Gone Too Far (12 page)

“We were talking,” she protested, although she didn't figure it was very convincing. The pain in her wrist made her not give too much of a damn. “Do you have any proof anything else happened?”

“You and Carter don't talk,” he said. “You either fuck or you fight.”

“Things are different,” Avery said. “Evan's condition has softened him, and he's being more reasonable.”

“It stops now, Avery!”

Avery watched as his hands gripped the edges of his wheelchair. She thought for a second he was going to stand up from the way he was holding on, and when she looked into his eyes, something was there that made her believe that was exactly what he was about to do.

Then he blinked and lowered his head. He looked down at his hands as they loosened their grip. He placed them weakly on his lap, never looking up again as he said, “You can't leave me.”

Avery wanted to reach out to him, but she didn't. She had been so sure that he was going to stand up but now realized that he wasn't. He had only forgotten that he couldn't, and it was her fault. He was pitiful and he knew it, which was why he wouldn't look at her. Avery felt awful.

“I'm not going to leave you,” she said, because it was all she could say. It was all she could promise.

 

“Doctor, please follow me.”

Leigh was barely paying attention to Ellen Ogwayo, the diminutive but energetic woman who was giving her a tour of the makeshift refugee camp's hospital two hours outside of Nairobi. It was the first stop on the senator's tour, but Leigh, with bodyguard in tow, stepped away from the scene when she noticed how much press was present. She didn't want to be a part of that.

She had barely gotten an hour of sleep last night after talking to Evan's doctor. Dr. Kent tried to quell Leigh's concerns, but after talking to Michael, Leigh had gotten even more upset—not as a doctor, but as a sister. She changed her mind several times about whether or not to go home, but before she knew it, the morning had come and the bus carrying the senator's entourage showed up.

“As you'll notice,” Ellen continued, “we're much farther from the border than our original refugee camps are. Those camps are completely overstuffed, and we're getting there as well. Our camp is a UN camp, but we can't monitor all the camps, and there are complaints of mistreatment at some of them.”

Leigh looked down at her cell phone. She still wasn't getting any signal, and it was starting to frustrate her.

“We're trying to keep this section for the women and girls,” Ellen said. “There are…more sensitive issues they need help with, which is why I asked to take you aside.”

“Are you going to do this every time?”

Leigh and Ellen turned around to see Max giving Bem the evil eye as Bem held a hand up to keep him from Leigh.

“Bem, please,” Leigh said. “We've discussed this.”

Reluctantly, Bem stepped aside and Max approached Leigh with a concerned look on his face.

“It's very nice to meet you, Senator!” Ellen almost giggled the words as she held out her hand.

It took Leigh a second to catch on, but she realized that Max was waiting for her to introduce the two of them. After she did, she ignored their small talk and tried to turn her cell phone off and then on again to see if it would work.

“You might be looking for this,” Max said as he held out a small cell phone.

Leigh looked at the phone, confused. “Another phone? None of the cell phones are working. I've tried Bem's and—”

“This one will,” Max said. “It's mine.”

“I can't take your phone, Senator. You need that.”

“You need it more.” He gestured for her to take it. “Besides, I'll get to use it as an excuse to stay near you—that is, if Bem doesn't shoot me.”

Leigh smiled as she took the phone. Looking at it, she could see it was working. “Thank you. I'm dying to hear from my family.”

“I understand,” Max said. “And I'm happy you've chosen to stay.”

Leigh flipped the phone open. “I should really go call my—”

“Must you do this now?” Ellen asked.

Leigh was sure that Ellen had no idea who she really was or what was going on with her family. The woman was busy trying to help desperately lost people, and Leigh doubted she would understand.

“I will only be a few minutes,” she said.

“We have only a few minutes with Katna,” Ellen said. She looked nervously at the senator before stepping closer to Leigh. She lowered her voice to almost a whisper. “Katna is a sixteen-year-old refugee who was abused in the Sudan and…she has now contracted HIV. She is very reluctant to talk, and I was hoping you could try before she goes back to her family in the camp.”

