Helpless (Blue Fire Saga) (24 page)

Cocooned in Rave’s embrace, she began to feel like she was floating weightlessly in some transcendent place, up among the stars, perhaps, as the moon watched jealously. Yet at the same time she felt solidly grounded and supported in ways she could never describe. She was certain she could feel Rave’s heart beating against her chest—or was that merely her own heart thumping?

This was not simply dancing, not even close. Like the last time, this was a joining, a commingling of body and spirit. Until she’d met Rave, she had never imagined this kind of feeling existed. Except for the music, the room seemed to have gone silent, as if she and Rave were alone in their own little world, the music playing solely for them. The song seemed to last for hours, yet somehow ended all too soon. She lingered in Rave’s warm embrace for several moments after the song ended. Everything that had happened tonight—from Rave’s loving compliments on her appearance to recalling the first time they’d spoken to this amazing dance—had been reminders to her, reminders of why she was putting herself in danger by embracing her magic. She wanted moments like this to go on for centuries, and her magic was the only way she could make that happen.

“Thank you, Cali,” Leesa said when she finally lifted her head from Rave’s shoulder. “That was great.”

“You’re welcome. That’s what best buds are for.”

“I hope Andy doesn’t get in trouble for inserting such a ‘normal’ song into the playlist.”

“Naaah…it was already on the list for later. He just moved it up a bit.”

Leesa had been so lost in the dance she hadn’t even noticed the next song was already playing. Katy Perry was happily proclaiming that she’d “kissed a girl and she liked it.” Leesa wondered if the frat guys had chosen it to show their tolerance and inclusion or simply to put some kinky thoughts into the minds of their female guests. She was betting on the latter.

“I need to talk privately with Rave for a few moments,” she said. “I hope you guys don’t mind.”

“Go ahead,” Cali said. She grabbed Andy’s hand. “I’ll take this guy out on the dance floor. Maybe this song will give him some new ideas.”

Andy smiled and shrugged in a “what am I gonna do with her?” gesture. Cali led him out into the crowd in the middle of the room, giving Leesa and Rave time to talk.

“I want to speed up my training with Dominic,” Leesa said. “I want to learn how to use my magic more quickly.”

Rave smiled, and Leesa guessed he knew the reason behind her declaration. She was sure he would speed up his training with
Rammugul
if he could.

“How?” he asked.

“Instead of doing day trips, I’m going to ask Dominic to take me away for the whole weekend so we can get a lot more practice in.” She took Rave’s hand. “Do you think you can come?”

“Of course.” Rave thought for a moment. “It’s probably too late to find Dominic tonight. How about I stay with you tonight, and then he can tell me where you two are going in the morning. You’ll get there first, but I promise not to be too far behind.”

Leesa squeezed Rave’s hand and kissed his check. She loved it when he spent the night with her. She always slept so peacefully.

“Perfect,” she said. “Absolutely perfect. Just like you.”

She snuggled against him, totally content. Now no matter what time they left the party, the night was not going to end.

37. doubts

S
hortly before eleven o’clock on Saturday morning, Leesa and Dominic checked into a small motel along the side of a two-lane state highway about twenty miles south of Albany, New York. An off and on again drizzle made the drive more taxing than it should have been, forcing Leesa to concentrate more on her driving than usual and to constantly fiddle with the setting on the windshield wipers. At least it was daytime, she thought. Tonight, the water on the roads might freeze into slick patches of ice.

The small and very dated motel office was manned by a bored looking guy who appeared to be at least seventy years old, if not older. His face was lined with deep wrinkles and stained with dark liver spots. His bony hands showed even more spots than his face. Still, he flashed a friendly smile when Leesa and Dominic walked in. Leesa guessed the guy was probably happy to see anyone, whether they were customers or not.

They selected adjacent rooms, paid for in cash by Dominic. According to a sign in the office, the motel’s official check-in time was not until one, but winter was the slow season and the old man was more than happy to exchange two room keys for Dominic’s cash. Right now, the Blazer was the only vehicle parked in front of the motel, and Leesa would not be surprised if it remained that way through the night.

The place had clearly seen better days, but they were not looking for luxury. The pale green paint was peeling from the one-story wooden building, though the dark green doors looked to have been freshly painted—freshly meaning sometime in the last few years. The entire motel consisted of only fourteen rooms, all arranged in a line facing the highway. Stringy brown weeds poked up from cracks in the crumbling asphalt parking area that separated the structure from the highway. About a quarter mile down the road they could see the red and white oval sign of a coffee shop, so they would have somewhere nearby to eat.

Dominic had asked for rooms fourteen and fifteen—the motel having skipped number thirteen to avoid offending any superstitious travelers—which were at the far end of the building. Leesa moved the Blazer into a spot in front of room fourteen while Dominic walked the short distance to the end of the building. After she parked, Leesa pulled the stuffed backpack that was her luggage from the back seat. Dominic did not have any luggage, of course. He always wore the same magic infused clothes, and any essentials he needed fit into his magical wallet. Leesa couldn’t wait until she could make one of those handy things for herself. She wondered when that would be.

It didn’t take her long to hang her change of clothes in the closet and to put a few things into the top drawer of a worn wooden dresser. She limped into the small bathroom—it was clean, thank goodness—and turned on the water in the sink. She splashed some onto her face and washed her hands. Ready to begin training, she locked her door and knocked on Dominic’s.

The wizard was ready to go, so they set off in the Blazer for the park Dominic had chosen about two miles down the road. Rave was going to meet them at the park. Until this morning, Dominic had no idea Leesa wanted to stay overnight, so he had not known where they would be staying. He had selected the park a few days ago on one of his road trips, so he had given Rave directions to the park.

