Authors: David Mamet
C:
And I'll tell you what
else:
I think
someday someone's
going to find how to
cure
schizophrenia with a . . . say, with a simple
touch . . .
with . . . (
Pause
.) with . . . a small change in
diet . . .
(
Pause
.) With . . .
D:
Mm hmm . . .
C:
. . . with a
pressure
point . . . with . . .
D:
. . . with a simple
touch.
(
Pause.
)
C:
Yes. (
Pause
.) Absolutely. (
Pause
.)
A:
Will he be in there long?
C:
I don't know.
A:
Will you take him back when he comes out?
C:
Certainly.
D:
Absolutely.
C:
Absolutely. (
Pause.
)
Two
After dinner conversation.
A
and
B,
two men.
A:
. . . the way
I
understand it . . . the way
I
understand it . . .
I'll
tell you what the
Antichrist
is
. . .
B:
What?
A:
I'll tell you, and I believe it will come. Although I
don't
believe we've seen it yet. When we'll
see it,
when we'll
see
it is in the
hard
. . . in the
true
. . . eh? In the
true, true
hard times. And what I think the
Antichrist
is is, the way that we can understand it's if we say “The False Girlfriend.” (
Pause
.) Mm. When one is ready to be
married.
Then you say that
this
one has something
unique
which until now you
longed
for but . . .
B:
. . . yes . . .
A:
But you couldn't
find.
So now you've
found
it, now you can . . .
B:
Um hmm . . .
A:
Get
married
. (
Pause
.)
B:
So now you can get married.
A:
But it's just the
time
is right. That's all. The time is right; and
when
it is you
see
someone and say, “She is the One.” Now: Full of our old habits, the person that we see
first—
like a
policeman.
He sees the streets differently from a
cab
driver . . . they both see different things—so when we're
ready . . .
B:
Mm . . .
A:
To
wed
—it could be our old
habits
cause our
sight
to fasten on . . .
B:
Uh huh . . .
A:
A . . .
B:
. . . the false . . .
A:
No. Not necessarily
false. Yes.
False. In a way. In that all that's
wrong,
finally, is that she . . . she's not the right—put in her place as, simply, as a “woman,"
fine.
But as the girl for
you,
no. No. To
marry?
No. Because you're caught in your “pre-courtship . . . ” No. “Pre-marriage courtship context.” Your
sight . . .
(
Pause.
) Your body says “wed.” But your soul, your, no, your
habits
still in that outmoded mode of
thinking.
So she's wrong. She's the wrong one. Although
the
time
is right. You break up with this person. You find someone
new.
You
marry
and you say “Now how
extraordinary
that I found
two
such . . . ”
B:
. . . yes . . .
A:
. . . and, if you
think,
you reason back and you see that it was only the
time
was right. Just like a
flower.
(
Pause
.) That's all. So, with the
Antichrist . . .
it's just an . . . here's where I think the new test . . . it's . . .
B:
. . . the New Testament . . .
A:
. . . it's
brilliant.
What it
is
is, finally, I think, I could be wrong, perhaps not in
entirety,
but perhaps
so,
I don't know. What it is is allegory for
marriage.
(
Pause
.) The
Christ,
the
Antichrist . . . reunion . . .
B:
You're saying it's pri . . .
A:
What?
B:
It's primarily a ho . . .
A:
A what?
B:
A homosexual relationship.
A:
What is?
B:
I don't mean a ho . . . I mean a homosexual
romance . . .
A:
No. (
Pause.
)
Perhaps
it is. (
Pause
.) No. Because we're . . . Ah. Because we're waiting for that
man . . .
B:
For that one man . . .
A:
No. Perhaps so, Huh. (
Pause.
) Huh. (
Pause
.) What are you saying? (
Pause
.)
B:
That it's a homosexual romance.
A:
Huh. (
Pause
.)
B:
No. I'm not saying that. I'm asking if . . .
A:
If
I
implied that.
B:
Yes.
A:
If the New Testament . . . (
Pause
.) No. I don't think so. (
Pause.
) You're . . . wait a second. I said it's an . . .
B:
. . . it's an allegory . . .
A:
. . . it's an allegory for . . .
B:
. . . mmm hmm . . .
A:
But what
you're
saying
B:
Yes. For marriage. But it's not a reconciliation with the . . .
A:
With the
Earth . . .
B:
Yes.
A:
With the, um, um, with the
mother
figure . . . no.
B:
But . . .
A:
Yes. Mmm. With the . . . yes . . .
B:
Yes. With the . . .
A:
But with the
father
. (
Pause
.)
B:
It's not a hetero . . .
A:
No . . .
B:
If we . . .
A:
Yes. Taken as a romance. No. (
Pause
.) Mm. Striving for
. . .
(
Pause
.) No. (
Pause
.)
Wait a second. (
Pause
.) Now; what are we: what are we . . . what are we
saying
here: Let's step back . . . (
Pause.
) That Christianity is..
.
(
Pause.
