Authors: Janice Kay Johnson
After that, a succession of plainclothes and uniformed Angel Butte officers came and went. It seemed there was hardly a moment when one or two weren't sitting near Reid and Anna, letting him know they were there for him. Watching Reid thanking them broke Anna's heart. She could tell he was moved by the support, even as it was killing him to have to answer questions and thank them for coming. She wanted to snatch him away and just hold him.
Twice she left to go upstairs and check on Diego, but both times found him still asleep. Or pretending to be asleepâshe wasn't positive which.
What didn't he want to tell her? Even as she stayed focused on Reid, the question nibbled at the back of her mind. Diego was a runaway, fifteen years old. What could he possibly have to hide?
The answer came to her suddenly, in an
oh duh
moment.
Diego and Caleb hadn't been alone.
Weren't
alone. Diego couldn't send her out to get his stuff because she would have come across another runaway. Even several other runaways.
Had they been close by enough to have heard the sirens and thereby guess why Caleb and Diego hadn't returned? Or were theyâor only one scared boy on his own?âcurrently huddled in the woods somewhere, or maybe in an empty house the group had broken into, wondering what had gone wrong?
Thinking about it, she was seized by pity, but also frustration. Diego's history was a good lesson in why some kids did go on the run. Every single person who could have made a difference had let him down. The brutal parent was only the beginning. From what Reid had said, Caleb was another example. Anna knew full well that too often adults in a position of power in particular evaded any reckoning. Cops were classic, but they weren't alone. She'd had a boy briefly in a receiving home who had been sexually molested for years by his father, a juvenile probation counselor. No one would listen to the boy, even when he attempted suicide twice. Deeply troubled, he was now in a group home. His father had known how to work the system, how to make his kid look like a liar.
Like Reid's father did,
she thought, anger hardening inside her.
It was almost one in the morning when Reid emerged from ICU after having spent ten or fifteen minutes sitting at Caleb's bedside. Anna was the only person left out here. Weariness and despair altered his face into someone less handsome and more human.
He shook his head even before she could ask if there'd been any change. “We both need some sleep. I can come back first thing in the morning.”
Almost as tired as he looked, Anna pushed herself to her feet. “That's a good idea. You need to take care of yourself. Especially if you're going to file for a restraining order in the morning, too.”
“God, yes. If it's possible on a Sunday.” He ran his fingers through his already disheveled hair. “Let's go.”
They walked silently toward the parking lot, Reid escorting Anna to her RAV4. They seemed to be completely alone, their footsteps the only sound. Once at her vehicle, she unlocked the door, then turned to him.
“Do you think you can sleep?”
“I don't know.” He swallowed. “Anna.”
She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his waist, laying her head on his shoulder. “Oh, Reid.”
“Will you come home with me?” The question sounded as if it had been ripped from him.
Surprised, she lifted her head. Before she could respond, he made a ragged sound.
“No. You've got to be beat, too. You've done enough, Anna. I'm sorry.”
“Of course I want to come home with you,” she said almost steadily.
Shadowed from the yellow-tinted sodium lamps, his eyes searched hers. “You mean that.”
“You know I do.”
There was another of those sounds, so uncharacteristic for such a guarded man.
“Do you want to ride with me?”
“I'd better follow you. You'll need to see an attorney first thing tomorrow.”
He frowned, but finally nodded. “Yeah. Okay.”
At this time of night, the drive was short. Thank goodness, his father wasn't parked across the street from Reid's house. That would have been the last straw.
Reid unlocked his front door. The sight of his partially furnished home made her wish she'd suggested they go to her place instead. But then she remembered what he'd said to his father:
Home court, Dad.
Maybe Reid needed his own refuge, however bleak it looked to her.
He'd no sooner closed the door than he turned to her. “You're sure about this?” His voice was hoarse.
Her eyes burned and she reached for him. He came to her fast, yanking her against him, pushing aside her hair to nuzzle her neck. She felt the edges of his teeth, the tautness of his body. The hard ridge that pressed into her belly. With no warning, her own body shot into full arousal. Weariness was forgotten.
“I need you,” he growled, backing her up against the door. “Say no if you're going to.
Now.
