Her Rebel Heart (10 page)

Read Her Rebel Heart Online

Authors: Shannon Farrington

He shook his head. She had no idea what their life was like. He could not blame her for that. He had no idea, either, until recently.

"€œJulia, it is against the law to teach a slave to read."€

Her eyes narrowed. "€œTruly?"€

"€œYes."€

"€œThat makes no sense at all,"€ she said. "€œWould they not be better workers if they were literate? Could they not make deliveries with more ease if they could read the street signs and notices?"€

"€œIt isn'€™t about
their
ease."€

She looked hurt. He hadn'€™t meant to discourage her; he simply wanted her to understand. Sam hoped to give her an idea of what life was like for Elijah and Elisha but he had to choose his examples carefully. Slavery was a brutal institution. No lady should be subjected to such horrible details.

"€œYour idea is a noble one,"€ he said. "€œAnd I, more than anyone, would like to deliver the basket to them but'€¦"€ He paused, searching.

"€œBut what?"€

"€œIn all likelihood, their master won'€™t allow it."€

"€œWhy? What harm is there in tea cakes and Scripture?"€

"€œIt is a matter of control. If a slave is kept illiterate, unable to know of the value the Savior places on his life, then that slave will never rebel."€

"€œRebel?"€

"€œFreedom and for that matter, love, is an unquench
able desire. Once you have a taste of it, you thirst for more."€

She suddenly looked very uncomfortable. Avoiding his eyes, she started stacking the tin cups in the box, ready to take them to the pump for a washing.

Sam hadn'€™t intentionally meant to draw a parallel between the children'€™s relationship with God and their engagement. It just happened.

"€œTry not to be discouraged,"€ he said, steering the discussion back to its proper course. "€œPerhaps the Lord will give us other opportunities to show Elijah and Elisha kindness. Perhaps they will pass this way tomorrow."€

She nodded contemplatively, though still avoiding his eyes. "€œI suppose I should return the second basket to Widow Crowley."€

"€œKeep it,"€ he said. "€œThe Lord may yet have plans for it."€


When the water barrels and cups had been cared for, Julia found her parents and explained where she was headed.

"€œAnd Sam will escort you?"€ her father asked.

"€œYes."€

She did not like the idea of spending so much time with Samuel. His presence confused her. His lack of support for her family still angered her but there were moments when his smile erased all memory of such things. Personal interaction aside, she wanted to deliver the basket, even if she could not minister to Elijah and Elisha directly.

Perhaps by being kind to their employer, God will pass a blessing on to them.

She rejoined Samuel on the sidewalk in front of the church. He carried a basket in each arm.

"€œI should have brought my carriage today,"€ he said. "€œI am sorry this will be a long walk."€

She had retrieved her parasol from her father'€™s carriage before he and her mother left to make a delivery of their own.

"€œThat is all right. It is a pleasant afternoon."€

Although she was hesitant about being in Samuel'€™s continued company, in truth, she was eager for the opportunity to stroll. She missed doing so. The occupying army had put an end to her carefree outings.

"€œWe should pray before we start,"€ he said.

"€œIndeed."€

He set the baskets on the ground then reached for her hands. He had often done so when they were engaged to be married. Julia thought of the warmth in his touch but did not give in to the memory. She kept her hands tightly about her parasol. Samuel pulled back and closed his eyes.

"€œLord, may we be Your ambassadors of goodwill today. May our words and deeds soften hearts in the dry goods store. May this man be sympathetic to Elijah and Elisha'€™s needs. May his heart become in tune with that which pleases You."€

She, of course, hoped for the salvation of the shopkeeper but she had trouble believing what Samuel had said earlier concerning slaves and masters. She doubted if the law excluding them from being taught to read and write was really a matter of control.

Surely his abolitionist friends are provoking hysteria. The masters probably don'€™t want their slaves studying the alphabet during working hours. It is simply a matter of an honest day'€™s work.

They started in the direction of the harbor. A sense of uneasiness dogged her heels. It was the first time she
had traveled that way since the day of the riot. Walking along, she tried to focus her attention on the store windows and street vendors, not on the recent history of the city or the man who was escorting her.

Thankfully, Samuel kept their conversation confined to their mission.

"€œI believe we should tell the proprietor where we are from and then say we would like to give him a gift. What do you think?"€

Truth be told, she wasn'€™t really thinking of the impending conversational exchange. She was still hoping to catch a glimpse of Elijah and Elisha.

