Her Favorite Rival (28 page)

He took a breath, opened his mouth... And caught himself in the split second before he let his past bleed irrevocably into his present.

Audrey did not need to know about his mother. She didn’t need to be a party to the ugliness of his childhood or the reality of his mother’s addiction. There was nothing she could do or say that would undo what had happened or what would inevitably happen in the future. Which meant there was no reason to burden her with it.

No reason at all.

It was enough that he was here, with her, that this was the memory he would take to bed with him, not the one where his mother was in a hospital bed, her body reduced to a sinewy husk by her disease.

“Do you want to come to bed?” Audrey asked after a while.

“I should probably go,” he said reluctantly.

“You’re welcome to stay.”

He pressed a kiss against the place where her shoulder joined her neck. “Thanks, but I didn’t bring any stuff with me.”

“Oh. Okay.”

He liked that she sounded a little disappointed. The truth was, he’d debated dropping past his place en route from the hospital but he hadn’t wanted to assume anything.

They levered themselves up off the couch and spent the next few minutes collecting their scattered clothes. He threw her an assessing look as he pulled on his trousers. He wanted to see her again, soon, and he wanted to nail down when that might be, even though he was aware he risked looking more than a little desperate.

“Are you busy on the weekend?” he asked.

“I have dinner with my sister tomorrow night. Other than that, I don’t have any plans.”

“Can I pencil in Saturday?”

“You can. Can I pencil in Sunday?”

He grinned. “Deal.”

She saw him to the door wearing nothing but her bra and panties. He raked her with a look, shaking his head in disbelief at himself.

“I can’t believe I’m actually walking out the door right now,” he said.

“You must be insane.”

“I think you’re right. Deranged in the extreme.”

Because he couldn’t resist, he lowered his head and tongued her nipple through the silk of her bra. She made a small sound, her hand slipping around to grip the nape of his neck.

After a moment he lifted his head. “Sweet dreams.”

“As if I’m going to slip peacefully into sleep after
that
.”

He was still smiling when he exited the building and unlocked his car. One day, he needed to thank Gary for pairing him with Audrey for the report.

Luckiest day of his life.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

“
I
’
VE
BEEN
THINKING
,” Megan said.

Audrey glanced up from the catalog page she’d been proofing—even though what she’d really been doing was thinking about Zach—to find her friend propped in her office doorway.

“Yes?”

“Yes. And the conclusion I’ve come to is that you should ask Zach out.”

Audrey stared at Megan. Was she messing with her head? Had she guessed that she and Zach were conducting an under-the-radar relationship? Had they been
that
obvious already?

“I’m not sure I agree with you,” she said, because that was what she normally said in these sorts of conversations.

She’d done her damnedest to keep her face poker-straight whenever she was around Zach. This morning, she’d had the most inane conversation with him in the staff room while Megan hovered in front of the fridge. Sure, she’d been remembering what his clever hands had done to her last night the whole time, but she was almost certain she hadn’t given anything away.

She hoped.

“I really think you should give him a chance. I know you were pissed about the whole giving-the-report-to-Whitman thing, but I think he’s a good guy. I like him,” Megan said.

Audrey opened her mouth to say something, then shut it again. What could she say that wouldn’t be an out-and-out lie? She didn’t want to deceive her friend. But she also wasn’t even close to being ready to go public with what was happening between her and Zach. It had been
three days,
after all.

“He is a good guy,” she finally settled for saying.

Megan clapped her hands together and made a “gotcha” noise.

“You
do
like him. I
knew
it. I knew you wouldn’t be able to hold out forever.”

Audrey fought the need to squirm in her chair. She felt like such a liar, liar pants on fire.

“How did it go with that missing order?” she asked, desperate to change the subject. “Did it turn up?”

Megan’s smile faded as she shook her head. “No. Sometimes, I want to go out to that warehouse and crack their heads together like coconuts. How hard is it to lose ten pallets of grass seed? Pretty hard, from where I’m sitting. But not for them.”

