Geis of the Gargoyle (6 page)

"I learned that along the way," he admitted ruefully.
 
"I think I don't have the time.
 
You see, when it rains in Mundania, and the Swan Knee River starts flowing again, the dam will soon overflow, and I must be there to honor my geis."

'That is part of what I wanted to talk to you about.
 
A year will not do, for you; you have a responsibility elsewhere.
 
Instead, the Magician will settle for a single service of lesser duration, if that is satisfactory to you."

Gary began to realize that his mission might be possible after all.
 
"If I can return in time, then it's all right."

"But it is an unusual service, and you may not wish to perform it," she said.
 
"That's why I had to talk to you first.
 
The Magician's Answer is one thing, but the terms of the service are another.
 
If you are not willing to do it, your meeting with Humfrey is pointless."

"I'm willing, so long as it is brief.
 
What is it?"

"To tutor a precocious human child."

"But I don't know anything about humans, and less about their children," he protested.

"Precisely.
 
And this one is no ordinary child.
 
She will be extremely difficult to handle."

"I'm a winged monster! She'd think I was going to eat her! There must be a hundred better tutors for her."

"Apparently there is only one who can do the job in the manner it needs to be done.
 
I confess that my husband's dictations don't always make sense to me at the time, but he is invariably correct.
 
We need you for this."

Gary struggled, but could not come up with a suitable argument against this.
 
His soft heart was betraying him again.
 
"If she really needs my help-"

"She really does.
 
But there is more."

There always did seem to be more.
 
"What more?" he asked warily.

"You will have to be transformed to human form for the duration."

"Human form!" he cried, appalled.

"I realize that this is a considerable sacrifice for you, but it will be temporary.
 
Magician Trent will transform you, and transform you back after the service is complete."

"I suppose if it is temporary, I can stand it," he agreed grudgingly.
 
But privately he was wondering whether he ever should have listened to D.
 
Mentia, who had gotten him into a crazy fix.

"There is more," she said, with that tone.

"Are you trying to dissuade me from this?"

"No.
 
I very much hope you will accept it.
 
But fairness requires that you be warned.
 
In human form you will not be as competent as you are naturally, and your flesh will not be stone.
 
Your normal reflexes may lead you into mischief, such as assuming that thorns won't hurt or that dragon bites won't damage your flesh.
 
You will need Magician-caliber protection until you change back."

"But if you have a Magician for this, why can't he tutor the child?"

"Not he.
 
She.
 
She absolutely refuses to baby-sit a child alone.
 
Perhaps she has reason; she is ninety-three years old."

"But that's doddering, for a human! Flesh ages so much more quickly than stone."

"She will be youthened to an effective age of about twenty-three.
 
That's prime, for a human female."

Gary shrugged.
 
"Then I don't see the problem."

"There could be a personality conflict.
 
She is said to be not the easiest person to get along with."

Gary strained his stony memory for what it knew about human Sorceresses.
 
Only one bad name emerged.
 
"Just so long as it isn't the Sorceress Iris.
 
She is said to be impossible for anybody but her family to stand for more than two moments."

The Gorgon merely looked at him.
 
Her illusion face looked soberingly real.

Oh, no!

After a time he bowed to the inevitable.
 
"Maybe if the service really is brief ..."

"It should be.
 
I repeat, my husband's dictates can seem peculiar, but there's always a rationale.
 
It is quite possible that you will be glad of this experience, once it is over."

"I shall hang on to that hope," he said ruefully.

"Excellent.
 
Now it is time to see Humfrey."

"I will take him there," Wira said.
 
Gary had forgotten she was there.

He followed the young woman up endlessly winding stairways until they reached an obscure chamber buried deep within the castle.
 
A gnomish man sat at a desk, poring over a monstrous tome.
 
This was the Good Magician Humfrey; it could be no other.
 
He looked about a hundred years old.

"Father Humfrey, here is Gary Gargoyle," Wira said.

"Well, let's hear your Question," the gnome grumped.

"How can I more readily purify the water?"

"Get a philter." The face returned to the tome.

"But-"

"Now don't try to argue with him." Wira said urgently.
 
"That only makes him grumpier."

"But I have no idea where-"

"Ask Hiatus," Humfrey said without looking up from the page.

