Heart's Design: A Contemporary Christian Romance (20 page)

“Caroline, I believe I owe you an apology.” Beverly wiped her mouth with her napkin and lowered her gaze.

Caroline paused with her fork above her plate. Why on earth would this kindly woman feel the need to apologize?

“I knew Seth had issues with a lawyer in Boston because of his dad’s trial, but he’d never told me the man’s name until the day of Liesel and Paul’s wedding. Then, when you and I talked here in the kitchen that same morning—and you gave me the name of your father’s law firm—I knew.”

Caroline leaned closer. Liesel leaned closer. “Knew
what
exactly?” Caroline said.

“Without a doubt, the good Lord’s had His hand in this whole situation. He brought you here to Evergreen. He brought Seth here at the same time. Both for your own reasons but also so that He could accomplish His will in your lives. Right after you and your friends left town on that Sunday morning, I assumed Seth had figured out the connection. Then when I told Seth I was proud of him, and then when he asked me your last name, he dropped a mug on my hardwood floor and looked like a truck was about to run him down.”

“You don’t need to apologize for that,” Caroline said, and she meant her words. Beverly was so caring and well-intentioned that she could never fault her. “You spoke the truth and Seth needed to hear it. Then there’s the whole thing about the letter.”

“Letter? What letter?” Beverly took another bite of her quiche.

After she filled her in, Caroline added, “I know in my heart that Mother took it for whatever reason. How else would she have known Seth’s name? I’m wondering if she put two and two together about Seth’s dad, the trial, the whole thing.”

“You think she’d do that?” Liesel asked. “Actually take the letter, I mean? Sorry to say but that’s stealing.”

“I think she’s capable of it.” Caroline shrugged. “Seth didn’t tell me what was in the letter, but after the Old Speck Disaster, I have a pretty good idea. At this point, it’s probably best that I don’t know.” She finished her salad and put down her fork. “I want to help Seth, but other than pray, I don’t know how. We’ve both changed since we first met. I suppose we were naïve dreamers to think something could ever happen with us. Now, reality’s set in and he’s with Jenica.”

“Seth cared enough to steer you in the direction of the Savior,” Beverly said, her voice soft. “He didn’t know your background or know your father was Duncan Prescott. His faith is strong, but his anger at your dad is his own personal cross to bear. The Lord knows we all have them. But Seth cared about your
soul
, honey. Remember that. Maybe now it’s your
turn to help him
find
his
way. I think perhaps you’re the best person to help that young man heal.”

“Why? I mean, how?” Caroline shook her head, confused. “I pretty much told him to have a nice life and slammed the door for anything happening between us in the future.”

“I’ll take a stab at answering the
why
part of your question,” Liesel said. “Because you love your father, and you also love Seth, even if you won’t admit it.”

“I…” Caroline faltered.

“You do love him or this wouldn’t affect you so much,” Liesel insisted, taking another bite of her fruit. “And I’m not just talking as a friend. The sparks between you two were flying around our wedding reception so fast that I alerted Fire Chief O’Malley to have the extinguisher handy.”

Caroline looked into the eyes of first Liesel and then Beverly. “
How
can I help him heal?”

Beverly smiled. “Just love him, honey. And keep praying for him. If we allow hate to consume us, it can devour us from the inside out. Hate is a strong emotion, but love is that much
more
powerful. Jesus is the giver of love, the healer of relationships, and the Great Redeemer. The One who shows us how to forgive. We’ll pray Seth will open his heart and listen to what the Lord’s telling him in terms of forgiving your father.”

“Even after all these years?” In her world, at least as she’d known it before, grudges were held long and rarely forgotten much less forgiven.

Liesel kissed her mother’s cheek. “Let me try to put it in layman’s terms for you. What my sweet mother is saying is that we need to pray the Lord will knock some sense into that man because right now he’s got rocks for brains.”

Beverly shook her head. “You’re putting words in my mouth again, daughter. For now, Caroline, love Seth as a
friend
. God knows all about your feelings. And He knows Seth’s heart better than anyone. Leave it in His more than capable hands to work it out in His own way, in His own perfect time.”