"€œWhatever you think is best,"€ she said.

The rumble of cartwheels and clanging of ships'€™ bells could be heard as they neared the Baltimore harbor. The smell of fish and burning coal filled the air. The dry goods store was located in the last row of shops before the wharf.

"€œHere now,"€ Julia said when they reached their destination. "€œLet me carry the second basket while you speak with the man."€

Samuel thanked her then opened the door. A bell on the back of the glass signaled their arrival. Julia closed her parasol as they stepped inside. The odor of the sea mingled with the scent of the earth. Large, open barrels of oatmeal, corn and dried beans lined the walls.

A middle-aged man wearing a sack coat and apron stood behind the counter. He smiled and addressed Samuel.

"€œA good afternoon to you, sir. How may I serve you?"€

Samuel moved forward. Julia followed a step behind discreetly surveying her surroundings. Her heart beat with anticipation. Were the children here?

Samuel explained the reason they had come. The
merchant seemed pleasantly surprised. He nodded to Julia. She smiled in return.

"€œYou say you are from the church on Charles Street?"€ the man asked Samuel.

"€œYes. Just a few blocks north of here."€

From the corner of her eye Julia spied movement. At the far end of the room little Elisha appeared, broom in hand. His eyes widened as he recognized her.

Julia smiled and shifted the basket from one hand to the other.
It is the perfect opportunity,
she thought.
The businessman is pleasant enough, surely he won'€™t object to a little kindness on the children'€™s behalf.

She took half a step in Elisha'€™s direction.

"€œBoy!"€ the merchant suddenly barked. "€œQuit gawkin'€™ at the lady and get back to work! I ought to sell you South! You ain'€™t worth a shoelace!"€

Julia froze, the harsh, unexpected tone stinging her ears. Elisha immediately dropped his gaze. His broom began to fly. She felt so terrible for distracting him that she started to speak on his behalf. Just as she opened her mouth, Samuel clasped her elbow. He must have read her mind.

She glanced at him. The look in his eyes was an unspoken warning.

Though it pained her, she kept silent.

The man behind the counter changed his tone like a gentleman did a soiled shirt. "€œWell, I thank you both for the gift,"€ he said. "€œThat is right kind of you. Give my best to your preacher."€

"€œYou are quite welcome sir,"€ Samuel replied. "€œWe will. Have a pleasant day."€

He nudged her gently. Julia cast a quick glance in Elisha'€™s direction before turning to go. He was still sweeping, his eyes seemingly nailed to the floor.

They stepped outside.

A buckboard pulled in front of the store and a trio of laborers in scrap shirts jumped to the sidewalk. Julia paid them no mind. She was too busy thinking of what had just taken place in the store. The merchant had spoken quite kindly to them, so much so that she perceived him a charitable man. How could he in the same breath shout at Elisha, as though he was no better than a stray dog?

"€œI brought trouble upon him,"€ she said, not really meaning to voice the thought.

Samuel took the second basket from her then remained close to her side. The sidewalk was narrow.

"€œElisha knows your intentions were kind,"€ he said.

She looked up at him. He seemed as troubled as she felt. "€œYou knew that man would behave in such a way, didn'€™t you?"€

"€œNo, but I assumed he would."€

She sighed heavily.

"€œFew people show their slaves any kindness,"€ he said. "€œMost see them only as a source of labor, of property."€

She shook her head, disgusted by the thought. "€œThey are children."€

"€œYes, they are, and God loves them."€

"€œThey need to know that,"€ she said.


Sam agreed with her. Elisha and Elijah did need to hear of God'€™s love. He admired her desire but as she saw for herself today, teaching a slave child about Christ was a difficult matter.

But there must be some way.

A steamboat had docked and the way was crowded and noisy. He and Julia walked in silence until reaching Charles Street. He was so lost in his own thoughts
that he failed to see the opportunity God had placed before them.

Julia recognized it before he did.

A few feet ahead of them, a man in a green silk vest and stovepipe hat was just about to step into an elegant carriage.

"€œSamuel,"€ she whispered. "€œThe basket."€

He quickly gave it to her, recognizing just as Julia had that the man was the banker who had stopped by the bread table a few days ago.

"€œExcuse me, sir,"€ she said, going up to him.

