Going Down in La-La Land (28 page)

The next day my mind was taken away from Zinnia when I received a surprise call from Perry Bristol. He was to begin filming
The Voyeur
in a month, and true to his word wanted me to read for a part. The project was a behind-the-scenes comedy drama set in the world of gay porn, about a young and misguided aspiring filmmaker who becomes obsessed with a destructive male “gay-for-pay” porn star.

Though at this point I wanted to distance myself from the world of porn, I knew this film would be brilliant. And in a way, it could symbolize leaving that brief part of my life behind for other things. Besides, I hadn’t completely lost the acting bug that had driven me to come to LA to begin with, a desire that had been pushed to the wayside among all the craziness.

When I broached the topic with John, he was supportive. The role only called for me to be away from a few days work.

“
Take as much time as you need, Adam,” John told me.

I was to read for the role of Kurt Bottoms, a washed-up, bitchy porn star with an attitude. Seeing as how my last days with HUNG Video had turned out, finding motivation for the role wasn’t something I was worried about. The part was small and brief, but well written with some great lines. The bottom line was that it presented the opportunity to act in what I knew would be a good film, and perhaps the priceless chance to build an acting career.

Going to extra lengths to appear trashy for my audition, I went so far as to bleach my dark hair. Despite the fact it took my hair forever to take to the bleach, leaving my scalp fried with nasty scabs, the end result looked good. John thought it was sexy, which made me happy. Candy hated it.

“
Ugh. Why did you do that, Adam? It looks so cheap!” she said with brutal honesty.

“
Good. It’s supposed to look that way.”

The day of the audition I changed into a tight tank top and baggy gym pants, finishing off my smutty, West Hollywood hustler look. I arrived and was greeted by the casting girl, a spunky and friendly gal named Lisa. With glasses and a super casual look, she fit the profile of the typical production girl. I signed the audition list and took a look at the two other actors in the room: both spaced-out-looking young blond guys. I guess my instinct to bleach my hair was right on target.

Neither guy looked particularly interested or eager. Actually they looked uncomfortable. If anything they were most likely completely freaked out and put off by the explicit lines, that and the fact that the role called for a simulated sex scene, with the character of Kurt Bottoms getting fucked by one of the lead actors. Big surprise, considering I was up for the part. That might make most actors apprehensive about taking on this particular job. Let’s face it, this wasn’t the kind of part that Tom Cruise would have taken early in his career.

After waiting a few minutes to read, Lisa came to get me. Sitting in the room was Perry and Mitch.

“
Hey, Adam!” They greeted me simultaneously.

“
My rescuers, taking me away from the party turned ugly orgy!” I laughed.

“
No kidding,” Perry said grimly. “A good thing we left when we did, and that you’re not hanging with Dale anymore.”

“
What do you mean?” I asked. I suddenly got a sick feeling in my stomach, and my face got hot. I hadn’t heard Dale’s name since the day he attacked me.

“
He’s hit rock bottom, Adam,” Perry said in a quiet tone. “Things got so bad that sure enough, Ron fired him. I guess it was an ugly scene. He was throwing things around the office, the graphics guys had to restrain him and call the police. Last I heard he was seen around town getting thrown out of a bar. Hopefully somebody will get him in rehab soon.”

I didn’t say anything. It was too depressing.

“
Well, enough of that,” Mitch exclaimed turning the conversation around. “We have been dying to hear you read, Adam.”

I just hoped I could after getting so upset at the mention of Dale. I immediately began to block him out of my mind and get back to the matter at hand.

The first lines began with my character in a pool telling his costar that he’d better hurry with their scene, because he has a stripping engagement that night. From there it went into some really bad porn dialogue, which was fun to read. God knows I had seen some really dumb people in front of a camera firsthand. The day at HUNG Video where I handed out lubricant came to mind.

I also had lines in one other scene, and ironically the setting for this scene was Missy Manhandler’s birthday party. Within the gay porn industry, Missy’s birthday party was one of the most important social events. Therefore Perry was re-creating it in the film. He informed me that Missy was even making a cameo, singing on stage in drag and in all his outrageous glory.

It would be fun to see Missy again, this time in women’s clothes and fully made-up.

We read through the scenes twice. The first time I made the mistake of looking straight into the camera lens, instead of at Lisa, who I was reading my lines with. But I nailed the character perfectly, getting an enthusiastic reaction from all three of them. The second go was nothing less than perfect. I left feeling confident I had bagged the part.

The following day I had a message from Perry telling me all three of them thought I was perfect for the role, and it was mine.

The producers would be getting to me with all the necessary paperwork within the next week, being that I didn’t have an agent. For the next few days I waited, thinking about being in front of the camera again, in a legitimate and well-written film. I was being sent official papers from real, legitimate, producers!

Although there weren’t many big names involved, there was one famous person I was looking forward to meeting. She was one of my favorite female rock singers, and in one of the best new wave acts of the late 1970s and early 1980s before going solo. These days she did a lot of acting in independent projects like
The Voyeur.
Perry mentioned there was to be a cast reading within the next week, and would let me know the details in the next few days.

But before that time, I was to have my first and hopefully only run in with Zinnia. Luckily, before it occurred, Candy had done some snooping around.

“
Guess what!” I yelled at Candy over the phone. “I got a part in a movie! A true speaking part in a legit major movie!”

After I got done telling Candy the good news she said, “This must be your lucky week. It seems everything is going your way!”

“
What do you mean?” I asked.

“
I caught her! And not only did I catch her, but I caught her on camera!” Candy squealed.

At first I had no idea what she was talking about.

