Authors: Marin Thomas
“I think we'd all love it! I'll talk to the girls and Buck about it.”
“Good.”
“Just so you know, I was reading over your notes on the meeting with Dawson when Willy came in the office and told me what was going on. We'll get together later with Buck and talk about it.”
“I've got a feeling about this well, Carson.”
“Yeah?” His friend's blue eyes darkened with emotion. Ross was glad Carson wasn't going to let his grandfather's reservations prevent them from trying this experiment. If it was successful, he'd be perpetuating the Lundgren legacy far into the future. One day Johnny and any other children they might have would be in charge and it would go on from there. “Your hunch means a hell of a lot.”
On that happy note, Ross took off for the cabin. Instead of knocking, he called through the door so they'd know who was on the other side.
Andy flung it open. The concern on his face was too much. Without thinking, Ross pulled him into his arms and gave him a hug. The boy clung to him. “I was proud of the way you handled yourself in front of the sheriff. That took real courage.”
“That's what I told him.”
Ross saw Kit standing in the background and let go of Andy. “Neither of you should have been forced to go through that experience. If there'd been any other way...” His voice grated. “But since he had a warrant, I couldn't stop him or warn you. He had to come out here and see for himself.”
“I know, and believe it or not, I'm not sorry. I've had a lifetime learning experience within the last half hour. Not only did I discover new things about myself, I learned a lot about my son who's much stronger than I'd ever imagined he could be, thanks to your example. And there's something else.”
“What's that?”
“Andy, honey? Would you mind going outside for just a minute? I need to talk to Ross in private.”
“Okay.” He grabbed his cap gun and went out the door.
She shut it and backed up against it. “Andy doesn't know that this morning I listened to Corinne's phone message, and I have to admit it shook me up a little. But no longer. After this experience, I know I'm doing the right thing to move out. There's a cruel streak in Charles. I'm positive Florence is disturbed by it, but long ago she made the choice to stay and support him.
“By sending that sheriff out here, he's committed the ultimate crime against Andy, in my opinion. No child should have to endure what happened today because Charles is upset with me.”
“Amen.”
Kit took a second breath. “He's done an unconscionable act.”
Ross knew he was talking to the most extraordinary woman he'd ever met. For years she'd undergone a form of emotional abuse within the walls of the Wentworth mansion. He couldn't find the words to tell her how pained he was for her ordeal. But she was standing up to Charles. That told Ross what this woman was really made of.
In the next breath his hands shot out on either side of her, trapping her. The heat generated by their bodies worked like an aphrodisiac on Ross. His body moved closer until they were molded to each other.
“
Rossâ
noâwe mustn't.”
Her voice came out on a strangled whisper.
“A man can only take so much. I warned you.”
He lowered his head and covered her mouth with his own, parting her lips because his hunger was so great. At first she held back, but with each kiss he drove deeper and deeper; she began to succumb until they were giving kiss for kiss.
Her response released an explosion of feeling he could hardly contain. While he was immersed in sensual ecstasy, she wound her arms around his waist, creating greater intimacy. Driven by this mindless passion for her, time ceased to exist.
“You have no idea how beautiful you are to me, Kit. I'm talking inside and out.” Their kisses grew more prolonged. Somehow he'd moved so his back was against the door and his legs were cradling hers. Each kiss felt natural. Her soft, sweet body melted into his. He couldn't get enough of her as their mouths clung.
“I want you,” he cried, “but you already know that.” The feel and taste of her transcended any of his dreams. She was all warmth and beauty. Slowly their kisses grew more urgent. He pressed her closer, running his hands through her hair and over her back.
“I've been so afraid for you to touch me,” came her feverish response.
“There's nothing to be afraid of. How could there be?” Growing along with his desire was this powerful need to protect her. Ross wanted to make up to her for the years she'd suffered at the hands of the Wentworth men.
Charles had been so blessed to have a daughter-in-law as sweet as Kit. Since his son's passing, he'd figuratively trampled her beneath his feet and had lost a lot of the love of his grandson in the process. Ross couldn't comprehend it or the sorrow she'd suffered, having lost a spouse who hadn't been there for her. If Kit would let him love her in all the ways she needed to be loved...
“You don't understand. This can't go onâ” She tore her lips from his on a moan.
“Why are you pulling away from me?” he asked.
