Guardian of the Gate (25 page)

Regret is like a dagger in my chest as I realize the reason Aunt Abigail has fallen so ill; she has given all of her remaining strength to me via the stone. She must have been aware of Alice’s increasing strength, and I wonder if she knew as well about Sonia’s betrayal. I cannot bear to ask if I am the cause of her weakness. Cannot bear to know. And in any case, there is no undoing what is already done. It is far smarter, and far kinder, to use our time wisely.

“Thank you, Aunt Abigail, but what if it is not enough? When your power leaves the stone… what if I cannot provide enough to ward off the Souls until I can bring the prophecy to an end?”

Her smile is faint, but it is there. In it, I see the life force that has guided the Sisters for decades. “You are stronger than you know, my child. It will be enough.”

Her words ring through my memory. In an instant, I am transported back to the morning at Birchwood when Aunt
Virginia gave me the letter my mother wrote just before her death.
You are wiser than you believe, dear heart. And stronger than you know,
Aunt Virginia had said.

Aunt Abigail closes her eyes for a moment. When she opens them again, they burn with new intensity. “You must uncover the pages.”

I nod. “Tell me where they are, and I will use them to end the prophecy.”

She grasps my hand tighter. “I cannot… tell you.”

I shake my head. “But… that is why I’ve come. Why you
asked
me to come. Don’t you remember, Aunt Abigail?”

“It is not memory that fails me, my child.”

I still don’t understand.

Aunt Abigail’s eyes roam the room, though she is too tired to move her head. She lowers her voice even further so that I must strain to hear her. “There are… many ears in the Sanctuary. Some of them will use that which they overhear to aid the cause of the Sisters. Others will use it to aid a cause of their own.”

I look up, noting one Sister folding bedsheets near the window. I do not know where the other has gone, but Una is grinding something with a mortar and pestle and mixing the powder in a glass while Dimitri still leans against the wall by the door.

I turn back to Aunt Abigail. “But how will I find the pages if you cannot tell me where to look?”

Her hand leaves mine, grasping my arm and pulling me closer so that I am mere inches from her dry, cracked lips. “You
will leave the day after tomorrow. Your father’s trusted companion, Edmund, will see you safely off the island and to your first meeting point. A new guide will lead you for each segment of travel. Only Dimitri will accompany you the whole way. He has been in my service for some time. I trust him implicitly.”

Her gaze meets mine, and I think I see a twinkle of pride. “No one person will know the way of your journey. Rather, each guide will be responsible for only a small portion of it. Even the final guide will not know his segment is the last. He will be told it is only one of many stops.”

I sit up, feeling a surge of love and pride for my aunt. Even ill and dying, her mind and will do not fail her. Still, I am not as trusting as I once was.

“What if one of the guides should abandon us or fall to the Souls?”

“The guides have been chosen carefully, but you are wise to allow for every possibility,” she rasps. “That is why I am prepared to tell you and only you what you must know.”

She motions me toward her, and I lean down.

“Come closer, my dear.” I position my ear near her lips, and she whispers only one word.
“Chartres.”

I straighten, puzzling over the word. I know I have heard it correctly, but I don’t know what it means. “I don’t — ”

She interrupts with a whisper.
“At the feet of the Guardian. Not a Virgin, but a Sister.”
Her eyes dart around the room. “As long as you have crossed the sea, my words will guide you. Should you be forced to continue alone, I trust you have enough now to find your way.”

I mouth the single word, liking the feel of it on my tongue, and commit the strange phrase to memory. The faintest sense of familiarity lies within it, though I cannot recall anyone ever speaking it aloud until now.

Una appears on the other side of the bed holding the cup into which she was mixing the ground powder. She smiles sadly.

“I believe Lady Abigail requires rest now.”

I look down at my grandmother’s sister. She is already fast asleep, and I lean in and kiss her hot forehead. “Sleep well, Aunt Abigail.”

Una places the cup on the bedside table. “I am sorry, Lia. Is there anything I can do to ease your sorrow?”

I shake my head. “Just make her comfortable, I suppose.”

