Hillary_Flesh and Blood (35 page)

Haunted by horrific speculation, frustrated by the unknown, Kathy spent the last hour before leaving her bed praying for strength. She knew she had a long, dim road ahead of her. She knew her nightmare was just beginning.

Hillary stirred on the couch when she heard Kathy
’
s footsteps on the stairs. It took her a second to remember how bad things had become. It was Mother
’
s Day, but her mother hated her. Her mother wanted nothing to do with her. Her mother had only cared about her disgusting father. Now that he was gone, she only cared about her disgusting brother.

She didn
’
t know if she felt more sadness or anger over how things had progressed, but without a doubt, she knew she had just one ally, one friend: the voice of reason. She had defied it before and where did it get her? The voice knew. It was always right. Hillary had to find a way to shed her weak emotions and obey its every command. The voice was her god.

Hillary wouldn
’
t say
“
Happy Mother
’
s Day
”
or make any further attempts at conversation. If her mother knew she was a monster, then there was no point
hiding
the savage beast.

Had Kathy shown just a little compassion, given Hillary the slightest glimmer of hope, it might have been a different day entirely. However, between her physical and mental exhaustion and her indecision about how best to handle the situation, Kathy did what came easiest to her. She ignored it. And she ignored Hillary. She prepared breakfast and lunch, which Hillary, like a moth drawn to a flame, ate silently in the company of her dwindling f
amily. Breakfast was particular
ly awkward, but Hillary didn
’
t care. She was starving and she was going to eat the pancakes her mother made.

Lunch started out just as dreadful, but halfway through, the phone rang. Kathy answered the phone just before the call went to the voicemail.

“
May I speak with Mr. Greyson?
”
a woman
’
s voice requested.

“Uh, no,
he
’
s not here. Who
’
s calling?
”

“
I
’
m Dr. Mackey from Chestnut Ridge Animal Hospital. Are you Mrs. Greyson?
”

“
Yes,
”
Kathy replied.

“
Thank God. I
’
ve been trying to con
tact your husband for days. He
brought your dog, Storm, here for treatment. By the way, what exactly happened to Storm?
”

“
I-I don
’
t know...I wasn
’
t home.
”

“
Uh-huh,
”
murmured Dr. Mackey skeptically,
“
well, in any case, I couldn
’
t get through to anyone on the number your husband left for me so finally I thought of looking through the file for an alternate number. I
’
m glad I reached you. You
’
ll have to come and get Storm. I
’
m afraid I can
’
t board her here any longer, I
’
m leaving in a couple hours for Virginia.
”

“
What? Pick her up today?
”

“
Can you be here in about half an hour?
”

“
There
’
s no way, I live
about
an hour away, can
’
t you just keep her another night?
”

“
I
’
m afraid not, Mrs. Greyson, as I mentioned, I
’
m going away. Storm is better now. I was rather surprised that no one called to check on her. Your husband seemed so concerned about her.
”

“
We
’
ve got a lot going on here, Dr. Mackey. I just don
’
t know if I can drive down there on such short notice.
”

“
I assure you, Ma
’
am, I
’
ve left several messages for your husband. Do you all not want this dog back?
”

“
No, no, it
’
s nothing like that. Of course we want her back.
”

“
Then I suggest you come and get her, otherwise I
’
m dropping her off at the
county
pound as an abandoned pet.
”

“
No, don
’
t do that,
”
Kathy pleaded, not knowing what to do. The timing was awful.

“
Well, I
’
ll leave it up to you. I
’
m locking up at three o
’
clock sharp. If you
’
re not here, I
’
ll take Storm to the
county pound in
Willingston and you can try to get her back from there.
”

“
No, no...I
’
ll be there. I
’
ll leave in a little while and be there before three.
”

“
Oh, and bring your checkbook,
”
Dr. Mackey added, hanging up without waiting for a reply.

“
I have to get Storm,
”
Kathy said aloud, to no one in particular. She just needed to hear the words in order to proc
ess them, to let them sink in,
to affirm what needed to be done.

She
’
s talking to me again?
Hillary thought, not especially thrilled about it. Still, it
was
Mother
’
s Day.

“
How is she?
”
Hillary asked, with obvious disinterest and lack of concern.

Kathy star
ed blankly at Hillary for a long moment before finally replying.