“Because I feel...cheap.”
Ross was incredulous. “Do
I
make you feel that way?”
She eyed him with a frazzled look. “Of course not. It's not you.”
“Then explain what you mean. You owe me that much.”
“I owe you
everything!
” she cried. “That's the problem. I only arrived here last Saturday. Set free from my prison, I've already taken your protection, your good will. I've involved your partners in the ugliness of my life. Andy and I have taken up all your time.”
“We invited you here, remember?”
“Yes I remember, but my husband only died ten months ago, and yet I'm here in this cabin making out with you like a high school girl looking for a good time with the first guy to look my way.”
“By your own admission you fell out of love years ago. It's a wonder you've taken this long to feel alive again. I'm only thankful it's happened with me because you've made me feel alive again, too.”
“But this is wrong.”
He needed to understand. “Surely you realize that's your fear talking.”
“Yes. I know it is and I'm sorry, Ross. Forgive me for venting,” she begged. “I must seem like the most mixed-up, ungrateful wretch who ever lived. Can we just start over again and forget what has happened?”
Ross studied her features. “No. At least
I
can't. To try to forget would be pointless when I'd be fighting against nature. Would it surprise you to know I wanted to kiss you before I left the cabin the first day?”
Kit smoothed the hair away from her temples. “You didn't even like me.”
“You're wrong. I didn't want to like you for the reasons we've already talked about, but I couldn't help myself.”
“Now you're simply trying to make me feel better like you always do.”
He let out a bark of harsh laughter. “I'm glad to hear that. Don't you know I'm trying to be as honest with you as I can? Here this grieving woman comes to the ranch with her grieving son at our invitation and I find myself desiring you. What does that say about me? So much for my being a saint.”
She shook her head. “Don't you see? We shouldn't be spending this much time together alone.”
“But we haven't actually been alone until now.”
“And look what's happened!”
“Didn't you enjoy it?”
“Yes, but it was a guilty enjoyment I'm not proud of.”
“Guilty?” he whispered.
“Yes. Don't ask me to explain.”
“Then after I've figured it out, how about we try it again and see if you haven't changed your mind.”
She pressed her hands against his chest. “Ross?”
“Yes?” He coughed.
“Please, be serious.”
“In other words, try to pretend that you're not a beautiful woman I'd like to get to know better?”
Kit swallowed hard. “You don't want to know me.”
“What in the hell does that mean?”
“You deserve a woman who can be your counterpart in every way. If we'd met under ordinary circumstances, you would have gotten your full measure of me in about two minutes and passed on by.”
“Two minutes? You don't give yourself any credit, or me for having discernment.”
“You're just being a gentleman. That's the trouble with you. I'll never get to know the Ross Livingston who lives inside his own skin. You're saving that for the special woman who'll come along one day. That's one of the reasons why it would be wrong for us to get physical because of chemistry alone.”
“What's the other reason?”
“Andy and I will be gone soon. I don't want to leave with regrets.”
“Do you regret kissing me?”
“Yes.”
“I think you actually meant that.”
“I do. The fact is, I need a clear head.”
“So any intimate involvement with me would muddy the waters?”
“After my past with the Wentworth men, I don't need more complications that will lead nowhere.”
She'd pressed on a nerve. “You think having a relationship with me will lead nowhere?”
“I didn't mean that the way it sounded. All I'm saying is, it would be better if we don't start up anything. In a few days I'll be gone. My whole focus needs to be on making a home for Andy and getting on with a career.”
On a groan of protest he buried his face in her dark, luxuriant hair. “A fire's been lit. There's no way we can let each other go. Not now, not ever.”
Somewhere in the periphery he heard children's voices and caps firing. “
Mom?
The kids are here. Can we come in?”
“Rossâwe have to stop!” Kit sounded frantic.
He pressed another hot kiss to her mouth before finally releasing her and taking a step away. “Only for now,” he vowed and staggered his way over to the fridge. He opened a can of pop while he tried to get himself under some semblance of control.
One look at Kit and he saw she was having the same problem. She rushed into the bathroom and shut the door.
“Come on in, guys!” he called to the children and opened the front door.
Johnny was the first inside. “Daddy told us we're going on a campout tomorrow.”
Ross stood there with his hands on his hips, still shaken by the desire he felt for her. “What's this? No hello first?”