~~♥~~

That Same Night—Oxford Hills, Maine

Seth stood outside Jenica’s parents’ house. This is the part he hated about dating. Breaking up with someone was difficult no matter the circumstances. Staying in a relationship with Jenica when he was in love with Caroline wasn’t being fair to any of them. At first, he’d thought he was falling in love, but he was already there. He knew the beautiful blonde jewelry designer couldn’t be happy with him. He wasn’t happy with himself. But he’d prayed about it and he was making strides in the right direction. Whether or not anything developed with Caroline—and he hoped she might see fit to allow him back into her life—he needed to do this. Just as he’d told Caroline the truth, now he had to be honest with Jenica. Time to take the first step toward Caroline and hopefully winning her heart.

The door opened and Jenica gave him her best smile although it looked somewhat shaky. “I’m glad you called. Come on in.” After closing the door behind him, she waved her hand toward the sofa. “Have a seat. Are you hungry? Mom made a good stew and dumplings tonight. Good to help ward off the night chill.”

“No, thanks. I’m not hungry. Come sit beside me, Jen. We need to talk.”

Her blue eyes grew rounder. “Okay. Should I be scared?”

Lord, be with me.

“You don’t need to be scared, but I think you and I both know our relationship isn’t…moving forward.”

Jenica twisted her hands in her lap. “You’re breaking up with me, aren’t you?” No tears, no anger, just a sad acceptance. “I was afraid this was coming. This has something to do with Caroline, doesn’t it?”

Stunned, Seth couldn’t answer right away. Had he been that obvious? “Why do you ask?”

She blew out a breath. “I’ve heard the talk, you know. How you couldn’t stop watching her at the wedding reception. Sat with her in the swing at Landon’s that night over two years ago. You don’t know how many times I’ve kicked myself for not being at that wedding—”

“I hope you’ll believe me when I tell you that I didn’t expect to feel anything for Caroline. Both then and now.”

“So you
do
care for her?”

Seth met her gaze. She deserved straightforward honesty. “I do. But, up until this point, nothing’s happened between us that shouldn’t have.” For whatever reason, it was important to him that Jenica hear the truth directly from him.

Jenica rolled her eyes and threw her hands in the air. “Are you
kidding
me?” Rising to her feet, she paced in front of him. “I’m sure you’re thinking that because you haven’t kissed her, then”—she curled two fingers on each hand to represent quotation marks—“nothing’s happened. But you’re wrong. Something
has
happened between the two of you or you wouldn’t be here now breaking it off between us. You haven’t been the same since you came back from California and discovered that Caroline lived here in Evergreen. I suppose I was naïve to believe we could just resume our relationship.”

“No, you weren’t wrong to think that way.” Dating Jenica before he left Maine, keeping in touch while he was in California, and then moving back—through it all, he’d never dated anyone else. But it wasn’t so much wanting to be exclusive with Jenica as it was…safe. Comfortable. Easy. That way, he could say he was in a relationship, go about his work, and he’d been content with his life. Until now when Caroline Prescott walked back into this life.

Jenica stopped pacing and stared at him, suspicion glimmering in her blue eyes. “Did Caroline move to Maine in order to be closer to you?”

“No, of course not.” Besides the fact that Caroline told him so, he understood the lure of the mountains and the small town charm of Evergreen. “She wanted to design jewelry and, after visiting Evergreen, she knew she could do that as well here as anywhere else in the country.” Caroline also needed to break free from her family’s hold. As a man, he’d be flattered to think Caroline had moved to Maine hoping to start a relationship with him.

And there it was. If Jenica had moved to California, he would have felt trapped. But now that Caroline was here, he didn’t feel trapped. Not at all. He welcomed getting to know her, developing a relationship with her. If he hadn’t ruined his chances by his hardheadedness and inability to forgive her father.

“Then it seems you have a love of minerals and gems in common,” Jenica said, interrupting his thoughts, getting him refocused on their conversation and back on track. “I’ve always liked them, too, you know.” That statement sounded pouty.

Yes, he knew. Jenica had hinted about her fondness for diamonds especially in the last couple of months, but in his eyes, they’d been nowhere near that point in their relationship. Maybe the fact he’d resisted the idea with everything in him should have tipped him off that it was time to end the relationship.

“What is it that Caroline Prescott has that I don’t have? Tell me, Seth. I’d really like to know.”

He hated that question. Above all, he wanted to be sensitive to Jenica. Her feelings had been fragile as of late and she’d often sought reassurance of his affection for her. Asked leading questions, hinted for a kiss, reached for his hand or run her finger up his arm in a playful manner. How could he answer her question without making her feel somehow inadequate or that she paled in comparison to Caroline?

