Gonzo (Rolling Thunder Motorcycle Club Book 7) (3 page)

C
onstance

I
didn’t know
what to think of Gonzo. I’d been prepared to go into the bar last night and watch him, and then leave without telling him… but I’d seen something when he’d rescued the drunk girls from obvious predators. I know it’s his job, but I saw a guardian under the rough biker exterior. A protector.

I wondered most of the night if I wasn’t romanticizing what I saw, and if it was possible I’d made a huge mistake by bringing this man into our lives. Watching him go to his knees to talk to the kids eased the fist around my heart, and then when I found out he’d brought food and toys, I wanted to hug him.

I’d wanted to hug him last night, too. This burly, gruff biker who cried when he was shown a picture of his children. I worried I’d broken something inside him last night, but he seemed better today.

My father was certain this was a mistake, and I could tell he’d decided he didn’t like Gonzo before he even met him, which meant the man never had a chance.

I looked at my father now. “Dad, why don’t you sit with Brain and Harmony while we watch the kids?”

“I don’t get to see them much,” he protested.

“Thirty minutes won’t kill you. We’ll be back soon.”

The twins took off ahead of us, one raced up a rope ladder while the other dashed up a small climbing wall, and they met in the fort at the top. Declan went across the monkey bars with his sister close behind, they dropped when they got to the end, and then raced back to do it again, though they went down the spiral the next time.

“They’re fast, and strong,” Gonzo commented.

“They’ll do that a dozen or so times and then they’ll be ready for us to do stuff with them. They need someone to lift them up to reach the little zipline, and there are a few other things made for the big kids that they can do, but need help because they’re short.”

“Most four year olds can’t do the monkey bars like that.”

“It’s been a problem at preschool a few times, when they can do more than other kids, and sometimes decide to play on equipment off limits for their grade. They’re both in gymnastics now, to try to teach them better how to use their bodies, and to get some of their never-ending energy out. My dad wants me to put them in martial arts but I’m not sure that’s the right course.”

“I know a responsible instructor who’ll teach it with an emphasis on self-discipline, if you want to try it out and see if he’s right for them.”

“What are your intentions?” Okay, so it came out of nowhere, but I needed to know.

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve raised them. I see them as my kids, now. I mean, it’s complicated. I’m not their biological mother, but I’ve acted as their mom for so long…” He’d glanced at me, but now his eyes were back on the kids — watching them like a seasoned pro. Was he already a father? “I guess I just want to know whether you want to visit every once in a while, or whether you’re looking for more.”

“They live with you, and right now your home is theirs. I’d love to take them home and be the family we should be, but that isn’t the right way to do this. You’re important to them but I want to become important, too. I don’t know how to answer you, but I can tell you as long as you and I work together to do what’s best for them, it’ll all work out.”

I’d assumed the big burly biker might be interested in being a dad occasionally, but it’d never crossed my mind he might want custody.

“Hey,” he said, looking at me a few seconds this time before looking back to the kids, “it’ll work out. You did the right thing by telling me I have kids. I know you’ll keep doing the right thing as we move forward, and I’ll do what’s best for my kids,
always
.”

“Do you have other kids?” This didn’t feel like someone who’s never had to deal with the responsibility of fatherhood before.

“Why do you ask?”

“Because if they have half-siblings, I’d think that’s important information.”

Chloe chose that moment to begin climbing higher than she was allowed to go, and I turned to tell her to come down.

“But it’s been forever since I’ve gone this high, and I’m a
big girl
now!”

My mouth dropped open as Gonzo scaled the side of the structure, went up over the roof of the fort, and stood on it beside my little Chloe as she went up the arched portion of the roof beside him. “You can’t be this high without holding someone’s hand,” he told her. “You and I just met, imagine how sad I’d be if you fell and got hurt.”

“You might fall, too.”

“I’ve had lots of practice at being surefooted. I’ll keep you safe today, but you have to promise not to go this high again without an adult here to hold your hand.”

She tried to whisper, but she’s really bad at it so I heard her tell him, “I’ve always wanted a daddy to hold my hand. My friends have daddies, and I’m sad when I see them hug.”