Leigh felt her heart sink into her stomach as she thought of the young girl.

“Leigh?” Max asked, seeming to notice her change in demeanor. “Are you okay? Do you think you can handle this?”

After taking a deep breath, Leigh looked at him. “I'm a doctor. Of course I can handle it. I'll talk to her now.”

“D
o you want to talk to Leigh?” Carter asked Michael. “It's not easy to get through to Kenya.”

Michael shook his head. “I just talked to her this morning. Nothing has changed.”

Sitting in a lounge chair out on the balcony of Carter's condo, Michael stared out at an unusually clear L.A. skyline. He couldn't really take any more questions from his sister, although he blamed himself for not letting Kimberly talk to her about Evan before she left for Africa. He blamed himself for everything.

Carter said good-bye to his sister and hung up. Placing the phone on the table near the balcony doors, he stepped outside. “You should at least eat something. I had a bunch of food brought over from—”

“I'm not hungry,” Michael said. “Besides, I have to go back to the hospital.”

Carter leaned against the brick wall, wishing there was more he could do. He'd seen Michael take a hit of scotch, but he hadn't seen him eat. “You sure you can drive?”

“I have a driver.”

“Well, when you come back, I'll make sure Julia has—”

“I'm not coming back,” Michael said. “I appreciate that you're letting me stay here, because its closer to the hospital than my hotel, but I'm going to go back there tonight.”

“You shouldn't be alone,” Carter said.

“Do you love her yet?” Michael asked, finally looking up at his brother, his best friend.

Carter was caught off guard by the question. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“I got enough problems,” Michael answered. “I don't need to have to wade through the thick air in this place. I can feel it and it makes me uncomfortable.”

“Since when did you give a damn?” Carter asked. “Nothing makes you uncomfortable.”

“Right now,” Michael said, “everything does.”

For several reasons, Carter knew better than to let Michael know that he was sleeping with Avery again. It was Michael who exposed their affair to the family and to Anthony last year. Michael didn't approve of Carter's continued pursuit of Avery, and Carter wasn't interested in the lecture. Most importantly, Michael didn't need to be bothered with anything right now.

He probably shouldn't have even told Michael in the first place he didn't love Julia but old habits are hard to break. Growing up on the East Coast at exclusive prep schools while their family was in L.A., the boys were the only family each other had most of their lives. They had formed a bond beyond mere brotherhood. There was nothing they wouldn't do for each other. They helped each other out when one was in trouble, and they kept each other's secrets. But lately that had changed. When Michael's marriage to Kimberly was disintegrating, Carter knew that Michael was being extremely cruel to Kimberly, but he didn't know to what extent. Michael was in his own hell, and while Carter, after Avery left him—again—was willing to spill the beans on his feelings for Julia, he was in no mood to be honest about how angry he was over Avery.

But right now, none of that mattered. Carter had never seen his brother, who had a fire inside of him that could be seen miles away, look vulnerable. Carter hated going to the hospital and seeing his nephew, looking so small and helpless. It made him feel powerless, and his grief only made him think of the limits to which he could protect his own daughter.

“I'm sorry,” Carter said. “Things are a little tense with the wedding planning and…I can talk to her.”

“No,” Michael said. “I don't want to be pulled into your drama anymore. I'm going back to the hotel.”

“What do you want me to do?” Carter asked. “I'm trying to help you, but I can't do anything if you don't talk to me.”

“Don't you get it?” Michael stood up, feeling a little light-headed. “There is nothing you can do. There is nothing anyone can do. Not even King Chase. After all his promises, all that is left is more promises.”

“You know Dad would do anything for Evan,” Carter said. Carter had noticed that his dad reacted more emotionally to Evan's condition than he had ever seen him in his life. It was weird yet comforting to see this seemingly impenetrable man so openly penetrated. “So would I.”

“Dad can pray for Evan,” Michael said as the cell phone in his jeans pocket vibrated, “but you can't. All I need is for everyone to pray for him, but you can't pray for my son, can you?”