Jenica stopped pacing and sat down beside him again, waiting for his response.

“I want you to find the love you deserve,” he whispered, “but I’m not that man.”

She nodded but didn’t look at him. “You’ve always been respectful and considerate of my feelings. Thank you for that.”

“You’ve been a big part of my life in the last few years, and I don’t want to lose you as a friend.  I’ve prayed for you, and I’ll continue to pray for you. Always.”

“I think I knew that day in the Antique Barn,” she said, her voice quiet. “When Caroline was talking about taking care of my treasure. At first, I thought she was talking about the Hummel, but I finally figured it out. She was talking about
you
, wasn’t she?”

Wow. How clueless was he? He’d wondered if that’s what Caroline meant but he couldn’t be sure. Jenica was right, and she’d been able to see Caroline’s underlying message much clearer than he had.

“From what little I know, Caroline seems like a nice person,” Jenica continued before he could respond. “I hope you’ll be very happy with her.” Jenica drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “You deserve the best.”

What gracious words. She was making this much easier than he deserved. While she wasn’t the right woman for him, she had a lot of great qualities to offer the right man. “You’re incredibly special, Jen. Thank you for being you.”

Taking her hand in his, Seth smiled when she leaned her head on his shoulder.

Chapter 23
~~♥~~

The next week passed just as quickly. Another week without hearing from Seth. Had he dismissed her from his life? Caroline couldn’t accept that idea as any kind of truth. Liesel told her that her mother had called Seth and they’d had a good chat. How she would have liked to have been privy to
that
conversation. No matter how many broad hints she’d dropped—and she’d been extremely patient without demanding answers—Liesel had been annoyingly tight-lipped.

She’d known Seth and Beverly were close, and Liesel
did
fill in some blanks for her in terms of Seth’s mother’s advanced dementia and his father’s basic retreat from life since the Boston trial. So, as it turns out, that information was what she’d needed. The light of understanding began to stir in Caroline’s heart.

She’d gone over and over Seth’s words in her mind since he’d told her about her dad prosecuting his dad’s criminal trial. Putting herself in the place of a teenage boy who’d been bullied and his dad branded a murderer even though nothing could be further from the truth. How would she have felt given the same circumstances? Instead of being the privileged daughter of the attorney who drove home to Beacon Hill in his luxury car every night, how would she feel if she were the teenage son of the man sitting in a Boston jail and accused of killing a man?

“Without trying to be cruel or insensitive, it seems to me that Seth’s dad allowed himself to be a victim,” Caroline observed during one of her self-proclaimed “therapy” sessions with Liesel. When Liesel remained quiet after that statement, Caroline tried to explain. “I realize I don’t know the man, and I know it’s wrong to judge. I’m not trying to do that, but I’m being as objective and unbiased as I can. From what I’ve heard, after his acquittal, Seth’s dad stayed in the same town and he didn’t try very hard to reestablish his business. He allowed it to flounder instead of fighting for it.”

“You’re a very strong person,” Liesel said. “Like your dad and probably your mom in her own way. The short answer is that some people aren’t that strong, Caroline. Christian or not, they don’t know what to do when they’re beaten down.” Caroline could tell she’d carefully measured her words. They were heartfelt and said with the proper mindset and heart attitude. Her best friend could be blunt, but Liesel was also diplomatic, especially when she was trying to make a point. Like her mother.

“So they just give up?” Caroline shook her head, unable to fathom the idea.

“Yes, or they simply allow their dreams to die.”

“That’s so sad. And Seth’s mother?” Caroline asked, realizing she might be pushing the limits with that question and was thankful this discussion was with her best friend and not Seth. Seth was so close to his parents that he was most likely blinded to the truth. Just as she acknowledged she might wear blinders when it came to her own parents. “Like blinkers,” she murmured.

“Excuse me?” Confusion was apparent in Liesel’s tone.

“Racehorses wear blinkers. They’re blinders for a horse’s eyes during a race when he’s running to win.” Caroline smiled. “I know I’m being random, but I’m thinking how both Seth and I might be blinded because in some ways we’re viewing what happened between our fathers from
their
perspective. Sure, the trial impacted Seth as a teenager, but his primary perspective—and how he’s reacting now—is because he saw the effects on his dad. And I’m looking at it the way my dad would.”