"Who is Interruption?" Gary asked as Wira guided him back down the tortuous stairway.

"Hiatus.
 
He's Lacuna's twin brother.
 
He grows noses and things on surfaces.
 
He must know where the philter is."

"But how can I find it, when I have to tutor this child?" he asked plaintively.

"Take her with you!" the Good Magician's annoyed voice floated after them.

"I suppose I can do that," Gary agreed.
 
"But this still seems perplexingly confused."

"Things usually work out in the end," Wira said reassuringly "Somehow.
 
Even if coincidence, chance, and common sense have to be inordinately strained."

Gary hoped that was the case.
 
Once more he wished that the demoness had left him alone.
 
His life had been simple; now it was unduly complicated.
 
But he also had to admit that it had been boring, and now it was interesting.

3

IRIS

Gary found himself outside the castle, with no idea where to go next.
 
In the confusion of the Good Magician's grudging bits of Answer, Gary had forgotten to get lesser information he needed.
 
Such as how to find Magician Trent or the Sorceress Iris.

He gazed at the moat and the mixed terrain beyond.
 
Would he have to find his way out as deviously as he had found his way in? And then search for the people he needed? It was all so confused.

"You look extremely perplexed," someone said behind him.
 
"I love that in a creature."

Gary didn't bother to look, because he recognized the voice.
 
"Shape up or ship out, Mentia," he said gruffly.

A small ragged brown cloud drifted into his field of vision.
 
"How did you know I was out of shape?" the demoness asked, disgruntled.

"I don't care about your physical shape," he said.
 
"I just mean that if you're not here to help, I don't want to bother with you.
 
I have enough problems already, thanks to your interference."

"My interference!" the cloud said, forming into a huge smoky exclamation point.
 
"Is this the thanks I get for trying to help you?"

"You want thanks? Here it is.
 
Thank you for not smoking in my presence."

The smoke solidified into the demoness' supposedly natural human aspect.
 
"Are you really annoyed with me?" she asked, looking woebegone.

Gary knew it was an act, but fell for it anyway.
 
"I guess not.
 
I know you thought you were trying to help me.
 
But now I'm stuck not knowing where to go, and not only am I far from my river, I owe the Good Magician a Service.
 
I wish I'd never met you."

Mentia sighed.
 
"I guess it was sort of crazy to think you'd be grateful.
 
But I'm a crazy creature.
 
Maybe I should help you some more."

"No!" he cried, alarmed.

"Not even if I showed you how to find Magician Trent?"

"Not even-" He paused.
 
"You'd do that?"

"And the Sorceress Iris too," she said sweetly.
 
"If that would make you feel good about me."

"Why should you care how I feel about you?"

"I shouldn't.
 
But I'm a bit crazy, as you know.
 
I'm not a bad creature, and you're an interesting one.
 
So maybe I'll get you clear of your confusion."

Gary didn't trust this, but seemed to have no viable alternative.
 
"Agreed, then.
 
Show me how to find Trent."

She paused to consider, her feet not quite touching the ground.
 
"The old folk are down in the Brain Coral's Pool, waiting for you.
 
So we'll have to go there."

"What kind of pool?"

"Oh, you don't know about that? I thought you gargoyles knew all about water."

"We purify running water," he said, slightly aggrieved.
 
"We ignore pools."

"This pool is not to be ignored.
 
The Brain Coral is a weird inanimate entity who likes to collect things, such as living creatures, which it keeps in suspended animation in its deep subterranean pool.
 
Once every decade or so it lets a creature out, if there's really good reason, and that creature is exactly the same age as it was when it went in, even if it's been there for several centuries.
 
Of course in the Time of No Magic, back in the year ten-forty-three, fifty-one years ago, everything got messed up and some captives escaped; it was decades before the Brain Coral completed its inventory and knew exactly who was gone." Menda shrugged in sections, like a moving caterpillar, her head, shoulders, breasts, midsection, pelvis, thighs, legs, and feet taking their turns.
 
The effect would have been interesting, had Gary been a human male.
 
"By then it was a bit too late, of course.
 
But there's still good stuff in those dark waters, and right now Magician Trent and Sorceress Iris are there."

"They are in the pool? In suspended animation?"

"Of course.
 
Do you think they want to wait in the regular realm, getting older every moment? Iris already has too much of a problem in that respect."