Henry James: Complete Stories 1864-1874 (87 page)

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Authors: Henry James

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Page 515
front on Mr. Wendover simply in order to have a little chat with Lady Ringrose. There was something else, there was some one else, in the affair; and when once the girl's idea had become as definite as that it took but little longer to associate itself with the image of Captain Crispin. This image made her draw back further behind her curtain, because it brought the blood to her face; and if she coloured for shame she coloured also for anger. Captain Crispin was there, in the opposite box; those horrible women concealed him (she forgot how harmless and well-read Lady Ringrose had appeared to her that time at Mellows); they had lent themselves to this abominable proceeding. Selina was nestling there in safety with him, by their favour, and she had had the baseness to lay and honest girl, the most loyal, the most unselfish of sisters, under contribution to the same end. Laura crimsoned with the sense that she had been, unsuspectingly, part of a scheme, that she was being used as the two women opposite were used, but that she had been outraged into the bargain, inasmuch as she was not, like them, a conscious accomplice and not a person to be given away in that manner before hundreds of people. It came back to her how bad Selina had been the day of the business in Lincoln's Inn Fields, and how in spite of intervening comedies the woman who had then found such words of injury would be sure to break out in a new spot with a new weapon. Accordingly, while the pure music filled the place and the rich picture of the stage glowed beneath it, Laura found herself face to face with the strange inference that the evil of Selina's nature made her wishsince she had given herself to itto bring her sister to her own colour by putting an appearance of fastness upon her. The girl said to herself that she would have succeeded, in the cynical view of London; and to her troubled spirit the immense theatre had a myriad eyes, eyes that she knew, eyes that would know her, that would see her sitting there with a strange young man. She had recognised many faces already and her imagination quickly multiplied them. However, after she had burned a while with this particular revolt she ceased to think of herself and of what, as regarded herself, Selina had intended: all her thought went to the mere calculation of Mrs. Berrington's return. As she did not return, and still did not, Laura felt a sharp constriction of
 
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the heart. She knew not what she fearedshe knew not what she supposed. She was so nervous (as she had been the night she waited, till morning, for her sister to re-enter the house in Grosvenor Place) that when Mr. Wendover occasionally made a remark to her she failed to understand him, was unable to answer him. Fortunately he made very few; he was preoccupiedeither wondering also what Selina was up to or, more probably, simply absorbed in the music. What she
had
comprehended, however, was that when at three different moments she had said, restlessly, Why doesn't Mr. Booker come back? he replied, Oh, there's plenty of timewe are very comfortable. These words she was conscious of; she particularly noted them and they interwove themselves with her restlessness. She also noted, in her tension, that after her third inquiry Mr. Wendover said something about looking up his friend, if she didn't mind being left alone a moment. He quitted the box and during this interval Laura tried more than ever to see with her glass what had become of her sister. But it was as if the ladies opposite had arranged themselves, had arranged their curtains, on purpose to frustrate such an attempt: it was impossible to her even to assure herself of what she had begun to suspect, that Selina was now not with them. If she was not with them where in the world had she gone? As the moments elapsed, before Mr. Wendover's return, she went to the door of the box and stood watching the lobby, for the chance that he would bring back the absentee. Presently she saw him coming alone, and something in the expression of his face made her step out into the lobby to meet him. He was smiling, but he looked embarrassed and strange, especially when he saw her standing there as if she wished to leave the place.
I hope you don't want to go, he said, holding the door for her to pass back into the box.
Where are theywhere are they? she demanded, remaining in the corridor.
I saw our friendhe has found a place in the stalls, near the door by which you go into themjust here under us.
And does he like that better?
Mr. Wendover's smile became perfunctory as he looked
 
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down at her. Mrs. Berrington has made such an amusing request of him.
An amusing request?
She made him promise not to come back.
Made him promise? Laura stared.
She asked himas a particular favour to hernot to join us again. And he said he wouldn't.
Ah, the monster! Laura exclaimed, blushing crimson.
Do you mean poor Mr. Booker? Mr. Wendover asked. Of course he had to assure her that the wish of so lovely a lady was law. But he doesn't understand! laughed the young man.
No more do I. And where is the lovely lady? said Laura, trying to recover herself.
He hasn't the least idea.
Isn't she with Lady Ringrose?
If you like I will go and see.
Laura hesitated, looking down the curved lobby, where there was nothing to see but the little numbered doors of the boxes. They were alone in the lamplit bareness; the
finale
of the act was ringing and booming behind them. In a moment she said: I'm afraid I must trouble you to put me into a cab.
Ah, you won't see the rest?
Do
staywhat difference does it make? And her companion still held open the door of the box. Her eyes met his, in which it seemed to her that as well as in his voice there was conscious sympathy, entreaty, vindication, tenderness. Then she gazed into the vulgar corridor again; something said to her that if she should return she would be taking the most important step of her life. She considered this, and while she did so a great burst of applause filled the place as the curtain fell. See what we are losing! And the last act is so fine, said Mr. Wendover. She returned to her seat and he closed the door of the box behind them.
Then, in this little upholstered receptacle which was so public and yet so private, Laura Wing passed through the strangest moments she had known. An indication of their strangeness is that when she presently perceived that while she was in the lobby Lady Ringrose and her companion had quite disappeared, she observed the circumstance without an exclamation, holding herself silent. Their box was empty, but Laura
 
