Harvest of Gold (14 page)

She felt better the longer she considered it. But she knew that Darius would never agree. He would not listen to reason. He would force her to stay at home, where she would be safe, surrounded by friends and court physicians. No amount of cajoling, convincing, crying, or wheedling would move him.

Sarah began to pace around her apartment. Her puppy, Anousya, kept pace with her. He skipped by her side backward and forward, occasionally making plaintive sounds, as though wondering what ailed his mistress. Absently she bent down to pet him before resuming her agitated walk.

She needed a physician, first to confirm that she was indeed expecting a baby, and second to ascertain if travel to Judah would be safe for her and the child. Where could she find a competent physician who would not betray her secret to her husband? For if she were to go to Jerusalem, her only option would be to keep her pregnancy a secret from Darius until they were too far from Susa for him to send her back.

She had given him her word to be forthright and honest, to keep nothing hidden from him. Was it wise to risk their relationship by withholding this secret?

The alternative would be to part from him for endless months. She would not be lying. She would just be delaying telling her husband the truth.

The thought brought on another wave of nausea. Sarah tried to breathe deeply, calming herself. Darius would interpret her actions as a betrayal. He would be furious. He had once told her that he could not abide lies. The mere suspicion that she had lied to him at the start of their marriage had kept him apart from her for months. She could not risk her marriage by hiding her pregnancy from him. But neither could she face the prospect of living without him for a year and bringing their baby into the world in his absence.

With a frantic motion she doubled over into the basin and retched, even though there was nothing left in her stomach to bring up. She curled up on her bed, exhausted and sick. And still no solution presented itself.

“From the king, for you,” Darius said as he dropped a black box on the bed next to her. Sarah picked the box up in surprise.

“For me?”

“In appreciation for your part in discovering the murder plot.”

Sarah, whose stomach had thankfully settled down for the past few hours, felt well enough to enjoy the gift. She pulled out the carnelian necklace and examined it with care. “It’s breathtaking.” She held it against her throat for a moment before dropping it back in its box. “I will write the king a letter of thanks. And I will not mention the fact that the queen’s gift is exceedingly more to my taste than His Majesty’s.”

Darius sat on the bed next to her, stretching his legs to the floor. “Am I expected to feel flattered at being considered more worthy than a bauble?”

Sarah had been rewarded with an aristocratic marriage to Darius after solving a potentially damaging plot against Damaspia. She blew a kiss to her husband and nodded. “Baubles are very appealing, my lord. They often appreciate in value and come in handy during times of economic distress. Besides, they are never moody or unreasonable.”

“Unlike husbands, you mean?” With a sudden shifting of long limbs, Darius pushed Sarah back into the pillows for a deep kiss that melted her insides. “But can they do this?” he asked.

“I told you I preferred the queen’s gift.”

He turned a half revolution from her so that he lay on his side next to her. “Pari tells me you’ve been sick all day. It’s not the first time you have felt unwell in the past week or two. It should have passed by now if it were a simple stomach sickness.” His hand felt cool against Sarah’s heated cheek. “You feel warm.”

She shook her head and shifted on the bed, looking for a more comfortable position. “I’m not feverish.” Until today, she had managed to downplay her sickness and exhaustion around Darius. It was impossible to do so anymore, given the increased frequency and violence of how wretched she felt.

He stroked her hair with a gentle hand. “Perhaps not. But I am sending for a physician nonetheless. I don’t like this lingering malaise.”

Guilt churned Sarah’s insides. She still had not decided on a course of action. He would be elated to know that he was about to become a father. Her heart melted as she imagined his face when she told him the news. She almost blurted it out then. She stifled the desire, because she knew that telling him was the same as engineering their separation. With difficulty she forced herself to keep her secret for a while longer.

“So what did the king want to see you about? Any news?”

Darius leaned back, resting his elbow on the covers. “He wants to send me to Jerusalem with your cousin Nehemiah.”

From his hesitant manner, Sarah deduced that he expected her to be shocked by his news. “So Nehemiah tells me.”

“You have spoken to the cupbearer?” Darius’s frown was thunderous.

“He sent me a letter, describing his upcoming journey. He said you would be leading his military escort and asked if I would be willing to help. Competent scribes are not easy to come by in Jerusalem, it seems.”

Darius swiveled to sit up. “He reaches above himself! He assumes he has the authority to command you to travel to Jerusalem?”

Sarah’s eyes widened. “Command me? Of course not. He believed you would be taking me with you. You know I have always wanted to visit Jerusalem. Besides, you would be gone for a year. You wouldn’t leave me behind for that length of time. His letter intended no disrespect. He said that since I was already coming on the journey, I could be of tremendous help as a scribe.”

Two spots of bright color burned on Darius’s cheeks. He shifted on the bed as if he could not find a comfortable position.