Lucy appeared at Megan’s side “Hey. Want some apple cinnamon tea cake? Jen made it.”

She offered the plate to Megan, along with a napkin. Audrey was about to pass with a thank-you when she saw her friend’s face.

“Are you all right?”

Megan was white, with a definite hint of green. “I think I’m going to throw up.”

Pushing her way past Lucy, she broke into a jog as she headed for the ladies’ room. Audrey was frozen in shock for a full second before she got herself together and went after her.

The first thing she heard when she entered the washroom was the sound of her friend retching in one of the cubicles.

“You okay?” she called.

“What do you think?” Megan’s tone was anguished.

“Okay, that was a dumb question. Is there anything I can do?”

“A glass of water would be good.”

“Water. Right.”

Audrey exited the restroom and grabbed a plastic cup from the dispenser next to the nearby water cooler, filling the cup to the brim.

All was quiet when she returned to the bathroom.

“I have water.”

“Thanks.”

The cubicle door opened and Megan looked at her, her expression miserable. “I really hate throwing up.”

“I don’t think there are many actual, card-carrying, diehard fans of regurgitation,” Audrey said as she handed over the water.

She waited until Megan had rinsed her mouth a few times before voicing the thought at top of her mind.

“So. When was the last time you did a pregnancy test?”

“I had my period a couple of weeks ago. I’m not pregnant.”

“Except you’ve been eating enough for a small island state and now you’ve tossed your cookies.”

Megan frowned.

“I’m going up the road to the pharmacy,” Audrey said, very firm.

“It’s a waste of time,” Megan said, but there was a lack of conviction in her tone.

Since it was nearly lunchtime, Audrey didn’t feel even remotely guilty as she ducked up the road to grab a pregnancy test. She chose one with two tests in one box. If what she suspected was right, Megan might need some convincing.

Audrey understood her friend’s refusal to allow herself to get her hopes up, but there was cautious, then there was crazy.

Megan was in her office when she returned and Audrey tossed the bag across the desk to her.

“Go do your thing, puke girl.”

“Puke girl. That’s lovely.” But Megan was smiling faintly as they walked together to the restroom.

Five minutes later they were both staring at the twin blue lines on the test strip.

“But I just had my period. There’s no way these things are sensitive enough to pick up a two-week-old pregnancy.”

“What if that last period wasn’t really a period? That happens. I’ve read about it in a magazine or something.”

“You mean it was a bleed?” Megan’s voice trembled with worry. Megan had lost one pregnancy, so Audrey knew that it was going to be hard for her friend to wholeheartedly embrace the news she’d received.

“I’m not a doctor. Let’s make you an appointment. And maybe you should call Tim. Tell him there’s a good chance he’s going to be a daddy.”

Megan stared at her. Then a slow smile curved her mouth. She pressed her fingers against her lips. Audrey wrapped her in a hug.

“Told you you’d get there, puke girl.”

Megan thumped a fist on her back. “Stop calling me that or I’ll come up with a worse nickname for you.”

“I dare you.”

Megan took the rest of the day as a sick day and raced off to the doctor, calling at three to confirm the diagnosis. She was so happy, Audrey felt a twinge of guilt that she was holding back her own good news from her best friend. She and Megan had shared their hopes and dreams and fears for a long time now. It felt sneaky not to let her in on what was going on.

But if things didn’t work out with Zach, she would feel like such an idiot. And she didn’t want Megan feeling obliged to keep a secret on their behalf, even though the odds were good she’d revel in the subterfuge.

She made a deal with herself as she ended the call—the moment she was confident things with Zach were solid, she’d come clean to Megan.

As for telling the rest of the office...she wasn’t sure. But she knew it was unrealistic and unhealthy to try to keep their thing under wraps for too long.

Just until I’m sure. Or as sure as I can be,
she promised herself.
Until things settle down at work.

Even though her desk was heaving with work, she left earlier than usual to go home and change before driving into the city for dinner with her sister. One of Leah’s colleagues had recommended Chin Chin as a great place to eat and they’d agreed to meet there at seven.