Jenny came inside with Andy. “Hi, Uncle Ross.”
“That's more like it. Hi, yourself! Did you guys have fun at the movie?”
“Yes. Are we going to Secret Lake?”
His laugh brought on a cough. That was the kids' favorite place on the ranch so far and the first thing on their minds. “Nope. We're going to one you've never seen before.”
“Huh?” Johnny looked shocked. “Another lake?”
“It looks like a sea horse,” Andy spoke up.
“Andy's right,” he said when he saw the other children's surprised expressions. “Carson calls it Bluebell Lake because of the wild bluebells that grow near the tail. Since we're going to be doing some hiking, we won't be taking the ponies this time. We'll go up in the truck and set up camp.”
“Goody!”
Kit came into the living room. Except for her glazed eyes, she looked composed for someone who'd just been kissed senseless. “I'm so glad to see all of you. You're just in time for us to go to dinner.”
Jenny stared up at her. “After we eat, will you read some more to us about Buck?”
“Absolutely. I'm glad you reminded me.” She reached for the book on the coffee table.
“Let's go.”
“Everybody, pile in the truck!” Ross helped Jenny before he started the engine. Kit put on a good front, but he knew she was quaking inside over what had happened and would never be the same again.
Neither would he.
Chapter Eight
“Nila? Is this a bad time to call you?” It was nine o'clock at night. Kit and Andy had just gotten back from the ranch house.
“It's a great time. What's going on?”
After Kit had finished the first chapter of the Jack London book for the children, she and Andy had said good-night to everyone and come straight home. While he was in the living room watching TV in his pajamas, she paced the bedroom floor.
“For one thing, the local sheriff paid a visit to my cabin earlier today. Guess who got a court order to make sure I hadn't left Wyoming yet?” She kept no secrets from Nila.
“I'm not surprised. The sooner you get here, the better I'm going to feel.”
She gripped the phone tighter. “That's why I'm calling. Ross has arranged an overnight camping trip for tomorrow with the children andâ”
“Ross?” Nila broke in.
“Mr. Livingston, one of the partners here on the dude ranch. He's been the one in charge of us.”
“Hmm. A retired marine. How old is he?”
“Early thirties I think.”
“Tall, dark and handsome?”
“You got it in one.”
“You're kidding.”
“No. The cliché fits him down to his well-worn cowboy boots.”
“Oh, boy.”
“Oh, boy is right, but I don't dare talk about him at the moment. Because of this overnight outing, we'll be away from the ranch where Charles won't be able to find us
if
that's on his agenda. That's a good thing. We'll get back sometime Wednesday.
“Since my father-in-law knows my original flight arrangements, which have us flying back to Maine on Saturday, I'm thinking of leaving the ranch on Friday just to throw him off. That is if Andy can handle it. The children he's gotten to know here start school on Thursday and will be in class on Friday, as well. Knowing that, Andy might not mind leaving a day early.” Kit knew she was avoiding how Andy would feel about leaving Ross. Never mind her own feelings.
“I've looked at the airline schedules and have booked a flight out to Salt Lake. From there we'll get a connection and be in Galveston at 5:30. I know it's a day earlier than we planned, but I think it's for the best.” It was best for Kit. Ross had her so bewitched, she couldn't think clearly. “Don't worry about picking us up. We'll take a taxi to your house.”
Andy wouldn't like it, but seeing the writing on the wall with Ross, she realized she needed to get away from him before she broke down and made a mistake she'd never recover from. While they were on the campout, the children would be her buffer. After that she would make certain they did safe activities with Ross until it was time to leave.
“I'm going to pick you up, Kit. Just let me know the time.”
“All right. You're the best friend in the world.”
“Ditto. How's Andy?”
“As you know, he didn't want to come out here at first, but now he's loving it.”
“Something tells me Ross Livingston has a lot to do with his turnaround.”
He had everything to do with it.
“Ross and his partners. They and their families have shown Andy such a great time already. He's never had this kind of attention and doesn't want to leave. But he doesn't want to live with his grandparents anymore, so he's willing to see what Galveston is like.”
“He's a little trooper. We'll do everything we can here to make him happy. Kim's looking forward to it.”
“I am, too. It'll be great seeing you again. Until Friday night, then.”
