Homecoming (A Boys of Fall Novel) (20 page)

“It’s hard, after all these years, to wrap my head around being happy here.”

“Maybe you’re going about it the wrong way. Try wrapping your head around how you’ll feel
not
being here.”

Lonely. Once again on the outside. And without the only woman who’d ever lit up his day with just a look or a simple touch. “Why won’t she go with me, Coach?”

He didn’t bother feeling embarrassed by the way his
voice cracked. This man had seen him at his worst and at his best and everything in between.

“It’s not that simple, Sam. Let me ask you a question. What would you say if I told you Helen wants me to move down south somewhere? Maybe somewhere warm.”

Sam shook his head. “She’d never ask you to do that. This town is part of who you are. Not only the team but . . . oh.”

“Yeah. This isn’t just the town where Jen lives. It’s not just a job. She fights for those kids just like I fought for you. You know how it is here. How bleak the prospects can be. She gives them hope. Gives their parents hope and help and everything she has to give. Have you ever looked through the scrapbooks on the shelf in her office?”

“No.” To be honest, he hadn’t even known there
were
scrapbooks in her office.

“When the kids go off to college, they send her things. Pictures. Awards. Newspaper clippings. Anything those kids are proud of, they send to their parents and to Jen.” Coach paused to take a sip of his coffee. “Now, I’m not trying to say anybody’s right or wrong here. That’s not my place. I just want you to understand that it’s a lot harder for her than simply changing jobs. You’re asking her to give up a part of her heart in exchange for yours.”

“Shit.”

“Ever since you were a teenager, that’s been your response to me finally breaking through that thick skull of yours.”

“How come your advice always makes things simpler and yet more complicated at the same time?”

“Hell, you coach football for as many years as I have and you’ll find yourself talking the same way.”

Sam snorted. “It’s amazing Kelly’s got such a good head on her shoulders.”

“Thank God for her mother,” Coach said, and then he laughed, his rocker creaking in the cold sunshine.

—

J
en parked next to Sam’s truck and made the long walk up the stairs to his apartment, her stomach in knots.

She looked like hell warmed over, and she knew it. Her hair was pinned up in a sloppy bun. No amount of makeup was going to hide her puffy eyes and the lingering redness of her nose, so she hadn’t even tried. She smelled good, thanks to a long soak in the tub with her aromatherapy bath beads that hadn’t helped. But that was all she had going for her at the moment.

It didn’t matter, she thought as she walked to the door. He’d told her he loved her, so hopefully he’d look past it and be happy to see her. And if she was lucky, he’d be
really
happy when he heard what she had to say because after the worst night she’d had yet and now bolstered by macaroni salad, she’d realized happiness was within her grasp. All she had to do was take it.

When Sam opened the door, her first thought was that he looked almost as rough as she did. His eyes were sad and his mouth looked grim as he ran his hand over his hair.

“Can I come in for a minute?” she asked.

“Of course. Is everything okay?”

She waited until he’d closed the door and turned to face her. “I want to go with you.”

His sharp intake of breath made her sorry she hadn’t
worked her way up to it, but then he slowly shook his head. “I can’t ask you to do that, Jen.”

“You’re not asking me to. I want to. Unless you’ve changed your mind, which is fine. I mean it’s not fine, but I’ll pretend it is and get out of your way.”

Sam closed the distance and pulled her into his arms, squeezing her so hard she could barely breathe. But she didn’t care as long as her arms were around him. “I will never change my mind about you.”

“I don’t want to spend the rest of my life without you in it, Sam. That’s more important than anything.”

“I told them no.”

She went still, the room silent except for the thumping of his heartbeat against her ear. “What?”

“I thanked them for their interest, but told them I wasn’t interested in leaving Stewart Mills.”

She tilted her head back so she could see his face. He didn’t look like a man who regretted the decision he was talking about. “When did this happen?”

“About twenty minutes ago. I was trying to get control of my nerves and then I was going to come see you. You beat me to it.”

“Sam.” She sighed, tears burning her eyes. “You really wanted that job. You should call him back and . . .”

“No.” He put his finger under her chin and lowered his mouth to kiss her.

She sighed, melting against him as every part of her being seemed to sigh in contentment. His mouth was soft and gentle, almost tentative as they savored each other again. It was right, she thought.
This
was right.

When he broke off the kiss and she opened her eyes, she hoped her face reflected the same love and happiness that his did.

But they weren’t done yet. “No matter how much you kiss me, you’re not going to distract me. You wanted that job.”

“I did. But, more importantly, I think I wanted to be asked. It felt good to be wanted because they respected my role in the community and not because I look like a guy who’s good at physical labor. I got caught up in that and lost sight of what’s important and that’s you.”

“I should have said yes when you asked me to go with you, though.”