”
“Yes,” she whispered and yanked at his suit coat, momentarily trapping his arms.
His kiss seared her. His wall had been dynamited, leaving a desperate man whose hands shook as he tried to strip her. Her parka fell to the floor along with his suit coat. Reid got her blouse partially unbuttoned before giving up. He lifted her and suckled her breast through bra and shirt alike. The sensation was electrifying. She heard herself crying out. Her back arched, pushing her hips against him.
He was talking as he pulled up her skirt and yanked tights and panties down. Anna's brain wouldn't parse what he was saying, only fixated on his voice, the roughened nap of velvet. And his hands, oh God, his hands, still shaking, sliding against her bare skin then squeezing. He had his trousers open when he went completely still.
“No!” she moaned. “Why are you stopping?”
He seemed to be struggling for breath, his eyes dark and intense. “Need to get a condom.”
“I'm on birth control.”
The sound he made then was indescribable. He lifted and spread her in one movement, filling her before she could snatch a breath. The weight of her body pushed him deeper than he'd ever been, making her cry out again. She was helpless in this position. All she could do was hold on and ride the current of his need.
“Now, Anna
.
”
She did hear that, said from between gritted teeth. It wasn't necessary. Her body imploded, and then he thrust hard a couple more times, pulsing inside her.
Anna knew she was sagging in his arms. He leaned against her for a moment, flattening her to the door, and she couldn't have protested if she'd wanted to.
Instead of releasing her, Reid sank to his knees still holding her tight. They leaned against each other, swaying.
“We can't stay here,” he mumbled, sounding drunk.
Anna wanted to topple over. But Reid gently smoothed her skirt down, then staggered to his feet. He adjusted his trousers, zipping them, but not bothering with the button or belt. When he bent and lifted her, she managed to help.
She
felt drunk. Totally done for. Even so, she managed to totter the short distance into his bedroom and stood like a child as he disrobed her. She was totally naked when she crawled into bed and already half-asleep by the time he joined her. She snuggled close, instinctively seeking his warmth, laid her hand over the hard beat of his heart and her head on his shoulder, and dropped off.
* * *
R
EID
HAD
NEVER
felt anything like that before. He'd never slept like that, either, so deeply he wasn't sure he had dreamed.
The idea made him wince. Was Caleb dreaming? Hearing voices? Or was he just...gone? Lost in blackness? Was a coma like death, except the heart continued to beat?
Reid groaned and bent his head under the hot, pounding water from the showerhead. It was the one bit of remodeling he'd bothered with after moving in hereâno low-flow showerhead for him. He needed the closest thing to a massage he could get before he went out the door every morning.
The word echoed in his head.
Needed.
That was what he'd said to Anna.
I need you.
It shook him, how frantic he'd been. How...naked.
And damn if it wasn't the most explosive orgasm of his life. Cause and consequence. Simple.
She could destroy him.
But he kept seeing her face as she sat in that waiting room watching him. The softness and the worry and, God, something else he'd never seen on a woman's face before, not when she was looking at him. Maybe love. Was that possible?
His chest tightened. What was with him, that he kept thinking things like that? Imagining...
Don't,
he told himself harshly. At least...not yet. Get through this first. Protect Caleb from their father while waiting for him to wake upâor not. Keep lying to Anna.
He stumbled over that one.
From a practical standpoint, it was likely the story would unravel. Clay Renner hadn't committed to keeping his mouth shut yet. It might be different if this was a random hit-and-runâsome guy out driving too fast, comes around a bend and takes out a couple of bicyclists, decides in a panic to take off. But Renner, like Roger, had believed TJ, who swore it had been deliberate. The lack of skid marks was compelling, too. And if the driver had been trying to kill or at least maim those boysâhe almost had to be the same person who'd set the fires, slashed the tires, buried a knife blade in the front door of the lodge. Someone with a burning grudge.
Once they caught him, it would all come out.
I have to tell her the truth,
he realized. Not liking it, but not liking any alternative, either. The lies to her, of all people, hadn't sat well with him from the beginning. He remembered thinking that she was the person who came closest to knitting together the parts of his life. The ache when he wanted to talk to her and couldn't.
