Her Reluctant Viscount (Rakes and Rogues) (32 page)

“She accompanied Miss Adrys.”

Frustration mounted. Things were supposed to be easier now. She should be here because he had something to ask her. Something important.

“I need to see her when she returns.”

“I will inform her when she does.”

His annoyance had begun to overflow by the time he made it back home. His butler met him with two messages. The first from Jack in which he demanded him to come for an audience. He tossed it to the side and picked up the other.

Went to Kittle Manor. Thank you for saving me.

~Jo

His breath left him in a rush, a mix of relief and disappointment. She was running again. Did she ever
not
run? Keeping a hold of her note, he called for his horse to be readied and went to grab his bags.

Ptolemy awaited him outside. Normally he would have ridden another but he wanted Ptolemy to rest in the country where he would have open space to run in and not live in a stall.

Swinging up, he stared at his butler. “If Jack comes by you have not seen me.”

“Very good, my lord.”

He gave a sharp nod and continued on his way. There was no reason to stop at night and he kept his mount plodding along. He was tired when he rode up to Kittle Manor. Did not stop his anticipation at seeing Jo again.

Chapter Twelve

Somedays more than others I wish to leave this cursed country and return to Africa. I miss the purity of it all.

~From the private journal of Josephine Adrys

Jo rose to her feet when Najja came into the room. Tears immediately sprung to her eyes as she went to her friend’s side. They overflowed the moment the familiar arms surrounded her.

“Are you okay?”

She nodded, still holding onto Najja. Vittoria was upstairs asleep, her body desperately seeking what it had been refused for so long.

“Jo.”

Slowly, Jo allowed some distance to be placed between them. She stared at her friend, glowing in her pregnant state.

“How are you? Where is the rest of the family?”

Brown eyes held hers unblinkingly. “Is the threat removed?”

This was a familiar side of Najja. All business. If she were not a mother with another on the way, Jo would not have lied. Nevertheless, she was and so Jo did.

“Yes.”

“And you are certain you are okay?” Her fingers glided along the faint bruise, which had yet to completely fade away.

Jo tried, truly she did, but there was no stopping the fresh flood of tears, which streamed forth. Najja murmured in her native tongue and led her to the love seat. Curling up tight, Jo allowed it to all come out. The flood had been stamped too many times and now it refused to be contained any longer. She realized she had not gotten it all out at her townhouse like she had believed.

Najja held her, allowed her to cry. Jo lost track of time, this was for her. No Trystan around, no Vittoria to be strong for. Only her and a woman she respected so much. Eventually the tears dried up and she sat up when a flutter could be felt along her arm which pressed against the swell of Najja’s stomach.

“Oh!” She stared at Najja.

“She is active.”

“How do you know?”

The gentle smile which graced Najja’s face showed Jo how different she had become as Countess Clifton. She was so pleased her friend had finally discovered happiness. Colin doted on her and their children. While Pug was not of their blood, they loved him as their own. Alexander as well. And Pug loved his brother.

“Colin told me he longed for a daughter.” Her hand stilled along her swollen stomach.

“What do you want?”

“Healthy. That is all I care about. Boy or girl is fine. I would like a daughter. She would have two wonderful brothers to protect her.”

Protect. Something Jo had been unable to do for herself. Najja sensed her inner turmoil and grabbed her hand.

“You have nothing to be ashamed of. I am sorry I was not there.”

“This is not your fault, Najja. The man in charge used me to lure this person out. A woman. I…I tried to warn Tryst it was a woman, he did not believe me. It was, I swear.”

Najja nodded solemnly. “I believe you. And that man is foolish to disregard your words.”

A glint appeared in her eyes before it was wiped away leaving behind the blank expression, which never gave away her thoughts. Jo rearranged herself, drawing her legs up under her.

“How do you do it?”

As she expected, Najja did not make her clarify what she meant. “There is no easy answer, Jo. Taking a life is not easy.”

Her stomach rolled at the memory. “You never let anything bother you.”

“You do not want to be to a point where taking a life has no effect on you. When that happens you will have lost a very important part of yourself.”

“I want to be strong!” Her voice rose. “I do not want to be afraid ever again. Or helpless.”

“You are strong, Jo. Never forget that.” Najja stood. “Come with me.”

Jo followed without question. They moved to a window and peered out to where Colin played with Pug and Alexander. She did not understand. “What am I supposed to see?”

“Each one of them and yourself. I love so much it scares me. I am afraid I will not be there if they need me. If
you
need me as I was not before. My love, my children. I have that fear daily. You cannot live without fear, Jo. It matters not how strong you are. Fear exists.”

“Not for Tryst,” she muttered.

Najja merely arched an eyebrow at that statement. Jo sighed and stepped away from the familial scene before her. It did not seem like she would have a family now. Perhaps one day but the question remained, would she ever love anyone as she loved Tryst? She had done so for years, catching glimpses of the man he normally kept hidden from everyone. Each time her love deepened and she had held onto a young woman’s fanciful hope he would return her feelings.

