Her Pregnancy Surprise (39 page)

She heard the perplexity in Dex’s voice.

“I guess that applies to me as well,” she said. “Thanks for the info.”

Why hadn’t Matt come home?

The weekend proved lonely. Sara cleaned, did laundry and shopped for groceries. She slept when she could. Napping helped pass the time, however, then
she wasn’t sleepy at bedtime. She tossed and turned, trying to rest, but worrying far into the night.

She checked the answering machine a dozen times a day in case he called. Nothing.

She baked cookies on Sunday afternoon, not wanting to be far from the phone. She was getting worried now about a possible accident. Surely someone would have notified her if that was the case, but what if he’d been mugged and injured with no identification?

The scenario that played itself out the most, however, was his walking away to a new life. He hadn’t bargained for a baby. Hadn’t been thrilled with the news when she’d told him.

When the phone rang, she ran for it.

“Hello?”

“It’s Dex, heard from Matt yet?”

“No.” Disappointment washed through her.

“I spoke with one of the managers at the bank in Brussels early this morning. He drove Matt to the airport himself on Wednesday afternoon. He should have landed in New York Wednesday evening. I’ve got people checking in New York in case there was an accident or something.”

“Thanks, Dex. Um, would he have gone somewhere else? Instead of coming home, I mean. Was there another problem or something he might have gone to check out?”

“Not that I know about. Tony is working on it as well. We’ll find him, Sara.”

“If he wants to be found,” she murmured.

“What?”

“Nothing. I appreciate your letting me know. I’ll call you if he calls here.”

She hung up and sat back on the chair. Granted she
hadn’t known Matt long, but he was too honorable to just disappear. He wouldn’t leave his friends and partners in the lurch. Nor was he the type to walk away without a word to her. He’d tell her to her face the marriage wasn’t what he wanted and ask her to leave.

She glanced around. She’d never felt fully comfortable in the apartment. Or was it she never felt fully comfortable in the marriage? She and Bill had been sweethearts for years, yet he’d run out on her without a qualm. How much easier would it be for Matt to leave without the years of shared experiences to bind them together?

By Monday morning Sara was furious. Matt had better have a whale of an excuse for not calling and letting her know where he was. She would not be treated like this. Either he keep her informed where he was when he traveled, or she would end their short-lived marriage.

When she reached work, she discovered her secretary was out sick—just when she needed her most in order to wind up some matters in preparation for her leave of absence.

Sara began to jot down notes for the different accountants who would pick up portions of her workload while she was gone. She wished Stacy had been in, it would have made the day go easier.

As she worked her way steadily through the accounts, she began to wonder if she should bother. If she and Matt were not going to stay together, then there was no reason to take a leave of absence. In fact, she needed to work as much as she could in order to have some money saved for the first few months of the baby’s life when she wouldn’t work.

The thought of being a solo parent again tore at
her heart. She knew Amber had missed a lot with no man in her life as a child. If only her parents had been more forgiving, or Bill had at least kept in touch.

Would Matt want anything to do with his son or daughter? Or would he be too busy saving the computers of the world to worry about the child he’d help create?

The phone rang. Hope instantly rose.

“Sara?” It was Dex.

“Yes?”

“We heard from Matt. Actually, we heard last Thursday, but we had a temporary clerical worker who took the message and it got buried in some other paperwork. He said he had some personal business to take care of and he’d call. Told her to let his wife know. I guess he thought she’d find someone to relay the message, but she apparently just jotted it on a slip of paper and forgot about it.”

“That’s all, some personal business?”

“So he said.”

“Like what?”

“I haven’t a clue.” Dex hesitated a moment. “You know his uncle is dead. He has no other family he keeps in contact with, so I’m not sure what he meant. It was our screwup, sorry for all the worry on your end.”

“At least he wasn’t in an accident.”

“He should have called you directly,” Dex said.

“Maybe he was short on time.” She would not reveal the difficulties they were facing to Dex, no matter how close he was to Matt.

“If he calls again, we’ll let you know right away. Sorry for the delay.”

So Matt had at least tried to reassure her about his
delay. Not that taking care of personal business meant much. And where was he that he couldn’t use his phone? He’d made a big deal of her carrying a cell phone. He could have called.