She nods. “I’ve brewed something to ease her pain, but I don’t want to wake her when she is finally resting comfortably. I’ll watch over her, though. When she awakes, I’ll make sure she is not in pain.” She smiles. “You should rest. You still look quite tired yourself.”

I do not realize the truth in her words until she says them, and then, all at once, exhaustion falls over me. “Will you come and get me the moment she is awake? I should like to spend all the time I can with her before…”

Una nods in understanding. “I’ll fetch you the moment she regains consciousness. I promise.”

I walk on shaking legs to meet Dimitri by the door. He takes my hand, and we step into the hall, closing the door behind us.

“We should get you to bed,” he says. “You will need all your strength in the coming days.”

I look up at him as we walk. “What do you know about the location of the pages?”

His expression narrows in contemplation. “Very little. I’ve only been told to prepare for travel and that you and I, together with Edmund as our guide, will be leaving the day after tomorrow.”

I nod. Though I trust Dimitri completely, I have already vowed to honor my aunt’s confidence. I will not tell him of the words whispered within the sacred walls of her room.

“Dimitri?”

“Hmmm?” We turn a corner, and I recognize the hallway leading to my room.

“I must see Sonia before we leave.”

I feel guilty that I have not insisted until now, but I have not been certain of my own strength. I want to believe that my sense of forgiveness is strong enough to overcome anything, but I am still reeling from the shock of Sonia’s betrayal. I suppose I will not know, truly, my ability to forgive her until I see her again. And so, see her I must before I leave Altus, perhaps for the last time.

Dimitri stops at the door to my room, and I see the working of his mind behind the shadow of worry in his eyes.

“Are you certain that’s a good idea? The Elders
do
say that she has improved, but perhaps it would be better to wait until she is completely well and we have returned from our journey.”

“No. I need to see her, Dimitri. I will not rest until I do, and I really should have done so much sooner.”

“Nothing could have been gained by seeing her as she was when she arrived on Altus, and the Elders would have forbidden it anyway. But if you feel it necessary to see her before we leave, I will speak to them and arrange for a visit tomorrow.”

I stand on tiptoe and wrap my arms around Dimitri’s neck. “Thank you,” I say, before touching my lips to his.

He returns my kiss with barely contained passion before pulling away. “
You
must rest, Lia. I will see you in the morning.”

I lean my forehead against his chest. “I don’t want you to go.”

His fingers move through the curls at the back of my head. “Then I won’t.”

I look up at him. “What… what do you mean?”

He shrugs. “I will sleep on your floor if you like, or anywhere else you would like me to stay. There is no shame in it. Not here. And,” he says, his eyes twinkling with mischief, “I’ve already told you that I will honor your society’s rules whether or not you wish it.”

There is a remnant of my brain, the one that was instructed by Miss Gray at Wycliffe in all matters of propriety, thet wonders at my own lack of shame, but it is only a candle compared to the fire building within. It is not a fire stoked by my growing feelings for Dimitri. Not those alone. It is lit by my own exhilaration at the knowledge that there may be another way,
another path, open to me yet. That my options may not be as limited as I once believed.

I cannot help smiling. “All right, then. I want you to stay.”

He opens the door to my room. “Then stay I will.”

I do not change for bed. Remembering the state in which I woke up this morning, I am not entirely certain I have a choice. Having a man in my room overnight is scandalous enough, even for my own newly burgeoning sense of freedom. Having a man in my room while I am naked, even under the covers, would be impossible for me to justify, even in the mystical world of Altus.

I make myself comfortable on the bed while Dimitri retrieves blankets and pillows from the wardrobe and spreads them out on the floor. When he crosses the room and parts the curtains over the big window, I discover that it is not a window at all, but a set of double doors like those in Aunt Abigail’s room.

He opens one of the doors halfway, turning to me. “Do you mind? I like the breeze off the water.”

I shake my head. “I didn’t realize it opened.”

He comes back to the bed, tucking the thick coverlet around me. “Now you’ll be warm while you sleep to the sound of the sea.”

He leans in and kisses me chastely on the lips. “Good night, Lia.”

I feel shy despite our close proximity. “Good night.”

