Hidden Sins (8 page)

“Buttons,” she replied. “Heard of it?”

“Uh, no. Is it a bar?”

“Of sorts. The money’s great, like really great. They usually only like brunettes, but for you, I’m sure they’d make an exception. You’re gorgeous. You’re a natural blonde, aren’t you?” She twisted her lips as she contemplated something.

I nodded. “Wait. Is it a—”

“Strip joint?” she laughed. “No. It’s a different type of bar. You need a membership.”

“For what? To drink?” I asked.

“No matter how I say it…it’s going to come out weird,” Liv said.

“No offense, but that doesn’t sound promising,” I laughed. The last thing I needed was to jump out of one group of psychos and into another underground world.

“The pay’s amazing…” She smiled, watching my reaction.

“How amazing?” I asked.

“Amazing enough that I’ll be leaving school without any loans and plenty in my savings come spring.”

“Is it legal?” I almost whispered.

Her laughter made me feel foolish, but so did taking a sip of her serum.

“Yes. It’s legal.” She raised her brow. “We’re in the land of Hollywood stars. And nothing makes people feel more special than thinking they have the same privileges as those who grace the covers of every magazine. This state has enough wannabes who are willing to pay to feel special. People will pay a high price for exclusivity. I’m sure it sounds ridiculous coming from where you do…” her voice trailed off.

If only she knew. The world I left behind was based on exclusivity and misuse of power in the highest form. The right to belong had a price, but it wasn’t money. A shiver ran through my body.

“You okay?” she asked.

I nodded. “Sorry. Not used to the AC.”

“If you’re interested, how about you see for yourself? I work tonight and you can meet me beforehand.” She scribbled the address on a napkin and handed it to me. “I’d rather you check the place out and see if you’re into it before I introduce you to the owners.”

My stomach knotted as I looked into her eyes. “How long would it take me to get enough for the deposit and rent on my own apartment?” I asked, pushing the fear aside.

She grinned and her eyes glinted with fascination. “I’d say a couple of weeks, depending on what type of place you want.”

“A one bedroom, even a studio.”

Liv’s mouth dropped open. “Honey, you’d have enough for a place like that in a few days of work. My advice would be to save a little more and get a place right on the beach.” The glint in her eye was telling. Money meant a lot to Liv, but showing it off meant even more. All I wanted was to be able to live in a safe neighborhood and maybe build a small cushion for when my truck broke down the next time.

“See that out there?” she interrupted my thoughts.

I followed her pointed finger to a white Range Rover parked outside the Starbucks.

”Yeah. What about it?”

“That’s my ride.”

This made no sense. Wouldn’t everyone be doing whatever it was she did? If nothing else, I wanted to see what it was this place was about, even if I didn’t get a job there. I was just too nosey to let this slip by.

“Huh. I guess I’ll see ya tonight then,” I said, smiling, as I slid the napkin into my purse. “Thanks for telling me about it.” I closed the netbook and shoved it into my purse, along with my uneaten breakfast sandwich. Glancing at the beach, I strapped my bag around my shoulder and grabbed my latte. Maybe spending some time on the beach would help me sort things out. I hadn’t had a moment of peace since I’d landed in California, and within a day I’d already felt like life around here was as bizarre as where I’d left, but in a completely different way.

“See ya,” she replied, giving me a quick wave before I headed out the front door.

I walked along the sidewalk to the crosswalk and pushed the button. The chirping alerted me that it was time to cross. As I made my way to the parking lot for beach access, I glanced at all the cars filling the lot. There was one shiny, new car after the next. I doubted there was anything over a few years old at the beach. And how could so many people spend a workday at the beach? I hoisted my bag higher over my shoulder and made my way to the sand. The beach was packed. Colorful towels and umbrellas dotted the sand, with children filling buckets and parents reading. There were surfers in the water at the far end, and mothers and fathers guiding their children in the shallow water. The sun was blazing and it felt like another world where problems didn’t exist and every day was a new beginning. This was what I wanted.

As I trudged through the sand, I realized how difficult it was going to be in my shoes to make my way to the benches. I stopped, placing my purse on the sand, and pulled my shoes off. Feeling the sand between my toes made me feel like I was on vacation. What I imagined being on vacation felt like, anyway. I’d never been on an actual getaway. I made my way to the cluster of benches and laughed aloud as I saw the sign posted near the area.

Free Wireless Available

Seriously? At a beach? That would explain why so many people had their laptops balanced on their knees.

I took a seat on one of the empty benches and placed my purse next to me, watching the waves roll in and out. The sound of the water crashing and the children laughing in delight made me feel like everything was going to be okay, whether or not that was true. I decided to join the party and continue looking for employment on my netbook. Not that I didn’t believe Liv’s employment opportunity, but I didn’t believe Liv’s employment opportunity.

“Miss? Don’t I know you from somewhere?” I heard from behind. I didn’t know who the man was talking to, but the person wasn’t answering.

I surfed the Craigslist employment ads, scanning more office jobs when the man tried again. My eyes focused on the hourly wages as I continued to quickly tabulate just how long it would take me to save enough to get out of the house. It would take a very long time.

“Don’t I know you?” the man’s voice startled me but not as much as his eyes as he took a seat next to me.

He didn’t look the least bit familiar.

“No. I’m sorry. I think you’ve got me confused with someone else.” I said, turning back to my netbook.

“I don’t think I do,” his voice cold, calculating.

My heart rate pounded as I looked around this beach filled with people. Nothing could happen to me here. There were too many people around.

I turned to face the man. My gaze steadied on his dark eyes. There was no warmth behind them. His expression matched theirs. He had been sent by the leaders. How was this possible? How had they found me?