When they pulled into the park’s small asphalt parking area they had the entire lot to themselves. As usual, Dominic had chosen a place with several hiking trails that would provide privacy, but the cold drizzly day had kept everyone away, making it unnecessary to go very far from the parking lot. Woods bordered three sides of the lot, with a grass field adjacent to the fourth side. Several groves of dark green mountain laurel bushes were scattered throughout the woods, their color in stark contrast to the barren gray and brown of the taller trees. Leesa didn’t know it, but the mountain laurels were one of the reasons Dominic had selected this park.

The drizzle had mostly stopped when Leesa climbed out of the Blazer, but the air was still plenty cold and damp. She pulled her knit cap down over her ears and then shoved her hands into her pockets. Dominic guided her around to the front of the Blazer, where they would be shielded from sight should anyone happen to drive into the park.

“Perfect weather to practice a little body warming,” Dominic said, smiling. “So let’s start with that. Give me your coat.”

As Leesa unzipped her parka, she was especially glad now that the rain had stopped. She started shivering as soon as she took her coat off and handed it Dominic. She wondered if he would have made her try this if it were still raining. They had only worked on staying warm, not staying dry.

Closing her eyes, Leesa repeated her trigger and began to visualize. She had come up with what she felt was the perfect image to warm her—blue fire burning in her belly. She knew Rave didn’t really have blue flames in his stomach—at least she was pretty sure he didn’t—but she had seen the flames flicker from his fingertips enough times and it was an easy and fun visual for her to use. In just a few seconds, warmth began to flow through her body. She opened her eyes and smiled at Dominic.

“So, what’s new, wizard?” she asked, making idle conversation to show him she wasn’t feeling the least bit cold.

Dominic studied her closely. “Not much,” he said after a few moments. “Just that it’s awful cold and damp out here.”

Leesa knew he was trying to break her concentration and make her think about the cold.

“Is it? I hadn’t noticed. You can wear my coat if you want. I don’t need it.”

Amazingly, she really didn’t need it. The image of the blue fire inside her was keeping her comfortably warm. She didn’t know how much of it came from thinking about the blue flames and how much was from the fire’s association to Rave, but it didn’t matter. All that counted was that she had been standing here in the cold for five minutes now and was not the least bit tempted to hug her arms across her chest, let alone reach for her parka.

Dominic smiled. “Very good. Very good indeed.” He kicked a golf ball sized stone a few inches away from the curb. “Move this,” he instructed.

Leesa stared down at the stone, concentrating. In a moment, it started rolling along the asphalt, traveling a good three feet before it stopped. Just seeing the rock move a few inches when Dominic had nudged it away from the curb had been all the visual she had needed. And even better, she still wasn’t cold.

“Do you want your coat yet?” Dominic asked. “It’s really very chilly out here.”

Leesa shook her head. “No, I’m fine.” To show him how fine she was, she pulled her cap from her head and tossed it onto the hood of the Blazer.

Dominic looked at her appraisingly, a trace of a smile on his lips. He took two steps out onto the field and returned with a flat, rectangular rock about four inches in length. Bending at the knees, he placed the stone onto the asphalt. There would be no visual of this rock moving for Leesa to use.

“Let’s see what you can do with this one,” he said.

Leesa tried as hard as she could, but the stone stubbornly refused to move. Worse, she suddenly felt assaulted by the cold. She began to shiver and tucked her hands under her arms.

Dominic handed her coat to her. She quickly pulled it on, then grabbed her cap and put that on, too.

“You must learn to separate your successes and your failures,” Dominic told her. “As soon as you failed to move the rock, some part of you began to doubt your magic, and that let the cold get to you. Successes, you can link together, because success builds upon success. But your struggles, you must try to isolate. You have a lot of magic inside you—you must not let difficulties with one kind affect any of the other kinds.

Leesa nodded, understanding what Dominic was saying, but not quite sure how to go about actually doing it. She was going to have to think more about it later.

She was suddenly aware of a presence standing beside her. As usual, she had not heard Rave approach. He was wearing his black and white flannel shirt and jeans.

She smiled. “Hi. I didn’t hear you come up.”

Rave grinned. “You’re not supposed to.” He kissed Leesa’s cheek and then turned his head toward Dominic. “Dominic heard me, though. Maybe he can teach you.”

“I didn’t so much hear you as felt you,” Dominic said. “But yes, eventually Leesa should be able to do so as well.”

“What have you two been doing?” Rave asked.

“I was playing volkaane,” Leesa said. “You should have seen me. Fifteen minutes out here, at least, without my coat. I just visualize a blue fire in my belly and that’s all I need to keep me warm.”

Rave smiled, clearly pleased with Leesa’s use of the blue fire image.

“So why the coat now?”

Leesa made her face into an exaggerated pout. She kicked at the rock she had failed to move.

“That stupid rock refused to move when I told it to,” she said. “And that made the fire in my stomach disappear.”

“Doubts,” Dominic said. “Even subconscious doubts are your enemy.” He turned to Rave. “She’s been doing remarkably well, though.”

Leesa remembered talking about this same thing with Rave, back before she knew she had magic in her. She had moved things a couple of times—including Edwina when she attacked Cali—when she’d been angry or tired. She and Rave had surmised that somehow emotions or fatigue short-circuited her logical mind, which told her that moving something simply by thinking about it was impossible. She knew better now, though. Of course it was possible; she had done it many times. Her new doubts were probably about ever being able to control her powers. The only way to get rid of those, she knew, was to keep using her magic successfully.

She pictured the blue fire burning in her stomach again and then took off her coat.

“Let’s get back to work,” she said determinedly.