He blows out the candle by the bed, and I hear him settle into the blankets on the floor. It does not last long, though,
for the bed is wide and unfamiliar, and I do not like thinking of Dimitri on the cold floor.

“Dimitri?”

“Hmmm?”

“Would it be possible for you to sleep in my bed while… honoring the laws of my society?” I wonder if he can hear the smile in my voice.

“Quite possible.”

I am certain I hear the smile in his.

“My goodness!” Luisa’s voice startles me from a deep slumber. “I daresay you have grown quite used to the ways of the island!”

I sit up, untangling myself from Dimitri’s arms. He opens his eyes slowly, not at all startled by Luisa’s abrupt morning greeting.

“Yes, well, for the sake of my remaining sense of propriety, let’s keep this between us, shall we?”

Luisa raises her eyebrows. “I shall keep your secrets if you keep mine.”

“I don’t know any of your secrets. At least not any of the more recent ones.” I stretch, fighting the urge to lay back down with Dimitri.

“A situation I might be able to remedy if you send your
heathen island boy away while you bathe and dress.” She marches to the wardrobe.

I do not want Dimitri to leave, not even for a moment. But I do need to prepare for my visit with Sonia, and I would also like to check on Aunt Abigail.

I lean down and kiss Dimitri softly on the lips while Luisa digs through the wardrobe, her back turned to us.

“I’m sorry,” I say.

He runs a finger from the messy hair at my temple down my cheekbone and neck, all the way to the point where the neckline of my robe begins. “It’s quite all right. I need to dress and speak to the Elders about your meeting with Sonia. I’ll be back to fetch you in a while.”

I nod. “Thank you for staying.”

“Thank
you
,” he says, grinning. “It was the best night’s sleep I have had in some time.” He rises from the bed and turns to Luisa, standing at the foot of the bed with a fresh robe in her arms. “The rest of the island already knows of my feelings for Lia. I couldn’t care less if they know where I spent the night, but on her behalf, I thank you for your discretion.”

She rolls her eyes. “Yes, yes. Be gone now, will you? I shall never get her out of this room if you don’t leave!”

“Very well, then.” He smiles, making his way out of the room without further word.

Luisa bursts into laughter the moment he is gone.

“What?” I try to feign innocence, but the heat on my cheeks makes me suspect I have failed.

She throws the robe at me. “Don’t be coy with me, Lia Milthorpe. I know you too well.”

“I’m not being coy.” I shrug. “Nothing happened. He… honors the laws of our society.”

The laughter begins as a giggle she can contain behind her hand and builds to a full-fledged howl that causes her to fall onto the bed next to me. I am slightly offended by her mocking laughter but cannot manage a word in my defense or Dimitri’s. Luisa is too busy gasping for air to hear me anyway, and worse, it is contagious.

I do not want to join her on principle. I am, after all, the subject of the ill-begotten humor. But I cannot help myself, and soon we are both laughing so hard that tears run down Luisa’s cheeks and my stomach folds in on itself in pain. Our laughter subsides a little at a time until we are laying side by side atop the coverlet, our breath coming in increasingly slower heaves.

“Now that you have had a good laugh at my expense, why don’t you tell me about your night with Rhys?” I say, staring at the ceiling.

“Well, I can tell you one thing: I do not think ‘honoring the laws of our society’ is” — she begins laughing again — “very high on his list of priorities.”

I throw a pillow at her. “Very well. Have a good laugh. But while you and Rhys satisfy your less virtuous desires, I think it very selfless that Dimitri cares about the customs of our society.”

“You are quite right, Lia.” I can hear her trying to quell the laughter rising yet again. “Dimitri is every bit the gentleman. I only thank God that Rhys is not!”

“Oh… you! You’re impossible!” I sit up, grabbing the clean robe and trying to keep a straight face. “Did you say something about a bath? I should very much like to know where to get one.”

“You have always been good at changing the subject.” I cannot dispute her words, but she lets it go, and for that, I am grateful. She sits up and rises to a standing position. “I will have someone fetch you a tub and fill it with hot water. They will bring it to you, I’m sure, as they did for me.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” She makes her way to the door and opens it to step into the hallway. Before she closes it behind her, she looks back. “I was only teasing before, Lia.”