Holier Than Thou (The Tome of Bill) (12 page)

“I know. Hands to myself.” She took a step and stopped. “Does she own a gun?”

“How the hell should I know?”

“Oh yeah, that’s right. You’ve never been here.” She placed one foot over the threshold. “How’s it feel knowing I got in before you?”

“Bite me.”

“No thanks. I’m just warning you, though, this bitch takes a shot at me and all bets are off.”

“What are you gonna do, try to bite her? Oh yeah, that’ll show her. She might even need to rent a steam cleaner to get you out of the carpet.”

Sally turned to glare at me, but I shooed her forward so we could avoid getting caught breaking and entering should her compulsion fail to hold.

Once in, I shut the door behind us, taking care not to touch the handle with my bare skin.

“She’s not here,” Sally decreed.

I almost asked how she knew, but then caught myself. One of these days I would get used to having superhuman abilities. I took a deep breath through my nose. Sheila’s scent immediately filled my nostrils. Damn, I had almost forgotten how nice she smelled.

I held my breath. What if her powers extended to her lingering scent? I waited a moment. When I didn’t immediately immolate from the inside out, I let out a laugh.

“What’s funny?”

“Nothing, just being stupid.”

“I’m surprised you don’t laugh twenty-four / seven then.”

I ignored her and tried to focus, but it was difficult. Fantasies of Sheila and me running along a beach together ran through my mind as I breathed in her essence. We were in a park having a picnic. We were enjoying a day out in the...I shook my head to clear it. Jesus Christ, that was pathetic even for me. One whiff of her perfume and suddenly I had tampon commercials running through my head. Okay, concentrate, Bill. Save the
Summer’s Eve
fantasies for another time.

Sheila’s scent was all over the place...duh, it was her apartment. My own place probably smelled like an unholy fusion of Tom, Ed, and myself to an outsider. The more I took it in, though, the more I realized it wasn’t recent. The odors were lingering, not fresh. Sally was right, she wasn’t there. I’m not exactly skilled in this, but I’d say it had probably been several days since she had been...maybe longer.

I looked at Sally, who just shrugged nonchalantly.

“You’re not surprised, are you?” I asked.

“Nope. I figured we had a good chance of finding this place empty.”

“Why?”

“Think about it. What’s the first thing you did after learning you were a vampire?”

“I went home and tried to resume my normal routine.”

“Okay, you’re a bad example. Think of someone whose entire life isn’t centered on being a dork.” Sally walked around the apartment, looking at what was on the shelves. She stared at a few pictures on an end table, presumable photos of Sheila and her...life, I guess. When she started talking again, her tone took on an odd faraway quality.

“She’s had an entire month on her own. That first night, she was probably far more freaked out than you. You only had the surprise of finding out she was the Icon. She, on the other hand, had her entire world turned upside down. One second her life was normal and the next...poof, magic and monsters are real. The thing is, who are you gonna talk to about that sort of stuff? You got lucky, Bill. Your friends are the type that probably jizzed themselves the second you told them what was up.”

She continued talking. For some reason, her tone perhaps, I didn’t want to interrupt.

“Not so with everyone. Most people know that if they tried telling anyone that sort of thing, even their best friend, they’d just look crazy. So what does she do? I’m thinking a normal person either finds a bar or pops open a bottle of hard liquor. Maybe it all even seems like just a nightmare come the morning. She gets back into her routine, probably not even realizing that she’s grabbing onto it like a drowning man with a life preserver.”

“How do you...”

“She tried to move on with her life. It’s amazing how a new day can make the monsters seem so far away. Who knows how long she kept it up, maybe even an entire week - but little by little, it ate into her. I wonder how many times over those first few days her hand hovered over the phone as she debated whether to call you - maybe even hoping that you would reach out first to either tell her it was all real or confirm it was a dream.”

Okay, now I was starting to feel like a real shit.

“Eventually, though, it was too much. Maybe she couldn’t deny it anymore or maybe her powers flared again. Hard to say on that last one, though it’s possible. It might have been spontaneous or maybe she just bumped into the wrong person. From there...well, who can say? All we know is that she’s not here now.”

