Livy was also too squeamish to flick a bug from her hair. Once after a joust on the Field of Honor, she nearly fell from the twenty-foot dais trying to get away from a mosquito. She’d probably faint if she saw the words on the wall.
But there had to be someone in that group who could either take a message to Chase or stay here until I took a message to him. I searched all the faces of the ladies, knaves, fools, and jugglers, but there was no one I recognized. I needed someone I could trust. Someone who wouldn’t faint or scream, alert everyone else, and generally cause a panic.
I stood there, hoping someone else would go by in the queen’s wake, but the procession came to an abrupt halt in front of me.
“Are we interrupting your day, young craftsman?” Livy smiled at me and batted her artificially enhanced eyelashes.
I seriously hoped there was a young craftsman behind me. But there were only the bloody letters on the wall. I bowed, playing the game.
Of course she’ll recognize me. Of course she knows I’m not a man she can flirt with
. “Of course not, Your Majesty. I am only awestruck by your beauty.”
Two of the ladies giggled. That wasn’t a good sign. I knew that giggle. I’d done it myself a few times. This looked very bad. I didn’t want to imagine what would happen if it went any further.
“You shall join our royal parade, young man, and tell us about yourself. Where do you hail from? ”
“I am from a goodly distance away, Your Majesty, and sworn to wait here for my master.” She couldn’t really believe I was a man, could she? I mean, I’m tall and everything, and I was wearing a man’s outfit. But really . . .
“Never mind your master.” She waved her heavily ringed hand in dismissal of my absent master. “You shall come with us. There is a party at the castle this eve. A
private
party.”
This couldn’t get any worse. I knew I was in serious trouble when Livy adjusted her large bosom, precariously set in the low-cut square neckline. She
was
flirting with me. What was the penalty for pretending to be a man during the Renaissance? What was the penalty for misleading the queen in Renaissance Village?
“There you are, you scamp!” Merlin was walking by in his starred, purple robe. He’d obviously been listening to our conversation. He might be the only one who could get me out of this mess. “I told you to wait over
there
. What are you doing over
here
? ”
“Prithee, Master Sorcerer.” Livy sidled up close to him, her wide hips swaying beneath the hooped skirt. “We are taking this boy with us. He would better serve the Village under our tutelage.”
Merlin raised one shaggy white eyebrow. “Good heavens, woman! This lad is barely old enough to be away from his mother. You can’t mean to dally with him! That would be
most
obscene.”
I wasn’t sure at first what Livy’s response would be. I knew Merlin did as he pleased in the Village. I’d never heard of him being summoned or cajoled into doing anything the king or queen wanted. He’d been here since before Livy and Harry took up residence in the castle. Maybe he had some kind of seniority with Adventure Land.
“Watch thy tongue, sir!” I could see by the look on her face that the queen was truly angry. “We shall not put up with your rudeness, sir, and shall speak to the king on this matter.”
Merlin bowed low, his gnarled hand on his staff. “As you wish, Your Majesty. I would advise the king to tread lightly in this matter. Neither you nor he want to anger me.”
The queen turned abruptly and reentered her group of courtiers. She gave me a very sweet smile before starting off again for her promenade. I realized I hadn’t breathed since Merlin entered the fray, and now took a big, deep breath. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, I suppose. I could ask why you’re dressed as a man, but I just passed what I believe to be a headless sheep. I may be incapable of asking such questions anymore. Who thought of creating a headless Halloween sheep costume? ”
I couldn’t help it. I laughed. It was good to be able to laugh with the queen out of my radar. “I suppose one could inquire what Bo Peep was wearing if she was herding headless sheep.”
Merlin shrugged. “I don’t want to go there, my friend. What brings you to the Village at this time of year, Mistress Jessie? ”
“I thought the whole Halloween theme would be interesting. I’m apprenticing with Roger at the Glass Gryphon.”
“That’s not what I heard at tea today. Never lie to a wizard, my dear. We get very testy about such things. Who knows? You could end up a headless sheep yourself.”