All worry now turned to anger. How dare he put her through so much for naught. If he wanted to try for the long haul, they really did need to sit down and talk—and one of the first things she would demand is he keep in contact!

She took a quick lunch, then distributed the folders and notes she’d made all morning. Her desk was the cleanest it had ever been. Some of her co-workers commented on her plans, wishing they could take time off to visit some of the world’s capitals. She smiled, trying to maintain a calm demeanor when her stomach was in turmoil and her anger was barely kept in check.

When the phone rang around three, she picked up, wishing again Stacy had not been out ill today.

“Mom?” It was Amber, and she sounded as if she were crying.

“Yes, honey. What is it?” Had she failed an exam?

“Mom, can you come? Jimmy’s dead.”

S
ARA
willed the taxi to go faster, even though traffic was heavy. She knew the driver was doing his best, but her child needed her and she wanted to be there instantly.

Jimmy dead, how could that be? He was only twenty-one years old. He had his whole life ahead of him. Only, apparently no longer. Amber must be devastated. Sara wanted to push against the seat in front of her in hopes of pushing the cab to go faster, to get to her daughter.

Endless minutes later the cab pulled in front of Amber’s apartment building, an older one near the university. Sara flung some money his way and dashed out and into the building.

Seconds later she knocked on the door.

Amber threw it open, tears tracking down her cheeks.

Sara was vaguely aware of two men who rose when she entered, but her concern was for her daughter. She took Amber into her arms, holding her tightly, feeling her own tears come.

“What happened?” she asked, as Amber sobbed against her shoulder.

“He was killed,” she wailed, sobbing harder.

“Ma’am,” one of the men said.

Sara looked over, recognizing the Army uniform.

“I’m sorry we had to bring such bad news,” he said.

He hardly looked old enough to wear the double bars on his shoulder.

“What happened?” she asked them, holding her daughter tightly.

“Woodworth’s platoon was rotated into an incursion sector. He and three others were killed when the vehicle they were riding in was hit by a missile. His body is being sent home for burial. It’ll be here in two days.” He held out a manila envelope.

“He was stationed in Germany, there’s no fighting in Germany,” Sara said, stunned anew by the news. Trying to take it in.

“No, ma’am. But he wasn’t in Germany. His platoon was sent to an area of conflict, they had just arrived when the attack happened.”

He offered the manila envelop again. “This has all the information we have, arrival time of the body, who to contact to coordinate the funeral. Insurance matters. Who to contact with any questions you have that we can’t answer.”

She reached for it, and nodded, brushing her own tears away with the back of her hand. She couldn’t let Amber go long enough to do much more. Her heart ached for her baby girl. She and Jimmy hadn’t been married three months!

“If there’s nothing else?” the man asked.

There were a million questions—how had he died? Why? What was her daughter to do with the rest of her life? Who sent mere boys into armed conflicts? How could any of this be happening?

But the man in uniform wouldn’t have the answers.

“No.”

“Our sincerest condolences,” he said formally.

When they’d left, Sara moved with Amber to the sofa.

“Oh, Mom, I can’t believe it. He’s never going to come home. We’re never going to build a life together, go to school, get a house. I’d even go with him in the military if he’d been here,” she cried, clutching Sara as if she could never let go.

“I know honey. I know.” She felt inadequate to deal with all this. What would they do? She wished Matt were with her. He might have some suggestions. If nothing else, he would offer support. She needed someone to lean on.

“The Woodworth’s need to be told. The Army notified me as next of kin. They have to know. Poor Virginia. She dotes on Jimmy. Doted,” Amber said, tears streaming down her cheeks.

Sara’s tears welled again. Amber obviously couldn’t tell them. She’d have to. Was there anything worse than a mother losing a child? Jimmy was the only child Virginia and James had. This would be devastating news. Sara instinctively rested her hand on her swelling stomach.

“I’ll call her now. She needs to know,” Sara said.

Amber told her where the phone number was, and Sara went to dial, remembering Jimmy coming over after school to see Amber. Remembering the times they’d fought and made up. Remembered the plans they’d made, and the small wedding they’d had so recently. He had been far too young to die. And Amber was much too young to be a widow. They should have had their entire lives ahead of them.

