”
The earl slowly narrowed the distance between them. His lips touched hers tentatively. He drew back a little. “I have grown attached to our engagement, Lady Caroline.”
“Have you indeed, my lord?” she asked breathlessly.
Suddenly she was crushed in his arms. He kissed her thoroughly, with a hunger that had been denied for too long. Lady Caroline returned the earl’s passion with fervor, laughing and crying at once.
When he at last released her, her eyes glowed with the blaze of a thousand candles. “What means this ungentlemanly display, my lord?”
Lord Trilby slanted a brow. “I should have known you would demand your pound, my lady.” She but laughed and shook her head.
Lady Caroline would have returned to his arms then, but he held her away a bit longer. His voice deep and somber, he said, “I love you most earnestly and with all my heart, my lady. I have used you abominably, I know, and I am unforgivably behindtimes. But despite it all, will you accept my suit?”
“What of your fears, my lord?”
“I fear more your rejection, Caro.”
“I could not possibly spurn you, my lord, for I have loved you quite hopelessly for too many years. It is a wretched habit that I shall never be free of, I fear.”
The Earl of Walmesley directed a heart-stopping glance at her and caught her up in his arms at last.
Copyright © 1992 by Gayle Buck
Originally published by Signet (ISBN 0451172353)
Electronically published in 2009 by Belgrave House/Regency Reads
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This is a work of fiction. All names in this publication are fictitious and any resemblance to any person living or dead is coincidental.