“
Fine, I guess. The vet needs me to pick her up by three.
”

“
Storm?
”
Joshua chimed in.

“
Uh-huh, Storm
’
s coming home,
”
Kathy said, unsure if it was a good thing or a bad thing.

“
Hooray! Joshua cheered on happily. It was the first time he
’
d smiled all day.

Seeing Joshua
’
s excitement brought a thin smile to Kathy
’
s face as well. She felt her tension ease up just a bit.

“
Happy Mother
’
s Day,
”
Hillary said flatly.

Despite her tone, Kathy was pleased to hear the words. Hillary had made an effort and it was just what she needed to tip the scales in her favor.

“
Thanks, Hillary,
”
Kathy replied, her smile broadening.

“
I
’
m sorry you were so upset last night.
”

“
I just had a lot on my mind...I shouldn
’
t have taken it out on you.
”

Hillary smiled. Things were looking up. Maybe she wouldn
’
t have to
—

She deserves to die....

The smile left Hillary
’
s face. She felt nauseous again.

“
Hillary? Everything all right?
”

Hillary nodded.

“
I
’
m okay,
”
she said, forcing a smile on her face as she ignored her queasiness.

Kathy nodded.

“
Have some more macaroni and cheese,
”
she offered Hillary, who shook her head and fought hard to keep down what she had
already
ingested.

“
No thanks, I
’
m
full
.
”

Joshua was humming a cheery tune while he daydreamed, most likely thinking of Storm returning home.

“
Joshy, hurry up and eat, we have to leave soon and I still have to give you a bath.
”

Joshua had never been a neat eater. He was one of those toddlers who loved finger-painting with sauce and syrup...anything fluid enough to run his fingers through. Today he had cheese all over the front of his shirt and had managed to somehow get some of it on the side of his neck and left ear. Kathy shook her head in dismay as she assessed his mess.

“
You don
’
t have to take him along,
”
Hillary offered,
“
I can babysit.
”

Kathy
’
s heart skipped a beat. She didn
’
t trust Hillary.
Once again h
er instincts warned her that it was a bad idea...a very bad idea. But she loved Hillary and was just as leery of her instincts as she was about Hillary. Maybe she was just letting her imagination get the best of her. Hillary looked up at her with the most angelic eyes
as she
wait
ed
for a reply. How could she insult her? How could she hurt her feelings when she was trying so hard to prove herself?

“
We can play hide and seek and
—”

Joshua
’
s eyes widened and he turned to face Hillary.

“
Hide and seek!
”
he repeated,
“
hide and seek!
”

“
...and he can be my assistant when I start preparing your special dinner.
”

Hillary could read the ambivalence all over Kathy
’
s face. She looked longingly into her mother
’
s eyes.

Kathy wanted to trust her instincts. She knew deep down that she should play it safe and take Joshua with her. Yet, what message would she be conveying to Hillary then? She knew that she had made mistakes, terrible mistakes that she could never hope to rectify. Even if the worst-case scenario she had envisioned were actually true, she would have no one to blame but herself. Well, and Michael too. But if her worse-case scenario were true, Michael would be paying for his mistakes in hell. She would have to learn to forgive Hillary...to accept whatever she had done and to move on. Perhaps this was the leap of faith she needed to start finding closure.

“
Sure,
”
Kathy said, a bit hesitantly,
“
I
’
d appreciate that.
”

Hillary smiled
,
a great big grin
stretched across her face
to match her shining eyes.

“
Hide and seek!
”
she said to Joshua as she ruffled his h
air
.

“
Hide and seek,
”
Joshua repeated eagerly, as he pushed against the table move his seat back.

“
No,
”
Kathy stopped him,
“
you
’
ll play later. You still have to finish your chicken.
”

Joshua started whining. He picked up his chicken drumstick and lifted it back as if he were about to throw it. Kathy yelled out as Hillary held his hand gently.

“
Joshy,
”
she said sweetly,
“
don
’
t throw that or Mom will say we can
’
t play hide and seek. You wanna play, don
’
t you?
”

Joshua dropped the chicken to his plate, but continued whining.

“
I have an idea,
”
she said angelically,
“
how
‘
bout you finish that little piece of chicken and five more bit
e
s of macaroni...then we
’
ll be able to play together.
”