Finally
, something to take her thoughts off Beck. “That’s awesome!” She didn’t have to fake or force her enthusiasm. “I’m so proud of you!”
He stared down at his lap, something he’d done all his life when he felt embarrassed, especially by praise. “Wasn’t hard.”
“I don’t care.
This
is why I rode you so much in high school, and why I still ride you now. So you can…” She wasn’t expecting to choke up. “So you can do what I couldn’t. All three of you.”
“When are you gonna go back to school?”
“I’m too old for that.”
“No you aren’t. There are people in my classes way older than you. People go back to school all the time.”
“That was seventeen years ago, I was in school. Nearly a whole life since. I wouldn’t know what to do. Maybe once I retire from driving.”
“You won’t retire,” he muttered, now staring out the window.
“What?”
“You heard me.” He faced her again. “You work your ass off for everyone but yourself, sis. It’d be nice to see you put that into you for a change.”
She didn’t have a reply to that, so she let it drop, the uncomfortable silence slowly expanding between them. When they got home, he headed to his room to drop his stuff off while Nami went to the kitchen.
Malyah turned from where she was washing dishes in the sink. “There you two are. I was about to call you. I was getting worried.”
The apartment smelled wonderful. “What’d you cook?”
“Roasted a chicken. Should be done any time now. Just cleaning up.” The small table was set and ready for them.
“Thanks, sugar.” Nami turned to go to her bedroom.
“Hey, Nami?”
“Yeah?”
“Did something happen today? Lu’ana called me.”
Nami worried if her eyes rolled any harder they’d pop out of her skull and bounce across the kitchen floor. “I’m fine. Rough day. Nothing more.”
“If you say so.”
“I say so.” Once Nami had safely closed herself behind her bedroom door, the shakes hit her. She heavily sank onto the bed, letting the strap of her purse slip down her arm.
Kicking off her shoes, she tried to get the scent of Beck out of her mind.
And the sound of his voice out of her head.
Mine.
Lord, how she wished it could be. There was no way she’d let some random stranger come in and upset all the hard work she’d put in through the years to make sure those three kids had as good a life as she could give them.
Even a stranger as handsome as Beck.
Chapter Nine
After Beck retrieved his car he headed straight for Dewi’s. He knew Martin would be there, too, going over things with Dewi and Badger. Bursting in, Beck located the four of them in the office. Martin, Badger, and Dewi stood staring over Ken’s shoulder at his laptop.
“I found her!” Beck crowed.
“You did?” all four of them parroted.
“Yes! Namiyah Drexler.” He opened her picture on his phone and showed them.
Martin frowned. “Okay, stupid question. If you found her, why are you not
with
her right now?”
“Not so stupid,” Dewi said, “because I’m wondering it myself.”
“I think we all are, lass,” Badger added.
“Ditto,” Ken said.
Beck realized they were all staring at him, waiting for an explanation. “I’m taking it slow.”
“Slow?” the four of them asked.
“Yeah, slow.” Beck stared at her picture again. “She’s scared. Terrified.”
Dewi and Badger exchanged a glance. “Um, Beeeeck?” Dewi started. “How are you going to get her used to you if you’re not, you know,
with
her?”
“I’m going to ride her bus every day, until she agrees to talk with me, alone.”
“What?” they all echoed.
“You four are starting to sound like the Stooges, you know that?”
“Lad,” Badger said. “Don’t ye think that’s a little unorthodox? Claim her already and be done with it.”
“Do you have her address?” Martin asked.
“Nope, but I have her license plate.” He pulled up the picture on his phone and showed Ken so he could note it. The man’s fingers started flying over the laptop’s keyboard.
A moment later, success. “According to the DMV,” Ken said, “she lives in an apartment in Carrollwood.”
“Great,” Dewi said. “Let’s go.”
“No,” Beck said.
They stared at him like he’d shifted into an octopus. “No?” they asked in unison.
“No. I’m going to ride her bus tomorrow. And the day after that, if I need to. And the day after that, even. As long as it takes.”
Dewi stared at him for a moment. “Why not just show up at her house and talk to her tonight?”
“Because I told you, she’s scared. I want to take things slow. I don’t want her to think I’m a creepy stalker.”
“Yeeesss,” Martin drawled, “because riding her bus all day, every day, isn’t creepy at
all
.”
Dewi, Ken, and Badger also wore equally dubious expressions. “Well, sure, when you say it like
that
it sounds creepy,” Beck admitted.
Dewi arched an eyebrow at him. “When
anyone
says it like that.”
“You don’t understand—”
“Beck,” Badger interrupted. “Yer starin’ at the four people on the face of the bloody earth who
do
understand. We just don’t understand yer decision-makin’ process here, lad.”
“Look, I can tell how scared she is. Let me do this my way. She’s
my
mate. Got it?” He realized after the words left his mouth how harsh they’d sounded. “Sorry.”
Martin was only twenty-nine, and while an Alpha, he was single and unmated. Beck didn’t expect him to understand. Dewi, however, was mated, and Badger…
Well, the old Prime Alpha widower wolf had experienced love and loss long before Beck had ever been born.
“I’d have no problems going with you,” Dewi said. “Act as a go-between for you. Maybe she’d feel less threatened with a woman there.”
“Yeah,
that’ll
work,” Martin snarked.
She turned on him. “What?” Dewi’s indignation had rankled her scruff just as surely as if she’d been shifted.
Ken laughed. “Babe, you’re not exactly a shrinking wallflower. There are a lot of words I’d use to describe you.
Non-threatening
isn’t at the bottom of the list, but it’s close.”
“And it’s a long damned list,” Badger added.