Sarah’s mouth fell open. “I
am
coming, aren’t I? You don’t intend to leave me behind?”

“It’s too dangerous, Sarah.” Darius avoided looking at her. “Going as Nehemiah’s escort is a mere cover. My real mission is to get to the root of this plot while we are in the Trans-Euphrates. If the assassin begins to suspect me as the king’s agent, you would be in danger. They could take you hostage to get to me.

“In any case, according to reports from area officials, your beloved Jerusalem has become a cauldron of unrest. Hostile nations surround the city. They will be none too pleased by Judah’s sudden favor with the king. Who knows what they might do. It’s too risky to take you along.”

Sarah sat up straight. He planned to leave her behind! Was it so easy for him to abandon her for a whole year? Here she had been agonizing over how not to be parted from him, and he had already decided that he would leave her at home. All considerations of telling him about the baby vanished. “You seem eager to be parted from me.” Her lips felt stiff as she spoke.

Darius shot up and stood over her like a tall column of fury. “Don’t be dim-witted, Sarah. I hate the thought of leaving you. But I won’t endanger your life for the sake of my own selfish desires. As I’ve already told the king, your presence would prove a dangerous distraction.”

“The king? Artaxerxes told you to take me with you?”

An elegant hand waved in the air. “He made a mere suggestion.”

“So even the king agrees with me.”

“The king is interested in your usefulness. He knows your talents would serve him well on this trip. He is looking out for the interests of the empire. I am looking out for you.”

“Darius, you can’t protect me from every danger. The last time my life was threatened, I was safely ensconced in your mansion. And it wasn’t some bloodthirsty enemy of the empire that stabbed me in the woods of Ecbatana. Your own servant did that.” Sarah forced herself to be calm. Her voice grew soft and pleading. “I am safest when I am with you. Please take me.”

Darius raked his fingers through his long hair. “I will think on it.”

The physician Darius summoned to Sarah’s bedside proved too competent. A lanky Egyptian with a smoothly shaven face that betrayed little emotion, he wasted no time and examined Sarah with thorough expertise. As he washed his hands in a basin of warm water, he said, “No malady ails you, my lady. I believe you are with child, although it’s early days. Two months, perhaps. You must have guessed?”

Sarah flushed. “I suspected it.”

“Judging by what your husband said, he is unaware of your condition. He fears you are ill.”

“I haven’t told him yet. I wanted to be certain.”

“You can be certain. A baby grows in your womb.”

A rush of joy swept over Sarah so that she could not speak for some time. In that short moment, the physician’s pronouncement made the baby real to her—real enough to love. To protect. She closed her eyes. She was carrying Darius’s child. Her eyes grew moist as an avalanche of tangled feelings gathered force in her heart.
She was going to be a mother!

Her mind was finally able to think beyond the emotions of the moment. “Can I travel? Will it endanger the baby?”

“Not if you take care. No galloping on horseback, mind. If you go at a gentle pace and take plenty of rest, you should both be fine.”

He then gave her a list of foods to eat and to avoid. Sarah took the list and studied it with care, memorizing it on the spot.

“I have a favor to ask of you, master physician. Don’t inform my husband of my pregnancy yet.”

The smooth mask of the Egyptian’s face remained impassive. “I don’t mean to be disobliging, my lady, but to withhold such information from the man who hired me would be wrong. I would not betray his lordship’s trust, nor would I invite his justified affront.”

“I had no right to ask. Forgive me.”

“Why do you wish to withhold such happy news from your husband? It is clear that you are delighted with the child. Your husband will be equally thrilled, I assure you.”

Sarah plucked at the soft sheets. “He will be leaving on a long assignment shortly. As it is, he does not want to take me along due to the possible dangers we might encounter. Once he knows I am with child, he will tie me up to a wooden post rather than risk taking me with him.”

“I see. When I inform him of your condition, I will try to reassure him that travel poses no threat to the health of your baby.”

“My thanks,” Sarah said. “Not that it will make any difference.”

Darius was beginning to understand why Artaxerxes had given him such a pitying look on their last meeting. The king had once allowed his own wife and queen to accompany him on a military campaign. Darius began to suspect that bringing Damaspia along on that occasion had not been Artaxerxes’ original intention. Damaspia must have forced his hand. He could just see her, the dazzling cerulean blue eyes flooding with fat tears, begging her husband to allow her to go. He realized he was no more immune to Sarah’s soft plea than Artaxerxes had been to Damaspia.
I am safest when I am with you
. Those words had wormed their way into his heart. He could not deny the impact they had on him. The woman knew how to get under his skin.

He had spent the afternoon away from home, overseeing details of his trip to Beyond the River. Impressed by how much the cupbearer had already accomplished in a short time, Darius had to admit that his wife’s cousin had a genius for administration.