Audrey showered and dressed in jeans and a cowl-necked sweater, then changed her mind and pulled a black wrap dress out of her closet. She was staring unhappily at her reflection in the mirror on the back of her bedroom door when she caught sight of her bedside clock in the mirror.

She was going to be late if she didn’t hustle.

Shaking her head at her own stupidity, she pulled on black knee-high boots and dropped a string of colorful beads over her head for a little brightness. Then she forced herself to leave, before her nerves could inspire another wardrobe change.

It was crazy to be nervous about having dinner with her own sister. This was Leah, after all. Conservative, top-of-the-class Leah who always said and did the right thing. She probably wanted to talk about what to buy their parents for Christmas. Or maybe she was feeling nostalgic or something.

Not that there was much to be nostalgic about in their shared childhood. Not from Audrey’s point of view, anyway. But maybe Leah saw things differently. Maybe she had much fonder memories of it all than Audrey did.

She tried to shake off her trepidation as she walked the block from the parking garage to the restaurant, but her breath got caught somewhere between her lungs and mouth when she spotted her sister waiting for her out in front of the restaurant. Dressed in creased linen pants with an equally creased linen shirt, Leah looked pale and uneasy.

“Hey. I forgot to mention to you that this place doesn’t take bookings. I’ve put our name down for a table and they’ll text me when it’s ready. We can have a few drinks in the bar while we wait,” Leah said, her delivery rapid-fire, her movements jerky.

“Okay. Sure.” Audrey studied her sister out of the corner of her eye as they made their way downstairs to the dim bar. She couldn’t decide if her sister was as nervous as she was or wired on caffeine and stress.

They were shown to an alcove with upholstered banquette seating and handed a fan of menus. Wine, bar food, cocktails.

“You want a drink? My friend at work said the cocktails here are really good. I’m going to have one. You should, too. I know you’re driving, but you can have a couple without it being a problem. Trust me, I’m a doctor.” Leah laughed a little too loudly.

“I’m up for a drink.” Audrey breathed in through her nose, trying to calm her suddenly racing heart. Why did she feel as though something bad was about to happen?

They were both silent for a moment as they scanned the cocktail menu, the groovy vibes emanating from the speakers doing nothing to relieve the tension. When the waitress came, they both ordered a lemon fizz.

They made small talk until their drinks came. And all the while Audrey wondered why they were there.

Leah swallowed nervously once the waitress had delivered their drinks, the sound audible in the pause between tracks. “You’re probably wondering why I asked you here tonight,” she said. Then she laughed awkwardly. “I sound like I’m in an Agatha Christie movie, don’t I?
And the murderer is...
”

The table was trembling and it took Audrey a moment to work out it that was because her sister’s leg was jiggling nonstop underneath.

“Leah. Whatever you’ve got to say, spit it out. The waiting is killing me,” Audrey said.

Leah stilled. Then she nodded. “Okay. How about this? I’m really sorry for being such a shitty sister.”

Audrey stared at her. Not what she’d expected. By a long shot.

“I have no idea what to say to that, Leah. Except you haven’t been a crappy sister, obviously. I know we’re not the closest, but it takes two to tango, right? And you have every right to be a little wary of me given some of the things I did when we were younger.”

Like breaking into her parents’ house when she was seventeen and living on the streets, raiding every possible source of ready cash that she could get her hands on—including her sister’s piggy bank and portable CD player, which she’d promptly sold at the nearest secondhand shop.

She’d apologized to Leah when she’d finally given up her wild bid for freedom and come home a year later, but her sister hadn’t looked her in the eye for months afterward.

“Don’t let me off the hook, Audrey. I need to say this. I’ve been wanting to say this for years, but I always felt as though it would be a betrayal of Mum and Dad and they’ve always been so good to me... Which is the point, actually.” Leah took a big swallow from her drink. “I’m just going to say it, put it right out there—I was the favorite. Hell, I still am. And I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy being the golden child, able to do no wrong. Who doesn’t want to be the best, the favored one, right?”