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t here before, Chloe, but I’ll hold your hand now.”

She gave him a fierce nod and he wrapped his arms around her. She curled her tiny arms around his neck, and I wanted to cry.

Yeah, I’d made the right decision.

Also, now I knew why the children appeared to be half-monkey sometimes. They got it from their dad.

Declan asked me to help him on the zip line, and I walked with him to the other side of the structure. It starts about ten feet up and ends at four feet up, and takes a while to get there. It’s quite tame but the kids love it. They need help because they can’t reach the handle from the little platform, plus, someone has to walk the handle back up the line.

I kept an eye on Chloe and Gonzo, and he held her hand as she went to the top, and then he brought her down. She rode his hip as he scaled the side once more, and then he brought her to us.

“Miss Chloe would like to do the zipline as well, it would seem.”

Gonzo and I worked as a team, and he walked the zipline back while I lifted the children, and then we swapped jobs for a bit. Finally, Chloe raced for the swings when she landed, Declan followed her, and Gonzo and I stood and talked as we watched them swing.

“Thank you.”

He said it quietly, and I could hear so much emotion in the two words it almost brought tears to my eyes.

“You’re welcome.”

“I’m usually an asshole to adults. I’ll try not to be with you, but if I am, feel free to tell me and I’ll try to do better.”

“I was worried you’d cuss in front of the children. Thank you for keeping your language clean around them, at least.”

“I brought fruit because I worried you might be one of those who doesn’t allow candy and I didn’t want to cause strife. There’s so much I need to learn about my own children.”

“We don’t keep candy in the house, but if we’re somewhere else and it’s available, it isn’t taboo. I allow them to eat however much they want the weekend after Halloween, so we can get it out of the house as quickly as possible. They’re always hyper, but candy makes them even more so.”

“I have access to grass fed beef. If you have room in your freezer I’d love to get you as much as you can store. Candy hypes me up, too, but a good steak calms the beast.”

“We don’t need anything from you.”

“I know, but let me do right by all of you.”

I didn’t want to tell him I’m rich. I drive a late model Volvo, so he had to know we weren’t hurting for money, and I’d told him my sister lived in an apartment in my basement. Still, he didn’t need to know how well off I am. Of course, he’d want to come to the house and then he’d have more of an idea. I sighed. “I have more money than I know what to do with and I love spending it on them. You’re a bouncer — we don’t need to take anything from you.”

I could almost feel tension coming off him and I stepped away, but he grabbed my arm again. I saw my father stand and I shook my head at him.

“You’re going to have to stop grabbing me, Gonzo. It worked okay last night, but you can’t do it every time I try to move away from you.”

He hadn’t grabbed hard enough to hurt me, but he relaxed his grip a little as he said, “I plan to buy a car tomorrow. I don’t know what kind, but I’ll do the research to make sure it’s safe. I have a bike because that’s what I want. I have a truck because it’s practical, but it isn’t suitable for driving young kids around. When I buy this car tomorrow, I’ll write a check for it — I won’t need to take out a loan. It probably won’t be a Volvo, but it’ll be safe and dependable. Bouncing is only one of the things I do for the MC. We own a bike repair shop, the bar, and a gun store. We also patrol our area of town to keep it safe. We get paid for the jobs we do, but we also get a quarterly bonus based on profits. I’m not hurting for cash, either.”

Finally, he let go of my arm. He hadn’t hurt me, and yet my heart felt as if it were trying to escape my chest.

I took a breath and said the only thing I could. “I apologize.”

“I’m sorry if I scared you. I’ll promise you right now that I’ll never physically hurt you, and I’ll do my best not to hurt your feelings. I know better than to promise I won’t do the latter, but I’ll try.”

I ran my hand down my arm where his hand had been. It felt as if he’d branded me with it, though that was ludicrous.

“You should know the kids can hear exceptionally well. I don’t understand it, but I’ve learned to be careful what I say if they’re in the vicinity, even if you think they’re out of range.”