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looked at it without in the least feeling this to be a sign that Selina would now come round. She would never come round again, nor would she have gone home from the opera. That was by this time absolutely definite to the girl, who had first been hot and now was cold with the sense of what Selina's injunction to poor Mr. Booker exactly meant. It was worthy of her, for it was simply a vicious little kick as she took her flight. Grosvenor Place would not shelter her that night and would never shelter her more: that was the reason she tried to spatter her sister with the mud into which she herself had jumped. She would not have dared to treat her in such a fashion if they had had a prospect of meeting again. The strangest part of this remarkable juncture was that what ministered most to our young lady's suppressed emotion was not the tremendous reflection that this time Selina had really bolted and that on the morrow all London would know it: all that had taken the glare of certainty (and a very hideous hue it was), whereas the chill that had fallen upon the girl now was that of a mystery which waited to be cleared up. Her heart was full of suspensesuspense of which she returned the pressure, trying to twist it into expectation. There was a certain chance in life that sat there beside her, but it would go for ever if it should not move nearer that night; and she listened, she watched, for it to move. I need not inform the reader that this chance presented itself in the person of Mr. Wendover, who more than any one she knew had it in his hand to transmute her detestable position. To-morrow he would know, and would think sufficiently little of a young person of
that
breed: therefore it could only be a question of his speaking on the spot. That was what she had come back into the box forto give him his opportunity. It was open to her to think he had asked for itadding everything together.
The poor girl added, added, deep in her heart, while she said nothing. The music was not there now, to keep them silent; yet he remained quiet, even as she did, and that for some minutes was a part of her addition. She felt as if she were running a race with failure and shame; she would get in first if she should get in before the degradation of the morrow. But this was not very far off, and every minute brought it nearer. It would be there in fact, virtually, that night, if Mr.
 
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Wendover should begin to realise the brutality of Selina's not turning up at all. The comfort had been, hitherto, that he didn't realise brutalities. There were certain violins that emitted tentative sounds in the orchestra; they shortened the time and made her uneasierfixed her idea that he could lift her out of her mire if he would. It didn't appear to prove that he would, his also observing Lady Ringrose's empty box without making an encouraging comment upon it. Laura waited for him to remark that her sister obviously would turn up now; but no such words fell from his lips. He must either like Selina's being away or judge it damningly, and in either case why didn't he speak? If he had nothing to say, why
had
he said, why had he done, what did he mean? But the girl's inward challenge to him lost itself in a mist of faintness; she was screwing herself up to a purpose of her own, and it hurt almost to anguish, and the whole place, around her, was a blur and swim, through which she heard the tuning of fiddles. Before she knew it she had said to him, Why have you come so often?
So often? To see you, do you mean?
To see
me
it was for that? Why have you come? she went on. He was evidently surprised, and his surprise gave her a point of anger, a desire almost that her words should hurt him, lash him. She spoke low, but she heard herself, and she thought that if what she said sounded to
him
in the same way! You have come very oftentoo often, too often!
He coloured, he looked frightened, he was, clearly, extremely startled. Why, you have been so kind, so delightful, he stammered.
Yes, of course, and so have you! Did you come for Selina? She is married, you know, and devoted to her husband. A single minute had sufficed to show the girl that her companion was quite unprepared for her question, that he was distinctly not in love with her and was face to face with a situation entirely new. The effect of this perception was to make her say wilder things.
Why, what is more natural, when one likes people, than to come often? Perhaps I have bored youwith our American way, said Mr. Wendover.
And is it because you like me that you have kept me here?
 
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Laura asked. She got up, leaning against the side of the box; she had pulled the curtain far forward and was out of sight of the house.
He rose, but more slowly; he had got over his first confusion. He smiled at her, but his smile was dreadful. Can you have any doubt as to what I have come for? It's a pleasure to me that you have liked me well enough to ask.
For an instant she thought he was coming nearer to her, but he didn't: he stood there twirling his gloves. Then an unspeakable shame and horrorhorror of herself, of him, of everythingcame over her, and she sank into a chair at the back of the box, with averted eyes, trying to get further into her corner. Leave me, leave me, go away! she said, in the lowest tone that he could hear. The whole house seemed to her to be listening to her, pressing into the box.
Leave you alonein this placewhen I love you? I can't do thatindeed I can't.
You don't love meand you torture me by staying! Laura went on, in a convulsed voice. For God's sake go away and don't speak to me, don't let me see you or hear of you again!
Mr. Wendover still stood there, exceedingly agitated, as well he might be, by this inconceivable scene. Unaccustomed feelings possessed him and they moved him in different directions. Her command that he should take himself off was passionate, yet he attempted to resist, to speak. How would she get homewould she see him to-morrowwould she let him wait for her outside? To this Laura only replied: Oh dear, oh dear, if you would only go! and at the same instant she sprang up, gathering her cloak around her as if to escape from him, to rush away herself. He checked this movement, however, clapping on his hat and holding the door. One moment more he looked at herher own eyes were closed; then he exclaimed, pitifully, Oh Miss Wing, oh Miss Wing! and stepped out of the box.
When he had gone she collapsed into one of the chairs again and sat there with her face buried in a fold of her mantle. For many minutes she was perfectly stillshe was ashamed even to move. The one thing that could have justified her, blown away the dishonour of her monstrous overture, would have been, on his side, the quick response of unmistakable

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