Henry James: Complete Stories 1864-1874 (121 page)

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Authors: Henry James

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Page 723
lights, Morgan said suddenly to his companion: Do you like ityou know, being with us all in this intimate way?
My dear fellow, why should I stay if I didn't?
How do I know you will stay? I'm almost sure you won't very long.
I hope you don't mean to dismiss me, said Pemberton.
Morgan considered a moment, looking at the sunset. I think if I did right I ought to.
Well, I know I'm supposed to instruct you in virtue; but in that case don't do right.
You're very youngfortunately, Morgan went on, turning to him again.
Oh yes, compared with you!
Therefore, it won't matter so much if you do lose a lot of time.
That's the way to look at it, said Pemberton accommodatingly.
They were silent a minute; after which the boy asked: Do you like my father and mother very much?
Dear me, yes. They're charming people.
Morgan received this with another silence; then, unexpectedly, familiarly, but at the same time affectionately, he remarked: You're a jolly old humbug!
For a particular reason the words made Pemberton change colour. The boy noticed in an instant that he had turned red, whereupon he turned red himself and the pupil and the master exchanged a longish glance in which there was a consciousness of many more things than are usually touched upon, even tacitly, in such a relation. It produced for Pemberton an embarrassment; it raised, in a shadowy form, a question (this was the first glimpse of it), which was destined to play as singular and, as he imagined, owing to the altogether peculiar conditions, an unprecedented part in his intercourse with his little companion. Later, when he found himself talking with this small boy in a way in which few small boys could ever have been talked with, he thought of that clumsy moment on the bench at Nice as the dawn of an understanding that had broadened. What had added to the clumsiness then was that he thought it his duty to declare to Morgan that he might
 
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abuse him (Pemberton) as much as he liked, but must never abuse his parents. To this Morgan had the easy reply that he hadn't dreamed of abusing them; which appeared to be true: it put Pemberton in the wrong.
Then why am I a humbug for saying
I
think them charming? the young man asked, conscious of a certain rashness.
Wellthey're not
your
parents.
They love you better than anything in the worldnever forget that, said Pemberton.
Is that why you like them so much?
They're very kind to me, Pemberton replied, evasively.
You
are
a humbug! laughed Morgan, passing an arm into his tutor's. He leaned against him, looking off at the sea again and swinging his long, thin legs.
Don't kick my shins, said Pemberton, while he reflected: Hang it, I can't complain of them to the child!
There's another reason, too, Morgan went on, keeping his legs still.
Another reason for what?
Besides their not being your parents.
I don't understand you, said Pemberton.
Well, you will before long. All right!
Pemberton did understand, fully, before long; but he made a fight even with himself before he confessed it. He thought it the oddest thing to have a struggle with the child about. He wondered he didn't detest the child for launching him in such a struggle. But by the time it began the resource of detesting the child was closed to him. Morgan was a special case, but to know him was to accept him on his own odd terms. Pemberton had spent his aversion to special cases before arriving at knowledge. When at last he did arrive he felt that he was in an extreme predicament. Against every interest he had attached himself. They would have to meet things together. Before they went home that evening, at Nice, the boy had said, clinging to his arm:
Well, at any rate you'll hang on to the last.
To the last?
Till you're fairly beaten.
You
ought to be fairly beaten! cried the young man, drawing him closer.
 
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IV.
A year after Pemberton had come to live with them Mr. and Mrs. Moreen suddenly gave up the villa at Nice. Pemberton had got used to suddenness, having seen it practiced on a considerable scale during two jerky little toursone in Switzerland the first summer, and the other late in the winter, when they all ran down to Florence and then, at the end of ten days, liking it much less than they had intended, straggled back in mysterious depression. They had returned to Nice for ever, as they said; but this didn't prevent them from squeezing, one rainy, muggy May night, into a second-class railway-carriageyou could never tell by which class they would travelwhere Pemberton helped them to stow away a wonderful collection of bundles and bags. The explanation of this manuvre was that they had determined to spend the summer in some bracing place; but in Paris they dropped into a small furnished apartmenta fourth floor in a third-rate avenue, where there was a smell on the staircase and the
portier
was hatefuland passed the next four months in blank indigence.
The better part of this baffled sojourn was for the preceptor and his pupil, who, visiting the Invalides and Notre Dame, the Conciergerie and all the museums, took a hundred remunerative rambles. They learned to know their Paris, which was useful, for they came back another year for a longer stay, the general character of which in Pemberton's memory to-day mixes pitiably and confusedly with that of the first. He sees Morgan's shabby knickerbockersthe everlasting pair that didn't match his blouse and that as he grew longer could only grow faded. He remembers the particular holes in his three or four pair of coloured stockings.
Morgan was dear to his mother, but he never was better dressed than was absolutely necessarypartly, no doubt, by his own fault, for he was as indifferent to his appearance as a German philosopher. My dear fellow, you
are
coming to pieces, Pemberton would say to him in sceptical remonstrance; to which the child would reply, looking at him serenely up and down: My dear fellow, so are you! I don't want to cast you in the shade. Pemberton could have no
 