“You’re probably right. I never thought about it that way,” Liesel said.

“Trainers use blinkers to keep the horse focused on what’s straight ahead and on winning the race instead of on distractions in the crowd or anywhere else on the track. That’s how my dad has always operated in the courtroom. Focused on what’s ahead and the ultimate goal of winning. I’ve been focused on my dad’s dedication to his job and Seth has dwelled on the hurt on
his
dad caused by my dad’s commitment to getting the job done.”

Neither one right nor wrong.
Is that what you’re trying to tell me, Lord?

She’d like to share her insights with Seth, but would it matter?

Yes, it does matter
. First of all, Seth was her friend. He was with Jenica, so anything else that might happen between them was in the Lord’s hands.

Caroline’s mind worked furiously as she worked on the final design for her mystery client. She glanced at the clock. After emailing preliminary designs back and forth a few times with the Boston jeweler, she’d obtained the client’s final approval. Her supplier of gemstones had called to let her know the pink amethysts were ready for pickup. The client had been very particular as to the size and number of stones but left the design completely up to her, which actually made the process much easier. A dream client in some respects.

Standing back from the work table, Caroline eyed the designs with a critical eye. The amethysts would work well in her design. The gemstones would be showcased beautifully but neither would they overwhelm the wearer. The design would be suitable for a woman with a long, slender neck as well as a woman with a shorter neck. Not an easy task. Achieving the desired effect had been challenging and tricky—especially not knowing the recipient’s size, height, or anything about her—but Caroline was satisfied she’d accomplished her ultimate goal.

Toby was expected soon and she needed to have the design ready for him. Twenty minutes later, Caroline handed the folder to him. “Here go you. Larry called, too. The amethysts are in and ready for pickup. We should be all set to go.”

Opening the folder, Toby whistled under his breath. “This one sure will be a challenge. Biggest challenge yet, but I’m looking forward to it.” He gave her a wide grin. “You’ve outdone yourself this time, Miss Caroline. Something tells me this design will be bringing you a lot more new clients. Once the ladies in Boston or wherever see this necklace, you’ll be in big demand.”

“Thanks, Toby. I appreciate your vote of confidence. Do you think you can get it made by early November? Is that too soon? The jeweler asked if we could have it ready by then if at all possible. I don’t want to push you since I know you also have a few more pieces to put together for the Harvest Festival.”

“Not a problem. I should be able to get them all done,” Toby said. “Did you ever find out anything more about your mystery client?”

“Nope.” Caroline shrugged and returned Toby’s infectious grin. “That’s the way they want it, and they’re paying a lot of money, so I need to honor their request. As I worked on the design, I tried to imagine the type of woman who’d wear this necklace. I’ll probably never know, but it sure is fun to imagine.”

~~♥~~

“Hey, Seth.”

Seth turned from studying the selections in the fruit aisle. “Toby. Hey man, how are you? What brings you over to the Oxford Hills?” The other man had a small basket hanging from his arm. “Are you coming here to the Oxford Hills now to do your grocery shopping?”

“Nah. I had a painting to deliver in town and my wife called and asked me to pick up a few things on my way back home. Nonperishable things, so I figured I’d check out the store here.”

“Do you need help finding anything?”

“No,” Toby said. “How are you and Miss Jenica doing these days?” Toby picked up a bunch of bananas and turned it in his hands as if inspecting them.

“We broke up.”

“Oh?” Toby certainly was thorough in his selection of bananas. “Sorry to hear that. You’re what, thirty now?”

“Yeah, and getting older by the minute.”

“Then you’ve got plenty of time to find a nice woman and settle down. I’m sure you have your pick of the local girls.”

“Most of them are bored by my talk of rocks and minerals. They don’t find them particularly exciting and can’t understand or share my enthusiasm.” Jenica, for one, looked on his projects more as a hobby than a paying job although she never minded introducing him as Dr. Barnes to anyone who’d listen. She’d been his date for the occasional school event or presentation where it was better if he had a date with him. The university’s department chair preferred a married professor to dissuade any coeds from any romantic fantasies. That amused Seth but he hadn’t been immune to the flirtations from a few overly eager students. He never
acted
on them, but he was a man, after all.

“Could be a girl who didn’t grow up in the area might better appreciate what you do.” The bananas must have passed Toby’s inspection because he finally dropped them in his basket.

