Hold Me Close (Devil's Chariots Motorcycle Club Book 1) (8 page)

“If she ain’t yours, then her man can come stick up for her.” Adam stood his ground. “Seems to me she's open season.” The comment riled Johnny up further.

“It's fucking respect.” Johnny raised his voice. “We don't fuck with the old lady of a brother.” The guys from the club were nodding and mouthing their agreement.

“Don't think he was my brother,” Adam said, and tugged on his jacket as a reminder that they weren't from the same charter.

“It doesn't matter,” Aaron piped up. “She's still another man's old lady.”

“And he ain’t sticking up for her.” Adam smiled. “That means there's no boundaries.”

“In our charter, there are still boundaries,” Johnny said. “We take our boundaries seriously.” He watched Beth's expression as she was being discussed.

He was hoping what he was saying was sinking in. He was not allowed to be interested in her. By club standards.

“I don't think I care about your boundaries.” Adam smirked before emphasizing the final word: “Brother.”

Johnny toyed with how to handle this. If he became too irate, it would be obvious to the guys. He had to keep it cool while still defending their brother and what was his.

“Guys,” he started. Involving them would take the pressure off of him. “I think it may be time we have a private chat with our brother here about the way we feel about this sort of thing.”

The guys agreed and seemed pleased with how Johnny had handled it. Not only that, but it left Adam with no choice but to walk away from Beth. No club member, regardless of charter, could back down from a challenge with another brother. He would have to.

As expected, Adam stepped away from Beth and followed the guys towards the back of the club house. The club girls and some other guys followed. There was no doubt what was about to come.

***

Bethany stood there dumbfounded. She had two guys battling over the ability to be with her. Neither of which obviously could—given the rules she'd just heard about. She wanted to follow and find out what happened, but instead she went back to her table.

“How fucking childish,” she exclaimed. “Dan is gone. I have to accept that. Why the fuck can't anyone else?”

Steph watched her friend closely. “Do you really want another gang member?” The question hung in the air for a minute.

Beth thought about Johnny. “I guess not,” she sighed. “Let's get out of here.”

***

Wandering back into the clubhouse without Adam, the guys from the club headed for the bar. Johnny's eyes scanned the environment but didn't find her. She had left. Hopefully not to find that douche they'd just taken care of. He would get her to nurse his wounds. And then she'd end up being his old lady.

Not only would that mean he was in danger from the club, it would also mean that he was in danger with Johnny. Because he'd kill that son of a bitch if he touched Beth.

“I like how you handled that,” Aaron said, patting him on the back.

“Nice to see that you still give two shits about brothers and their old ladies,” Chris joined.

“Of course.” Johnny poured the whiskey down his throat.

“I was beginning to wonder,” Phil chimed in with his opinion. “The way you've been hung up on that broad. I was beginning to think it was more than helping a buddy's old lady be safe and okay.”

“Not at all,” Johnny lied. “I'd never disrespect a brother.” And with that he stood and called Liza over to him. “Honey, why don't you come home with me and let's see what you've got to offer.” He took her arm and led her out of the clubhouse thinking nothing but about what Beth was doing.

***

“Careful, Beth.” Her friend was sitting in the car waiting on her to go inside her house.

Beth looked at her. “With what?”

Stephanie paused a second as if she were trying to decide exactly what she should say.  She wanted to give advice, but she didn't want Beth to hate her.

“It's trouble,” Steph said. “You should know this by now.” 

Bethany nodded. Her friend knew. She'd figured it out. She was warning her about Johnny. But was it necessary? With his words to Adam tonight he'd let her know that it was impossible for the two of them.

“We’re just friends,” she lied with a smile. “We'd never go there. It'd go against the rules.”

Her smile was fake. Her feelings were real. But she couldn't share those. It was a useless point. Johnny was with the club. He'd never betray them. And he'd made it clear that anything with her would be considered betrayal.

“And this date you told me about?” Steph remembered their conversation on the way to the clubhouse.

“It's not a date,” Beth answered as she opened the door. “Not a date at all. No worries.” And she got out and walked towards the house with a fake smile and a broken heart.

CHAPTER TEN

Liza had to go. He couldn't look at her after he'd seen Beth looking as sexy as she had. Liza wasn't nearly as sexy. There was nothing about her that appealed to him any longer. He didn't want to take her home. He wanted to go to Beth. He wanted to sit with her and watch movies. He wanted to tell her it was a date. He wanted to kiss her.

But he couldn't. It was against the rules. The honor. The loyalty. If he did any of those things, the guys would be after him. Losing his brothers would be the least of his worries.

The only thing he could definitely do was get rid of this trash on his lap.

“Time to go.” He pushed her off.

“What?”

She was definitely forward. He used to like that. But now he didn't find it attractive. In fact, he thought it was slightly repulsive. What had happened to the game? The chase? The trying to get what you wanted?