) I started off, I said that the
Antichrist
is The False Girlfriend . . .
B:
Is
like
the false . . .
A:
But it would be the false
Boyfriend
is what you're saying. (
Pause.
) You're saying that the whole religion's basically an apology for homosexuality
B:
I don't think that I'm saying that.
A:
Well. It's the logical extension of your . . . A reunion with the
Father.
A refusal to accept the . . . um . . . the weight of . . . hetero . . .
essentially . . .
wait . . . wait a second:
mate,
have
children, bequeath . . .
the seed bank . . . pass on your, um, and
die.
Essentially the hetero . . . and what
you're
saying . . . well. Well, yes. Um. And living
forever.
(
Pause.
) That You will live forever. It's a, yes, it's basically a refusal to
change. Continence . . .
um, we are assured that if we plight
our troth to the
father
figure we will not d . . . which is, um, to say we will not grow
up.
We will not grow
old.
Ha. So we have discovered the . . . wait, we have discovered the Perfect Man. We fall in love with him, and we will not grow old. Yes. It's a homosexual romance. Yes. If we, what? If we
sufficiently,
if we love him with all our
hearts
(
Pause.
) Um. (
Pause
.) It really has nothing to do with
women, does
it? (
Pause.
) No. (
Pause.
) Mmm. (
Pause.
) And his attachment to his
mother
! Well, no not
his,
but
ours..
.um . . . we can't . . . we can't
divorce
ourselves from . . . Oh! Oh! Oh! and the Weak, Absent
Father
! Hm! The Father Cuckolded! The impotent . . . the failure of the marriage . . . Ha! Ha! (
Pause.
) Ha! (
Pause.
) Ha! Oh! Oh! I've got to . . . (
Gets up.
) excuse me . . .
B:
Will I see you . . . ?
A:
Yes. I'll call you tonight.
Two Scenes
One
A:
Give me one.
B:
Here is a one.
A:
Give me a two.
B:
Here is two.
A:
Give me three.
B:
I don't have three.
A:
Give me a two.
B:
Here is two.
A:
Give me a one.
B:
Here is one.
A:
Give me a four.
B:
I have four.
A:
Give me a five.
B:
Here is a five.
A:
Give me a six.
B:
Six.
A:
Give me seven.
B:
Yes.
A:
Eight.
B:
Yes.
A:
Give me nine.
B:
I don't have nine.
A:
Give me eight.
B:
Yes.
A:
Give me another eight.
B:
Eight.
A:
Give me ten.
B:
Here is ten.
A:
Let me have ten again.
B:
Ten.
A:
Give me twelve.
B:
Here is twelve.
A:
Nine through twelve.
B:
Yes.
A:
Eight.
B:
Yes.
A:
. . . that was eight through twelve?
B:
It was. We don't have nine. I mean “ten through twelve.”
A:
Yes.
B:
. . . or “nine through twelve,” but we don't have nine.
A:
Yes. Give me eight.
B:
Eight again?
A:
Yes.
B:
Here is eight.
A:
And give me five.
B:
Five.
A:
One through three.
B:
Yes.
A:
No.
Three.
Is that right?
B:
That is right.
A:
Two alone.
B:
Two.
A:
Five.
B:
Five.
A:
Fifteen.
B:
Yes.
A:
Eleven.
B:
Yes.
A:
Eleven and five.
B:
Yes.
A:
Two
eleven and five.
B:
Yes.
A:
Three
eleven and five. Make that four . . . scrub that. For-get that. Give me six.
B:
Six.
A:
Six and five.
B:
Go.
A:
Six two five and five.
B:
Yes.
A:
One.
B:
Yes.
A:
Good. That's alright.
B:
Are you done?
A:
I think so. Yes. Thank you.
Um, um, um. No. I think that's it. I'm done. Thank you. I'm finished. Fine. That's fine. That's very good; in fact, I'm happy with it. (
Pause.
) That's very good.
Two
Speaker:
Up. Everyone up.
Up . . .
That's
right.
Down slowly.
Down.
Now left. Left. Left.
And left.
Now right.
Hold . . .
hold it . . . up . . . now center . . . left. Left left.
Now down. Now left again and hold.
Return.
Now down.
Now up again. Now hold.
And right right right.
Now down and
hold.
Now cross.
And back again.
Now
cross . . .
Now
center . . . out
. . . and
hold it . . .
out again . . . wait for it . . . out . . . and
Good
!
(Pause.)
In.
Now hold. And
left.
Now hold. And
in
now hold. And
right
now hold.
And
in
now hold. And
left
now hold . . . and
in
now hold and
yes
and
out
and
left
now hold and
down.
(
Pause
.)
Good.
(
Pause
.)
Good.
(
Pause
.)
Very Good.
(
Pause
.)
Wait
. (
Pause
.)
Wait
. (
Pause
.)
Down
. . . (
Pause
.)
Down . . . (
Pause
.)
Good
! (
Pause
.) Good. (
Pause
.)
Good
.