The risk was huge that she'd turn them all in right away. As he stepped out of the shower and toweled himself dry, Reid mulled over steps he'd take to protect the Renners and Sheriff McAllister. What they'd known and ignored didn't have to be part of the truth he told her.
He hoped she'd cool down before she took action, though. Really listen. She'd understood why Diego had gone off the radar, why Reid had helped his brother escape their father even if he'd done it in a way she didn't entirely approve of.
He stared at himself in the mirror for a moment, but his decision was made. He'd tell her everything. Almost everything. But later. Now he needed to get moving if he intended to have that restraining order in place before his father showed up at the hospital.
With a grunt, Reid reached for his electric shaver.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
A
FTER
DELIVERING
THE
restraining order to the hospital, Reid was allowed into the ICU to sit with Caleb, whose condition had been deemed unchanged.
His brother appeared dead, but for the steady rise and fall of his chest. Cold comfort came from knowing that he was breathing on his own. Some part of his brain was still functioning. It seemed to Reid that the swelling might be going down, although the livid color of the bruises made Caleb look as if he'd been made up for a horror film. Too extensive and vivid for real life, Reid's eye tried to tell him.
A different doctor this morning explained that they were keeping Caleb sedated. They didn't want him to wake up yet. Reid had a vague feeling he'd been told that yesterday. It just hadn't sunk in. So maybe he was being artificially kept from opening his eyes and saying,
Reid! Man, what happened?
Left alone with his brother, Reid took Caleb's hand in his, remembering the comfort of holding hands with Anna last night. Not just physical contactâit had felt more like the hookup between two computers. Signals flying back and forth. Maybe, wherever Caleb was lost, he'd feel the same kind of connection.
“Dad can't get to you here. I got a restraining order,” Reid said, his voice sounding unnaturally loud. He cleared his throat. “No problem. That doesn't necessarily mean clear sailing from here on out, but the judge was sympathetic. It was a woman, pretty new on the bench, I'm told. I went in with my dental records and I got yours emailed first thing this morning. Lucky you'd told me where he took you to get that bridge. She said the number of dentists he took me to over the years was a red flag that should have been noted when I was a kid.” He paused, watching for a twitch of reaction.
Nada.
“Dad hasn't showed his face yet. I think I shook him up yesterday. I...really thought it might have been him who'd run you down, but it doesn't look like it was.” His voice gained urgency. “I sure as hell wish you'd wake up and tell us what you saw.”
He rambled for a few more minutes. He didn't talk about Anna, although he wanted to. Figuring out what to say was too tricky. Not when part of his turmoil concerned sex.
Making love.
The sight of her still sleeping in his bed before he left this morning had stirred him in unaccustomed ways. He'd had the fleeting vision of waking up with her every morning. The idea didn't scare him as much as it should.
He did tell his brother that he had to go out to the Hales' because TJ wanted to talk to him. “I'm meeting Sergeant Renner there, too. No way around it. It's his investigation. Uh...I told you about him last night. So far, he seems okay. I guess I'm not surprised, since he's married to Jane Renner, who works for me, and she's good.”
He squeezed Caleb's hand. “I'll be back in a couple of hours at the most. Later today, the doctors are going to start tapering off on the sedatives. Your head will feel a lot clearer. In the meantimeâ” God, he sounded like an idiot “âyou just rest, okay?”
Was he imagining the tiny flexing of those too-chilly fingers? Yeah, he decided, staring down at them, he must be. Reid hesitated, then lightly touched the less-damaged side of Caleb's face. “I'll be back,” he repeated and strode out.
* * *
I
T
WAS
DISORIENTING
to wake up in someone else's bed. Anna lay still for a minute, until she remembered where she was. Then she opened her eyes and turned her head to see she was alone. The small house was quiet. So he was goneâ Then her gaze fell on the clock and she squeaked. 10:54? No wonder Reid was long gone!
She leaped for the bathroom, where she found a note laid on the closed seat of the toilet, hard to miss.
Hope you didn't have to be anywhere early. I figured you needed the sleep. I'll see you at the hospital.
Signed,
Reid.
Not that she'd expected any
Love, Reid,
but...
She huffed. Sure. Dream on.