Carter's atheism was an issue that put him at odds with everyone in his family, especially his mother. When they got engaged, Avery had told him it was the one thing she wanted from him, to give God a chance, and he'd promised her he would be open. Avery seemed convinced that she would bring him around, and he had agreed to let Connor be baptized to make Avery happy.

But he wasn't convinced himself. He didn't believe in much that didn't make sense and couldn't be proven, and he had to admit that the sickness of such an innocent boy made him more inclined not to believe in a God, because why would he let that happen?

While Michael had teased Carter about his beliefs, it had never been a sore spot between them.

“Michael, I—”

“That's my driver calling.” Michael turned and walked into the living room. “I have to go to the hospital.”

As he watched his brother leave, Carter searched desperately for something he could say or do, but he knew there wasn't anything. It was a fundamental difference that separated him from all those he loved, but this was the first time he really saw it was hurting them, and he felt guilty.

Carter walked into the kitchen with the intent of getting something to eat quickly before he went back to the office, but reaching the refrigerator, he realized that he wasn't hungry. Not for food at least. He wanted…

“Carter?”

Carter thought for a second that he was hallucinating when he saw Avery standing in the doorway to his kitchen, but as she walked toward him, he knew he wasn't.

“How did you get in here?” It wasn't what he meant to ask, but it was what came out.

“Michael left the door open.”

Avery was so happy to see him again that she couldn't stand it. She knew she was risking a lot by coming here. She had no idea where Julia might be, but she didn't care. Even if all she could do was talk to Carter, it would be enough, but what she wanted was to make love to him, to feel him inside of her.

“I was standing in the hallway,” she said. “He walked by without even looking at me. Is Julia here?”

“No.” Carter leaned against the refrigerator as Avery walked toward him.

She looked good enough to eat, in a multicolored boatneck dress that loosely hung at her curves and stopped a few inches above her knees. The way she swayed over to him, the dress moving against her skin, made him hungry for her. Tasting her again and again was still not enough. There was a part of him that wished he could get his fill and get her out of his life, but that wasn't happening anytime soon.

“What do you want?” he asked. “I have to go back to work.”

“You know what I want.” She leaned against him and began unbuttoning his shirt. “You're the one who called me this morning, asking when you could see me again.”

“Yes, I remember.” Carter slipped away from her and walked to the large kitchen island, where he grabbed a banana from the fruit basket. “Then you told me you couldn't talk, because your husband was rolling into the kitchen.”

Avery rolled her eyes. “Is that necessary?”

Carter laughed. “I'm the bad guy? You're cheating on him. I think making fun of his…incapacity rates a little lower.”

Avery leaned back against the counter. “Well, you certainly have improved your mood-killing skills.”

“You're not my girlfriend, Avery.” Carter walked over to her, standing just a few inches from her. He loved to see that look in her large, beautiful eyes when he came this close. She gave herself away; she was very aroused. “Stop assuming you can come by when you want.”

“We've had this conversation before.” Avery leaned into him. She grabbed the banana and tossed it on the counter behind her. She reached up and slid her arms around him. “I know you've missed me and I've—”

“Stop.” He removed her hands even though he didn't want to. “I'm going through a lot right now. You're the last thing on my mind. And where is my daughter, by the way?”

“She's with your mother.” Avery pushed him back. “You agreed that Janet could take her to a photographer for pictures without telling me.”

“I guess I forgot to tell you,” Carter lied. “Mom needed to spend time with her. She's very upset over Evan.”

“Everyone is,” Avery said. She felt her excitement return as Carter came toward her again. She wanted him so bad, but her desire couldn't override her concern for him. There was something in his eyes beyond passion.

“What's wrong with you?” she asked.

Carter grabbed her at her hips and kissed her on the lips. “I'm feeling shitty. Make me feel better.”

Avery got goose bumps as his hands rubbed her hips and thighs, but she grabbed them, making him stop. “Carter, I'm serious. Is this about Evan?”