News, as always, traveled through the Village faster than bytes across the Internet. “Okay. I lost that position, but I think I can get it back. Roger really likes me, you know. And I think something else ails the glassmaker.”
“Come tell me about it over some pizza at Polo’s. I’m famished. Magic takes a lot out of you.”
“I can’t.” I moved away from the writing on the wall. I wasn’t exactly big enough to hide it, but I must’ve been doing a good job since no one in the Royal Court had noticed it. “I have to save this for Chase.”
He glanced around. “Save what? Has another visitor had a heat spell put on them by one of those crafty fairies? ”
I turned to make sure the writing was still there. Of course it was. The red bloodlike substance was even beginning to ooze down the wall. It creeped me out looking at it. “The writing. Didn’t you notice it? ”
Merlin stared at it briefly, then looked back at me. “Must I relate the story of the headless sheep again to you, my dear? You know you seemed much smarter last year. A little faster on the uptake, if you know what I mean.”
“This isn’t part of the Village Halloween event.” I finally understood his confusion. “Didn’t you hear about Death getting killed yesterday? The same words were written on him. The police said it was real blood, too.”
“Like the message written on the glassmaker’s wall earlier today? ”
“No. That was strawberry jelly. This is the real thing, I think.”
“You
think
?” Merlin strode past me, his purple robe flying out in a way that made me avert my eyes. He was known for flashing a little occasionally. He walked up close to the wall and put his finger in the red goo, then put the digit into his mouth. “Hmm. Type A, I’d say. Of course, a good O can be difficult to pin down. Definitely from the area though. High salt content, you know.”
I took back everything I ever said about Livy being squeamish. I almost lost it right there in front of the crazy Village sorcerer. It was bad enough when Chase had done it, but at least that had been jelly (which he’d said he could tell before he tasted it). “
Eww
. That is totally the worst thing I’ve ever seen.”
“But now we know.” He nodded his stately white head beneath the ridiculous purple pointed hat. “As you might suspect, we should call in the bailiff.”
“I know. I’ll go find him if you’ll wait here so no one will bother the writing.” As I was speaking, Merlin was pulling one of the Village-issued radios from somewhere inside his robe. I don’t want to know where. “Oh, that’s great. You get a radio. Chase gets a radio. Roger has a radio. Probably Fred the Red Dragon has a radio. I must be the only person in the Village that doesn’t have a radio.”
“Hardly. And the dragon doesn’t have a radio. You can rest easier now, Jessie.” Merlin explained the situation to Chase. When he’d finished, he said, “You’d better get over here, boy. Queen Olivia was here hitting on your girlfriend. Or is that boyfriend? In any case, you’d better get over here.”
Chase arrived a few minutes later. Lonnie took pictures of the wall. “Detective Almond can’t get over here right now,” Chase explained. “He said to take pictures and save some of the goo from the wall.”
“I feel certain this is nothing more than people with bad taste copying what you found on poor Ross’s body,” Merlin replied. “I believe you’ve both taken it too seriously. You know how it is around here.”
I
did
know how it was: crazy. “So maybe we’re looking for somebody with a bad sense of humor and not a killer.” That thought brightened my day. I didn’t care for the idea that there was a killer on the loose in the Village, especially not right now when the familiar had become unrecognizable.
“I hope so,” Chase agreed. “Lonnie, can you send that picture to the police for me? ”
“Sure, I’m good with computers.”
“Thanks. I’ll scoop up some of this stuff, and then I guess we can go. It’s getting dark. I expect all hell to break loose once the night settles in. And I mean that literally.”
Merlin said his good-byes and started back to his apothecary shop near the big first aid station and the entrance to the castle. Chase dispatched Lonnie with the red goo from the wall and the camera.
“What made you take Lonnie on as your assistant?” I asked as we strolled toward the Lady of the Lake Tavern. I could already hear the cannon fire, a nightly occurrence, from the pirate ship as they set off a few rounds at sunset.
“It wasn’t my idea. I guess Livy and Harold decided I needed some help. Lonnie showed up at the dungeon with a letter from Adventure Land headquarters telling me that he was officially mine. He’s a useful little guy. He can do almost anything I need him to do.”
