Authors: Angel Rose
“We didn’t know she had family in Pennsylvania, and not too far from where Jen grew up.” Dave said nervously. “What difference does it make, Michael, you know I can find anybody, I’m a detective. I’m sorry I didn’t wait, I really had to get things done.” Dave slid his hands through his hair. The conversation was making him uncomfortable and he looked like he wanted to run. Dave looked into the car at me. I took a deep breath before walking out to approach him.
“Jen, I’m sorry. I’m sure you overheard our conversation. Margaret loved you and that’s all you really need to remember.” he said as I stood in front of him.
“I’m sorry, is that all you really have to say to me. She was like
my
mother. I loved her. How could you do that to me?” I shook my head. “Dave, you hated Margaret for cheating on you with Carl, and you punished her by not letting me see her before you cremated her. Why would you do that?” I shouted at him.
“What? What the hell are you talking about? I tried making things easy for you, I did everything so
you
could move on. I did it for you!” he roared in my face.
“Dave, did you hurt her? I saw the clothes in the hamper, Dave. I saw it!” I shouted as I choked back my tears.
“Are you crazy? What clothes? What are you talking about?” He said angrily, his gaze dark and cold.
“No, no I’m not, and you know it!” the tears trundled down my face.
“You’re wrong about me Jen. I would never hurt Margaret. How could you think such a thing about me?” He grabbed me by the arm and stared into my eyes. “I’ve been there for you. The
only
one who’s been there for you before Margaret, before Michael, and this is how you repay me? By accusing me of hurting Margaret?” His voice was low…
he was hurt.
“No…I just...” I stepped back.
“You. Just. What?” he said angrily. “By the way, you’re not perfect, either. I know you were going to spill a little blood yourself. On a Friday, at 8:00AM… sound familiar?” He said vindictively. My heart sunk to the floor and I almost threw up in my mouth. “I have to go.” He looked at me intensely with the look of the devil himself then he walked away.
I almost died
. I felt so abandoned by him. I felt so betrayed. I immediately began to panic. My heart was racing and the blood rushed to my face making it red with anger.
How the hell did he know I planned to have an abortion? Did Margaret tell him?
She was sworn to secrecy to never tell.
“Dave!” Michael shouted.
“Jenesis, what the hell was that all about? What clothes? Friday?” I turned to Michael and took a deep breath.
“Never mind… let him go.” I shook my head and leaned against the car.
“What were you talking about? What was in the hamper? What happened on Friday at 8:00 AM?” Michael’s face was exacerbated with anger and suspicion.
“It doesn’t matter now does it? She’s dead.” I wiped my tears with the back of my hand.
“Yeah, but he was talking about
you?
” He opened the car door for me.
“Whatever.” I sat down on the passenger side. I was still sweating thinking about what Dave said. Every fiber in my body was quivering.
“You know what? Never mind, just take it easy, and let’s go home.” He said as he opened the car door. He practically threw himself in his seat, slamming his hand on the steering wheel as he slammed the door shut.
“Where’s that?” I replied sarcastically.
Michael gave me a twisted look. We didn’t say a word to each other as we drove back to the hotel. I looked out of the window and watched the sunset along the long winding road we drove on. It was a windy night and the trees swayed in a wicked fashion to the rhythm of the wind.
Dave’s words haunted me and I was cursing Margaret in my mind.
Why did Dave do it? Why did he say that to me?
I just couldn’t believe Dave knew. I sat and looked over at Michael to see if he could see right through me. It’s bad enough Dave cremated Margaret like that without letting me see her. It seemed like such an evil deed to do.
He knew I loved her like a mother, why would he do that to me?
Now, I’m sitting here questioning my own love for her.
I’m disgusting
. All of these things were just running through my mind. I just kept thinking about that guy in the ski mask, Margaret and that blood stained blouse and jeans, Dave and his strange behavior.
How this was all connected? Did that guy kill Margaret? Did he kill her before she left the house to pick me up? Did Carl kill her? Did Carl try to kill me?
I just didn’t know. It was all too much. I just closed my eyes and cried all the way home. Michael placed his hand on my lap. I held his hand, looked up at him, and smiled. Then he jerked his hand away from me, and I felt his hate…
his hate…not his love.
***
We finally arrived at the hotel. Michael was really upset with me. He looked over at me.
“Jen, I know this is all so confusing. I don’t care what Dave said about you. Whatever it is, I know he’s lying. He doesn’t want us to be together. He never did.” I kept looking out of the window. “We don’t ever have to see Dave again. Remember our plan? We’re starting over. Just you and me. Don’t worry anymore, okay?” he held my hand and kissed my knuckles gently. I pulled my hand away, then I grabbed him by his arm and said,
“I’m ready to start over and I don’t want to feel this way anymore; all I want is for us to be okay, to be happy. Our lives are out of control Michael. I can’t find peace…we need to get it together.” I said frantically. He looked at me then nodded his head.
“I know, I know.” We parked in the lot of the hotel and then walked hand in hand towards the entrance.
There was a wedding being held in the main hall of the hotel. There were so many people outside in front of the hotel it was like a mad house. We pushed through the people and walked pass the bride. She seemed to be enjoying her wedding day. She was a beautiful woman with long, straight black hair. Her blue eyes glistened in the dark with only the reflection of the moon shining in her eyes. She fixed her white beaded veil as it blew in the wind. At one point, she seemed to be staggering and holding her dress up so she wouldn’t trip over it. I couldn’t help but stare. She seemed to have recognized someone in the crowd and her eyebrows furrowed as she got closer to us. She stopped in front of us and looked up at Michael with her exotic deep blue eyes. Her mascara was running down her face a little, she was giggling and she seemed drunk. Then she said,
“Michael?”
“Dina?” he answered as he stopped in front of her.