Kit hung up and went back to the living room. Andy was munching on a granola bar. “Aren't you too full from dinner to eat that?”
“No. I just felt like one. They're really good. Do you want a bite?”
“Thank you, but I don't dare eat any more snacks or I'm going to gain weight.” Needing to do something with her nervous energy, she sat down at the table to keep working on the puzzle.
With each day Kit noticed more changes in him. A new confidence had taken hold, one she was grateful to see. The shadows and furtive looks seemed to be disappearing. She wanted him to stay like this and dreaded telling him they were leaving Friday. But that could wait until Wednesday evening after they'd returned from their overnight trip.
“Mom? Do you like Ross?”
His question didn't exactly surprise her. She'd known it would come up at some point, just not this soon. “Who wouldn't like him?”
He wandered over to the table to watch her. “Do you think you'll ever get married again?”
She felt a sudden burst of adrenaline. “Where did that question come from?”
“Johnny and Jenny were talking about it while we were playing Ping-Pong after dinner.”
“I see.” Kit had to force herself not to overreact. “That's because their mothers both got married recently.”
“They wish you would marry Ross.”
She couldn't help smiling. “They do?”
“Yes. They love Ross and think you are really nice.”
“Well, that's nice to hear.” Kit believed what her son was telling her, but she also believed Andy was projecting some of his own feelings where Ross was concerned. “You like him a lot, don't you?”
“Will you get mad at me if I tell you the truth?”
She reached out to hug him. “I could never get mad at you for being honest. Not ever.”
“Now that my dad is gone, I wish Ross could be my new dad.”
Oh, no, Andy.
Kit got up from the table and walked over to the minifridge for a can of cola.
“See? You
are
mad.”
“No, honey.”
“Yes, you are. You don't want me to like him because of Dad.”
She spun around, almost spilling her drink. “That's not true. I know how much you loved your father and always will, but now that he's gone, it doesn't mean you can't learn to love someone else. Ross is a wonderful man, and any boy would be blessed to have him for a father. But in order for that to happenâ”
“I know,” he broke in before she could finish. “He'd have to love me the way Carson loves Johnny.” Sometimes Andy sounded wise beyond his years. Just now the wistfulness in his tone crept into her heart. His gray eyes squinted up at her. “If he asked you, would you marry him? Johnny says Ross really, really likes you.”
“Andyâ” She shouldn't have taken that second swallow and choked on it. “We hardly know each other!” Insecurity was driving her son to say these things. “It's too soon for me to think about getting married. I want to work and take care of you. That Johnnyâhe does way too much talking.”
“He's funny, Mom.”
“I agree, but he sometimes says things he shouldn't.”
“That's what Ross says. Did you know his parents got married five weeks after they came to the ranch? Jenny said her parents got married in private after ten days.”
Kit put the can on the table. “I know their marriages happened fast.” Incredibly fast. It was hard to believe, and yet these retired marines were exceptional men. It was no wonder Alex and Tracy had fallen in love with them.
But for those four people to marry so soon and be sure... Kit had been so sure when she'd married Winn, never realizing the nightmare that awaited her. The thought of going into another marriage where she could be dominated was frightening.
When the house phone rang, she jumped.
“I bet that's Ross!” Andy ran in the bedroom.
“Waitâ” She followed, but he was too quick for her and picked up. “Hello?” After a pause, “Hi! Yeah! I'm in my pajamas. Hey, Mom? Can Ross come over and help us with the puzzle? He says he's not tired yet and I'm not either.”
Ross had a definite reason for wanting to come over, but she didn't know what it was. As usual he knew how to handle Andy so he wouldn't get alarmed. In fact, her son was thrilled. “If he'd really like to.”
Andy repeated her message before he hung up. “He says he's driving over now.”
Right or wrong or unwise, he was coming and Kit couldn't do anything about it. With her heart thudding in her chest, she hurried in the bathroom to brush her hair and put on some lipstick.
Before long they heard the knock on the door, and Andy opened it. Ross's gaze darted to her. “Thanks for letting me come. I have the whole top floor of the ranch house to myself. Sometimes it gets lonely.”
“My grandparents' mansion felt the same way to me when I had to go to bed.”
Andy's comment squeezed her heart. “Well, tonight nobody's lonely.”
Ross coughed. “Mind if I help with the puzzle?”
“Be our guest.”
The three of them sat down at the table.