After a shower, she ate a quick bowl of cereal and left, using the push-button lock, but unable to turn the dead bolt without a key. Somehow, she kind of doubted today was the day someone would break into Reid Sawyer's rental house and steal...what? There weren't a lot of goodies on display.
At the hospital, she spotted a strongly built, very dark-skinned Hispanic man near the nurses' station on Diego's floor. Even from a distance, his fury was obvious. Wonderful. He'd been told he wouldn't be allowed to see his son. Talking to him was a peachy way to start the day.
Fortunately, his anger already had a target: the DHS caseworker, who cast Anna a grateful glance when she joined them. They took him into a small conference room, where they explained that given the allegations of abuse, they had requested a dependency hearing. In the meantime, his son had asked for no contact.
Hector leaped to his feet with a roar. “You know nothing!
Women.
” He spat it like an epithet. “Don't think you'll keep my son from me.”
The painfully young DHS caseworker shrank back from him, an enraged male standing above the two women with his fists balled. “You'll receive a fair hearing....”
“And this time, so will Diego,” Anna was unwise enough to say.
Snarling, he picked up a chair. She saw in his eyes how much he wanted to swing it at her. Cave in her head. Smash her. She sat frozen, instinct telling her not to stand up, not to move at all. That same instinct said,
He's fooled half a dozen caseworkers and as many family court judges. If he lacked all impulse control, he wouldn't have managed that.
She was right. His eyes never leaving hers, he set down the chair and walked out of the small room. The caseworker was shaking, and Anna was disturbed to realize she was, too.
After that, she went in to talk to Diego, who, sitting up in bed with the TV on, was undeniably awake. He looked wary. “Miss Grant.”
“Yep, I'm back. I just met with your father.”
The wariness became fear. “He's
here?
” He looked past her at the door. “I can't stay. I can't.” He shoved the tray table aside and struggled as if he thought he could swing the heavy cast over the edge of the bed and leap to his feet. “I won't go back with him. I'll kill myself first!”
“Diego.” She laid a hand on his arm. “He can't come in here. We've filed a court order preventing him until the allegations you've made can be investigated. The nurses and doctors are aware of what's going on. They won't let him get to you. I promise.”
His face contorted and he bent his head, trying to hide tears from her, but his shoulders heaved with a sob. Anna sat on the edge of the bed and wrapped her arms around him. He cried against her, in that raw, unpracticed way of boys and men. When he finally pulled away, she saw his shame. In his eyes, he hadn't been manly.
Without a word, Anna handed him a box of tissues and he wiped his face and blew his nose.
“You know what?” she said. “I need a Pepsi or Coke. How about you? Would you like a soda?”
He sneaked a look at her face. “Can I?”
“Sure you can. What do you want?”
She had to go all the way down to the cafeteria to secure two tall bottles of Pepsi, chilly and beaded with moisture. The look on his face when she handed one over was her reward.
She bided her time, letting him gulp a quarter of it down and sipping her own before she said, “We need to talk, Diego.”
His alarm flared again. “I told that other social worker everything.”
Anna nodded. “I know you did. She's going to request medical records and call everyone whose names you gave. I'm more interested in, oh, getting to know you so I can put you in the right foster home if it comes to that.” She paused, watching his guard lower before adding, “I need to know more about your recent history. There's a whole lot you aren't telling me, isn't there, Diego?” she said gently.
He was tough, but also only fifteen years old. Anna's experience trumped his stubbornness. Even so, she didn't get everything, but he did admit enough to make apprehension, anger and a sense of betrayal tangle in her until she could hardly draw breath.
Reid had lied to her. He must have. Unless his
dear
friends had also taken in Caleb and probably other boys, too. None of whom could have been court supervised, or said caseworker would have noticed the boys who
weren't
on her list of foster children who belonged in the home.
“You've already met Caleb's brother, Reid, haven't you?” she said casually.
Diego's mouth opened and then closed. His eyes were dark and worried. He didn't have a face meant to keep secrets.
Anna laid her hand on his arm and squeezed. “It's okay, Diego. I know you're trying not to get anyone else in trouble, and I understand. We'll leave it there for now, okay?”
He gave a jerky nod. “What if my dad sneaks in?”
“Scream.” She let him see that she meant it. “Raise a ruckus. Help will come. I promise.”