He watched them swing a few times as a smile lit his face, and then he looked back to me, his expression solemn. “I don’t need a DNA test to know they’re mine, but if you need the proof I won’t mind submitting a sample for a test.”

I shook my head, “No. They have your eyes, and Declan is growing into your build. If that isn’t enough, you erased my final doubt when you asked about them being able to see in the dark.”

“What hours do you work? What hours are they in school?”

“My hours are kind of flexible. I have to be there from about ten to four, but I can patch the other two hours onto the beginning or end in whatever manner I wish. Their preschool is from nine to three, and their daycare picks them up from school for an extra charge. I usually drop them off at school at ten till nine, and then I pick them up from daycare around five forty.”

“I’d like to bring dinner Tuesday night so you don’t have to cook. If I’m being too forward inviting myself, perhaps I can meet you at a restaurant and pay for dinner?”

“Let’s see how the rest of today goes before we make plans, okay?”

He nodded, but I could once again see the emotion in his eyes. These were
his
kids, and he’d become quite possessive of them already. My being able to say when he could see them was going to rankle, and he and I were going to have to come to terms about that up front or there’d be problems. It was nice for him to think it would all work out as long as we’re thinking of the kids, but not terribly practical.

I was their legal guardian and it was my call, but I felt I needed to explain my reasoning. “I’m not going to keep you from them, I just need to see how they are afterwards and make sure they’re handling everything okay emotionally. I love that you want to see them and want to be part of their lives, I just have to make sure we don’t screw this up. Okay?”

He nodded and looked back to the twins, who were laughing and giggling as they went much higher than I like for them to, but I’d long ago learned they’re capable of much more than I’d prefer they do at this age. I don’t want to hold them back, but it would kill me if they got hurt. So far, they haven’t, but to be honest it’s a miracle. They’re both little daredevils.

Gonzo’s friend walked toward us and put his hand on Gonzo’s shoulder much as Duke had done last night. Gonzo exhaled and shook his head as he said, “Thanks, brother.”

“Anytime.”

“Brother?” I asked.

“We didn’t grow up brothers, but we are now,” Gonzo explained to me before turning to the kids and asking, “Who’s hungry?”

Chloe came sailing out of her swing, and Gonzo caught her and ran with her. Declan slowed a little before jumping out, and Brain and I followed as Declan ran to catch up with his sister and father.

Father
. The twins have a father who wants to be part of their life. After being the only person they have in their little lives, would I have told him if I thought there was a chance he’d take my kids away from me? Yeah, I would’ve because it had been the right thing to do, but I’d have consulted an attorney first, so I knew my options, and so I could make sure all the paperwork naming me as guardian was in order.

Oh hell, I
know
it’s in order. Getting them into the right elementary school was turning into a huge undertaking, but I’d already had to submit papers to have them considered for admittance along with documentation showing I was their parent or legal guardian, and it’d all been accepted without anyone batting an eye. We’d had our first interview already, and as far as I knew they were still being considered. It’d been hell getting them into this preschool, but it’s a feeder school for the elementary school I want them in, so I was hoping they’d make the cut.

I’d brought enough food for six adults and the two kids because I didn’t know how many people Gonzo would bring. My dad helped me pull the food out, and then he handed out plates and silverware to everyone while I put serving spoons in the mashed potatoes, baked beans, and slaw. I handed everyone a napkin as I told them to dig in, adding, “And I brought baby wipes, because it’s impossible to eat fried chicken without getting your hands all gross.”

“Real plates on a picnic,” said Brain. “I thought my mom was the only one who did that.”

“I
detest
paper plates,” I admitted as I spooned food out for the kids. I noted Gonzo watching me, and realized he was once again learning what his kids needed, seeing what I did to take care of them.

Chloe had sat down by my dad, so Declan was beside Gonzo and I was facing them, with Brain and Harmony to my left. I handed a few extra napkins to Gonzo as I told him, “In case Declan needs clean-up assistance.”

He nodded and bit into his chicken, and smiled at me as he chewed and swallowed. “You cooked this?”