“No, you shouldn’t. And I shouldn’t have sprung it on you like that. We should have discussed it instead of me putting you in a position of just saying yes or no like that. I’m sorry.”

“I’m still sorry I said no.” He smiled, stroking wisps of hair away from her face. “What will you do for work?”

“I’ll find something. I always have in the past. And the rumor about new buyers for the mill is rumored to be more than a rumor.”

“Or so rumor has it.”

He laughed. “It actually is true. I know because Chase has already talked to them and I already know there will be work to be had.”

“What about coaching?”

“I’m pretty sure I know a guy who’ll let me volunteer at our high school.”

Jen’s heart beat rapidly in her chest as it really started sinking in that this was happening. “Are you sure you’ll be happy here?”

“I’m already happy here. With you. And since I intend
to stick close to you for the rest of my life, I’m pretty sure I’m going to be a very happy man.” He paused to take a deep breath. “You know, for so long I looked around this town and all I could see was my past. But now I see you and I see my future.”

“We can make that come true,” she said, her voice husky with restrained tears.

“I love you, Jen.” He pressed his lips together for a few seconds, his obvious struggle with his emotions tugging at her heart. “I love you. I’ve never said those words to anybody and I don’t know how to prove it to you, but I do.”

She stepped closer to him, wrapping her arms around his waist and tilting her head back to look at him. “Sam, you don’t have to prove anything to me. I love you, too. And you love me and that’s all we need.”

“I only need you.” He pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. “You accused me once of using you as a comfort object. You’re not a comfort object for me because you’re not an object. But you
are
my comfort. You make my life everything I wanted it to be just by sharing it with me.”

Tears slipped down over her cheeks, but she smiled to let him know they were happy tears. “You’re really staying?”

“If you’ll have me.”

“Oh, I’ll have you, Sam Leavitt. I called dibs, and I’m keeping you.
Forever.”

November . . .

D
ylan Clark met them at the Stewart Mills town line in his cruiser, pulling in front of the first bus with his lights flashing and siren wailing. The cars behind the buses laid on the horns, and people spilled out of the houses they passed to wave to the football players cheering and yelling out the open bus windows.

Sam looked across the aisle at Coach McDonnell, who was sitting behind the driver and watching the boys by way of the huge mirror over the driver’s head.

Stepping out onto the sidelines of the University of New Hampshire’s football field with Coach for their division’s championship game was a moment that would be forever at the top of Sam’s lifetime highlight reel. He’d given Coach back his whistle, but had been given one of his own when he
accepted the position of assistant coach. The stipend wasn’t much, but it wasn’t about the money, anyway. He wanted to give back to the community he’d made peace with and would call home, and to the man who’d been like a father to him.

The boys had played one hell of a football game—both teams had—and when the Eagles pulled out the win in overtime, it was almost as emotional as the day he and Chase and Alex and the others had won the first trophy.

And Jen had been in the stands, right behind the bench where he could see her and get an encouraging smile to keep him going. The others were with her, of course—Kelly and Chase, Gretchen and Alex, his mom and Mrs. McDonnell—but whenever he looked in that direction, his gaze naturally fell on her beautiful, beaming face.

And now they were returning in triumph, announcing to everybody within earshot of the sirens and horns that the Stewart Mills Eagles were champions again. The cruiser led the buses and cars on a parade lap around the town square before they pulled up along the curbs and shut off the engines.

It was the weekend before Thanksgiving and the temperature was hovering around the forty-degree mark, but nobody seemed to care about the cold or their holiday to-do lists. There was a championship to celebrate.

Barbecue grills had been thrown in the back of pickup trucks, and Don and Cassie Jones had already offered boxes of burger patties and the fixings from O’Rourke’s freezers in the event of a big win. People brought whatever food they had available with them, from pasta salads to half-eaten bags of chips, and it was one hell of a party.

Sam managed to avoid manning the grills, but keeping
an eye on the teenagers and making sure the cans they were carrying around only had soda in them was a full-time job in itself. At least it was a job he could do with Jen at his side and her hand in his.

He saw his mom from a distance, in a conversation with some women that involved a lot of hand movements and laughing. For the first time, seeing her made him smile without hesitation and he didn’t poke at his happiness for her. They were looking forward, and she was a little stronger and a little more confident every time he saw her.

As if she felt his gaze on her, his mother turned. He lifted a hand to wave, and she smiled before excusing herself from her friends. He and Jen changed course to meet her halfway across the grass.

“Congratulations!” She was grinning, but her hands stayed at her sides, and he watched her fingers curl into fists.

Impulse made him let go of Jen’s hand and open his arms. His mom didn’t hesitate, and stepped into his embrace. He hugged her, giving her a squeeze. Her eyes were a little shimmery when the hug ended, but she was beaming.

“The boys did good,” he said.

“Of course they did. They have a great coach.”