She threw her hands up in the air. “Okay,
fine
. You’re absolutely right, Beck. Your mate, your call. Enjoy freaking her the fuck out.”
She shoved past Beck and headed for the doorway, where she turned and jabbed a finger at him in the air. “Just know that if you get arrested for stalking, or creeping, or whatever, I’ll make sure to give Peyton the whole goddamned story when he personally has to come all the way from Idaho to bail your ass out of jail. Because I refuse for the four of us to have anything to do with it. Got it?”
She stormed out. A moment later, the four men flinched when they heard the door to the master bedroom slam shut upstairs.
“Aw, shit,” Martin muttered. “
Now
you did it.”
Ken pushed his chair away from the desk. On his way out, he stopped next to Beck. “Gee, thank you for pissing her off. Now I’m going to have to go distract her and calm her down.”
“What are
you
bitching about?”
“She’s damn near worn me out to the point of exhaustion over the past few weeks. I love her and would die for her, you know that. But I’m just a human, not a shifter.”
It was only after Ken had left the office that Beck connected those dots. “Oooohhh.”
Badger let out a snort. “I hope ye claim her soon, lad. Ye seem to have misplaced yer brains for yer bollocks.” He departed as well, leaving Beck and Martin alone in the office.
“You have something you want to add since everyone else is piling on?” Beck challenged.
Martin held up his hands. “Dude, I’m just sayin’. I think you’re going about this the wrong way, but you’re right. It’s your call.” He started around the desk for the door, then turned back to Beck. “By the way, I think I found a house today, not too far from yours. I’ve got an appointment to go look at it tomorrow afternoon with a realtor. So I should be out of your hair pretty soon.”
Beck grunted but gave no other reply as Martin left. When he heard the front door open and close, he knew the man was heading back to Beck’s house for the evening.
He sank into one of the office chairs in front of the desk. After staring at Ken’s computer, he reached out and turned it around.
On it was a search result from Google Maps, with Nami’s address plugged into it and a pin highlighting where she lived.
He could drive there in about thirty minutes, this time of evening.
No. I need to follow my instincts on this.
While part of him wanted to go pound on her door, grab her, and kiss her again, he knew that was absolutely the wrong way to go about this. Not without being an utter asshole in the process. Sure, he
could
go do that, but he’d feel guilty about it later, always wondering if she would have
chosen
to be his.
And he wanted his mate to actively choose him, not just fall for him because of whatever lupine love pheromones were at play. In his forty-nine years, he’d always felt a little…squeamish when he heard recounts of mating stories, even when they came from the female mates themselves. No matter that every one of them seemed happy with the final outcome, he didn’t want his claiming to be like that.
Wouldn’t
do it like that.
And he felt guilty he hadn’t done a better job instilling that ethic in Dewi, even if her story had a happy ending and Ken had no complaints.
He sent himself the Google search results, his phone vibrating a second later when the e-mail arrived. Then he looked up the HART schedules for Nami’s route. He wanted to make sure he was there at the Walmart plenty early enough to get on her bus. He emailed those to himself as well.
He headed for the kitchen to scrounge up some leftovers. Badger joined him a few minutes later.
“Yer determined to do this yer way, aren’t ye?”
“Yeah, I am. I think I have the right to claim my mate the way I want to do it.”
“Even if it’s stupid? Eh, yer way, not yer mate.”
“Even if it’s stupid.”
“Fine.” Badger crossed his meaty arms and stared at him. “But ye know ye can’t say anything to her about the pack until she’s been claimed, right?”
He momentarily froze as Badger’s words punched through his brain. He hadn’t really thought about it until Badger had said it, but yeah, Badger was right. Until she was claimed, that secret would have to stay secret. Which meant he couldn’t reveal a considerable amount about himself to her until he’d claimed her.
Dammit.
Beck put his dinner together and shoved it in the microwave. After setting the timer and hitting the start button, he turned. “What?” Beck finally asked when he couldn’t take any more of the older shifter staring at him.
“How many days ye plan to do this?”
“I don’t know, okay?”
“Keep in mind ye got a bigger role to play now than ye did even a couple of months ago. Yer part of the expanded pack council. There’s work to be done, and ye ain’t doin’ it. Not fair to ask Dewi to cover for ye when even she’s put pack before her own new mate, ye know.”
His piece said, Badger turned and left the kitchen. Beck heard him heavily stomp up the stairs and to his own bedroom.
While his food heated, Beck considered the man’s words. That was very true. By all rights, no one would have blamed Dewi had she taken Ken and headed off for a month or two of vacation time.
But she hadn’t.
Even when her mate had nearly been killed, she’d barely taken any time off, just a day or two until it was clear Ken would heal up and be all right.
What does it say about me that a woman nearly half my age has a better work ethic than I do?
It didn’t say very much, he thought. Especially when he’d known her from the time of her birth, and she was his boss, as well as his friend.
I’ll give it a week. If it takes any longer than that, then…
He didn’t know what he’d do. Forcing Nami was out of the question.
But he knew for the sake of his own sanity, he needed to resolve it.
And soon.
* * * *
Nami laid in bed and stared up at the dark ceiling overhead. She couldn’t go to sleep. She’d tried.
Every time she closed her eyes, Beck’s face came into perfectly clear view, complete with the sound of his sexy voice.
What the ever-lovin’
hell
is wrong with me?
Fortunately, she’d managed to put her siblings off the trail of anything being wrong in her life. Sort of.
She felt like she was living a double life.
In one corner, her existence up until Beck had kissed her…and her life ever since. It felt like she had a whole new life, a crazy one she couldn’t fathom, but part of her desperately wanted. Craved.
I can’t do this.