Diego's head bobbed. “Okay.”
She was almost to the door when, behind her, he said, “Thank you.”
Anna turned in surprise. The look on his young face was heartbreaking.
“I mean, for believing me.”
She swallowed a lump in her throat before she could get out a word. “I do believe you, Diego. So did Ms. Hinton. We're on your side.”
She almost said,
To the death,
but didn't, because that would sound bad and send the wrong message. She didn't even exactly mean it. There were legal avenues to save this boy, and she believed in those, heart and soul. She of all people knew what came of not following the guidelines.
Then, feeling sickâno, worse than that,
grieving
âshe headed for the elevator that would take her down to the ground floor and ICU.
* * *
D
URING
R
EID
'
S
VISITS
to the Hales', TJ had remained a closed book to him. His looks alone were daunting to the other boys, who noticeably kept their distance.
Although barely seventeen, TJ looked to be in his twenties. He topped six feet, and unlike the other boys, had already developed a man's muscles, long and ropy. A man's growth of beard, too. The stubble was paired with shaggy dark hair that often hung over his equally dark eyes and hid his expression. Reid had never seen the kid look anything but sullen. From what Paula and Roger had said, his attitude was lousy. And yet, he'd stayed.
After reviewing his records, Reid could see why. Theodore James Haveman's father didn't just have anger-management problems. He held grudges and possessed a mile-wide streak of cruelty. He harbored a hell of a lot of anger, but didn't necessarily lash out the way your garden-variety abusive parent did. No, this guy would bide his time, let his kid think he'd gotten away with something or that an offense had been forgotten, and then he'd punish him viciously. Even creatively. Unfortunately, he was smart enough to do it in ways that didn't show on the surface. Bruises and scars might tell a story. Electrical shocks didn't. Killing the family's pet didn't. Hurting Mom to punish the kid, that didn't, either. Apparently, he could count on his wife to keep her mouth shut.
Reid hated this guy. He despised him. Unfortunately, Reid was left wondering how sane the son could be after a lifetime of such treatment. There was no way he'd been behind the wheel of that pickup truck, but he still could be the arsonist who was also fond of knives.
Renner had said TJ seemed genuinely distraught over the hit-and-run. The kid was seriously shaken, and no wonder. Riding along the shoulder of the road, TJ had had a bull's-eye on his back, escaping only because of sharp ears and quick reflexes.
Reid grimaced as he got out of his Expedition in front of the lodge. TJ had probably had a hell of a lot of practice in evading pain. He'd learned to trust instincts he should never have had to acquire.
A dark green Jeep Cherokee was already parked in front. Was somebody else here, or had Renner driven his own vehicle?
Reid took the steps two at a time and went in without knocking. Four heads turned. Clay Renner, Paula, Roger and TJ were seated on benches on each side of one of the long tables rather than in the more comfortable living room setup around the river-rock fireplace. No fire burned in it today. The weather had actually turned a corner, and the day almost felt like spring. Memories of the winters he'd spent in Angel Butte made Reid suspect the almost-balmy day was only a trick to make them think winter had released its grip.
No sounds came from the kitchen. The other boys were absent, probably huddled in their cabins.
At the sight of him, Roger swung a leg over the bench. “Coffee?”
He flapped a hand. “Don't get up.”
Nobody else wanted a refill when he offered. When he returned, he chose to sit right across from TJ.
“Any update on Caleb?” Paula asked anxiously.
Reid told them what the doctor had said about keeping Caleb sedated. “We'll see once they taper him off.” He raised his eyebrows, his gaze on TJ. “All right. What's this about?”
“Can't I talk to you alone?” The boy had a man's voice, too, deep and even gruff.
Renner didn't look happy, but didn't raise an objection.
Reid took his time thinking how to answer. “TJ, unless this is unrelated to the safety of everyone here at the lodge, I don't see how we can keep what you have to say from Paula and Roger. And if it has to do with the hit-and-runâ” He stopped as soon as he saw from the boy's expression that it did. “I think you'd better just come clean.”
TJ slid a glance at Paula, took a deep breath and nodded. “Everything happening... You know. The fires and shit. Stuff,” he corrected himself. His Adam's apple bobbed hard. “I think it's my dad.”