“Why thank you, Sheila,” he heard Coach McDonnell say from behind him, and they all laughed.

“They have a pretty great assistant coach, too,” his mom said.

“That they do.” Coach’s hand fell on his shoulder. “I’m proud of
all
my boys.”

Sam nodded, the sudden lump in his throat keeping him from saying anything. He wasn’t surprised when he felt Jen’s hand slip into his and give it a little squeeze.

“I just wanted to say hello to Sheila for a moment,” Coach said. “Helen’s making me up a plate because she doesn’t trust me not to fill it with coleslaw and potato chips, but she’s letting me have a cheeseburger, so I’m not complaining.”

Sam watched Coach McDonnell walk away, thankful yet again for the man’s strength. If not for his constant mock-complaints about Mrs. McDonnell’s stranglehold on his diet, it would have been easy to forget he’d had a heart attack so recently. But his back was straight and his stride was long, and Sam had no doubt the man would be on the sidelines with him for years to come.

“I should get back,” she said. “They’re thinking about starting a book club that meets every other week and they invited me to come.”

“I’ll catch you later,” Sam said, giving her another smile. It felt good to have a mom, he thought when she smiled back.

Once they were alone, Sam and Jen started walking again, waving to the kids who were scattered all over the square. Some of them would be graduating soon, but he knew they’d keep in touch. And there would be new boys on the team to help mold into football players and damn good young men. He’d go home to Jen every night, and they’d have his mom over for dinner.

“Do you think they’re starting a real book club?” he asked Jen, since his mother was on his mind. “Or one of those book clubs that’s really an excuse to get together and drink wine?”

Jen shook her head, chuckling. “The woman in the blue sweatshirt Sheila was talking to is also a recovering alcoholic. They won’t be drinking wine, and she’ll enjoy having friends to talk about books with.”

“That’s good, then.”

“Hey, there are the others,” Jen said, pointing to a spot near the covered bridge where there was a small group of folding chairs. Alex and Chase were there with Gretchen and Kelly, and Alex beckoned them over when he saw them.

“Great night,” Chase said, taking a seat on one of the metal chairs before wincing. “A little chilly for metal chairs, though.”

“I’ll stay standing,” Alex said, and the rest of them agreed, except for Sam.

“While you guys were sitting in the stands, I was on my feet for that game. I can handle a little cold.” He sat and then scratched behind Cocoa’s ears when she stood in front of him and then collapsed against his knees. The dog sure knew how to get attention when she wanted it. Once she’d had her fill, she offered her paw for a high five and then went to collapse next to Alex and Gretchen again. If Sam had to guess, he’d say she managed to beg more than her share of people food at the cookout and was too full to do anything but stretch out on the grass and snore.

“That’s one hell of a sight, isn’t it?” Chase said, nodding his head toward the other end of the square.

From the covered bridge, the giant blue and gold banner hanging at the top of the old brick mill’s wall was visible.
PROUD SUPPORTER OF EAGLES FOOTBALL.

The new owners of the mill would need some zoning concessions to make the property work for the manufacturing business they were putting in, and they’d decided to make nice with the town by offering to ensure the football team had funding until the school budget recovered and could reflect the employment opportunities and contribution
to the tax base they brought to Stewart Mills. Jen had stepped in at the last minute and gotten some promises for the music department, too, so everybody was happy.

Including Sam and Chase, who would be working together to oversee the refitting of the mill. When that work was complete, Sam would stay on in a maintenance supervisory role while Chase would move on to whatever the next building job was, as long as it was close enough for him to be home by dinner. He was done in New Jersey. And a whole lot of unemployed people in Stewart Mills would be drawing steady paychecks again.

“I can’t believe how much has changed since spring,” Kelly said. She was standing behind Chase’s chair, her arms wrapped around him and her chin resting on his shoulder so their cheeks were almost touching. “The town was in a grim place. It looked like the end of football, and the kids were going off the rails.”

“And three best friends were all single with no hope of love on the horizon,” Gretchen added.

Jen laughed. “We sure fixed the hell out of that.”

Alex slid his arm around Gretchen’s waist and kissed her neck. “I’m pretty sure if you three women decided you wanted to take over the world, we’d all be in trouble.”

“Eagles Fest was enough,” Kelly said, and they all laughed.

“I think all three of us would agree Eagles Fest was the best thing that ever happened to us,” Chase said, his gaze still on the sign. “But I’d be lying if I said I’m sad we won’t have to do it again.”

“Watching from the stands is as close as I ever want to come to playing football again,” Chase agreed. “I never felt
as old as I did when we were facing these boys across the line of scrimmage.”

“Hell, we’re not old,” Sam said, snagging Jen’s hand and pulling her onto his lap. He kissed her before she leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder. “We’re just getting to the good
part.”