Authors: Shirley Maclaine
Relatively little has been said about the vital and
positive role of sex in ongoing human relationships, both physical and spiritual. We know that it is so vital because it is the fundamental force that ensures human survival. We know it should be positive precisely because it is so fundamental and because what we feel for another human being in this context can be the most powerful catalyst for pursuing the negotiation of joyful intimacy.
What I haven’t read about is the
intuitive
force we feel when we find ourselves attracted to another human being. I would like to address myself to that. I feel we are not only attracted to a body and a face; I feel we are also attracted to the soul essence of the individual. We may even be remembering that persona from another time, another place. When two souls meet and interact, sex becomes the dialogue of the physical being so that the soul recognition each may have for the other can be further explored and resolved.
I believe we have all had the experience of being both male and female. Each sex carries with it a different combination of energy patterns, the male being more assertive, manifesting, and intellect oriented; the female being more receptive, intuitively creative, and emotion oriented.
In the Indian, Middle Eastern, and Oriental cultures the female represents the yin energy, the male the yang energy. These two energies are basically complementary, the two energies operating in the universe that make a whole, the yang being external and manifesting and the yin internal and creative.
Looking at the sexual drive from this perspective—i.e., the need to complement or unite yin and yang—it was interesting for me to investigate the emotional issues surrounding sexual needs relating to the human chakra system.
I learned that in the aforementioned cultures the three lower chakras, in men
and women
, operate basically with yang energy, the energy of those issues that relate predominantly to the physical, earth plane of existence. The three higher chakras, in women
and men
, operate basically with yin energy, which relates predominantly to issues of the spirit.
The heart chakra, which is located in the center, is androgynous. It is the seat and home of the soul, or Higher Self, and it is perfectly balanced in its yin and yang expressions. The Higher Self is connected and interfaced with God energy, which also is perfect in its balance oí creating and manifesting, the yin and the yang.
Therefore, the more we each resonate to the perfection of the Higher Self, the more we are reflecting perfect balance in ourselves, the more androgynous we are. This does not mean bisexual. It simply means perfectly balanced recognition of the feminine and masculine aspects in each of us.
When we carefully examine our problems and conflicts relating to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, it becomes quite clear that many revolve around our perceptions of masculine and feminine issues, relating not only to sex but also to how we
express ourselves vis-à-vis creativity and manifestation. Do we need to be assertive because we fear annihilation from passivity and gentleness? Do we need to control for fear of being controlled? Do we dare listen to the whispers of intuition rather than the loud demands of the intellect?
Because we are imperfect creatures, working out as best we can the lacks, the unfulfilled needs, and the angers in our psyches, we use sexual attraction to choose people with whom we can resolve these issues. We can be sexually attracted to someone because we sense in the person a problem that is a reflection of our own trouble, and sex becomes the excuse and the bridge to intimacy. What we dimly sense in ourselves we can recognize, sometimes with all too blinding clarity, in another. Intimacy gives us the opportunity to work it out. A relationship becomes increasingly positive when we realize that it is ourselves we see in our partner—good and bad. So, going within to find out why we love one person rather than another can be very enlightening and extremely important in discovering who we really are and who it is we really love or don’t love (ourselves!).
The problems of expression and personal intimacy for us really revolve around the task of balancing the masculine and the feminine in ourselves.
So, to be metaphysical for a moment, step one is for each partner to recognize the validity of both masculine and feminine in himself or herself. This is not easy. A lot of men feel threatened by the yin
energy within themselves. Perhaps if they could recognize the yang components in their female partners it would help them accept their own sensitivity and capability for intuition and gentleness. This applies also to homosexual relationships. In arguments and misunderstandings, a very useful exercise in negotiation is to do what actors often do: read the other person’s part. The minute you begin to play your opponent’s (or partner’s) role, you begin to achieve a better understanding of each other’s problems. Because, remember, your “opposite” number is reading
your
part. It is a very enlightening process, and it can help to reduce fear and anger, and so to understand the strengths of both yin and yang.
Cultures that have an understanding of the influence of the energy of the zodiac (each 2,100-year period) are aware that the energy of the zodiacal age just passing—the Piscean Age—was masculine, yang energy. It was the energy influence of assertiveness, manifestation of the rational intellect and the power of the will. The Western world has been a magnificent example of expressing yang energy. Indeed, most of the world has been yang oriented. Most of our world leaders have been men who have attempted to solve the problems of the planet from sources primarily of the intellect and will. We are now in the Aquarian Age, which is yin, feminine energy, which requires balancing the intellect and the willpower with sources of the intuitive and the spiritual.
The spiritual bereavement in the world, then, is in
many ways a feminine bereavement, a lack of feminine spirituality in both leadership and personal relationships. When the creative, spiritual, feminine, yin energy is not respected, utilized, honored, and included in solving human problems, there can be dire consequences that are all too obvious. Hostility, fear, conflict, anger, and lack of understanding result. The spiritual masters suggest that the way to deal with your “enemy” is first to attempt to understand him; second, to realize that there is a common ground between the two opposing forces or there would be no conflict. Two opposing points of view exist in relation to the same subject, therefore common ground exists. In understanding more of the common ground there is obviously more chance for resolution.
Therefore the focus is shifted from differences to likenesses. The sting goes out of the polarity and what was originally a confrontation of opposites can become a marriage of worthy opponents where common likenesses are recognized. Third, a real level of spiritual evolvement can be reached when opposing forces realize that the
differences
served as catalysts for deeper understanding and even love. The loving unity of opposites, you might say; each reflecting the unresolved problems of the opposition. Your enemy then has become a best friend.