Sara asked to speak to James when Virginia answered. He wasn’t home Virginia replied. Sara couldn’t think for a moment, then said she had a tax
question for him, unwilling to give Virginia the news when she was home alone. She asked him to call as soon as he came in.

Then she went to prepare hot, sweet tea for herself and Amber. There would be so much to do over the next few days. But first, the initial shock needed to be dealt with.

Amber stopped crying, listlessly accepting the tea when it was ready.

“I don’t know what to do,” she said.

“We’ll take it one step at a time. The Woodworths will want to be involved in the funeral plans, so we’ll wait until they know before planning anything.”

“I talked to him last week, when I was in the midst of taking finals. He said they were going somewhere for a few weeks, but not that it was a dangerous place.”

“He probably didn’t want to worry you,” Sara said, wishing more than ever that Matt was here to help her deal with this. She ached for her daughter and the Woodworths.

“He didn’t even ask after my finals,” Amber said. “I had to tell him I was taking them. It seems so petty now, but I was upset my finals weren’t as important to him as going to his next assignment.” She started to cry again.

“Honey, he was a man, doing a man’s job. He was focused on that. You were important to him. He loved you for a long time. Always remember that.”

“The call was too short,” Amber mumbled.

“If he’d known he wasn’t going to get another chance to call, I’m sure he’d have stayed on the line for hours,” Sara said gently. There was something to be said for not knowing when the end was coming.

“Maybe. But I don’t know how I feel. Not very married. We only had a few nights together, you know. He was on base almost the entire time he was here. We never got to be husband and wife, shopping, doing things together. We were going to do all that when he got back. Now we never will.”

“I know. I’m so sorry, sweetie.” Sara would do anything to ease the pain her daughter was going through.

Amber rose and paced the small room. Her hand went to her stomach and rubbed gently. “What am I going to do?”

Sara stared at her. “Oh, God, Amber, are you
pregnant?
”

Matt opened the apartment. He was dog-tired, but more convinced of what he needed to do than he’d been in a long time. It wouldn’t be easy, but he had no other choice.

“Sara?”

The quiet in the apartment indicated he was alone. He’d called from the airport, but no one had seen her in the office since about noon, and her secretary was out sick.

He took his suitcase into the bedroom. She was not napping in their bed, which is what he’d been hoping for.

Taking a quick shower to freshen up, he dressed casually and went back into the livingroom. There was no note. Of course not, she hadn’t known he was coming home today. Hadn’t even gotten his message about his visit to Sambo until this morning.

Dex had apologized a dozen times, but it didn’t
make it easier. What had Sara thought when she hadn’t heard from him in days?

If Sambo hadn’t lived in the hills of Virginia, he could have used his cell and called out after that thunderstorm had knocked out the power and phone lines. The flash floods had made roads impassable for days. It had taken the local phone company until last night to get telephone service restored. He’d stayed as long as he could to help clear the roads, worked with the small town in getting its computers back up once power was back and retrieving as much data as he could from the damaged machines. Lightening and computers should never mix.

He’d thought Sara knew he was fine. Instead, she must have been sick with worry when she hadn’t heard from him in a week.

“So where is she now?” he said aloud, dialing her office again.

No luck. No one knew where she was.

He tried Dex again, but he hadn’t heard from Sara since that morning.

He dialed Amber’s number, but only got the answering machine.

Who were Sara’s friends? She’d spoken about an Abbie and a Marian, but he couldn’t remember their last names. Rummaging around her things, he didn’t find an address book. Probably still at her old apartment.

He saw the lease to the apartment they had picked together. He needed to talk to her about that. He should have done so already, but he’d been running scared.

Hell of a thing for a man to admit. The thought of
a baby had scared the life out of him. He wasn’t father material, had never pictured himself as a father.

He tried Amber’s place again. The phone rang until the machine picked up. He left a brief message and hung up. Nothing to do but wait.

And waiting was never something he was good at.

He went through the mail, keeping an eye on the phone as if that would help it ring. He got something to eat, and fixed a huge pot of coffee. He was tired, but nothing he couldn’t handle. Flying in from the East Coast wasn’t like coming home from Europe.

It was after seven when he tried Amber’s phone again. Still no answer.

Impatient and worried, he headed out. He’d swing by Sara’s old apartment. Maybe she was packing. Though he doubted it. Without the new apartment confirmed, Sara probably had given up on the move.