“I don't want to talk about Evan,” Carter said as he leaned down and kissed her soft, supple neck. His hands went to her breasts, touching them roughly. “I want to fuck.”

“Carter, I…” Avery could barely breathe now, but she tried to hold it together. “I just want to…”

“What?” Carter abruptly lifted up, separating from her. It wasn't easy; he was hard and felt like his body was a thousand degrees. “I don't want to talk to you about my nephew. You're here for sex, so let's have sex.”

Avery was confused. “You still want me to believe that this is just sex for you?”

“What?” Carter asked, almost laughing. “Do you think you're my…girlfriend? My lover? You're my piece on the side, Avery. Don't think this is anything more than an affair.”

“I told you that I love you,” Avery said despite the dagger of his words. “I know you don't love me back, but I am the mother of your child, so don't you ever call me your piece on the side again! I refuse to believe this is just about sex for you. I can feel you, Carter. I can feel what's inside of you. You hate me, but you love me too.”

Carter was fuming now. “How dare you tell me how I feel!”

“Fine,” she said. “Then I'll ask you how you feel. Do you love Julia?”

“Why does everyone keep asking me that?”

“Do you?” she demanded.

“No!” Carter yelled back. “All right? Are you happy? I don't love her. I don't love you. I don't love anybody!”

“That's my fault, I know.” Avery looked into his angry eyes. “Things are beyond our control. But even though they are, we can still have something.”

“We have this,” Carter said. “And this is all it's going to be. I'm not stupid enough to let you back into my heart.”

“Even though I'm stupid enough to let you back into mine?”

As she reached for him again, Carter knew he had no chance against this woman. He reached out and knocked everything off the island. He lifted Avery up and placed her on it. He grabbed her dress at her chest and ripped it open, exposing her breasts. He brought her to him and kissed her hard, wanting to hurt her with the pressure of his lips.

 

The less serious pediatric cases in the overcrowded Nairobi Hospital were tended to in the open-lobby area. That is where Leigh had been for the last four hours, trying to help an endless line of cuts and bruises, and no one was willing to tell her where they got them. She had heard reports of abuse by guards in the camps and fighting among the refugees uninterrupted by guards. She had heard that when refugees left the camps to venture into the streets, locals harassed them. With Max's help, Leigh had been able to have some of them transferred to one of the city's hospitals, hoping they would feel freer to talk.

Right now, Richard was the name of the little boy with cuts on his knees that she could readily believe were common injuries of eight-year-old boys, running and falling. He would smile, but he wouldn't talk to her. Leigh could only imagine how insecure he felt in this situation. What had he seen?

“Wanna see something?” Leigh asked.

Richard seemed somewhat curious but was reluctant to respond. He looked around as if he wasn't sure he was safe.

“It's okay,” she said. “I have a little present for you.”

He very slowly nodded, looking intently into her eyes. When she pulled the present out, his face lit up.

“Batman!”

Leigh feigned surprise as she unwrapped the small cartoon Band-Aid. “You speak English?”

The boy smiled but didn't nod. “Batman!”

“Everyone knows Batman.” Leigh applied the Band-Aid to the last cut on his knee. “You like?”

Just as he nodded, Leigh was distracted by a growing noise behind her. She turned around to see Max with his entourage and the press, and it upset her. Every time she wanted to think he was genuine, he did something like this. Looking at him now, basking in the attention as if it was a photo shoot, it seemed clear to her that this was a publicity stunt. While she had seen some of his staff sweating profusely as they volunteered around the camps and other hospitals, she hadn't seen him really working at all.

Leigh had had enough of this. If the senator wasn't going to bring the attention to the real issues, then she would have to make him. Bem didn't try to stop her as she rushed over to Max. She reached within ten feet of him when a member of his staff, a young white man in his twenties with red hair on his sun-reddened, freckled head and wearing a baby blue polo shirt and khaki shorts, jumped in between and held out his hand to stop her.

“The senator is in the middle of a presser right now,” he said. “Please wait until—”

“What is your name?” Leigh asked.