“How do you know so much?”

“Just guessing.”

“Were you?” I prodded.

“Yes,” she replied, a little too harshly. Almost immediately she was back to being her normal self. “And don’t ask me about it again or I’ll cave your skull in.”

I held my hands up in a placating manner. She turned away, then began poking her head into the other rooms of the apartment.

“What are you looking for now?”

“Nothing, just being nosy. She’s not much for interior decorating, is she? I think my grandmother had more style.” She stopped in front of a shelf and pulled out something. “Ooh, I don’t have this CD.”

“Put that back,” I demanded.

“Oh please, Bill. It’s not exactly grand theft.”

“It’s not yours.”

“She doesn’t even listen to it.”

“And how do you know that?”

“Simple. I’m not on fire right now.”

Bitch!

* * *

Sheila’s apartment was a bust. There were no messages on her machine and nothing to indicate where she had gone, assuming she had gone anywhere. Sally had checked her closets and, in between criticizing her wardrobe choices, said everything appeared pretty full. If she had taken anything with her, she had packed light. I haven’t cased too many apartments in my time, but if I had to guess, I’d say it seemed as if one day she left as normal and simply never returned.

I wasn’t sure what that meant. Colin’s team, whoever they might be, hadn’t had time to arrive yet. As for Decker, I doubted it was him. He wasn’t that subtle. If he and his people had found out Sheila was the Icon, they would have taken out a full page ad in the
New York Times
proclaiming it.

Was it possible she just decided to leave on a whim? Maybe, but my gut was telling me no. There was one other possibility to consider, though. If she truly felt alone - thought that she was either losing her mind or becoming some sort of monster - could she have...

“What’s wrong, Bill?”

“Huh?”

“You just spaced out and then turned a shade paler, if that’s even possible.”

“I was just thinking about what you said.”

“Well, unfortunately, it’s too late for that. You should have worried about getting a tan back when you were alive.”

“Not that. Earlier.”

“What?” she asked.

“That stuff you were saying about her being alone and trying to get back to normalcy.”

“I told you not to bring it up. That wasn’t about me!”

“Who’s talking about you? I meant Sheila.”

“Oh,” she said, looking slightly embarrassed. “Okay then. What about her?”

“Well...I really don’t want to consider this. But do you maybe think, she could’ve...”

“Could’ve what?”

“You know.”

“I know what?”

“Been really depressed and feeling all alone...maybe she...”

“Offed herself?” she asked nonchalantly.

“Don’t be so cavalier about it.”

“Sorry, can’t help it. We do run one of the biggest suicide hotlines in the city, you know. Tends to desensitize me.”

Yeah right. To supply the coven with fresh kills and likewise keep the stupider elements from bringing too much attention to us, Sally had instituted the hotline. Using it, the coven was able to identify those whose disappearances wouldn’t be noticed. Ugh, just thinking about it skeeved me out.

“Yes,” I tried to shake off the dirty feeling I got whenever the hotline came up. “Do you think maybe she...hurt herself?”

“Nope,” she replied as if discussing the weather.

“How can you...”

She turned toward me. Despite the fact that I was several inches taller, I got the distinct impression she was looking down upon me. “Wise up and think beyond the end of your dick for once. Decker probably wouldn’t have been all gung-ho to fuck with the vampire nation if he was able to divine that she iced herself.”

“That doesn’t mean...”

“And, she’s not gonna do it anyway for one good reason.”

After a moment, I finally asked, “And that would be?”

“She’s the fucking Icon, genius. You don’t become one unless you truly and deeply believe in yourself. They call it faith, but let’s not bullshit ourselves here. Those with self-esteem problems need not apply. Wherever your girlie is right now, she might be confused, she might even be afraid, but I guarantee she is not contemplating eating a bullet. End of story. So stop moping about like you’re at her funeral because if you don’t, and we’re too late, you just might be.”