“
Caught who?” I asked, completely puzzled.

“
The despicable skank! The bane of your existence at the moment! Hollywood’s most notorious leech! Need I go on?” Candy huffed in exasperation.

“
Zinnia?” I gasped.

“
Bingo!”

“
What happened?” I asked in breathless anticipation.

“
Well, you know how I quit Crunch to go back to the Workout Warehouse?” Candy never did get over the see-through showers. “She still works out there. The Diesel model is still there too by the way. Man is he ever hot!”

“
Just get on with it!” I snapped.

“
Anyhow, my trainer tipped me off to the fact she does ‘business’ out in the parking lot, behind the building. So I’m sitting in my car using my cell phone, sure enough I see her there, yellow-green foundation and all. She is talking on her phone, and then a man in a suit approaches. If she was smart she would have conducted her little transaction in her car. By this time I hung up with my call. Sure enough, I see her pull out a white bag of powder and pass it to the guy. But not before snapping the image on my camera. And as clear as it can get on camera too!”

“
No way!” I said in astonishment.

“
Oh yes, and baby, I have the images in print for you to pick up at home!”

“
You know, you are truly amazing. You really are,” I said in all honesty.

“
Thank you doll! My pleasure. See ya shortly!” Candy cooed.

A few nights later Zinnia stopped by John’s unannounced.

“
Where’s John?” She snapped, without so much as a hello.

“
He’s putting in a long day at the set. Won’t be home for a few hours,” I said coolly standing by the door. “And hello to you, too,” I added.

“
I need to use the phone,” she ordered, pushing me aside and letting herself in. “And if you can get me a Diet Coke I would appreciate it.”

“
Did I miss something, or am I suddenly on your payroll?” I asked angrily. She would have never dared speak to me in that way if John were around. Typically she just ignored me.

“
Listen, faggot!” Zinnia spat with venom, turning around whipping off her sunglasses and shooting me an enraged look. “John and I have known each other a long time and we got a little deal going. So I’m not going anywhere. Now I know he’s ramming you, but I don’t really give a fuck. You see, he knows I can smash his career to smithereens, and honey, he won’t be able to pull an Ellen DeGeneres and survive it. So I suggest you get your fudgepacker ass to the bar and pour me a Diet Coke.”

She pointed to the bar in satisfaction.

“
And throw in three cubes of ice, you fucking fairy!” she added for further humiliation.

I was seething. I could feel my face getting hotter and hotter. Boiling blood was crawling up the back of my neck like a bubbling brew.

The wench had pushed me to the brink. And I let it rip. Getting up in her face and baring my lower teeth I seethed, “Listen you miserable, used-up, has-been cunt. I know all about your little games—you pile of shit. Bribery, payoffs, scams, the whole the fucking deal. But I’ll tell you one thing that looks worse in the press than a closet-case actor. And that’s a has-been starlet that has turned to bribery and dealing drugs to maintain her Hollywood lifestyle, you pathetic excuse for a human being. So now I’m going to make a suggestion. And that is you never show your botched-up, plastic surgery–ridden, yellow-green face in this house ever again. You got that?”

I pointed at the door just as she had pointed me to the bar. The stumpy little bitch looked at me with wide-eyed horror. Evidently she wasn’t used to people lowering themselves to her playing field where they could get that dirty. But she hadn’t known what Candy and I were capable of, especially when we put our heads together. She would rue the day she messed with us.

“
Who do you think you are, you pretty-boy faggot? You have no fucking idea who you are messing with!”

“
Oh I think I have a better idea than you know, bitch!” and with that I marched over to the coffee table where my briefcase bag was, newly bought at Prada care of John’s generous Christmas gift.

“
You see, I’ve been on to you for a long time,” I said, and with that pulled out a laser copy photo of the wench passing her narcotics outside the gym. I practically slapped her across the head with it.

Zinnia’s face turned from yellow-green to blazing red.

“
Is that what you do on the clock?” she seethed. “Spy on people?”

“
I didn’t have to,” I said in satisfaction. “There are other people you’ve screwed over who will do the work for me. Now, I don’t know what you’re lording over John. He didn’t even want to talk about you. But it’s over. I want you to get the fuck out of here and never come back, you understand me? Because if so I’ll make sure your picture is pasted over every front page in the country as a washed-out coke whore, and I’m sure the police department would just have a field day tormenting your spoiled ass. So let’s call things even, okay? You get lost and we’ll forget this little episode ever happened.”

Zinnia stood there enraged, tears of anger in her eyes. It was actually more disturbing than enjoyable to witness her reaction. The bitch obviously had some deep pathological disorders. It was a frightening reflection to think that that there were people like her in society. I swear if she had a knife in hand she would have stabbed me right then and there.

Thankfully, she grabbed her bag from where she had flung it on the couch and made her way to the door instead.

“
You better watch yourself, you fucking queer,” she turned around and snarled before leaving. “You see, this little exchange here, this was nothing,” she twirled a long red lacquered nail in the air to illustrate her point. “I’ve been playing at this kind of game for a long time. You have no idea who you just messed with.”

With that she slammed the door, her heels clicking loudly down the front walk. I went to the front window, watching her climb into the driver’s seat of her black Porsche, practically squeezing out of her tight low-slung jeans, rhinestone appliqué crop top sparkling in the late afternoon sun.

I tried not to reflect as much on her ominous threat and instead enjoyed the battle I had just won.

For the next week I worked as usual, enjoying life. John was in good spirits, having just signed on for the lead in a major studio film that was to shoot in the summer, while
Life’s Lessons
was on hiatus.