Helpless (24 page)

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Authors: Barbara Gowdy

Tags: #Suspense

What research did you conduct while writing
Helpless?

I got in touch with a superintendent of the Toronto Police Force, the guy who literally wrote the book on child abduction, and from him I learned about the massive and intricately orchestrated operation that starts up when a child disappears. I also researched vintage vacuums, because Ron, the abductor, collects old vacuums, which he stores in his basement. I found, as I suspected I would, online sites devoted to vacuum cleaner collectors. The men who are interested in them are like the men who obsess about vintage cars. They keep the vacuums at peak performance and highly polished. The big thing is to have unused bags in your collection. Ron has a Constellation model with four unused bags. I also thought that interest in extreme cleanliness and newness could be linked to children. Children are new machines, they’re clean, they’re not suppurating and dying. For Ron, anyway, the obsession with vacuum cleaners and the love of little children are linked.

“For Ron…the obsession with vacuum cleaners and the love of little children are linked.”

Do you feel you have obsessions that reveal themselves through your writing?

When I taught creative writing, I used to tell my students to write not what they know but what they’re obsessed by. They’ll use what
they know anyway, for settings and anecdotes. I seem to be obsessed by attachment, the need for humans to attach themselves to other humans, and how helpless we all are before this need. Also, I’m concerned by who it is we find worthy, what sort of human being. What are our yardsticks? How qualified are we to judge? In
Helpless,
for instance, Ron could be seen as heroic, because though he has pedophilic feelings, he does not act on them. To have feelings as strong as his, and to have the object of your love so close and to repress your feelings, could be considered heroic, or it could be considered appalling and disgusting just to have those feelings in the first place. I tend to come down on the side of judging people by their behaviours, not their thoughts.

“I seem to be obsessed by attachment…and how helpless we all are before this need.”

Is it this decision not to act on his feelings that makes Ron, as you have described him, “not a typical abductor”?

It is definitely not normal for a man to abduct a young girl and then to treat her adoringly and gently, as Ron does. Normally, the girl is used and then quickly disposed of. But that horrible narrative is not one I had any desire to pursue. Ron, very much like Lewis Carroll, the creator of
Alice in Wonderland,
loves little girls. He is an aesthete, a connoisseur of young female beauty. He is convinced that he is abducting Rachel to save her from abuse in her home. At the same time, he knows he has inappropriate feelings for her. Lewis Carroll also
harboured such feelings. In his diary, Carroll referred to them as “unholy thoughts,” “unwanted thoughts.” As far as we know, he never acted upon them.

Was it difficult to tread a middle ground between creating a sympathetic character in Ron and letting him off the hook?

My editor in New York asked me, “Do we have to like the guy?” and I said, “No, but he has to be real.” I couldn’t bear to have Rachel abducted by a monster. I wanted to make him someone who hadn’t yet fallen. I wanted him to have a moral dilemma. That’s more interesting to me. If a character has already fallen, there’s no dilemma.

“I wanted Ron to have a moral dilemma…If a character has already fallen, there’ no dilemma.”

What differences have you observed between the reactions ofmale reviewers and female reviewers?

Most of the reviews I’ve received from women have been great. They’ve said there is so much tension, and they were grateful that Ron is dimensional. A few male reviewers have said the same thing, but most men say, “This book has no tension because Ron’s a human being.” I think interest in young girls, a passing interest, a flash of interest, is so prevalent and so frightening to men that they want to hate Ron, they want him to be really bad, and they want me to take him out. I didn’t do that.

It’s fascinating to see how nine-year-old Rachel, the object of Ron’s obsession, deals with her captivity.

She doesn’t understand why she’s there, so she creates her own narrative to make sense of her situation. When you see footage of little kids in war-torn places, and they’re smiling and waving for the camera, you think, How can they be smiling? Their town has just been blown up, their parents maybe dead. But children are so remarkably resilient, and I think they invent narratives to bring sense to a senseless adult world.

You make much of Rachel’s beauty and how she accepts her effect on people.