“Perhaps.” Seth narrowed his gaze. Toby had a point to make but he might have to inspect more fruit before he made it. Any guy who could paint with such intricate detail and beauty definitely paid attention and noticed subtle nuances.

Toby glanced over the selection of apples. Picking up two MacIntosh apples, one red and one green, he put them in his basket. “This is the perfect season for these MacIntosh apples. They ripen up in September, you know.”

Seth didn’t know but he watched and listened with increasing fascination. Good thing he wasn’t in a hurry because he definitely wanted to hear what the man had to say.

“The MacIntosh has a tough, hardy skin but it’s tender on the inside. In my estimation, the perfect balance of tart and sweet.”

Seth expected the man to bite into the apple right then. “Did you know the MacIntosh is nicknamed The Gem?”

Toby smiled. “Is that a fact? All this time, I didn’t know I had a gem right under my nose.”

“Toby, you couldn’t be more subtle if you hauled me over to Caroline’s house and pushed us together. From what I know, everyone in town’s expecting the same thing.”

“Yes, well,” the other man said as he selected more MacIntosh apples, both green and red, “I know you appreciate beauty with substance. And I know enough about Miss Caroline to know she’s got a real good heart and a whole lot of love to give to the right man. Provided that man opens his eyes and appreciates the beauty right in front of him.”

Seth laughed. “I love your directness. Have you got time for a cup of coffee?” An overwhelming urge to share with this man seized him. He figured if the Lord planted this man unexpectedly in his path today, He had his reasons. He nodded to the small coffee area of the grocery store. “Buy you a cup?”

“I’m sure you know about my dad’s trial.” Seth sat across from Toby a few minutes later. When Toby nodded, he continued. “Even after all these years, I’ve harbored bitterness in my heart for the prosecuting attorney in that trial.”

Toby raised a brow as he sipped his coffee. “Why’s that, do you suppose?”

Seth explained a bit more. But something was different this time. Significantly different. As he relayed the story, the bitterness slowly began to drain out of him, replaced by a new sense of peace. Amazing grace, indeed. The kind that only comes from a higher source of power than he had within himself. “After I first met Caroline, and then found out who her father was, I wrote her a letter and sent it to her parents’ home in Boston.”

“Ah, your version of a Dear John letter.”

“In a way, yes, but Caroline never got that letter. Then I took her up to Old Speck and mangled the situation by blasting her father all over again. She basically accused me of not being able to forgive him, slammed the door of the truck, and told me to have a nice life. I haven’t seen her since.” He frowned. “And I really can’t blame her.”

A slight smile upturned the corners of Toby’s mouth.

“I’m glad you find my life amusing,” Seth muttered, downing some of the bitter black coffee.

“I’m not laughing, son. I’m rejoicing.”

“Excuse me?” Leaning his elbow on the table, Seth stared at the other man.

“In everything you just told me about Caroline, what you’re telling me is that you love her.”

Seth squirmed on the chair. “I didn’t say I
didn’t
love her.”

“Let me tell you a little something about forgiveness,” Toby said.

“Please do. I could use prayer but some advice doesn’t hurt either.”

“Are you worried about what Caroline’s folks, and especially her dad, will say?”

“Yes and no. She doesn’t have the best relationship with them right now.”

“I see.” Toby’s brow creased. “And if you and Caroline get together, are you worried about what your folks will say?”

“Yes,” Seth said, “but we’ll deal with it when the time comes. My dad is wrapped up in caring for my mom. As you probably know, Mom has advanced dementia, so it’s not like I can have a meaningful conversation with her. Or him, for that matter.” His eyes misted with unexpected emotion. “In some ways, I don’t think my dad will have a problem with my feelings for Caroline even if he knows who her father is.” He shrugged. “He has no fight left in him, and in some ways, he’s a whole lot more forgiving than I am.”

Toby whistled under his breath. “Sounds like you and Caroline both have enough to handle.”

“We do, but Caroline’s strong enough to handle it.”

“You bet she is, son, and so are you. You know why? ’Cause you both look to the Lord for guidance. You’re both stubborn as anything but you try to do the right thing God’s way.”

Seth blew out a sigh. “I’ve prayed for years that the Lord might take this bitterness against Duncan Prescott away from me. So far, it hasn’t been working.”