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rejoinder for thisthe assertion so closely represented the fact. If however the deficiencies of his own wardrobe were a chapter by themselves he didn't like his little charge to look too poor. Later he used to say: Well, if we are poor, why, after all, shouldn't we look it? and he consoled himself with thinking there was something rather elderly and gentlemanly in Morgan's seedinessit differed from the untidiness of the urchin who plays and spoils his things. He could trace perfectly the degrees by which, in proportion as her little son confined himself to his tutor for society, Mrs. Moreen shrewdly forbore to renew his garments. She did nothing that didn't show, neglected him because he escaped notice, and then, as he illustrated this clever policy, discouraged at home his public appearances. Her position was logical enoughthose members of her family who did show had to be showy.
During this period and several others Pemberton was quite aware of how he and his comrade might strike people; wandering languidly through the Jardin des Plantes as if they had nowhere to go, sitting, on the winter days, in the galleries of the Louvre, so splendidly ironical to the homeless, as if for the advantage of the
calorifère.
They joked about it sometimes: it was the sort of joke that was perfectly within the boy's compass. They figured themselves as part of the vast, vague, hand-to-mouth multitude of the enormous city and pretended they were proud of their position in itit showed them such a lot of life and made them conscious of a sort of democratic brotherhood. If Pemberton could not feel a sympathy in destitution with his small companion (for after all Morgan's fond parents would never have let him really suffer), the boy would at least feel it with him, so it came to the same thing. He used sometimes to wonder what people would think they werefancy they were looked askance at, as if it might be a suspected case of kidnapping. Morgan wouldn't be taken for a young patrician with a preceptorhe wasn't smart enough; though he might pass for his companion's sickly little brother. Now and then he had a five-franc piece, and except once, when they bought a couple of lovely neckties, one of which he made Pemberton accept, they laid it out scientifically in old books. It was a great day, always spent on the quays, rummaging among the dusty boxes that garnish
 
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the parapets. These were occasions that helped them to live, for their books ran low very soon after the beginning of their acquaintance. Pemberton had a good many in England, but he was obliged to write to a friend and ask him kindly to get some fellow to give him something for them.
If the bracing climate was untasted that summer the young man had an idea that at the moment they were about to make a push the cup had been dashed from their lips by a movement of his own. It had been his first blow-out, as he called it, with his patrons; his first successful attempt (though there was little other success about it), to bring them to a consideration of his impossible position. As the ostensible eve of a costly journey the moment struck him as a good one to put in a signal protestto present an ultimatum. Ridiculous as it sounded he had never yet been able to compass an uninterrupted private interview with the elder pair or with either of them singly. They were always flanked by their elder children, and poor Pemberton usually had his own little charge at his side. He was conscious of its being a house in which the surface of one's delicacy got rather smudged; nevertheless he had kept the bloom of his scruple against announcing to Mr. and Mrs. Moreen with publicity that he couldn't go on longer without a little money. He was still simple enough to suppose Ulick and Paula and Amy might not know that since his arrival he had only had a hundred and forty francs; and he was magnanimous enough to wish not to compromise their parents in their eyes. Mr. Moreen now listened to him, as he listened to every one and to everything, like a man of the world, and seemed to appeal to himthough not of course too grosslyto try and be a little more of one himself. Pemberton recognised the importance of the character from the advantage it gave Mr. Moreen. He was not even confused, whereas poor Pemberton was more so than there was any reason for. Neither was he surprisedat least any more than a gentleman had to be who freely confessed himself a little shocked, though not, strictly, at Pemberton.
We must go into this, mustn't we, dear? he said to his wife. He assured his young friend that the matter should have his very best attention; and he melted into space as elusively as if, at the door, he were taking an inevitable but deprecatory
 
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precedence. When, the next moment, Pemberton found himself alone with Mrs. Moreen it was to hear her say: I see, I see, stroking the roundness of her chin and looking as if she were only hesitating between a dozen easy remedies. If they didn't make their push Mr. Moreen could at least disappear for several days. During his absence his wife took up the subject again spontaneously, but her contribution to it was merely that she had thought all the while they were getting on so beautifully. Pemberton's reply to this revelation was that unless they immediately handed him a substantial sum he would leave them for ever. He knew she would wonder how he would get away, and for a moment expected her to inquire. She didn't, for which he was almost grateful to her, so little was he in a position to tell.
You won't, you know you won'tyou're too interested, she said. You
are
interested, you know you are, you dear, kind man! She laughed, with almost condemnatory archness, as if it were a reproach (but she wouldn't insist), while she flirted a soiled pocket-handkerchief at him.
Pemberton's mind was fully made up to quit the house the following week. This would give him time to get an answer to a letter he had despatched to England. If he did nothing of the sortthat is, if he stayed another year and then went away only for three monthsit was not merely because before the answer to his letter came (most unsatisfactory when it did arrive), Mr. Moreen generously presented himagain with all the precautions of a man of the worldthree hundred francs. He was exasperated to find that Mrs. Moreen was right, that he couldn't bear to leave the child. This stood out clearer for the very reason that, the night of his desperate appeal to his patrons, he had seen fully for the first time where he was. Wasn't it another proof of the success with which those patrons practiced their arts that they had managed to avert for so long the illuminating flash? It descended upon Pemberton with a luridness which perhaps would have struck a spectator as comically excessive, after he had returned to his little servile room, which looked into a close court where a bare, dirty opposite wall took, with the sound of shrill clatter, the reflection of lighted back-windows. He had simply given himself away to a band of adventurers. The idea, the word itself, had

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