This perception is a more advanced understanding, in my view, and basically begins with an investigative look at oneself: “What is it I am afraid of? My enemy reflects that answer.”
This then becomes a spiritual issue, because we are learning from our “enemy.” Our enemy becomes our teacher. The need for domination of others then shifts to the need for inner understanding and dominion over self. This is the principle of martial arts (t’ai chi, aikido, et cetera), which is well known to be the most advanced solution to conflict. We in the West are beginning to realize that the resolution of conflict in the world begins with the transformation of self at home.
That requires a balance of the masculine and feminine approach to understanding not only who we are but who we can become. It means we can no longer afford to ignore the feminine principle of spirituality in our basic nature. I for one would like us to be more aware of the heritage of our soul energy, which is equal recognition of masculine and feminine, conducting ourselves more in accordance with the inspirations of the heart than we have in the past. The heart—feelings, emotions—is the seat of Divine consciousness, not the intellect of the mind.
Esoteric and mystical literature teaches that aeons ago, during the Lemurian and early Atlantean time periods, human beings had reached an exquisite level of spirituality. We were expressing through bodies and minds that perfectly reflected the balance of yin and yang in the soul. The seduction of technology diverted attention from the spiritual and as a result those magnificent societies ended.
We are facing the possibility of the same occurrence
now. Technology in the modern world is causing a crisis in spirituality. Whether or not one believes in the existence of Atlantis and Lemuria is really irrelevant. What is important is that the achievements of a society be judged by how spiritually advanced its members have become.
The spiritual level of a single individual is demonstrated by his capacity to live in the physical plane in harmony with his fellow men. The spiritual level of a society is demonstrated by that society’s capacity to live in harmony with all other societies. Only then can man and society live in ways that express the God force. The concept of
separation
from God then doesn’t exist. We are all one. Creative physicality and love become possible on any level imaginable.
Once man’s primary motivation is to express “as God,” the levels of such expression become more and more refined. To spiritualize the physical plane until we have become more God-like, more capable of individual and universal empathy and love, would then be the motivation and purpose for life itself.
What does all this have to do with sex and the chakras? We are in a situation today where sexually transmitted diseases are creating a crisis potentially as severe as war. These diseases are being transmitted as fast as we can get them under control. It is as though nature itself is pleading with us to go within ourselves to find our balanced yin/yang identity before it is too late, to become consummated in our own person instead of continually visiting on some
one else the responsibility for who we are. It is as though we each operate with a vague sense of frustration and loss, a lack of wholeness. That vague sense of loss and the equally vague and perpetual need to fulfill that loss in the person of another human being only builds one frustration upon another. I feel that if we go within to take command of the balance within
ourselves
, a more genuine fulfillment will follow.
That means working with our chakras. Working with an understanding of the chakras can help to mold and build the nature of a good sexual relationship because it focuses on the spiritual centers within. In ancient days Tantric techniques and exercises were devised to raise sexual consciousness of male and female so they could interrelate, both separately and as one.
The way this was done was to lovingly meditate on and appreciate those seven seats of consciousness within the desired partner. A couple would sit opposite each other, tuning in to the color, the vibrational frequency, the emotional issues, and the God energy within each other’s chakra system until the exercise became an erotic and sensual focus. Soon the blood flows of both individuals were erotically activated.
Tantric sex then became the spiritual recognition of the energy centers of loving partners. Soon each individual recognized himself or herself in the other.
Erotic sensuality was spiritually focused and realized so that when the Kundalini (life force) was
raised from the base chakra to the crown chakra, orgasm was achieved and a gateway to God and higher spiritual recognition became possible.
The act of procreation became an act of integrated spirituality on a soul-force level, enabling conception to occur at a heightened vibrational frequency so that a new soul could have an exquisitely orchestrated combination of egg and sperm to develop as a vehicle for entrance into the physical plane.
Individual forms of eroticism, attraction and counterattraction, were developed according to the predominant chakra issues a person was working with. When one partner was sensually sensitive to another, it was a question of being tuned in to the emotional centers that the chakra wheels best represented. Thus, the zones of sensuality developed according to the emotional needs that the seven chakras controlled, and a partner who was sensitive to those physical locations became a sensually sophisticated lover.
In the act of orgasm, the reversal of masculine and feminine polarities is the result. The masculine becomes more passive and the feminine more assertive. Therefore, in successfully sensitive sex an androgynous unit is accomplished.
Sex then becomes an expression of the androgyny of the soul, which is to say, perfectly balanced yin and yang. It is a spiritual endeavor void of the issues of power, sadomasochism, humiliation, or possessiveness. When sex is free of all these limitations it becomes a spiritual act, pure emotion, and hence
induces the feeling that the partners are touching God.
The sexual adventure of the dialogue of bodies to reach a union of yin and yang creates an experience that can hold us together with someone for years because it is reminiscent of the balance of aeons ago. We feel one; we feel integrated; we feel whole.
Many people, in their rapidly blossoming spiritual awakening, are beginning to relate differently to sex than they used to. They describe sexual tension as dissipating because they are becoming more balanced within themselves. They feel as though sex is giving
them
up—not the other way around. No longer is it so direly necessary to seek and find a partner to fulfill one’s physical needs. Self is becoming fulfilled and more clarified within. People are feeling more consummated in themselves; therefore, when they find themselves attracted to another, the relationship becomes a bonding out of equal recognition rather than a bonding through fear and a sense of need and loneliness.