He had taken her virginity yet she held no illusions things would change between them. Tryst was a man fully dedicated to his country and King. She admired that about him, even though she knew it would always come first.

“You love him.”

Jo blinked and stared, having forgotten Najja was even in the room. “What makes you say that?”

Najja held her stare until Jo ducked her head unable to hold her gaze any longer. There was no way or reason for her to deny it, her friend knew her too well. Jo worried her lower lip before sighing.

“How do you manage to know everything?”

Jo expected a smile but did not get even a hint of one. Her own faltered and she wrung her hands together. Her stomach fluttered and she knew that Najja knew.

Najja’s gaze hardened. “I am going to kill him.” The tone of her words portrayed the seriousness.

Jo gulped. Najja was furious. The door opened and Alexander ran in with Pug and Colin on his heels.

“Jo!”

Grateful for the interruption, Jo crouched down, arms wide for Alexander’s hug. Tears pricked her eyes as he squeezed her tight. Standing with him still in her embrace, she stared at Colin. His green eyes overflowed with compassion.

“Jo. Good to see you.”

He took back his son after hugging her.

“Colin.” She gave him a small smile. He was the older brother she never had. She knew he cared for her and would always protect her.

“Hello, Jo.”

Her smile grew as she focused on Pug. The size of a man almost, she could not see the street urchin he had been. Only the man he was fast on his way to becoming.

“Pug. How is Eton?”

His blue eyes roved over her. “Good. I head back in a few days.”

“Wonderful. Classes are well?”

He nodded, his unruly hair falling forward over his eyes. She almost brushed it back but hesitated at the last moment. She had no wish to embarrass him. Sure, she had done it in the past but he was no longer a boy of such few years.

The young man would be a heartbreaker when he finally came into his own.

She rang for refreshments and soon they had all sat down around the snacks and drinks. Najja and Colin sat together, Pug alone in a tall backed seat, and Alex flitted between them, a sandwich in his hand.

Eating a shortbread cookie, she reached for her tea when the door to the receiving room opened again. This time to admit Tryst. The atmosphere of the room changed dramatically the moment he stepped through.

There was no way he did not notice yet nothing showed on his face. She shoved her feelings for him even further into a dark corner and locked the door on them. With a deep breath, she got to her feet and bobbed. Everyone rose.

“Lord Wilkes.”

Funny. That got a reaction from him. His eyes darkened dangerously before he glanced at Colin. She felt Najja’s gaze upon her and refused to meet it. Where to look? Pug. He seemed to be safe enough.

The anger on his face surprised her. She had believed he liked Trystan. No, Lord Wilkes. Keep the distance.

Too late. Trystan focused on her now. Breaking off his conversation with Colin, he strode toward her. While he no longer wore torn and dirty clothes, he still could not hide his walk. The man was positively dangerous. He flowed to her like a predator hunting his prey.

His gaze directed fully upon her as he neared. Her knees grew a bit weak at his heated and more than slightly possessive stare. His hair floated around him creating an avenging angel look. Or was that devil? More devil she bet.

As he stopped before her, she struggled to remain impassive. Not easy. He handed her something, she had not even known he had carried. Taking it, she gave a small mewl of pleasure. Her sketchbook.

“My book. Thank you. I thought I had lost this.”

“Duchess Haversham found it. Your other items are at your townhouse.”

She met his gaze and spoke from the heart. “Thank you.”

He nodded and his expression puzzled her. She wanted to touch him, curl against his hard body, and let his strong arms hold her. To experience his callused hands skimming over her heated flesh, making her cry out with pleasure. Lord, one night had only awakened her desire.

She wanted more. With another thankful smile, she turned away and walked off, unable to be so close and not touch. She set her book on a table before reclaiming her seat.

“Would you like to join us?”

“Yes, thank you.”

He sat near her and she hated the tremble in her hands as she served him. Cautious to avoid any skin-to-skin contact she handed him some tea.

“I looked for you in London.” He took some sandwiches.

“I missed the country.” She stirred lemon in her tea.

“You travelled alone?”

“Captain Bottomley escorted me. He was on his way anyway.”

“Duchess Haversham has offered her home to you if you do not wish to be alone.”

“Thank you, but I am fine here.”

“Is it over?” Najja asked an edge to her tone.

Trystan shook his head and stretched out his legs. Jo watched him from beneath lowered lids. He wore a crisp white shirt, no ascot, unbuttoned at the top. Tan breeches, which molded to his powerful thighs, and shiny Hessians.

Her fingers itched to touch and explore him. She gulped some tea, eyes watering at the burn. At least it took her mind off Tryst and his naked body.

Did it not?

“This is unacceptable.” Najja’s declaration brought Jo back to the current conversation.