Grace Alive: a Christian Romance (14 page)

“Zoe? Are you okay? Can I come in there?”
Branson asked.

“Yeah,” I said through my tears and wiped
them with the back of my hand. I looked like crap. Branson rushed
into the girls’ bathroom and bent down to me, his face filled with
love. He pulled me up into his arms and wrapped me in his embrace,
and I buried my face in his neck.

“I’m really sorry, Branson, I’m so
sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, Zoe, not everyone has the
revelation of grace. Not everyone forgives the way my Daddy God
does. Come on, I’ll take you for a drive.” He held my hand and led
me out of the girls’ bathroom, tears still trying to fall from my
eyes. I got a glimpse of my mom’s face as he took me out. She
looked afraid. Disappointed. All I did was disappoint them. I felt
tears spilling again, and Branson helped me into his car and then
climbed in himself.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cry. I’m sorry,”
I mumbled into my arm. I had to stop. I had to stop crying. Their
faces though! I couldn’t get the looks out of my head, of my dad
and his fierce anger toward me, and my mom’s look of defeat. I
started crying again. It wasn’t just about this. It was everything.
All the times I felt not good enough for them. All the times I
didn’t feel good enough to earn God’s love. It all came rushing out
in a waterfall of tears. Branson just rubbed the back of my hand
gently and whispered prayers. He stopped the car, and we just sat
there, him holding my hand and praying and me crying.

“I can never be good enough for them,” I said
and didn’t even bother wiping my tears away anymore.

“Zoe, through Jesus you are good enough. You
don’t have to earn love from Him; He gave it to you freely. Don’t
worry about it. It’s going to be okay.” Branson pulled me into an
embrace, and I let him. I could feel a strange pull toward him, and
I heard the Holy Spirit whisper,
I love you, Zoe. It’s going to
be okay.
A sense of peace completely washed over me, and I let
out a long sigh. How was I going to face my parents when I got home
today?
Peace I give to you not as the world gives…
I heard
the scripture and grabbed a hold of it tight. Branson let me go and
looked at my face.

“You did it. You told them. Now how does this
courting stuff work?” he asked with a smile. I laughed and wiped my
tears off my cheeks.

“It’s easy really. We just hang out
together.” I shyly glanced over at his face. “We hold hands, take
walks, kiss, and in the end we get a good deal.”

He touched my cheek. “Yeah? And what’s that?”
He tucked some of my hair behind my ear.

“You get to be mine forever,” I said. This
was all happening so fast. So, so fast.

“Do you want to get some air?” he asked. I
nodded, and we both climbed out. I came around to his side of the
car.

“You are really beautiful, Zoe,” he said as
he reached for me. I came into his arms and let him just hold me.
He rested his chin against my head.

“Thank you,” I said with a blush.

“This courting stuff is all very new to me,
so I’m not sure how to go about it,” he said and kissed the top of
my head.

“It’s normally a lot smoother than this.” I
sighed.

“I can be smooth.” He turned me around gently
and stared into my eyes. He was so hot. It took me a second to
recover.

“Can I kiss you?” he asked politely.

“Oh…yeah….I…” I stuttered. What if he thought
I was a horrible kisser? I’d never done this before!

“Is this smooth enough?” He bent his lips
down a mere inch from mine. I could feel his breath on my face and
smell his cologne. “Now what?” he asked in a teasing voice.

“Now you kiss me,” I said with a tremble. I
was so nervous!

“Like this?” he said, and his lips met mine.
They were warm and soft. Butterflies exploded in my stomach, and I
wondered if I was doing this right.

“I’ve never done this before, sorry,” I
apologized to him as he pulled away from my lips.

“It’s okay, I’ll teach you,” he said, and
ever so sweetly kissed my lips again.

“Can we try it for a little longer?” I
timidly asked. He interwove his fingers into my hair, and this time
his kiss made my stomach flip-flop like crazy. Oh wow! My love for
him began to pour out of me. With everything that was going on, he
was something good that God had brought me. I had no idea what I
was doing, but I began to explore his mouth in a deeper way. I
heard him gasp as I gripped the back of his head with my fingers.
He trembled beneath my touch. I must be doing okay with this
kissing stuff, because he wasn’t complaining.