The man turned to look at her. His expression indicated that he recognized her, as well. He tipped his hat and smiled. "€œYou are the lady from the church, aren'€™t you?"€

"€œYes, sir. Would you be so kind as to accept this gift on our behalf for you and your business associates?"€

Though by all outward appearances the man had want for nothing, he seemed touched by her generosity. Sam was, as well. Julia could warm the coldest heart with her Christian charity.

"€œI would be honored to do so, miss,"€ the banker said. "€œThank you."€

She smiled sweetly, a look which she held long after the banker'€™s departure. As they strolled up Charles Street, Sam'€™s heart thumped wildly. His mouth was dry.

I know You have a plan for us, Lord. And I believe You mean for us to serve You together.

"€œWell,"€ she said. "€œI suppose the Almighty used one misfortune today for something good."€

"€œIndeed. And I believe He often does so."€ Though hesitant, Sam acted upon what he was thinking. "€œIt is near the dinner hour. Would you care to stop in one of the restaurants for a bite to eat?"€

Chapter Nine

H
er fingers tapped her parasol as she considered the idea. Her foolish heart wished to accept his invitation. Her determined will, however, kept her on course.

Serving our community is one thing. Eating together is quite another.

Whether Samuel saw the event as simply an extension of the day'€™s journey or an opportunity to rekindle love lost, she did not know. Thankfully the sewing circle offered her the luxury of politely declining his request.

"€œThank you, but no. I must return home for the sewing circle."€

His face showed his disappointment for the slightest moment but he then offered her a pleasant smile.

"€œOf course. I forgot. We mustn'€™t keep the ladies waiting."€

Ever the gentleman, he escorted her promptly home.

Since Sally was otherwise occupied, Julia was hosting the circle that afternoon at her house. Rebekah had still not returned. Julia, however, was not distressed. Her absence gave the other women freedom to discuss the activities of the men they each prayed for.

"€œOur brother George is well and eager to be in action,"€ Trudy said, having also received a recent letter.

"€œEdward and Stephen are, as well,"€ Julia said, "€œthough I do hope the Guard will be able to put fear into those Federal soldiers without using force."€

"€œAs do I,"€ Elizabeth said.

They tugged at their yarn and speedily completed pairs of butternut or gray socks. Yet even as Julia labored for her brother'€™s brave men, she found her thoughts returning to Elijah and Elisha.

If anyone needs stockings it is them. They won'€™t be able to make deliveries barefoot come autumn.

Though she would gladly knit them each a pair, she wondered how she could possibly make certain they would receive them. By his actions at the store, more than likely the man behind the counter would not allow them to keep any gift.

I should ask Samuel. Perhaps he can think of a way.

The following day the two of them were together again. Thankfully, Sally returned, as well, bringing her special spice cake for the hungry good citizens of Baltimore.

Three more visitors entered the church house and the banker they had met on the street returned. He stopped again at the table.

"€œI must thank you for your kindness yesterday,"€ he told them. "€œThe tea cakes were delicious."€

"€œYou are very welcome, sir,"€ Julia replied. "€œThey were made by one of our widows."€

He smiled. "€œI must confess, I was quite hesitant to be involved with any religious gathering but I found your prayer meeting most enlightening. I would like to learn more about Christ."€

Julia'€™s heart swelled with joy. She looked to Samuel who then lovingly explained God'€™s sacrifice for mankind.

"€œThe Word tells us that God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him, should not perish but have everlasting life."€

The banker was listening attentively, so Samuel continued on. Julia smiled. Samuel could articulate the truths of Scripture in a way she never could. It was a privilege to watch as he pointed the man toward a relationship with Christ.

She and Sally silently prayed. When the man went into the church house rejoicing, Julia touched Samuel'€™s sleeve.

"€œGod bless you,"€ she said, tears filling her eyes. "€œHeaven rejoices because of what you have just done."€

The look he gave her enveloped her in warmth. "€œIt was you who gave him the basket. You are the one who told him we weren'€™t doing this for political reasons."€

Her heart swelled even further. Samuel was one of the most humble men she had ever known. He never claimed a success as his own but always chose to include others, no matter how small the role.

"€œI suppose we have done as Reverend Perry had hoped,"€ she said. "€œWe have served our community, united."€

"€œIndeed we have. It is my hope that we will continue to do so."€

"€œThere is a city full of opportunities,"€ Sally said.

Julia broke eye contact with him. For a moment she had forgotten that her friend was even there. Sally pointed across the street.

"€œHere they come,"€ she said.