“It’s Rachel’s reality to be beautiful; she knows that it gives her power.”

Rachel is a mixed child, Caucasian and black. She’s exactly like a stunningly beautiful girl I saw in a park in Toronto. She was playing Frisbee with her father, who was black. She had pale, mocha skin, chromium-yellow hair with tight little curls, blue eyes, black lashes…I felt the gratitude you feel when you see an exotic bird. People were staring at her, but she seemed completely indifferent, as I think at some point you would. There’s a line in the book where someone compliments Rachel, and she says, “Thank you,” and I have her mother think how she accepts compliments politely, but a little gravely, as another child might accept a gift she already has. It’s her reality to be beautiful; she knows that it gives her power.

In your novel, each of the characters experiences helplessness, including the abductor, but what sources of power come into play?

The power of beauty. The terrible power of too much desire. And how power shifts. In any normal relationship, the beloved holds power over the lover. Ron obviously holds the physical power. But the emotional power very quickly shifts to Rachel. She eventually senses the shift and exploits it.

What can fiction such as
Helpless
accomplish that other types of writing cannot?

Fiction can give order and meaning to chaos. It can impart a view of life that encourages readers to reflect upon their own views. It can be a moral guide in that way. Good fiction isn’t simply faked reality. Hemingway has something interesting to say about this. In an old
Paris Review
piece that I recently came across, he said, “From things that have happened and from things as they exist and from all things that you know and all those you cannot know, you make something through your invention that is not a representation but a whole new thing, truer than anything true and alive.”

“Good fiction isn’t simply faked reality.”

Selected edited excerpts are reprinted with the permission ofRamona Koval, from an interview broadcast on
The Book Show,
ABC Radio National, Australia (May 21,2007) and published in
Brick
literary journal (Winter 2007).

Read On
Works by Barbara Gowdy

Through the Green Valley
(1988)

In eighteenth-century Ireland, the son of a peasant farmer struggles to find his place in the world.

Falling Angels
(1989)

This black-humoured story features three sisters growing up during the 1950s in the shadow of their mother’s heartbreak.

We So Seldom Look on Love
(1992)

Tender and empathetic, these short stories feature people whose interests, and sometimes their very anatomy, make them complete outsiders.

To receive updates on author events and new books by Barbara Gowdy, sign up today at
www.authortracker.ca.

Mister Sandman
(1995)

In this hilarious and disturbing novel, one family’s immoderate passions and potentially explosive secrets are exposed.

The White Bone
(1998)

This engrossing fantasy plunges the reader into the world of African elephants as they fight to survive drought and slaughter.

The Romantic
(2003)

When a mother disappears, her daughter develops a devotion to her neighbour’s precocious son.

Web Detective

www.prosecast.com

Listen to the HarperCollins Canada Prosecast interview with Barbara Gowdy. On the main page, scroll down to “Search this Site,” and key in “Gowdy”.

www.youtube.com

On the YouTube website, search for “Barbara Gowdy”. View “Barbara Gowdy Talks about
Helpless,”
an interview featuring Gowdy and senior editor of
The Walrus,
Marni Jackson.

www.torontolife.com/features/barbara-gowdy

Read
Toronto Life’s
interview with Barbara Gowdy.

www.eyeweekly.com/arts/features/article/804

Eye Weekly takes a
look at the stage adaptation of
The White Bone.

www.ourmissingchildren.gc.ca

This Government of Canada website provides a wealth of information, including a list of child-find organizations, a missingchildren database, an explanation of AMBER Alert and safety tips for parents.

www.weeklywire.com/ww/10-12-98/austin_arts_featurel.html

Weekly Wire’s article “The Man Who Loved Little Girls” (October 12,1998) provides background on author Lewis Carroll, whose obsession with little girls Barbara Gowdy
has compared to that of Ron, the abductor in
Helpless.

www.historicaltextarchive.com/sections.php?op=viewarticle&artid=769

For anyone interested in vintage vacuums, History Text Archive offers “Vacuum Cleaners Before Electricity—and a Little-Known Inventor,” which traces the history of vacuums, and includes a bibliography and list of websites with photos.

