Ghost Town (30 page)

Claire felt like her heart was breaking. Really, truly shattering into sharp, jagged, bloody pieces. She wanted to scream, and cry, and most of all, she wanted this
not to be happening
. She couldn’t bring herself to say anything, and he ignored her totally to look around. He found his pants and T-shirt, and awkwardly put on his pants under the cover of the blanket before dropping it. Before he got his shirt on, he turned back to look at her, and it
hurt
, it hurt so badly to have him see her like that and not know her at all.

Her utter, horrified misery must have shown in her face, because his expression softened a little bit. He took a couple of steps toward the bed and said, “Um, look—I know. . . . I’m sorry; I’m probably a complete douche bag for doing this to you, and I promise, this isn’t . . . I don’t really get drunk off my ass and hook up like this, and you seem . . . you don’t seem like the type. I mean, you’re pretty; I don’t mean you’re not—I’m sorry; I suck at this. But I have to get home, right now.” He pulled his shirt on and looked for shoes, which he slipped on without socks or even bending over to tie them. “Look, I’ll call you, okay? Uh . . . your name is . . .”

“Claire,” she whispered, and tears broke free and started streaming down her face. “My name is Claire. This is my fault.”

“Hey, don’t do that, don’t—I’m sorry. It’s not your fault. You seem”—he bent over and awkwardly kissed her, and it felt like he was a stranger—“nice. I promise I’ll talk to you later. We’ll figure this out. Oh, Jesus, did I have a . . . Did we take precautions or . . .” He shook his head. “Not now. I can’t think about this right now. I have to go. Later.”

“Wait!” she wailed, as he opened her bedroom door and ran out down the hall. “Shane,
wait
!” He didn’t. She grabbed up her jeans and shirt from the floor, threw them on, stepped into her shoes, and ran after him. “Shane, please don’t—”

He was standing in the living room, staring around, and when she came clattering breathlessly down the steps, he turned to look at her again. This time he didn’t seem as confused. But he didn’t seem to be back to himself, either. “This is Michael’s house,” he said. “What are we doing here?”

“Shane—Shane, please listen to me; we
live
here! With Michael! And Eve!”

“Keep your voice down!” He made frantic shushing motions at her, and lowered his voice even more. “Okay, you seemed nice, and now you seem a little bit whacked. We don’t live here. Maybe
you
live here—maybe you’re some cousin or something; I don’t know—but
I
live with my parents and my sister. Not here.”

“No! No, your parents—” Oh,
God
. What was she going to say? What
could
she say? Her mind went completely blank. He waited, then held up both hands and backed away.

“Whatever, crazy chick who maybe lives here and maybe also breaks into Michael’s house when they’re all gone. I’m out. Have a nice delusion.”

She couldn’t let him go; she just couldn’t. As he walked down the hall, she ran after him. “Shane, don’t. Don’t go home. You
can’t
!”

He didn’t even argue with her at that point; he just opened the front door and walked out into the morning sun. She hesitated in the doorway, wondering if she should go back and get her backpack, get
something
, call
someone
, but he was walking fast, and she had no idea where the old Collins house had once been. He’d never once told her, or pointed it out to her.

She locked the door and started following him.

Shane never looked back; maybe he knew she was there and was determined to ignore her—she wasn’t sure. She kept a good distance between them, careful not to look
too
creepy and stalkery, but it couldn’t be helped. If she let him out of sight . . .

He turned the corner up ahead, and when she hurried to catch up, she saw him sprinting, putting a lot of distance between them, fast.
No, no, no!
If she lost him now, she might never find him again. It was too terrifying, not only for her, but for him. He just didn’t know it yet.

She was passing an alley, sure he was still up ahead, when Shane grabbed her and slammed her hard up against the side of a building. She hadn’t realized in a long time just how big Shane was, or how strong. Or how he usually didn’t show it, unless he wanted to. Like now. There was a fire in his eyes, and an angry, stubborn set to his jaw. Shane in fighting mode.

He pinned her in place for a long moment, as if he were trying to decide what to do.

“Enough,” he said then, and let go. “Look, I don’t want to hurt you, but you need to stop following me. It’s creepy and weird. Walk away, or next time I’m not going to be so nice about it.”

“You wouldn’t hurt me,” Claire said. “I know you wouldn’t.”