Julia looked to see Elijah and Elisha on their way up
the street. She quickly brushed the tears from her eyes, her excitement building.

"€œWill you help me?"€ she asked Samuel.

"€œCertainly."€

She snatched two slices of Sally'€™s spice cake and headed across the street.

"€œI am so pleased to see you both,"€ Julia said. She looked then at little Elisha. The hole in the knee of his trousers was getting bigger. "€œAnd I am terribly sorry for getting you into trouble."€

He looked at her with those wide brown eyes. His brother draped his arm around him. "€œOh, don'€™t you fret none, Miss Julia,"€ Elijah said. "€œHe'€™s fine."€

She was not convinced. What if the man had scolded him further after her departure or worse? "€œIs that the truth?"€

"€œYes'€™um."€

Elisha nodded, as well. He smiled. Julia'€™s heart lifted.

She handed them each a slice of cake. They devoured it in one breath.

"€œThis here'€™s the best bread we'€™z ever eaten!"€ Elijah proclaimed.

Julia chuckled. "€œI'€™ll tell Miss Sally that you like it."€

Samuel handed them each a cup of water. "€œYou have been working so hard,"€ he said. "€œHow about if I deliver that grain for you? Then you can linger here with Miss Julia."€

Elijah'€™s eyes widened in shock and so did his brother'€™s.

"€œOh, no, ser. We'€™z can'€™t have you doin'€™ our work."€

Around them people were passing. A few stared. Some glared. Samuel, however, was not deterred.

"€œWell, then, what if I carry it for the next three streets then you can finish the delivery?"€

The boys started to protest but Samuel hoisted the grain on his broad shoulder. "€œWe had better be on our way, young men. We don'€™t want to be late."€

"€œNo, ser!"€

The two children thanked Julia for the bread then hurried off. They skipped around Samuel as he walked. Before the rumble of the wagon wheels drowned out their voices she heard him ask, "€œHave the two of you ever heard about Jesus?"€

Julia smiled to herself as she crossed back to the churchyard. A waiting Sally was grinning. "€œWord will get out and every hungry child in town will be on this street."€

"€œThen that will be a good thing."€

"€œYes, indeed."€

Julia gave Elijah and Elisha an extra slice of cake on their return route. They thanked her profusely then scampered off toward the harbor. Samuel escorted her across Charles Street.

"€œI heard you speak of Jesus,"€ she said. "€œWhat exactly did you say?"€

The light of God shone on his face. Julia couldn'€™t help but stare. "€œI told them that God loved them,"€ he said. "€œThat He had sent His Son to pay the penalty for the wrongs they had done."€ He paused. "€œDo you know what they asked?"€

"€œNo. What?"€

"€œThey asked if Jesus was a white man."€

She blinked. "€œHow did you answer them?"€

"€œI told them He was neither white nor Negro. That we were all created in God'€™s image and therefore He looked a little something like us all."€

Julia smiled. She had never given much thought before to what the Savior actually looked like. She supposed
what Samuel said was true. "€œI think that was a wise answer."€

By the time they reached the bread table the prayer meeting was ending. Julia'€™s parents had just stepped out the church door.

"€œWould you allow me to walk you home today?"€ Samuel asked. "€œThere is something I would like to discuss with you."€

The request took her by surprise. She was eager to continue discussing Elijah and Elisha but she did not wish to make walking with him a habit. He had honored her wishes by not discussing her brother or politics thus far but what if that changed? What if as they strolled through Mount Vernon, he tried to convince her that the secessionist position was the wrong course of action?

"€œYou wrote Edward,"€ she said.

He blinked. "€œYes. I did."€

"€œWhy?"€

He blinked again, mouth shifting slightly as though he were searching for the words. "€œI wanted to tell him that I was sorry for the way we parted company. I wanted to tell him that I am praying for him."€

"€œDid you tell him about us?"€

He looked surprised. "€œI supposed you had,"€ he said.

Heat filled her face and Julia immediately regretted the question. Samuel would think she had not told Edward because she still had hopes to be his wife.

Well, I don'€™t. We are far too different. He may be an admirable man but I can only be yoked with someone who will support and defend my family'€™s honor.

There was a long pause. The look in his eyes tugged at her heart.

"€œWill you walk with me?"€ he asked once more.

Though her pride and political position warned her otherwise, she agreed.

"€œLet me speak with Father and Mother,"€ she said.

"€œOf course. I will see to it that we are finished here."€


Sam hurried to return the water barrels and other items to the church cellar. Sally followed.