I could feel his desire for me, and it made
me want to smile. I fumbled for the car handle and managed to get
the door open. I was so new at this kissing thing; the only thing
I’d ever kissed was the back of my hand. This was much, much better
than that. His fingers brushed my cheek as I pulled him into the
car. I heard his breathing increase, and he ran his hands down my
shoulders. Tingles broke out throughout my skin. His lips went to
my neck, and I gasped at the feelings it invoked. I never thought
kissing would be so amazing. His eyes searched mine with
desperation.

“Zoe,” he said breathlessly, and I felt him
shudder underneath me.

“Yeah?” I hoarsely said, and almost didn’t
recognize my own voice as I kissed his neck lightly. He kissed my
lips again.

“I…Zoe…I…” I felt his inner struggle.
“Please…” he said and lightly pulled away from me. “Please…you have
to stop. I can’t do this…I made a vow to God.” He carefully scooted
me over to sit beside him. I still had my arms wrapped around his
neck. I wanted to still kiss him; I could feel the lingering warmth
of his lips on mine. It felt like a drug.

“What’s wrong? Are you okay?” I asked
him.

“If I keep kissing you something else will
happen, and I made a vow to God.”

My face turned red. I had no idea I was
tempting him like that! To me it was just kisses; obviously it was
much more to Branson.

“I’m really sorry; I don’t want to make you
feel rejected, I just have to be careful,” he said.

“So no more sexy kissing in the back of your
car?” I laughed lightly, trying to lighten the mood. “Got it.”

“Yeah, that was…a little intense,” he
whispered. I blushed again.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to tempt you, I
think I just got caught up in the moment,” I said. I felt bad.

“No, it’s fine. I enjoyed it! That’s the
problem, I enjoyed it too much,” he said and pulled me back into
his arms. I leaned against his chest, and he rested his chin on the
top of my hair.

“Come with me to church Sunday,” Branson
said.

“Okay,” I answered without hesitation. His
arms tightened around me. My dad was going to pop a vein, but I
felt like this was right.

The rest of the week was weird. My parents
kind of avoided me. Dad came to my room one night and tried to
reason with me, but I just pushed his condemnation to the side. He
was trying to guilt me into leaving Branson, and that wasn’t going
to happen. I just heard the Holy Spirit encourage me more about it
each time my dad said the opposite. Wednesday was a little awkward
with Jacob. He tried to approach me, but I avoided him the whole
night. The weekend was coming fast, and I felt nervous about
skipping our church for Grace Alive. I’d told my dad, and he just
rebuked the crap out of me.

Sunday morning rolled around, and Branson was
waiting outside my house for me. I hurried outside wearing a solid
black shirt that had glitter along one shoulder, a dark purple
skirt that ruffled, and my tall black boots. My hair was swept to
the side in ringlets. I got into Branson’s car, and he grinned at
me.

“You look great!” We’d talked on the phone a
lot the last couple days. He’d been helping me deal with my
parents’ disapproval.

“Thanks, Branson,” I said and turned around
to blow kisses at the three little munchkins in the backseat.

“Hi, guys!” I said.

“Zoe! Zoe!” the twins said together and
giggled. Bree chuckled and cooed. Her sisters tickled her
tummy.

“Let’s go to church!” Branson said, and we
rolled out of my driveway. My parents had already left for the
morning for which I was grateful. I really didn’t want them to see
the kids just yet. They would flip a lid. The ride to Grace Alive
was filled with silly singing, giggles, and Bree throwing up on
herself. That part wasn’t the best, but luckily Branson was used to
this kind of thing and had brought three sets of clothes with him.
He shouldered a backpack and unbuckled Bree while I helped the
twins out of their seats.

When we were all finally out of the car, we
started walking toward Grace Alive. It was a barn. What! It was the
most unusual building I had ever seen. There was a field, a fence,
and a big old barn sitting in the middle of it all. There were cars
scattered all over the place, and little kids running around near a
small jungle gym that had been set up. The twins wanted to run and
play with the other kids, so Branson let them run off.

“There’s some ushers that keep an eye on
them. I’ll just go change Bree really quick.” We stepped inside the
barn, and I looked up in surprise. It was the most untraditional
looking church I had ever seen. The ceiling was high, and there was
lights strung on the beams like a barn yard dance. The floor was
cement and older chairs were lined up in several rows. People were
mingling and drinking coffee, and I heard the worship team warming
up. We were around 45 minutes early.