“Yeah, well, don’t count on it. I don’t like hitting girls, but it doesn’t mean I won’t hit back if you start the fight. Ask Monica.” He frowned then, and she saw real anger in his eyes. “Monica. Did she set this up? What was it, some kind of roofie thing; she took pictures? She’s going to Facebook the hell out of it? Blackmail me?”

“No. I don’t have anything to do with Monica.”

“Bullshit,” Shane said bluntly. “Stop following me. I mean it. And quit crying; it’s not going to work.”

He walked out into the sunlight and kept going. She didn’t know what to do. She knew he meant it; she
was
acting weird and crazy and dangerous, and in Morganville, nobody could afford to ignore that. So he’d probably do something if she followed him. Maybe even get her arrested.

She didn’t care, but there had to be some other way.
Something.
She couldn’t just let him go.

A woman passed by on the street, looking confused and checking the addresses of buildings. Probably trying to find a store that wasn’t there anymore. Claire waited until Shane was out of sight around the corner, and then walked up to the stranger. “Hello,” she said, trying desperately hard to sound polite and helpful, and not as deeply freaked-out as she felt. The woman gave her a distracted smile. She had on a bracelet, so she was a Morganville native, which was a relief. “Um, are you looking for something?”

“Oh, it’s so stupid. I think I got turned around,” the woman said. “Can’t understand how; I’ve been working here for years—Grant’s Dry Cleaner’s. I could have sworn it was . . . right here. . . .”

“Oh, I think it moved,” Claire said. “Isn’t it one block over now?”

“Is it?” The woman frowned, and Claire saw fear and confusion in her eyes. She wished she could help her, but she didn’t know how, really. “Oh, that must be it. I can’t imagine why I . . . Guess I’m losing my mind. Isn’t that odd?”

We all are
, Claire thought, but she said, “I can’t remember anything before I have coffee,” and smiled. The woman looked a little reassured. “Um, maybe you can help me? I was looking for Frank Collins’s house; I think it’s around here somewhere?”

“Oh, Mr. Collins.” The woman didn’t look as if she were very fond of him, but she nodded. “Yeah, he and his family live two blocks over, then one block to the left. It’s on Helicon Drive. Big two-story house.”

“Thanks,” Claire said sincerely. “I hope you get to work okay.”

“Oh, I will. Maybe I’ll just stop for coffee first, though.”

Claire gave her a little wave and took off running. The lady called after her, “Dear, you’re going the wrong way!”

“Shortcut!” Claire yelled back.

Now that she knew where the house should be, she cut along a side road and through a couple of alleys—dangerous, but necessary if she wanted to avoid looking like she was following Shane again. She ran hard, and came out on the right road, and a block farther over, just as he came walking from the other direction.

There was a big, ugly empty lot in the middle of the street between them, with a rusted, leaning mailbox. The lot was overgrown with weeds, but the remains of a house were still there . . . cracked concrete foundations, some steps leading up to a door that wasn’t there. Nothing else but some burned pieces of wood too big to haul away easily. Claire stopped and stood where she was, watching as Shane came toward the lot . . . and stopped.

He looked at the ruins, then at the mailbox. Then at the cracked foundation again. Finally, he opened the mailbox to look inside. The door fell off of it, but he found some aging, yellowed papers inside.

Bills. With his family’s name on them, Claire guessed. He stared at them, shook his head, and slowly put them back into the box.

She saw it hit him, the same way it had hit all the others—the knowledge that things weren’t like they were supposed to be. That time wasn’t where it should have been. That everything was wrong.

He staggered and tried to catch himself against the mailbox, and knocked it over into the weeds. Shane frantically tried to pick it up, fix it, make it right, but the post was rotted through, and he finally had to lay it down. Then he sat beside it, holding his head in his hands, shaking.

Claire walked over, very slowly. “Shane,” she said. “Shane, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know how to tell you. I’m so sorry.”

“My house,” he whispered. “It’s here. It’s supposed to be
here
.” He looked up at her, and there were tears swimming in his dark eyes. “Something happened. What
happened
?”

She felt sick, and she loathed every second of what she knew she was about to do to him. “There was a . . . an accident.”

“Where are they?” Shane asked, and looked at the devastation where his life had once been. There was a rusted swing set in the back, bent and broken. “Alyssa. Where’s Alyssa? Where’s my sister?”