"€œGo on now,"€ she said with a grin. "€œI will wash the cups."€

He thanked her for her kindness then quickly went back outside.

Julia stood waiting on the front steps. With one full look at her, Sam had to catch his breath. Her blue eyes were framed by a sea-green and white bonnet. The matching dress she wore was airy and light.

He had to remind himself why she was waiting for him. She did not do so as a fiancée eager to be with her betrothed. It was simply because he had requested to speak with her further.

Have patience,
he told himself,
and be thankful for small things.

"€œThank you for waiting,"€ he said. "€œShall we go?"€

He offered his arm but she did not take it.

"€œWhat did you wish to discuss?"€ she asked. He could hear the uncertainty in her voice.

"€œActually, it concerns your sewing circle, I suppose."€

His own nervousness was very apparent to him. He hoped she would not notice. If she did, she did not say.

"€œThe circle?"€ she asked. "€œWhat about, exactly?"€

"€œSally mentioned that you are knitting socks for Edward'€™s regiment."€

Her spine stiffened. The look she shot him was that of a lioness ready to defend her cub.

"€œI think it is commendable that you are knitting for
the men,"€ he said quickly. "€œThey will need the socks for winter."€

The lioness transformed to a kitten before his eyes. A hint of a smile emerged. "€œThen I knit with your blessing?"€

It encouraged him that she asked for it. "€œOf course. Men need to keep their feet warm."€

"€œThank you, Samuel. I appreciate that."€

The lace trim of her pagoda sleeve was brushing the back of his hand and her rose water scent was intoxicating. He tried to keep focus.

"€œYou are welcome. I was wondering if perhaps you might be interested in helping someone here in town. I mean, in addition to Edward and his men."€

Her expression settled to a curious look. "€œWhat kind of help?"€ she asked.

"€œA few pairs of wool socks, perhaps a loaf of bread or two. It would be for a good cause."€

A column of Federal soldiers rounded the corner, their boots clicking in unison step. Julia immediately went pale. She clutched his arm. Linked together they remained until the men had passed. Julia then dropped her hand.

"€œWhat cause?"€ she whispered. "€œWhom would I be helping?"€

"€œSomeone in great need. Someone hungry and cold."€ He stopped, turning to face her fully. He could see the questions in her eyes.

He wanted to share in detail the opportunity that Dr. Carter had presented him and tell her how, more than anything, he hoped she would join him in that cause. Though he wished to tell her everything, he knew he could not. At least not yet.

"€œI am sorry I cannot tell you more,"€ he said, "€œbut
please know that I wouldn'€™t be asking you this if it was not of the utmost importance."€

Her eyes held his as though she were searching for any hint of insincerity. "€œJust answer me one question,"€ she said.

"€œCertainly."€

"€œDoes this have anything to do with Yankee soldiers?"€

Sam let out a laugh. He couldn'€™t help it. For once they could agree. Soldiers in blue were the last people that he wanted involved.

"€œAbsolutely not,"€ he promised. "€œNot one Federal soldier. You have my word on that."€

That irresistible smile slowly filled her face. "€œWell, then, in that case, I suppose I could knit an extra pair this week."€

"€œAnd the bread?"€ he dared ask.

"€œI could spare a loaf."€

He could barely contain his happiness. "€œBless you, Julia."€

Her smile broadened. That mischievous glimmer danced through her eyes. "€œI must confess, I have wanted to knit for those in need. I just wasn'€™t sure how to go about delivering the items."€

Sam could barely believe his ears.
The Lord'€™s hand is in this. He is preparing the way of service for the runaways.
In his enthusiasm he reached for her hands. "€œOh, sweetheart."€

She pulled back and quickly looked down at the ground. Her cheeks were pink from his attention. Sam took a half step back and adjusted his hat.

"€œWhen would you need the items?"€ she asked.

"€œWhen could you have them ready?"€

She raised her head. Her lower lip disappeared as she
calculated the time. "€œA day or two,"€ she said. "€œIt doesn'€™t take that long to knit a pair of socks. I can bring them to the meeting."€

"€œThat would be wonderful."€

They continued walking and to Sam'€™s dismay they reached her family'€™s front gate all too soon. He opened it slowly then tipped his hat.

"€œI appreciate your assistance,"€ he said.

Julia nodded formally, almost regally, and he was completely caught up in the moment. His heartbeat quickened.

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