“Hi, guys!” he said to a few people who were
standing in a group. “This is Zoe! I’ll be right back. Gotta clean
puke off Bree Bree.” He tickled the little girl’s neck, and she
giggled.

“Oh, I’ll change her, Branson!” a girl with
an extremely short haircut said with a smile. She was dressed in a
solid black dress and had a hot pink shoulder bag. She looked kind
of Goth to me.

“Thanks, Alison, that’d be awesome.” He
handed the little girl over to the woman who started cooing to the
baby.

“Who’s all stinky, aw, Bree Bree did you spit
up?” She took the baby away, toting the backpack on her shoulder. I
watched her go in wonder.

“Your girlfriend is amazing, Jack,” Branson
said to a tall, skinny guy with a slightly crooked nose. The tall
guy nodded and smiled.

“She’s great,” Jack said. The others in the
group started all talking, and I wasn’t sure what to say.

“First time at Grace Alive, Zoe?” one girl
said. I think her name was Jen? I couldn’t remember. They’d all
introduced themselves, but my brain was forgetful with all that was
going on. People were trickling in. They looked, to put it nicely,
like heathens. Weird bunch.

“I think we’re freaking her out, Branson.”
The girl I thought was Jen gave me a reassuring smile. She had
streaks of aqua blue in the ends of her dyed black hair, was
wearing a sweater with a fox on it, and had on orange pants.

“She’ll be fine, Jen, it’s just a lot to take
in,” another girl said with really cutely painted fingernails. They
were little pandas on her nails. Nailed it! I thought her name was
Jen.

“This is a judgment free zone, it’s kind of
hard when you first come in, and you see a bunch of crazy looking
people.” Jen smiled at me.

“Oh, I…” My words were cut off as a guy came
walking up to us with a grin. He was a tall guy, around 6’3, broad
chest, dark brown hair, and tattoos literally from head to toe. He
had to be roughly 32 or so? He was wearing a green t-shirt, a black
vest, and a nice pair of jeans.

“Pastor Dom!” Jen said and pulled the man
into a huge hug. That was Pastor Dom? I felt myself choking. He
looked like a rock star singer! My dad would have a cow! After he’d
finished embracing Jen, he looked straight at me. I felt this love
overwhelm me. Whoa. I felt a tingling from the tips of my toes all
the way through my body. As if Jesus was looking straight into my
eyes.

“I’m Pastor Dom, welcome to Grace Alive
Church,” he said in a low baritone voice. I shook his hand, and he
pulled me into a bear hug. Okay.

“Branson!” he called and pulled Branson into
a hug after he’d finished with me. “How’s it going, man? How’s the
little princesses?” He let Branson go and gripped his arms. “I’ve
been interceding for you lately. Has everything been okay?” The
intensity of this man was overwhelming. I could feel the presence
of God all over him. I’d never felt anything like that before. Just
love. Pure love oozed from him.

“Can we talk about it later, Pastor?” Branson
asked with a smile.

“Sure can!” He turned to the group of people
and hugged the rest of them. I was in shock. This was not what I
had expected. Sure, I had expected something different, but this
was like dramatically different. A pastor who was tattooed and
wearing jeans! What in the world! Alison came back with Bree, and
Branson took her into his arms and held her close. We made our way
toward the nursery just before church was to begin. He dropped his
baby off to a nice looking lady who looked more like the
traditional churchgoer in my opinion. She set Bree down with a
bunch of blocks as we walked away.

“You alright, Zoe? You look like you’re in
shock.” Branson laughed as he led me to the third row of the barn
church.

“Yeah. I’m just taking it all in. This is
just really, really different than my church.” We slid into the row
by the other people I met. I couldn’t really remember all their
names. A pretty girl, with blond hair and a black layer underneath,
ripped skinny jeans, and a turquoise swooping shirt held a
microphone in her hand. A whole band was upfront. A guy who was
playing guitar had an actual Mohawk. The piano started in with just
solid strings, and the girl put the mic up to her lips. What came
out was the most amazing melody I had ever heard. She wasn’t even
singing words, just ooing and ahhing really, but something shifted
in the atmosphere, and I felt people begin to respond to it.