“Michael, Oh my God! What are you doing here?” She took a step back in shock.
“I’m staying here.” he replied squeezing my hand tightly.
“Michael, all of these years I thought about you and wondered where you were and why you left me so suddenly.” she said angrily holding on to his shoulders.
“This isn’t the right time to talk about this, this is your wedding day, and you should be with your husband.” Michael said as he grabbed her hands and pried them off of his shoulders. He then turned and started to walk away. She looked at him then at me and said, “And you are?”
“His wife, Jenesis, congratulations.” I extended my hand to her and she turned her back on me.
“Michael, your wife?” she laughed sarcastically.
“Dina, it was nice seeing you, and again, congratulations.” Michael said calmly as he grabbed my hand to walk away.
“Michael! Michael! Don’t’ you walk away from me like you did 12 years ago, you son of a bitch! Michael! Michael!” she yelled. She looked at me and ran in front of me blocking me from walking away and pulling my hand away from his.
“Don’t you worry? He’ll do what he did to me! Do you know his father? He’s a creep! An animal! A pervert! His father wanted me you know, and I gave it to him! That’s right, Michael! I gave it to him and he was great! He was better than you!” she yelled.
Michael continued to walk hurriedly and left me behind. My face was heated with embarrassment, but what I really wanted to do was punch her in her face.
The groom came up behind her, grabbed his bride, and put his hand over her mouth, dragging her towards the limo. She was crying and screaming like a raving lunatic and making a scene, flailing her arms in the air and kicking her husband. She kept yelling Michael’s name. He finally grabbed her by her arms and threw her into the limo.
“Come on!” Michael shouted as he turned around and grabbed me by the arm. We went into the elevator as all of the wedding guests stood staring at us.
“What the hell is going on?” I shouted. He didn’t answer me.
We got to the hotel room and Michael opened the door.
“I know you want to know what that was all about.” he whispered softly.
“Really? Speak up Michael, I can’t hear you!” I barked.
“Look, she was a filthy whore that I got mixed up with. My father had to get involved.” he said angrily.
“Michael, I don’t want to know your past ex-girlfriends, even though you told me you weren’t seriously involved with anyone before me. This is not my concern.” I said. Then I thought for a moment and said, “Wait, I thought your father left you and your mother when you were three?”
“No, she meant my stepfather.” he said hesitantly.
“Your mother remarried? I thought she died. You can’t even get your fucking story straight! He’s a pervert! She slept with your stepfather, what the hell Michael? All in the family!” I yelled.
“What story? Just forget about that bitch! She deserved everything she got and more!” he yelled as he slid his hands through his hair, then picked up the champagne bottle, throwing it against the wall. I took a step back. He was enraged.
“You know what, Michael, I don’t care. I don’t care about anything anymore. Just leave me the fuck alone.” I said harshly. I sat on the couch near the window. Michael looked over at me.
“Look, just forget it. None of this is worth fighting over. That relationship was a long time ago. A long time ago, I was a kid. It meant nothing.” he said softly as he looked out of the window.
“Relationship? I thought you said you fuck them and leave them? Now, it’s a relationship. She called your father a pervert. Do you know how sick that sounds? She slept with him? Try and make me understand…please…I’m waiting.” Michael shrugged his shoulders at me and shook his head. I looked at him with disgust and walked towards the balcony. He walked towards the bathroom pulling off his shirt.
“I’m taking a shower. Do you want to join me?” he said as he grabbed my hand. I slid his hand away from mine.
“Go to hell!” I walked away from him and walked towards the kitchen.
“Whatever!” he said angrily and slammed the bathroom door so hard the floor shook.
The night was long and silent. I did nothing but think about my babies,
constantly.
I couldn’t believe I miscarried again. Maybe I just wasn’t strong enough to hold them both or I was just too stressed out. I glanced into the living room as Michael prepared to sleep on the couch, covering the couch with a blanket and propping pillows at the corner so he could lie down and go to sleep. I slipped by him to avoid the same game of arguing then making up. I was drained emotionally and I didn’t want to give him a chance to say he was sorry about anything. I didn’t want to hear sorry anymore. I wanted to lie in this cold bed and cry myself to sleep. I couldn’t call anyone to talk about how I felt. My mother was dead, my best friend Vivian was dead, Margaret was dead and now, I was running away from Dave, the only father I’ve known.
I know I didn’t make a big deal about Michael and that woman, but I really wanted to.
Who was she?
How involved was he with her?
I didn’t understand why she was so angry and emotional. I didn’t want to keep asking him about her. I just kept thinking about what she said about his father. She didn’t say stepfather, she said
father.
I really couldn’t take much more of anything. It seemed like everywhere we went there was a problem or someone was getting hurt, or worse…dying. I just wanted to forget about everything and everyone.
I tried to sleep but I just couldn’t. It was a horrible sleepless night with images of caskets, white orchids, cars crashing and dead bodies, angels, devils, me…underneath my mother’s bed. There weren’t enough sheep in the world that I could count to make me close my eyes and go to sleep. The nightmares never ended.
They. Just. Never. Ended.
CHAPTER 9
Three weeks had past and we were still staying at the hotel looking for a place to live. We finally found a house we were interested in. It was a four-bedroom home on an acre of land nestled in the woods. We were surrounded by trees, and we even had a running stream in the back of the house. There was a beautiful, fenced backyard large enough for a pool. The basement was fully finished and it even had a wet bar. We hadn’t spoken to Dave since the day of the argument and neither of us really cared. We were worry free and hadn’t mentioned Dina, or Dave. We didn’t even hear from Tilly and Eddie, which was strange because we were all such good friends. Maybe they were mad at us because we didn’t attend their wedding in England. But I could care less. I was tired. Tired of the drama and tired of being tired.