A Typical Day at the Office

We had only a few hours until daybreak, and the weather report called for sun for the rest of the week. There wasn’t much that could be accomplished on our end. Fortunately, the same could be said of any vampire team, so at least they would be in the same boat. The mages would be free to operate, but they were probably just shooting in the dark. They’d have a better chance at finding a needle in a haystack, especially in a packed city during business hours.

There was also the fact that the weekend was over and I had a project due at work. At the very least, it could take my mind off of things and give me a little time to think of my next step.

I parted ways with Sally and hopped on the subway back to Brooklyn, hoping to make it home before the sun came up and ruined my day even further.

Despite the forecast, the day was overcast - stupid weathermen, but good news for me. The trains ran on schedule and I made it back to my apartment with time to spare. Thank goodness too. Exhaustion hit like a freight train once I walked in the door. The excitement of the weekend hadn’t left a lot of time for shuteye. I had work to do, but it could wait for a couple of hours.

I walked in, noted the distinct lack of dead bodies lying about (you’d be surprised what you check for when you’re one of the undead), and slunk to my bedroom door.

You’re probably expecting me to tell you that I opened it and Sheila was there waiting for me. Well congratulations, you’re probably a fan of bad romantic comedies. Maybe you should go rent one.

Alas, the only thing waiting was my bed. But all things considered, it was enough for the moment.

* * *

By the time I awoke, Tom was long gone for the day - off to his job as an office drone in the city’s financial district. That was fine. The stuff I needed to talk about was probably best kept from his ears for now.

As expected, I found Ed in our kitchen nook sipping a cup of coffee. He grabbed a mug and filled it for me when he saw me drag my ass in. Some days I don’t know what I’d do without my wonderful friends.

“You can put the blood in yourself,” he said, handing it over. Well, maybe they’re not
that
wonderful.

As I stirred it in with some sugar, he not-so casually asked, “So how’s Sally?”

“Loaded up to her neck with STDs.”

“You look like shit.”

“You have no idea.”

I filled him in on the details of what occurred after he dropped us off. Despite my tale of destruction, bloodshed, and woe, he remained his typical stoic self. He raised an eyebrow a few times as he sipped his coffee, but that was the extent of his reaction. Guess Sally wasn’t the only one getting desensitized to this stuff. It was a pity she was a soulless killing machine. Otherwise, they might make for a nice couple.

When at last I had finished, Ed put down his now empty mug. “And the reason you couldn’t have told me this when you called
is
? I wasn’t too busy yesterday, so I might have been interested to know that wizards could have firebombed this place at any moment.”

“Sorry, man. We kind of figured it was one of those cases of ignorance being bliss. Besides, I didn’t know if Christy was here or not.”

“She wasn’t. I think she came down with something. Tom said she must have had a stomach bug.”

“Maybe she finally opened her eyes and got a good look at him.”

“Could be.”

“But you see my problem?”

“Yeah I guess,” he said. “Although I’m pretty sure she’s on the outs right now with Decker.”

“I wouldn’t know.”

“No shit. You’ve been playing a one man game of hide and seek ever since...”

“I know!”

“Of course, but I’m still gonna give you crap about it.”

“Have I mentioned how nice it is to be home?”

“Isn’t it? Oh, almost forgot, Dave called yesterday. Said he couldn’t reach your cell phone.”

“I kind of lost it in the explosion. Let me guess, he was pissed I missed the game.”

“Pretty much.”

“He was probably annoyed that he didn’t get to cut any more pieces off of me either.”

“He didn’t say. I told him you were probably busy with vampire business, although I got the feeling he wasn’t entirely sympathetic.”

“Dave lives in his own little self-centered universe. I’m pretty sure he just sees the rest of us as little more than lab rats.”

“Doubtless.”

“He is a good dungeon master, though.”

“A skilled DM is probably worth a few missing digits.”

“True enough...maybe.”

Ed paused to refill his cup. “So is it safe to say that your self-imposed exile is over?”

“I don’t think I have much of a choice.”

“So what’s
our
next step? And before you say anything, yes, we’re a part of it. You need to cut that
I need to spare my human allies the danger that comes with my job
bullshit. You aren’t Superman, and I sure as shit ain’t Lois Lane.”