For a moment he wondered if she’d given up on him and moved back to her old place.

He drove the few blocks and was startled to see the lights on. He hadn’t truly expected that.

Finding a parking place proved almost impossible. He was tempted to leave the car in the middle of the road and run up to her apartment, demanding to know why she was there instead of their place.

He found a spot about two blocks away. The walk back did nothing but fuel his anger. He’d been waiting for hours, had she been here at her place all along? What was she doing?

He knocked on the door, annoyed she hadn’t even given him a key to her place. Her old place, he corrected himself.

Sara opened the door, shocked to see him. But it was nothing to the shock he experienced seeing her.

“Sara! What’s wrong?”

She looked awful. Her eyes were swollen, and blotchy. She didn’t have on a speck of make up, and her hair was pulled back as if to keep it out of her face with no regard for style.

“Matt? What are you doing here?”

“I came for you.”

“Oh, Matt, Jimmy’s dead.” She burst into tears.

He stepped inside and drew her into his arms. “Oh, Sara. I didn’t know. When did it happen? I would have come instantly if I’d known.”

“You’re here now, that’s good,” she said, leaning against him. “We just found out this afternoon. It’s so awful.”

He turned her slightly and picked her up, carrying her to the sofa where he sat with her in his lap.

“Tell me,” he urged, holding her close.

“Amber is asleep at last. We came home because—” She stopped and looked at him, her eyes full of worry and sadness.

“Because this is your home, yours and Amber’s. And comfort is what she needs now,” he said. His place had never been hers. Would never be hers. He knew that now.

She nodded, her tears slowing.

“I didn’t know you were back,” she said, leaning her head against his shoulder wearily.

“I got in this afternoon. I tried calling you at work, but you weren’t there.”

“I found out about three. I went to Amber’s apartment, but we didn’t want to stay there. The Woodworths were devastated. I had to tell James. The Army notified Amber. I knew they would be heart-broken.
How horrible is it to lose a child? I don’t know how Virginia will bear it.”

“What happened?” Three o’clock? He’d been at the apartment by four o’clock. He could have been with her all these hours.

He listened while Sara disjointedly told him what she knew. He didn’t fully understand where Jimmy had been, but did it matter? The fact was the young man was dead and Matt’s stepdaughter a widow at nineteen. Jimmy’s parents had lost their only child. His wife was distraught, which couldn’t be good for her or the baby.

And he hadn’t been there when she’d needed him most.

She pushed back. “I need to wash my face—again.” She rose and went down the short hall to the bathroom. He heard the water running. Feeling frustrated, he rose and went to the kitchen. The tea kettle was on the stove. Cups were in the sink. Remnants of a meal were still on the counter, little eaten.

He began to clear off the dishes, stacking them in the sink, putting away the food. He heard her join him. She’d pulled a sweatshirt over her clothes. Probably for the residual shock since it was not particularly cool in the apartment.

“I can do those,” she said dully.

“I can manage. Sit and talk to me. Tell me what you’ve decided for the funeral.”

She looked at him, a flare of anger showing.

“Where have you been? I’ve been out of my mind with worry, no word from you in a week. We didn’t exactly end on a pleasant note in our last call—which by the way was initiated from me. Would you ever have called?”

“I would have,” he said quietly. He turned off the water and turned to face her, leaning against the counter.

“When? How dare you waltz back in as if you’d only gone to the store.”

“I had some things to see to. I wanted to…”

“Mom?” Amber appeared in the door. “Oh, hi Matt. I guess you heard?” she asked.

“I’m so sorry, Amber,” he said, taking in her appearance. Gone was the vibrant happy young woman he was used to seeing. Her eyes were dulled from tears. She moved as if she were eighty instead of almost twenty.

“Yeah, me, too.” She went to sit beside Sara.

“Can’t sleep?” Sara asked.

She shook her head.

“Want me to warm up this food?” Matt asked. He wasn’t sure what to do with two weepy females, but he’d try something. He hadn’t known Jimmy well, but he couldn’t believe the young man was dead.

She shook her head. “I don’t want anything but to be with Mom.”

Sara reached out and brushed her fingers against Amber’s cheek. “It’ll get better with time, honey. I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but it will. I promise.”