An Excerpt from
The White Bone

It is the matriarchs who keep track of the days—how many since the last rainfall, how many until the black plums ripen, how many since a bull was in musth or a cow in oestrus, and so on. Their method is mysterious, even to them. Anyone can come up with the exact number eventually, by counting backwards or forwards day by day. For the matriarch, the calculation is immediate. It is not a skill she learns. She assumes the family’s leadership and several hours later if somebody mentions, for instance, the evening a certain calf died, she finds herself thinking, “Four years and fortyseven days ago.”

“It is the matriarchs who keep track of the days.”

Of all the gifts that aren’t Date Bed’s, this precise, instantaneous measuring of the passage of time is the one she used to envy the most. As a young calf she tried to train herself to count days at matriarchal speed and when she finally accepted that it couldn’t be done she devised a short-cut (“grouping,” she calls it) for arriving at a close approximation. Instead of tallying the days, grouping tallies the full moons, which occur every thirty days, give or take a day. Two full moons, or two groups of thirty days, add up to sixty days. Three groups are ninety days. You only have to do the addition once to know forever afterwards how many days or years are in five groups, or thirty-five, or in seventy-three and a half.

Every morning when she chisels another scratch into her left tusk she wonders if
her life’s remaining days will add up to the three and a half groups that would bring her age to exactly thirteen years. She is not very hopeful. The wound above her right eye has scabbed over, but behind the scab is a buzzing sensation that is only slightly relieved by eating cycad bark. Coming to her feet she reels through a dizzy spell, and several times a day she falls into hallucinations—ravish ingly strange, and as sharply visible as if she were looking through Mud’s eyes, but disturbing. She is walking in an immense cavern where it is somehow as bright as midday, and on each side of her, in phenomenally straight rows, stacks of strange fruits—sweet-scented and vividly coloured (red, orange, yellow)—glide by; she is on a rise of land and, all around her, tiny white blossoms drift from a frigid sky and sting her skin and settle on the earth like sand.

“She prays, despite the fact that she has little faith in prayer and no comprehension of it.”

None of these complaints are necessarily deadly and they do not frighten her. What does is that her memory is leaking. Six mornings ago, a blue lizard scrambled past her face. She could not identify it, although she knew she had studied that breed and added it to her lizard inventory. Since then, half of her memories have been shadow memories: impeccable in parts, in other parts faded or gone altogether.

She prays, despite the fact that she has little faith in prayer and no comprehension of it. How can the circumstances of a preordained life be altered by begging? Her prayers, consequently, are modest. When she prays that the
remnants of her family are safe, she is thinking especially of Mud and her mother but does not presume to single anybody out. For herself she asks that she suffer no more than she can bear and that if her fate is to survive she not thwart that fate through foolishness or inattentiveness. She may add that she hopes the leaking of her memory will spontaneously stop, as haemorrhaging sometimes does, or that she comes upon a family whose nurse cow knows a remedy. “I would love to see my own family again,” she throws in. Instead of pleading to find the white bone, she describes to herself, in prayerlike phrasing, various aspects of The Safe Place: “…for in that blessed realm are swamps, where grasses sweet and new…”

“She finds a sharp stone and chisels another scratch in her tusk. One scratch for every day since the slaughter.”

It is at dawn, just after she has come to her feet, that she prays. Such is her ambivalence that she can bring herself to petition the She only when she is reeling with dizziness and not quite herself and therefore the She may pardon her impertinence. When the dizziness stops she finds a sharp stone and chisels another scratch in her tusk. One scratch for every day since the slaughter. This is not yet a necessity, it is a precaution. She has no idea how quickly her memory is leaking, but she has met old cows who couldn’t tell whether it had been an hour or a year since they’d last spoken with her, and she must prepare herself for becoming that addled. She thinks of the scratches as a kind of net. The apprehension of time going by may fall from her body, but here it will be, caught on her tusk.

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