Club girls made too easy. They'd started offering before a man even needed to ask. But that's what they were for. For all of them. One at a time.

“I've got a lot to do.” And with that he rolled over and watched her get up, dumbfounded. No doubt she'd head back to the clubhouse and find someone else to take her home.

***

She couldn't sleep. The thoughts of what was happening and had already happened raced through her mind. She wanted nothing more than to ask him. Did he care? Was he after something more? Why had he chosen Liza?

She could still feel his breath against her skin, his arms around her waist. She could feel the heartbeat against hers. The beach. The bike. The look on his face as Adam held her.

Suddenly she realized what had bypassed her brain earlier. She hadn't thought of Dan. In those moments when Johnny held her, she had not thought about her husband. Late husband. The man she'd vowed to love forever. He hadn't crossed her mind.

That thought caused her to get out of bed. She needed a drink to calm herself. Did this mean that she was betraying him? Was it a sign that she was wrong? That she was forgetting the man she'd adored?

There was a piece of her deep inside that believed maybe it was a sign that this was okay. But she was afraid of it all. Terrified of her own feelings.

She made her drink a double. It was going to be a long night.

***

Johnny was restless. Partly because he felt guilty. Partly because he wasn't where he most wanted to be. God damn urges and desires were going to kill him.

As he lied in bed, he thought back over the time he'd been in the same goddamn place in life. He didn’t want to be there long, but somehow he stayed. And stayed. And in that time he'd not even had a decent piece of ass. Twice he'd tried it and both times he'd ended up at her door.

No wonder he felt so out of control. It was no surprise that the smell of her floral perfume sent him over the edge. He couldn't be blamed for the physical reaction he had when her body was so damn close. Of course he wanted to kiss her. He was frustrated.

The old Johnny would have jumped out of bed and found some hot little club girl to satisfy him. But he wasn't the old Johnny anymore. And he knew better. He'd end up hating her and himself.

What he wanted was to get up, go to Beth, and tell her he wanted her. But he couldn't. He'd hurt her worse than Dan ever did. And he'd betray his best friend who was no longer there. And he'd have to deal with the consequences of breaking the faith of his brothers.

What a fucking life to live! He thought it over and decided he'd tell her once they went out. It was time to head out. Get back to life. Get away from this mess that he didn't really want to leave. Get back to his jobs.

***

The house felt claustrophobic. She couldn't breathe. It was time to get out. She had to go somewhere, but she wasn't even sure where to go. It was late. She had been drinking. But she couldn't stay in the house one second longer.

Picking up her keys she headed towards the door. She had to stop the thoughts going through her mind.

Somehow the car seemed to drive itself. She had no destination in mind, but her vehicle ended up in the parking lot of the hotel. Was she really going to him? Would he welcome her?

Bethany didn't seem to care. She stepped out of the car and walked towards his room. Her nerves had the best of her. She knew exactly what she was going to do. When he answered the door she wasn't going to give him a choice. She would tell him. She wanted him. She needed him. She longed for him.

She had a lot more courage in her mind than she felt as she knocked on the door. But even her mind lost its hope when she knocked the third time and there was still no answer. That was when she checked the parking lot and realized his bike wasn't there. He was gone. Probably with Liza.

And Beth headed home in tears. Knowing once and for all that she and Johnny were nothing more than friends who shared the same heartache.

***

He wondered where she went. Had she even come home? Her car was gone. He'd given it a chance and tried knocking, but she didn't answer.

His mind wandered to the worst possible case scenario. She was with that douche from the bar. Or another douche. He'd pushed her too far. He'd forced her to give up.

Every second he sat there, pining over what he was thinking, he remembered the look on her face. The desire she had shown. Maybe it'd overcome her and she'd gone looking for the satisfaction she'd needed.

Johnny gave up. He'd gone to tell her the truth. It was a date. He wanted her. But she was gone. And the reality hit him. It was better this way. He needed to stick to the plan and get the fuck out of this situation for good. Before he lost everything that mattered.

Beth matters. That was all he could think as he climbed on his bike to leave.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Bethany felt guilty as she put the final touches of makeup on. She didn’t wear much, but she liked to freshen up just a bit when she was going out. She looked down at her blue sundress and wondered if this was wrong.

It shouldn't be wrong. They were friends. What was the harm in going out? Why would that be wrong?

The guys. The club.
A little voice answered immediately in her head. The knowledge that she shouldn’t—couldn’t—be doing this lingered in the back of her mind. She’d told her best friend, Steph, but she didn’t want the word to get around. It was innocent. Friendly. Just a movie. No big deal. Right?

Especially considering that she had no doubt where things stood. She knew that he'd been gone last night. He didn't want her. So it wasn't wrong. They were friends. Just going somewhere else to do the things they did anyway. No big deal.