“Your car trouble seems to have been temporarily resolved. That’s a shame. I’ll have to do better next time,” the man stated. “Pity, really, that such a nice man stepped in to help you. I imagine he’ll have to be taken care of as well. No good deed goes unpunished.”

My blood froze as I stared at him.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said, moving my finger to the emergency button on my cell phone and praying I landed in the right area as I hit the screen.

“I think you do. And the less of a scene you make, the better for everyone involved. I might even take it easy on that guy. Understand?” his voice low.

“I guess if I truly understood, I never would’ve left New Hampshire,” I replied. “But I dare you to take me off this bench. You lay one finger on me and I’ll scream bloody murder.”

“You know something that can’t be known. You remember something that can’t be remembered,” the man laughed. “Don’t think for a second that we don’t know that.”

The sirens rang through the air as the police cars drove into the parking lot behind us. I shoved my netbook in my purse and stood up. My pulse raced as I turned to face the officers that arrived in the parking lot. They looked like tiny specks from this distance. Waving my hands frantically, I watched as the police jumped out of their cars, but it was too late. The man next to me uttered a few words before taking off, and I’d never felt so alone in the world as I did now. His last words repeated over and over again in my mind, as if I needed a reminder of the hell that had become my life.

“You can run, but you can’t hide.”

Luke

I sat on the couch in my hotel room and opened my laptop. Taking a swig of beer, I leaned against the cushions, trying to make sense of the popup community in the middle of nowhere. Room service had just arrived with my lukewarm cheeseburger and fries, but what I’d been really looking forward to was what I was sipping on at the moment. I looked around the living room of my suite and wondered what Hannah was doing right now. Was she safe? Was she miserable where she was now living? Unfortunately, my suspicion was that she wasn’t actually free from anything. I thought about going back to the compound tonight. But what would that prove? Probably nothing and I might just be putting her in harm’s way.

I hadn’t had the best of luck with women, and I was sure that tradition would be kept alive moving forward. But it was hard not to think about undressing Hannah, feeling her soft skin against mine. It wasn’t like me to daydream about a woman. Yet here I was doing just that. I took another sip and shook myself out of it. Flipping on Bloomberg news, I began to search online for any type of information that might explain what I’d just seen. I wondered if they were basing their way of life on divinely inspired visions or a man who saw an opening for control and power.

My cell rang and I glanced down at the number.

Damn! It was Jessica. I forgot I’d mentioned to her that I’d be in town. We weren’t exclusive, and it wasn’t a long distance relationship. I really had no idea what the hell to call it, except a longstanding problem, which I’d created for myself. She was a flight attendant who I’d met on a flight from Miami to Los Angeles a few years back. She was about as interested in a relationship as I was, which just proved that there were a lot more screwed-up people in the world than anyone could imagine. Relationship runners was the official term my sister used. I let out a deep breath and answered my cell.

“Hey,” I said.

“Babe, how are you this fine evening?” she teased.

My stomach cringed. That was a first. She was an attractive woman and nice. Very nice. But that was where our similarities ended, which didn’t seem to bother me two months ago. Now, it was very bothersome.

“Doing well,” I confirmed.

“Are you at the same hotel? Should I come over dressed in my finest?”

I couldn’t help but laugh at how desperate that sounded and how desperate I must have sounded over the years trying to sling my one-liners at her. Desperate souls called for desperate measures, I supposed.

“I’m actually working on a case tonight, and I’m pretty drained.” I could barely believe the words were leaving my lips.

“I could just bring by some dinner from your favorite—”

“I’m actually about to finish a deliciously dried-out burger from the hotel, but I appreciate the thought.”

“I get the distinct feeling there’s more to this story. How about if I come over and you can explain it to me?”

I laughed into the phone, recognizing the same loneliness I’d felt so many times myself over the years. But this thing we had between us never fixed it. It never would.

“Not this time, Jessica. I’m sorry. I’m just not… It wouldn’t be right,” I spoke, scrolling through the database.

“Have you found someone else?” she asked abruptly.

“No. Nothing like that.” I pulled my attention away from the screen and sighed. “I think I’m done with being casual.”

Jessica’s laugh echoed into the room so loudly, it sounded as if she was on the couch next to me.

“Sure you are,” she finally answered. “Well, I’m not… so if you’re ever in town and…”

“Thank you, Jessica,” I interrupted. “But I think I’ll be just fine.”

“All right, babe. It’s been fun,” she said, before hanging up.

And I suddenly felt like the cheapest date in town. As I brought the laptop to the couch, I thought back to my time with Jessica. She was fine as hell, but there was never a connection beyond the physical—in the moment—connection that could happen to anyone in the right circumstances. As horrible as this sounded, I never thought much about her before or after the encounter and neither did she. There was none of that lingering sense of need or want in between our rendezvous so why did I keep going back? Because it was safe?

I laughed, thinking how pathetic I must look if I sounded this bad. I began scanning the database again for some sign of a non-profit or something masquerading as such with her old address and was relieved when one finally came up as a match. The one at this address went by New Life, acted upon as NLC. I assumed the C stood for church? NLC was established in 1979 as a social welfare organization and has been claiming not-for-profit status ever since. I quickly put the name through one of the watch lists and it came up with nothing. I ran it through a cult database and took another sip of beer as I awaited the results. Was I dealing with a Heaven’s Gate meets the Amish or what?

As I gazed at the long list, Hannah popped into my head again. The package that contained the cell should have been delivered this morning, and as if on cue, I received a text from her. She’d received the package. I tried my best to sound playful but failed miserably. Her text sounded sweet as hell and…