Claire reached out a hand to him. “Get up,” she said softly. “I’ll take you.”

“I want to see my sister! I’m responsible for her!”

“I know. Just . . . trust me, okay? I’ll take you.”

He wasn’t in any shape now to be angry, or even suspicious. He just took her hand, and she pulled him up to his feet and held on, leading him down the street and on. The sun blazed down warm, but the breeze felt colder, bringing winter in short, sharp bursts.

“Where are we going?” Shane asked, but not as if he cared much. “I can’t believe . . . It must have happened last night when I—”

“Shane, you saw that. The weeds are waist high. The mailbox was rotted out. There’s nothing there.” Claire pulled in a deep breath. “It’s been years since that happened. It didn’t happen overnight.”

“You’re cracked.” He tried to pull free of her, but she held on. “It’s not true. I was there
yesterday
!”

“Listen to me! God, Shane,
please
! I know you think it was yesterday, but it’s been a long time. You’ve been . . . other places. You just don’t remember right now.” She swallowed a lump in her throat and tried to go on sounding brave and calm. “You’ll be fine. Just . . . trust me.”

“Take me to my family.”

“I’ll take you to Alyssa,” she said. “Please. Trust me.”

She knew the way.

The graveyard was cold and silent, and the wind felt even more like winter here, even with the sun sparkling off of granite head-stones and white marble mausoleums. The grass was still a little green, but mostly brown.

The headstone read, ALYSSA COLLINS, BELOVED DAUGHTER AND SISTER, and it gave her dates of birth and death.

Shane read it, and his face went white and very still. His eyes seemed strange when he looked at Claire. “It’s not true.”

“I’m sorry,” she said. “But it is.”

“It’s a sick joke.”

“No,” she said. “Shane, Alyssa died in the fire. She died three years ago, before you left Morganville with your mom and dad. Before I ever came here. I know you don’t remember that, but it happened. You left town, and you came back, and you moved into Michael’s house with him and Eve. Then I came and moved in, too.”

“No,” he said, and took a big step back, then another one. He almost ran into another headstone, and braced himself when he staggered. “No, you’re lying; this is some sick little game of Monica’s, but this is low even for her—”

“Shane, Monica didn’t do this, and it’s not a game! Shane!
Listen!
”

“I’ve listened enough to you!” he yelled, and shoved her so hard she fell and almost cracked her skull on Marvis Johnson’s memorial stone. “You stay the hell away from me and my family, you crazy bitch! This is
sick
! This is
fake
!”

He tried to push over Alyssa’s tombstone. It didn’t move. He kicked at it, panting, and Claire lay where she was, watching him, heartsick. She’d thought maybe this would convince him, maybe it would force him to remember . . . but he didn’t. He couldn’t.

“Please,” she whispered. “Please stop, Shane. Stop hurting yourself; I can’t stand it.”

He collapsed against his sister’s tombstone and just sat there, his back to Claire. His shoulders were shaking. She got up and went to kneel beside him. He looked destroyed, just . . . broken. She put her hand on his shoulder.

He didn’t hit her, at least. He didn’t seem to notice she was still there. He was pale and shaking and sweating, and hunched in on himself as if somebody had punched him really, really hard. “She can’t be,” he said. “She can’t be dead. I just . . . I just saw her. She was making fun of my shirt. My shirt . . .” He looked down at himself, pulled his T-shirt out, and said, “I wasn’t wearing this. This isn’t even my shirt. This is wrong. This is all wrong.”

“I know,” Claire said. “I know it feels that way. Shane, please come back with me. Please. I’ll show you the room you have in Michael’s house. You’ll recognize some of the things in there; maybe it’ll help. Come on, get up. You can’t stay here; it’s cold.” He didn’t move. “Alyssa wouldn’t want you to stay here.”

“Why didn’t she get out?” he asked. “If there was a fire, how did I get out if she didn’t? I wouldn’t leave her. I wouldn’t do that. I couldn’t . . . just . . . run—”

“You didn’t,” Claire said, and put her arm around him. “You tried to save her. You told me, Shane. I know how hard you tried.”

He finally swiped at his eyes and looked at her. “I don’t even know you,” he said. “Why are you doing this?”