“I'm glad I don't have to go away to that school.”
“I didn't like the boarding school I went to,” Ross interjected. He'd already found some puzzle pieces that fit. “I only got to go home once a month.”
“Johnny and Jenny are lucky they get to go to school in Jackson.”
“I agree, except they're kind of scared.”
“Why?”
“Well, Johnny went to school in Ohio before he came here, and Jenny was in school in California. They don't have any friends yet except each other. It's going to take them a little time to adjust at Snake River Elementary, but they're tough.”
Kit suspected Ross was trying to prepare Andy for when they went to Texas.
“That's a funny name for a school.”
Ross chuckled. “Speaking of snakes, has Johnny told you about the pet snake he keeps in his room? His name is Fred.”
“Fred?” Both of them broke into laughter.
“No one knows why he picked that name. Last month Jenny gave him a T-shirt for his birthday that has a snake on the front. The writing above says âFred's Dad.'”
Kit smiled. “That's one shirt I've got to see. He's such a character.”
“So's Jenny. She's the one who thought it up and designed it.”
“They're both precious.”
Andy looked at Ross. “Do you want to see a picture of my dad?”
Kit was stunned. More and more he was opening up around Ross. Already she knew Andy wouldn't want to leave here when the time came.
“I was hoping you'd show one to me.”
“I'll get it.” He was back in a flash. “Here he is.”
Ross took the five-by-seven framed photo from him. “I've seen other pictures of him, but this one is special. He's one fine-looking marine you can be proud of. When you're a man, you're going to look a lot like him.”
“Thanks. Did you like being a marine?”
“I learned to like it a lot.”
“I don't want to be one. They get killed.”
“You're right. Some of them do.” His black brows lifted as he looked at Andy. “You know what? That's the great thing about being your own person. You get to do what you want with your own life. What do you think you'd like to be?”
“I've been thinking about that, but I don't know yet.”
Kit couldn't believe what she'd just heard. Andy was talking like a grown-up.
“Well, you've got years to find out.”
“Do you like being a rancher?”
“I love it, but I didn't know I wanted to be one until Carson invited me to his ranch last March.”
“What happened?”
“Well, we got on horses, and he showed me the whole property. I felt like I was seeing country no other man had ever seen or walked on. Each time we came to a different spot, I marveled at the wild beauty of the land and the mountains. I felt like it was calling to me and I had to be a part of it.”
Kit got gooseflesh while he described his feelings.
“As we rode, he told me the stories about his ancestors and how they came to settle here. It was such a different world from the one I'd come from, it was like I'd been living on a different planet. I kept thinking a man could live here, put down roots and be happy.
“The truth is, Andy, I'd never truly been happy because I had a dad who expected me to be a certain way all the time.”
“Did he die?”
“No. He and my mom live in Houston, Texas, the home of the big oil wells. I have a married brother Scott and a married sister Georgianna, but I call her Georgie Porgie. She doesn't like that.” Andy laughed. “I love them a lot, but I have to do my own thing.”
“My dad had to do what my grandfather said.”
He cocked his head. “But from now on, you and your mom get to do what
you
want. Right?”
“Yeah. Thanks for talking to me.”
“Anytime.”
Afraid she'd break down bawling if she heard any more, Kit said, “With that settled, it's getting late, honey. We've had a huge day. You need to brush your teeth and get to bed.”
“Okay. Good night, Ross.”
He handed the picture back to him. “Thanks for showing this to me. Get a good sleep. I'll see you in the morning. We'll pack up and head for Bluebell Lake.”
“Yeah!”
Andy gave Kit a hug and left the room. No sooner had he shut the door to the hall than Kit's cell phone rang. Ross shot her a glance.
She reached for it, but for the first time she didn't get that sick feeling inside. “It's Charles. He never gives up. I'm going to turn off the ringer so I won't be bothered for the rest of the night.”
“That sounds like a good idea.”
After fixing it, she said, “What's the real reason you came over tonight?”
He lounged back in the chair and extended his long legs. “I'm going to ask you a question, but you don't have to answer it. In fact you can tell me to take a hike.”
She chuckled. “I'd never do that.”
“I guess we're going to find out if that's true. As I recall, you told me that when you get to Texas, your savings will only keep you for a while. That could mean any number of things. How much money do you really have on hand?”