“He was at Sir Latte’s for a couple of years, but they kept him in the back. Probably that snorty laugh. I guess that doesn’t bother you.”
“Not really. I thought they’d choose Jeff if they decided to pick anyone as my assistant. You know how well we worked together at the stocks last summer. But he walked off one day about a week after you left in August. No one’s seen or heard from him since. No telling where he’s gone.”
“I’m sure there are whole files of people who’ve worked here and left.” I watched as the pirate ship sailed across Mirror Lake, past Eve’s Garden where they did demonstrations on plants and herbs used in the time of the Renaissance.
The full white sails billowed out in the breeze that rustled through the trees as the sun sank beyond the horizon. It was a thrilling sight, even in modern times. The pirate ship, the
Queen’s Revenge
was as close to an exact replica as could be built. She was a fine piece of living history, except that her script called for several attacks on the tavern and smaller shops around the lake each day.
The anguished howl of the lone wolf sounded again through the streets and beyond. I shivered and moved closer to Chase. “You know that’s a recording like my banshee, right? ” He laughed at me. “You don’t have to worry about being eaten on the way to supper.”
At that moment, two tall, hairy, wolf-headed creatures wearing only ripped pants ran past us, slobbering and panting as they went.
“You were saying?” I moved to the inside of the street closer to the shops.
“You’re going to let them eat
me
first? ”
“You’re the one who said they didn’t exist.”
“I think you have too much imagination for your own good, Jessie. Maybe Halloween wasn’t such a great time for you to be here.”
“Don’t be silly! I know this stuff isn’t any more real than Livy’s red hair or Princess Isabel’s bosom.”
We’d reached the Hanging Tree near the tavern. Sometimes they hung a few pirates up in the tree, supposedly for the evil they’d done. It was a traditional warning to other pirates back during the Renaissance. Tonight, however, there were skeletons in the tree. The breeze rattled the fake bones (at least I assumed they were fake) above us and made the cages that usually held the pirates creak.
Imagination or not, this was scary. Maybe Chase was right. Maybe I was better off as a fun time, summer worker. I’d never imagined the terrible things the Village artistic directors could think of would be so real.
The Lady of the Lake Tavern was symbolized by a figure dressed in blue, half woman, half fish but not really a mermaid type creature either. She held a nasty-looking sword in one hand and usually a tankard of ale in the other. The wooden sign had been modified for Halloween so that the tankard was covered by a head.
“Oh, that’s nice. Just what someone wants to see before they go in to eat.” I looked around the building, which was painted a shade of blue to match the fish creature’s dress. There were wide windows on the ground floor with tiny panes of glass. Viewed through these multiple window panes, the lamp-lit diners in the tavern looked surreal.
“You know, maybe this is a bad idea,” Chase said before we went inside. “We could grab a sandwich or something on the way back to the dungeon and eat there.”
“Probably halfway there, someone would need you for something and I’d get stuck eating alone. At least here, there’s bound to be some excitement.”
He put his arm around me. “Don’t worry. I’ll protect you from the real, and the not so real. If I can tell the difference.”
“Protect me? ” I demanded. “I’m the man who defeated the Devil. Don’t you forget it.”
“Shh. Not so loud. You don’t want to start the huzzahs again, do you? ”
We were early for dinner (and we’d pay for it) as our hostess reminded us right away. Residents could get free food after the Village closed, but before then we paid like the visitors.
I slid into a small wooden booth in the darkened room. There were lanterns and candles everywhere. It’s always amazing to consider how anyone got anything done before electricity. This place was darker than Peter’s Pub or the Pleasant Pheasant. It was probably the big wooden beams that seemed to press down on the dining area.
Luckily, we got a window seat overlooking the lake. The lake was artificial, too, but like the pirate ship, it put on a good show. The rising moon was peeking over the castle, the entire picture reflected in the still water. Torches were lit on the ramparts and across the battlements of the castle and the Great Hall. It was an awe-inspiring sight.
“Good table, huh?” Chase mentioned as he looked at the menu, which was burned into a wooden slab.